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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25193623">Dive</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/UninspiredPoet/pseuds/UninspiredPoet'>UninspiredPoet</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>World of Warcraft</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bad Decisions, Cheating, Depression, Extramarital Affairs, F/F, Flashbacks, Friends to Lovers, Lesbian Sex, Minor Character Death, Non-explicit het content, PTSD, Past Character Death, Self-Discovery, Sylvaina Endgame, Unhappy marriage, graphic depictions of death, mentions of past addiction</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:01:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>106,580</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25193623</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/UninspiredPoet/pseuds/UninspiredPoet</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaina Menethil is a high-profile attorney at Menethil &amp; Associates. A full partner, as a matter of fact. She has everything she's worked her entire life for.<br/>And she has never felt so empty. </p><p>On the other side of town - with the help of her friend Valeera, Sylvanas owns and runs Dive, the city's only gay bar. It's the side of town a Menethil would never be caught dead in. </p><p>Jaina just hasn't been feeling much like a Menethil, lately. A feeling that has put her on a collision course that ends right at Sylvanas Windrunner, and the cost is immeasurable.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Arthas Menethil &amp; Jaina Proudmoore, Jaina Proudmoore/Sylvanas Windrunner, Valeera Sanguinar/Tess Greymane</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>746</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>732</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Lovely</h2></a>
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    <i>Isn't it lovely, all alone?</i><br/>
<i>Heart made of glass, my mind of stone</i><br/>
<i>Tear me to pieces, skin to bone</i><br/>
<i>Hello, welcome home</i>
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</div>The minute Arthas rolled away from her, Jaina pulled the sheets over herself and licked her lips, finding them uncomfortably dry.<p>The heaviness of his breathing was almost deafening in their otherwise quiet bedroom, and she couldn't bring herself to look over at him.</p><p>“I'm going to go shower.” Her own voice sounded far-away and unfamiliar to her ears. She wasn't sure if Arthas had responded to her. Probably not. </p><p>She slipped out of the bed and made her way quickly towards the en-suite as she tried to hold the desire to crawl out of her own skin at bay.</p><p>She swallowed past the thick feeling in her throat as she turned the shower on quickly and stepped under the scalding spray of water.</p><p>It was too hot.</p><p>But it was hot enough to burn away the smell of his sweat on her skin, and that was what she needed most right now. </p><p>She wasn't sure when she'd started feeling this way. Gradually, maybe. </p><p>Maybe it was because of all the missed lunches and dates. Maybe it was because, after nearly ten years of marriage, she'd slowly been worn down into what she was now. </p><p>But she had nowhere to go. </p><p>Her breaths came hard and heavy as she leaned forward against the marble wall of her shower while multiple shower heads made her feel no less dirty. She remembered a time when the showers used to make her feel better.</p><p>They didn't help so much, anymore. </p><p>Jaina froze when she heard the bathroom door open, and hazarded a glance in the direction of the sound through the floor-to-ceiling glass shower wall. </p><p>She pleaded silently for him to just be using the bathroom or brushing his teeth, but he came right over. He leaned into the haven she'd sought so desperately and reached out towards her only for her to push his hand away as gently as she could manage. </p><p>“Arthas, please.”</p><p>“Jaina, c’mon. I'm not tired yet. I'll be quick.” </p><p>Jaina gave him a disparaging look and reached out for the handle of the shower door to keep him from coming in.</p><p>“I have a case to review after this, and I <i>am</i> tired.”</p><p>Arthas looked at her for a while longer before letting go of the shower door. “Guess I wore you out earlier?”</p><p>Jaina swallowed the venom that tried its best to slip into her response. “Yeah. Definitely.”</p><p>
  <i>Ten minutes would wear anyone out, Honey. You nearly broke my hip. I'll never fucking recover.</i>
</p><p>Jaina was alone with her thoughts again, then. After a wink from Arthas that she absolutely abhorred. </p><p>There wasn't much about her life that she liked, really. Not the six-bedroom estate house. Not the cars. Not the privilege that came along with the last name ‘Menethil’.</p><p>A gilded cage.</p><p>That's all any of this was.</p><p>She turned the water off after she successfully scrubbed herself raw and stepped out of the shower onto heated marble floors. She wrapped herself in a warmed towel and made her way over to the double vanity to wipe away the steam from the mirror.</p><p>
  <i>"I’m making a booze run, you want me to pick you up some hair dye?”</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Jaina looked up at Arthas from the file she'd been reviewing with her brows furrowed. “What?”</i>
</p><p>
  <i>“The grey. It's getting kind of noticeable.” Arthas’s tone was absolutely dry. As dry as his expression. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>“I'll...I'll just make an appointment.” Jaina finally responded, trying to sound dismissive as she turned her attention back to her case file.</i>
</p><p>Jaina looked into her own eyes in the mirror as she stood there. She looked at the darkness underneath them. She looked at how her cheekbones were getting sharper, much like her jawline. </p><p>Her hair was more white than grey, really. At her temples. Peppered here and there amongst the blond only just enough to be noticeable. A genetic thing. All the women in her family had gone grey as young as she'd begun to, if not sooner. Ah, well. She didn't mind it. She almost liked it. She'd stopped going to the salon last year. After years of bi-weekly appointments to keep it at bay. And Arthas had finally stopped mentioning it.</p><p>Little victories. </p><p>Jaina lifted a hand to quickly catch a tear that was about to fall before it had a chance to and turned away from the mirror to dry herself off. </p><p>By the time she'd made it back into the bedroom, Arthas was sleeping. Snoring like a sawmill, which meant she wasn't going to wake him up getting into her pajamas. More little victories.</p><p>She glanced his way for a moment as she walked towards the bedroom door.</p><p>She was sure most women found him attractive. He was, really. He'd been devastating when they'd met in law school. Charming in all the right ways. Her parents had liked him so much. </p><p>Jaina had always wanted to make her parents proud.</p><p>She shut the door behind her quietly as she shuffled out into the hallway in a loose pair of sweats and a tank top. Comfortable clothes because she'd be working far too late, and had to be back at the firm in the morning far too early.</p><p>The thing was, though, that she didn't mind.</p><p>She didn't mind locking herself in her office with its walls of bookshelves and antique furniture. She didn't mind the soft glow of her MacBook or the smell of manila folders and highlighters and white-out and the soft noises the printer made to the side of her desk each time she needed a fresh copy of something that wasn't scribbled upon beyond legibility. </p><p>Jaina mostly didn't mind working the way she was because, despite being a full partner, these were the only times she was really able to dig into her pro bono cases. One case a month. That's what the firm allowed her. She already took a majority of the firm’s female clients, but those women had money. Good money, to be able to afford her.</p><p>Over the past five or so years, though, Jaina had begun taking on the ones who couldn't. The ones who desperately needed the kind of help only an attorney as good as she was could provide.</p><p>This was hers. When nothing else in the world belonged to her, this did.</p><p>And she'd never lost one of their cases. Not a single one.</p><p>Women doing their best to maintain custody of their children - fighting against an ex-husband who was usually considerably more well-off.  Women stuck in endless cycles of court dates they just couldn't afford to keep going to.</p><p>Those were the women in these files. Those were the names and faces and countless tears and hugs behind these case numbers.</p><p>And maybe they were the reason she was still here. Maybe Jaina knew her marriage was a small sacrifice to make to keep making the difference she'd always dreamed she would.</p><p>And as her thoughts began to wander, her ever-sharp eyes caught something behind the glasses propped on the bridge of her nose that caused her to lean in closer to her computer screen.</p><p>A fatal error in the so-called ‘evidence’ being presented against her most recent client.</p><p>An error that was grave enough to win her the case.</p><p>Her fingertips blazed across the keyboard for what felt like only moments, but by the time she was done typing out her opening statement - she glanced at the clock to find that it was three o’clock in the morning.</p><p>Well.</p><p>Fuck.</p><p>The moment Jaina printed the last page and shut her MacBook, her body let her know that she was going to regret this late-night work frenzy tomorrow. Then again, she was nearing forty. Well. Thirty-seven, to be exact. But still. Things like this were harder on her than they used to be. </p><p>Another thing that was harder on her than it used to be was sleeping on the couch. But that was the only way she'd be getting any sleep, at all. There was a time she didn't mind her husband’s snoring all that much. But that was also a time when he wouldn't prod her awake in rather crude ways just before her alarm was set to go off.</p><p>Some days it was best to just avoid it all together. </p><p>Besides, she'd picked out a new couch last month and this one was much better on her back. And the cool leather felt good as she lay down along the length of it in the dark, too-big living room complete with a piano neither her nor Arthas could really play. </p><p>She fell asleep fast under a down-feather throw with her head on the arm of the couch.</p>
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</div>“Throw me that towel, hot stuff.” Valeera’s tone was tired, but she sounded like she was in good spirits. No doubt due to the phone number she'd scored earlier in her shift.<p>“Here. And stop sexually harassing your boss.” Sylvanas responded from behind the bar after she tossed a towel in Valeera’s direction then turned to continue putting little plastic sleeves over the pour spouts on their bottles. </p><p>“Wouldn't we have to not have had sex in order for me to be sexually harassing you?” Valeera asked as she began wiping down the tables of the well-worn booths that lined the wall of the little bar they ran together. </p><p>“That's-” Sylvanas stuttered as she turned around to send a pointed look in Valeera’s direction. “That is <i>not</i> the point.”</p><p>“Mhmm.” Valeera was smirking as she moved on to the next table. “Mad because I stole all your game?”</p><p>Sylvanas snorted from behind the bar and she moved around the counter towards Valeera once she finished the last bottle - plopping down in the booth the younger woman was currently cleaning and smiling up at her impishly. “If I wanted to have game tonight, I would've had it. I figured I would give you a chance.” </p><p>Valeera rolled her eyes and sat down opposite Sylvanas as she gave up on wiping down for now. “You're just trying to hurt my feelings because I'm getting laid tomorrow and you're not.” </p><p>Valeera knew that wasn't true, of course. But this was just how they operated.</p><p>Valeera knew Sylvanas hardly needed ‘game'. She was gorgeous sitting there wearing her usual little half-smile with her hair in waves around her shoulders. The rainbow glow of the bar’s neon sign cast an array of color over her tan skin - much of which was exposed in the cropped tank top she was wearing.</p><p>“I could get laid tomorrow if I wanted to.” Sylvanas countered as she regarded Valeera in much the same way Valeera was regarding her. </p><p>“Yeah.” Valeera responded as she sighed and slung her legs up into the booth to lean back against the wall. “I'd cancel my date for you in a second.”</p><p>“A lie, but I appreciate the sentiment.” Sylvanas was smooth and easy as silk in her reply as she draped one of her arms along the wooden top of the bench seat.</p><p>“I'm dead serious.” Valeera laughed along with those words. A lovely, genuine laugh reserved for moments like these. Nothing like the slightly more high-pitched ones the customers are up like candy. “You're a sure thing. I already know it's good. Who knows if this chick is gonna throw down like you can when you're feeling froggy?”</p><p>“God, you have such a way with words. I'll never understand how we didn't end up together. My heart is going to beat right out of my chest.” </p><p>Valeera lifted a brow at that particular jab and tossed the damp towel on the table-top directly at Sylvanas’s face.</p><p>Sylvanas caught it effortlessly, of course. Like she did everything else.</p><p>“Seriously,” Sylvanas began. “Borrow my car. Meet up with her, don't let her pick you up at your apartment. And you know what to text me if you need an out.”</p><p>“Sylvanas, I'm not twenty, anymore.” Valeera groaned with a roll of her eyes. “I know the drill, okay? Nothing’s gonna happen to me.”</p><p>“Oh, yeah. I remember suddenly obtaining infinite wisdom the day I hit twenty-five, too. Don't give me that. I'm just looking out for you. I'd hate to have to devote my entire life to avenging you.” </p><p>Valeera sighed. “Yeah. I know.”  Valeera looked around idly for a moment before turning her attention back to Sylvanas. “Her accent, though.”</p><p>“I know, Valeera, I heard it.”</p><p>“It's British.”</p><p>“Yep. Very nice accent.”</p><p>“She's hot, Syl.”</p><p>Valeera was staring at Sylvanas in a way that nearly made Sylvanas’s emotionless facade crack. </p><p>“Sylvanas. Did you see her?”</p><p>Sylvanas sighed, rolled her eyes, and pulled her keys out of her pocket to slide them across the table in Valeera’s direction as she pushed herself up to her feet. “I'll finish up here. Go grab us a pizza or something and meet me upstairs if you wanna have dinner and discuss how hot your date is.”</p><p>Valeera seemed more than a little pleased with herself as she snatched up the keys and darted for the door with Sylvanas watching her, smiling faintly all the while.</p><p>It didn't take her long to finish closing up. She'd done it a million times on her own. Before Valeera had come along, she'd had to do this nearly every single night. </p><p>By the time she was putting the mop bucket away, Valeera was back inside - locking up the door and shutting off the neons with a pizza box in one hand.</p><p>“I've got beer upstairs.” Sylvanas said from across the room as she headed for the door behind the bar that opened to the staircase that led to her loft.</p><p>She could hear footsteps behind her a second or two later, and she found herself envying the energy Valeera always seemed to have left after a long shift.</p><p>Her apartment wasn't much to brag about, really. A bed, a couch, a little kitchenette. But it was nice enough, between the exposed brick and the modern minimalist furniture that contrasted starkly against the broad wooden floorboards. </p><p>There was a bookshelf near the wall-mounted TV with not that many books on it. Just a few well-loved favorites. </p><p>And even though she hadn't made it to the light switch yet, they could both see well enough to get around thanks to the oversized windows on the living room side of the loft. </p><p>They were both familiar enough with these surroundings, though, that light didn’t really matter. </p><p>Valeera dropped the pizza on the glass and metal coffee table in front of the couch while Sylvanas dumped a cup of water into the plant next to the kitchen then grabbed a six pack from her fridge. </p><p>It was a routine. A comfortable one. Some nights it was different.</p><p>Some nights, they just fell into bed together. Gradually, it had become less and less about sex and more about comfort. </p><p>They just worked like this. As friends. It wasn't complicated. It was pretty perfect, really.</p><p>“Are you staying tonight?” Sylvanas asked as she popped the top off Valeera’s beer and handed it to her before sitting the rest of them down on the coffee table and plopping down next to her on the couch.</p><p>“Yeah. My mattress is shit compared to yours and I need my back to be nice and fresh tomorrow night so I can get it blown out.”</p><p>Sylvanas sighed and took a healthy swig of her own beer as she popped the pizza box open and grabbed a slice. “So, is she the one?”</p><p>“The one?” Valeera demanded incredulously around a mouthful of her own slice. “I just met her today, Syl, c’mon.” </p><p>“Yeah, well, you were out there on the sidewalk with her for half an hour and missed out on like half your tips which I paid out to you anyway, by the way. Unusual for you.”</p><p>Valeera was quiet for a moment before she shrugged and looked down at her beer. “I like the way she talks to me.” Valeera finally said as she lifted her gaze back to Sylvanas. </p><p>Valeera was oddly relieved to see the way Sylvanas’s expression brightened. </p><p>“So it isn't just the accent?” Sylvanas quipped, albeit gently.</p><p>Valeera made a noise that sounded like amusement. Mostly at herself. “No.”</p><p>“What color are her eyes?” </p><p>“Brown. But like...not...I don't know how to describe them. They're just really pretty.” Valeera looked a little flustered, and Sylvanas nudged her ankle gently with the tip of the brown leather boot she was wearing.</p><p>“You can talk to me. Promise. You're allowed to think a girl’s eyes are special. It's nice. You've been way too jaded for your age since the day I met you, and you have every right to be. But I'm happy for you. I'm glad she has pretty eyes and I'm definitely glad that you like the way she talks to you. I'll leave you alone about it if you tell me her name.” </p><p>“Tess.” Valeera responded easily with a little half-smile. “It's Tess.”</p><p>“I like that.” Sylvanas reaches out and gave Valeera’s knee a gentle pat before nudging the remote across the couch cushion in her direction. “Find something for us to watch.”</p><p>And so, Valeera did. She flipped through the channels all while Sylvanas kept half an eye on her and thought this new development over. </p><p>Sylvanas had been here through...oh. Countless flings. She’d often been one of said ‘flings’. But she wanted Valeera happy. Truly happy. </p><p>And they just wouldn’t work as anything more than friends. In fact, Sylvanas wasn’t entirely sure either of them had ever looked at the other as more than they were. Probably not. Valeera would’ve told her. Valeera didn’t have a problem telling her the truth. Sometimes she told the truth a little too much, maybe. And maybe that’s why they got along so well. </p><p>That didn’t mean Sylvanas didn’t <i>want</i> more than she had. It was just that what she already had was a lot. Between the bar and the girls she occasionally helped from down the way, she was a busy woman.</p><p>That’s what she always told herself. </p><p>She was just busy.</p>
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<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Broad-Shouldered Beasts</h2></a>
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  <p><i>But when you feel the world wrapping round your neck</i><br/>
<i>Feel my hand wrapped in yours</i><br/>
<i>And when you feel the world wrapping round your neck</i><br/>
<i>Don't succumb</i><br/>
</p>
</div><p> </p><p>Valeera had never really been on a date like this before. A date where she was actually...rather deeply interested in the person on the other side of the door she’d knocked on. </p><p>For a whole lot of reasons. Trust issues? Yeah. She had those in spades. Commitment issues? They made the trust issues pale in comparison. </p><p>Her relationships had all been fast and hard and meaningless. Well, aside from Sylvanas. But that wasn’t really a relationship, was it?</p><p>God, she was getting ahead of herself.</p><p>She’d only just come to the realization that the address she’d been given by Tess was to a house and not a bar or a cheap motel. </p><p>A house.</p><p>Not an apartment. </p><p>Valeera was just wondering whether or not she’d ever even fucked someone in a house this nice when the door opened and Tess was smiling out at her.</p><p>“Evening, pretty.” Tess greeted softly as she took a step back. “I hope you don’t mind an at-home date. I intend to make it worth your while, if that’s any consolation.” </p><p>“I don’t mind,” Valeera responded with a faint smile of her own and a slight brightening of her eyes even as her lids lowered. “I’m sure you will.” </p><p>She followed Tess inside and looked around as Tess shut the door behind her. </p><p>Tess really had meant that. Valeera just had no idea how much until she was sitting on a stool at the kitchen island enjoying a glass of wine while Tess cooked in front of her. </p><p>They’d even talked. They’d had a real conversation about how Tess had wound up here. About how her parents had sent her abroad to study and she’d just sort of...never gone home. About how she’d been all over the place and she was happy to enjoy the slow-down of this average town. </p><p>She’d even made Valeera laugh a time or two.</p><p>Those real, genuine laughs that weren’t often heard by bar patrons. </p><p>“You sound different,” Tess remarked as she tossed the salad while the steak she’d been searing rested on the counter nearby. “When you laugh for me, I mean.” </p><p>She lifted her eyes to meet Valeera’s when she said that, and Valeera huffed - a small, appreciative sound before she took another sip of her nearly-finished wine. </p><p>“You have a gorgeous laugh, love. Don’t be so dismissive.” Tess continued, her tone a touch more serious, now. </p><p>“If you aren’t careful, we aren’t going to make it to dinner.” Valeera quipped as she reached across the counter for the wine bottle to top her own glass off. </p><p>Tess looked almost wounded. “Have I given you the impression that I’m a ‘puts out on the first date’ type of woman?” </p><p>Valeera lifted a brow and stared for a moment. </p><p>And then Tess was laughing. </p><p>“You’re an ass.” Valeera accused, and Tess snorted quietly as she slid a plate in Valeera’s direction. A plate of perfectly cooked and sliced thick-cut ribeye and fennel salad that, in Valeera’s opinion, would have been just as at-home in a high-end restaurant. </p><p>“Am I?” Tess asked in a low tone that Valeera had a little trouble discerning whether or not Tess’s tone was teasing or flirtatious. Both, maybe. </p><p>The smirk on Tess’s lips pointed in the direction of ‘probably’, though. </p><p>“I like it,” Valeera said, feeling more than a little spoiled by the time Tess was finally sitting next to her with her own plate. “I like this a lot, actually. It’s nice.” </p><p>“Change of pace?” Tess asked, slicing one of her pieces of steak into a smaller bite as she waited for Valeera’s answer. </p><p>“You could say that. I don’t really...this is a date, right?” </p><p>Tess laughed softly and popped her first bite into her mouth. “I had only assumed that it was. But it doesn’t have to be anything that you don’t want it to be.” </p><p>“It can be a date.” Valeera offered with so little hesitation she surprised even herself. </p><p>“Oh, thank you.” The words were teasing, but Tess’s expression was as soft as it had been for most of the evening. </p><p>“Oh, it’s no problem at all. Really.” </p><p>Tess was genuinely amused at receiving a taste of her own medicine in return, and they finished their dinner in relatively comfortable silence. </p><p>It was a little too tasty to talk through. </p><p>Definitely better than the junk Valeera was used to eating. </p><p>And then Tess was getting up to clear their plates away and gesturing towards the softly lit living room beyond the kitchen. “There’s a bottle chilling in there if you’d like to stay a while. If not I’d be more than happy to walk you to your car.” </p><p>Tess actually sounded like she meant that. She actually sounded like she was more than satisfied with having just enjoyed Valeera’s company over dinner and nothing more. </p><p>And that fact coupled with the way she kept tucking her impossibly dark hair behind her ears while she worked at straightening up made Valeera want to stay more than anything else had. </p><p>“No dessert?” Valeera responded to Tess’s question with another question and a raise of one of her eyebrows. </p><p>Tess pushed the door of the dishwasher closed and glanced at the otherwise empty countertop as she dried her hands on the nearest towel then looked up at Valeera. </p><p>“A girl can only hope, hm?” Tess walked around the counter and reached for both their empty wine glasses, but stayed there for a moment - leaned in very close to Valeera. “In answer to your question, the bottle in the living room is a really nice Moscato. It’s traditionally a dessert wine. But if you’re staying, I’m open to other suggestions.” </p><p>They wound up in the living room, of course. With Valeera straddling Tess’s lap and the now mostly-empty bottle of Moscato forgotten on one of the end tables. </p><p>Tess was a good kisser. Soft when she needed to be soft. </p><p>Hard when she needed to be hard. </p><p>Her hands felt strong and confident as they slid up Valeera’s thighs and along her ass to stroke the warm skin of her back beneath her shirt. </p><p>And she had just the right amount of appreciation for the occasional, gentle catch of Valeera’s fangs against her lower lip.</p>
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</div>“So tell me about the date. Haven’t heard from you aside from telling me my car was safe outside this morning.” Sylvanas urged with a soft smile as Valeera took a seat at the bar. It was empty now, aside from the two of them. They’d had a little rush when Valeera got in, but they were usually pretty slow late on Tuesdays. A good chance to catch up on events that had happened over the weekend.<p>Events that Valeera had, apparently, been too busy to text her about in-depth. Which was a first. Sylvanas hadn’t been worried, really. It was just so unusual. She was used to 3 AM texts about how good or bad the sex was, among other things. </p><p>Valeera was already smiling before she said anything. She was already taking a sip of the beer Sylvanas had opened for her and making herself comfortable on her usual ‘spill-the-tea’ stool. </p><p>“Well, I didn’t recognize the address she texted me. Turned out to be her home address.” Valeera paused and tilted her beer bottle with the tip of her finger against the neck as though she were stalling for time.</p><p>“So…” Sylvanas prodded gently. </p><p>“She cooked me dinner.” Valeera finally said with a faint shrug and a strangely unfamiliar expression on her face. She looked almost lost for a moment. “A really nice dinner. And we talked. We talked a lot. I mean not about me, because I fuckin’ hate that. But we still talked. Wound up on the couch together. Then the bed. And then I stayed.” </p><p>“You...you stayed the night?” Sylvanas asked incredulously. “I figured you just drove my car home.” She was about ten seconds away from having to open a beer of her own. </p><p>“Yeah,” Valeera responded with a little laugh and a slight shake of her head. “I stayed. She took me out for breakfast and told me she hopes I’d like to see her, again.” </p><p>“Would you?” Sylvanas asked as she pulled out a beer for herself and opened it. “Like to see her again, I mean?” </p><p>“Believe it or not, yeah. Yeah, I really would.” Valeera sounded almost put-upon by her own statement, and it made Sylvanas laugh to herself. </p><p>“There’s nothing wrong with that. I just want you to be with someone who treats you well. And if she treats you well enough that you haven’t even spilled the beans about the sex, then I approve.” </p><p>“I mean, the sex was amazing,” Valeera said with a little smirk. “Not to brag. But yeah, she’s...she’s something else.” </p><p>“Oh, of course not. You’ve never bragged about anything a day in your life.” Sylvanas’s tone was sly and mildly amused, but it did nothing to deter Valeera. </p><p>“I’m telling you. Ten out of ten.” Valeera didn’t mention the fact that she’d enjoyed laying in Tess’s arms afterward more than she’d enjoyed the sex. She didn’t mention that she’d lingered outside Tess’s house that morning after breakfast kissing her and nothing else. </p><p>Sylvanas didn’t need to know all that, and Valeera wasn’t really sure she could say any of it out loud, right now. </p><p>But that didn’t mean she wasn’t still thinking about it. About all of it. </p><p>At least Sylvanas looked relatively pleased with all she said. </p><p>But then Valeera’s face fell a little and she reached out to nudge Sylvanas’s beer closer to her. “Hey...you should really-”</p><p>Valeera trailed off when she caught movement through the windows of the bar. Her sharp eyes locked onto the woman before she even got to the door. Pulled back hair. Nice glasses. Suit with a pencil skirt. </p><p>“Speaking of ‘you should really’, your type is about to walk through the door right now.” Valeera muttered under her breath. </p><p>“Valeera, don’t be ridiculous. I don’t have a type.” Sylvanas chided as she turned her back so she could see the door as it dinged on its way open. </p><p>“...Oh.” </p><p>“I’m assuming you want this table?” Valeera asked as she slipped off the stool and sat her beer down behind the bar. </p><p>“I’ll sit her. You can take it after.” Sylvanas responded as she hid her own beer and offered the stranger a friendly smile. She always gave Valeera the tables that looked like they’d tip big. </p><p>And judging by the Italian leather briefcase and Valentino heels, Valeera was in for a treat. </p><p>“Hey. Welcome to Dive.” Sylvanas greeted from the end of the bar. “You want a booth, or would you prefer the bar?” </p><p>“A booth, please,” Jaina responded. “I hope you don’t mind if I catch up on some things while I drink. It looked like you guys were slow, so I figured…”</p><p>“Totally fine.” Sylvanas responded, fairly upset with herself for her own choice of clothing today. Torn boot-cut jeans and a tank top weren’t exactly impressive fair in whatever world this woman had just come from. </p><p>Oh, well.</p><p>Sylvanas walked her over to a booth, the chunkier heels of her own boots sounding in counterpoint to the tips of Jaina’s stilettos against the old wooden boards of the floor. </p><p>Jaina sat down and placed her briefcase on the counter, not really paying Sylvanas half the attention Sylvanas was paying her as she pulled her MacBook free from her bag. </p><p>“Uh...there’s an outlet right under the table if you need it. Your server’ll be over in a sec.” Sylvanas’s ears were cocked at a rather strange angle, not that Jaina would’ve noticed. </p><p>Valeera sure did. </p><p>And the minute Sylvanas returned to the bar, she was treated to a disparaging look from the younger woman. “Fuckin’ smooth, Syl. I got wet all the way across the room.” </p><p>“Valeera, can you please keep your voice down and go take her drink order?” Sylvanas’s voice was a hiss, and it took everything Valeera had to nod and make her way over to the booth with a glass of ice water.</p><p>“Hey, I'm Valeera. If you need anything tonight, I'm your girl.” Valeera was smiling as she looked down at Jaina, who offered her a quick smile in return as she opened the screen of her MacBook.</p><p>“I'd love a Manhattan, thanks. With Mitcher’s rye if you have it.”</p><p>“You have good taste, and we do. I'll be right back.” </p><p>Valeera grabbed a clean glass while Sylvanas eyed her from the corner she was leaned in, and Valeera turned to her and whispered urgently under her breath.</p><p>“What the everloving fuck goes in a Manhattan?”</p><p>Sylvanas just chuckled and put the glass Valeera had selected back, choosing one that was a more appropriate size and getting to work on making a drink that Valeera considered ridiculously complicated. </p><p>Then, she tried her best to busy herself when Valeera made her way back over to the table and placed the drink down on a napkin near Jaina’s hand.</p><p>That was when Valeera first noticed the ring. She was rather used to looking for them, really. For various reasons.</p><p>“Time away from the wife?” Valeera asked with an easy smile as she placed a little bowl of salted almonds on the table.</p><p>Jaina looked over in confusion. First at Valeera, then at her ring before she laughed a little awkwardly.</p><p>“Oh, no. No, I, um. Time away from the husband, actually.”</p><p>“Maybe men, in general?” Valeera asked with a sly smile. “You came to the right place for that. Well. I mean unless you’d shown up on bear night.” </p><p>Jaina couldn't help but laugh. She couldn't help but wonder how long it had been since she had. It felt and sounded so foreign. </p><p>“Definitely men, in general. My entire life consists of men being...men. I'm sure you understand.” Jaina found Valeera so easy to talk to, yet she couldn't help but glance across the little bar where Sylvanas was slicing something out of her view. “So, who’s the boss? I didn't catch her name.”</p><p>“That's Sylvanas.” Valeera glanced over and had to stop herself from snorting when the other woman's ear flicked in response to hearing her own name. “She owns the place.”</p><p>Jaina nodded and thanked Valeera in a way that let her know she was good for now, so Valeera retreated back to the bar and relieved Sylvanas of her orange slicing and peeling duties. Jaina seemed like the type to want more than one drink, and Sylvanas was nothing if not prepared to accommodate.</p><p>“She's married,” Valeera said quietly as she began working at her task. “Husband at home.”</p><p>“Oh…” Sylvanas’s voice was just as quiet.</p><p>“She asked what your name was. Didn't realize you were capable of finding a woman so attractive the thought of introducing yourself would slip your mind, entirely.”</p><p>“Doesn't really matter, does it?” Sylvanas asked as she took a seat at the stool that she kept for herself near the register. </p><p>“Don't be so...emo about it.” Valeera tried to lighten the mood - in actuality, she was a little bummed, too.</p><p>Sylvanas was lonely, and Valeera knew it. And she seemed less and less inclined lately to bite all the lines the young women who visited the bar on the weekend threw her. </p><p>“I'm not. Don't be ridiculous. She was pretty. She looks smart. I like that, that's all. It isn't a big deal.” </p><p>It really wasn't.</p><p>But Sylvanas swore Jaina looked at her each time she leaned away from her computer long enough to take a sip of her cocktail. </p><p>Not that she wouldn't have known that if she wasn't looking right back. </p><p>Maybe that's why, when Valeera began cleaning up, Jaina packed away her computer and made her way towards the bar to close out her tab - Jaina said something in her own defense.</p><p>“Sylvanas, right? You look familiar.” She was pulling out a Black Card. Of course, she was.</p><p>“Do I?” Sylvanas asked as she swiped it and slid the receipt across the bar top in Jaina’s direction. “I don't think we've met.”</p><p>“Maybe not.” Jaina waved a hand dismissively as she signed the receipt. “Thank you for letting me take up one of your booths all night. I had a rough day at the Firm and so just needed to disappear for a while. Your bar is lovely, by the way.” </p><p>“Come back any time. Tuesday through Thursday are our slow nights. Firm? Like a Law Firm?”</p><p>“Menethil and Associates.” Jaina responded with a smile that was much more forced than the ones Sylvanas had seen prior. </p><p>She laid a fifty dollar bill on the counter as she shouldered the strap of her briefcase. “Will you tell Valeera she makes a wonderful Manhattan when she gets that?”</p><p>Sylvanas was ready to answer when she noticed the expression on Jaina’s face. One that told her that she might, perhaps, have seen Sylvanas make all her drinks. </p><p>“I'll let her know.” Sylvanas offered sheepishly.</p><p>Jaina lingered for a moment without really knowing why. Long enough that it became a little awkward, even. </p><p>“I'll let you guys close up shop, now.” Jaina finally said. “I'm sorry if I kept you late.” </p><p>She had. It was an hour past the time they usually shut down on their slower nights.</p><p>“You didn't. Not at all. Feel free to stop by anytime you'd like a drink with your late-night work.” Sylvanas’s ears shifted back far enough that the movement caught Jaina’s attention. She didn't know what it could possibly mean, but she noticed nonetheless.</p><p>“That's kind of you. I might take you up on that offer.” </p><p>Valeera was eyeing Sylvanas hard over Jaina’s shoulder across the room. Straining to hear every word that was being said.</p><p>And Sylvanas was about ten seconds from lugging an orange in her direction, but Jaina’s departure from the bar and through the door saved her from any such public displays of violence. </p><p>Valeera was at the door the minute Jaina was out of it - looking at her unabashedly as she crossed the street.</p><p>“Fuck, look at that Benz…” Valeera sighed as she turned to find Sylvanas frowning at her from much closer than she expected. “...What?”</p><p>“Stop it, Valeera.”</p><p>“I'm not doing anything!” Valeera complained with a pout. “It's just total bullshit that she has a husband who probably sucks when my friend could've bagged a fuckin’ lawyer tonight.” </p><p>“A couple hours ago, you were making fun of my utter lack of game and now you're saying I could've bagged a lawyer tonight.” Sylvanas handed a broom over to Valeera, who looked as though she'd just received a death sentence. “She left you a fifty, by the way. It's on the bar with your pay-outs.” </p><p>Valeera looked much less betrayed by being made to sweep, then. </p><p>They cleaned up in silence for a while.</p><p>It was Valeera who finally broke it.</p><p>“But like, let's be real. Let's figure this out. For science.”</p><p>Sylvanas sighed as she gave the floor another stroke with her mop. “Alright. For science. Do your worst.”</p><p>“One, she’s hot. She's too old for me, but like - damn. Two, she had bags the size of minivans under her eyes. I'm good enough with makeup to know that. So we could surmise she doesn't get much sleep. Happy people sleep, right? And why did she drive across town to a gay bar just to get some work done?”</p><p>Valeera had said her piece, and seemed satisfied with her summary of her observations, even if they didn't seem very scientific to Sylvanas. </p><p>“I don't know, and I don't know. Maybe she's going through some things at home. It's not really any of my business.”</p><p>“Right, right. But you could make it your business is all I'm saying.”</p><p>“Valeera, I'm not that kind of person. I never have been, and I never will be.”</p><p>“I'm not saying you should like, fuck her in front of God and everyone. I know you're too good for that shit. I know you're not me. I'm saying she could probably use a friend, right?”</p><p>Sylvanas paused in her mopping for a moment before she continued.</p><p>“Don't talk about yourself like that. Besides, she might not even come back, Valeera. But I'll take the table if she does.”</p><p>Valeera counted that as a win whether or not it really was one. It was hard to score points with Sylvanas, and she usually took them where she could get them.</p><p>In reality, Sylvanas's thoughts were lingering way too much on the things Valeera had noticed. </p><p>She'd been helping women for so long, the thought of one suffering just ate her up inside. Even if said woman was obviously ridiculously rich and successful.</p><p>Both their attention shifted, though, when the sound of the door being pulled at cut through the silence in the bar.</p><p>“It's one of the new girls.” Valeera observed as she looked through the door at the rather dejected-looking woman who had already begun to turn and leave.</p><p>“She probably didn't make it back to the shelter before curfew. You know how Maiev is. Get her inside and get a cup of coffee in her and I'll get on the phone with Maiev.” </p><p>Valeera didn't have to worry whether or not there was a pot brewed behind the bar.</p><p>Sylvanas always kept one fresh for just such an occasion, which were rather frequent during the colder months of the year.</p><p>This, too, was a routine.</p><p>Valeera pouring coffee for a shivering woman sitting in a dark bar while Sylvanas went to war with Maiev on the phone in the stairwell nearby trying to get her to agree to let her back in for the night.</p><p>Sometimes Sylvanas won those battles.</p><p>Sometimes she didn't.</p><p>It just depended upon the girl. Upon what kind of mood Maiev was in.</p><p>Valeera’s had been a battle Sylvanas had lost once, years ago. </p><p>Years ago, when she'd spent the night on Sylvanas’s couch and been offered a job. Her first real job.</p><p>Tonight, at least, Maiev was in a forgiving mood. Which was good, because by the time Valeera got back with Sylvanas's car from dropping the girl off with Maiev, Sylvanas could see it written all over her face.</p><p>“You okay?” Sylvanas asked gently as she locked up behind Valeera, who was still standing near the doorway in her jacket.</p><p>“Yeah.” Valeera lied in a whisper.</p><p>“Come here.” Sylvanas murmured, pulling Valeera into her arms in a hug that was almost too tight, yet somehow not right enough. “I've got you. You're okay.”</p><p>Valeera nodded against Sylvanas’s shoulder as she leaned into her. “Can I come upstairs?”</p><p>“Always.” Sylvanas murmured as she stroked slowly along Valeera’s back. “You aren't that girl anymore, Valeera. You know that, right?” </p><p> Valeera didn't have an answer for her right then. In fact, she didn't have anything more to say until she'd showered and curled up in bed in one of Sylvanas's shirts with Sylvanas pulling the blankets over her.</p><p>Valeera caught one of her hands before she could get too far away, and without hesitation - Sylvanas kicked off her boots and left her jeans on a pile in the floor so she could get under the blankets with Valeera. In quick order, Valeera was curled against her and Sylvanas was getting them comfortable.</p><p>When they were quiet and still, Valeera finally spoke.</p><p>“What if you get tired of me? I could be that girl again so fast.” Valeera was whispering like it would hurt her to say that any louder. Maybe it would have.</p><p>“You're my best friend, Valeera.” Sylvanas murmured as she cradled the back of Valeera’s head when she pressed her face into her chest. “You're the best friend I've ever had, I love you, and I'm never getting tired of you.”</p><p>Valeera let out a shuddering breath as her only response.</p><p>“What's got you so messed up, hm?” Sylvanas asked against Valeera’s still-damp hair. “Is it this thing with Tess? Because I'm happy as hell for you, you know. I’ll be even happier if it gets serious. I swear.”</p><p>Valeera might never know how Sylvanas could read her so well. How she could be so right so often.</p><p>“I know you're telling the truth. I just get in my head sometimes. I start to wonder what I'm really worth to people. You're the most important person in my life and I don't want to throw that away for someone I barely know. I also don't want to wind up on my ass with nowhere to go because you don't have any reason to keep me around.”</p><p>“I want you around because you're a damn good bar manager, a damn good mixer, and a damn good friend. Not for any other reason.”</p><p>“I didn't even know what was in a Manhattan.” Valeera countered half-heartedly. </p><p>“But you learned. I bet you could make the best Manhattan imaginable right now. You're a fast learner,  Valeera. And you're so fucking smart. Smart enough to know I'm not gonna let you get away.” </p><p>There was quiet again, then. Valeera’s heart wasn't beating quite so hard. Sylvanas’s hand stroking over her hair was helping a lot with that. But nothing helped more than the gentle reassurances. Nothing helped more than knowing she meant something significant to someone she had always believed was a genuinely good person in a sea of people who could throw human beings away like so much trash.</p><p>“Sorry.” Valeera said, sounding more asleep than awake.</p><p>“Don't apologize for having feelings, Valeera. You're allowed to have them. I won't tell anyone. Promise.”</p><p>“You better not.”</p><p>Sylvanas kissed the top of Valeera's head and then settled her own against the pillow they were sharing tonight.</p><p>“I won't. Get some rest. I'm right here, and so are you.”</p><p>“That's gay.” Valeera whispered.</p><p>“I'm gay, Valeera. I can't help it. It just slips out sometimes.”</p><p>Valeera was only awake long enough after that remark to let out a singular, huffy breath that sounded like a laugh. </p><p>Sylvanas didn't last much longer, either. </p><p>Which was good.</p><p>It was only a matter of time before Valeera would steal all the blankets and curl up with them on her own side of the bed.</p><p>But that was fine, too.</p><p>Sylvanas learned long ago to keep a blanket stowed beneath the bed for blanket thief-related emergencies.</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Clown</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
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    <i>I'll be your clown</i><br/>
<i>Behind the glass</i><br/>
<i>Go 'head and laugh</i><br/>
<i>'Cause it's funny</i><br/>
<i>I would too if I saw me</i></p>
</div>Jaina smiled at Terenas across the expansive dinner table in much the same way she had smiled at all her fellow partners that evening.<p>Convincingly, and with absolutely no feeling.</p>
<p>“Well, in any event - I'm glad those charity cases have been going in your favor, Jaina. They may not be adding to our accounts, but they're certainly going a long way in polishing our reputation.” </p>
<p>Arthas’s hand was on her thigh beneath the table. She wasn't certain whether it was that, or his father’s comment that made her feel so ill. The combination of both, perhaps. She had no interest in the firm’s reputation. Not really. Not anymore. </p>
<p>She repeated those words to herself over and over.</p>
<p>
  <i>You are doing this because you want to. Because you need to help. Because you are good, and for no other reason.</i>
</p>
<p>Arthas’s hand crept higher. Played with the hem of her skirt.</p>
<p>She pushed his hand away as subtly as she could manage.</p>
<p>“Speaking of Jaina’s successes, when can I expect my first grandchild to be born into this world bound for greatness?” Terenas was grinning. He meant nothing by it.</p>
<p>Jaina was trying not to shudder.</p>
<p>“As soon as she lets me make it happen.” Arthas responded in a tone that earned a chuckle from the partners. <i>Her</i> partners.</p>
<p>“I thought we agreed we would start trying when you started practicing, dear?” Jaina remarked in a cool tone as she lifted her glass of wine to her lips.</p>
<p>No one laughed.</p>
<p>Because everyone knew. Everyone knew Arthas had been trying and failing for years, now, to pass the bar.</p>
<p>They also knew Arthas hadn't succeeded in his most recent attempt. But you didn't talk about that. You weren't supposed to talk about that.</p>
<p>There was a long span of fork-clinking before Terenas cleared his throat.</p>
<p>“So the Super Bowl is coming…”</p>
<p>“Don't worry, Dad. Jaina will be making that dip you like.” Arthas responded with a wink before popping a bite of filet into his mouth. </p>
<p>This lightened the mood considerably.</p>
<p>Everyone loved that dip.</p>
<p>Wifey’s dip.</p>
<p>Little Susie Homemaker, Attorney at Law.</p>
<p>Jaina could taste the bile rising in the back of her throat as she placed her wine glass back down on the table.</p>
<p>Arthas completely owned the room for the duration of the night. Her comment was forgotten. Pushed under the rug like so much dust. </p>
<p>Arthas, the Golden Child. </p>
<p>She watched him now and again as he talked.</p>
<p>Examined the strong line of his jaw and the slightly-drunk glint of his blue eyes and the curve of his mouth when he smiled and showed his perfectly white teeth.</p>
<p>And she felt nothing. </p>
<p>Her attention shifted around the room as she was largely ignored, not that she was making much of an effort this evening.</p>
<p>It was almost comical, really. Put Arthas in a room with her and suddenly everyone forgot who had almost single-handedly dragged their firm out of the dark ages. They forgot who she was. How hard she worked. How ruthless she was in the courtroom.</p>
<p>It was almost comical that it was times like these that made Jaina remember most who she was. </p>
<p>The evening stretched on into cigar smoking and fine liquor-drinking that Jaina didn't partake in. She just sat in a plus armchair near Arthas dutifully. Seething. Roiling in her own internal conflict with her jaw clenched so tightly and for so long that it began to hurt.</p>
<p>By the time they made it to the car, Jaina was trembling.</p>
<p>By the time Arthas shut his door and turned a pointed look in her direction and let the words tumble out, she had reached the point of no return.</p>
<p>“Don't say shit like that, Jaina. Don't fucking try to make me seem less-than to my colleagues just because my father cares about our family line. You're thirty-seven. How much time do you really think we have left?”</p>
<p>“I don't know, Arthas.” Jaina responded quietly, slowly turning her icy gaze in his direction. “You tell me.” </p>
<p>“Oh. Nice. Games. Dramatics. That's just what I need right now.” Arthas threw his hands in the air and smashed the start-button of the car, and Jaina reached over and pressed it again. The engine hadn't even had a chance to turn over more than a few times before it went silent, again.</p>
<p>“What you need right now is a reminder.” Jaina’s voice trembled, but only faintly - to her credit. “You need to be reminded that those aren't your colleagues. They are mine.”</p>
<p>“Oh, don't start with this bullshit again, Jaina. You wouldn't be shit without my-”</p>
<p>“Your what, Arthas?” Jaina demanded, the flush in her cheeks rising to her ears along with the volume of her voice. “Your fucking father? Hm? Your father didn't put me through law school. Your father didn't win my cases. Your <i>father</i> doesn't have to <i>fuck</i> you just to avoid an argument because he has work to do that doesn't involve coddling you.” </p>
<p>“Oh? Really? So this is about my dad, hm? Is that it?” Arthas's voice wasn't as loud as Jaina’s, yet the condescension in it was deafening. “After everything he's done for us?”</p>
<p>“Daddy’s money dried up a long time ago, Arthas.” There was venom in Jaina’s voice, now. Perhaps more than Arthas had ever heard. “Those are my cars you're driving. My house you're living in. My fucking <i>food</i> you're eating. And my name on the credit cards when I don't manage to cover something.”</p>
<p>Arthas was so angry he couldn't speak. So taken-aback that he couldn't formulate the words.</p>
<p>“You know what, Arthas, sure.” Jaina spat, reaching over to push the button to start the ignition. “Let's go home. I'll put my fucking legs up for you and beg you to put a fucking baby in me or whatever it is that you fantasize about, and I'll pray your father can support us while I take time off to raise him because of some patriarchal bullshit you were raised to believe and never grew out of. Let's go live this fantasy of yours. And what kitchen will I be barefoot with a baby on my hip in, hm? Certainly not ours. We would be lucky to afford a two bedroom on what you make. <i>Lucky.</i>”</p>
<p>“This is honestly too much, Jaina. You're being completely irrational. I made <i>one</i> comment for a laugh and you are out of your fucking mind about it.” Arthas wasn't looking at her, anymore. It was almost as if he couldn't.</p>
<p>“I'm not your punchline, Arthas. And it's not one comment. It's a hundred comments. A thousand comments. It's you not holding up your end of the bargain. It's you treating me like your personal plaything regardless of my caseload or how much work I have to take home with me.”</p>
<p>Arthas rolled his eyes and finally looked over at Jaina. “I could see how that would be a legitimate argument if we had sex more than once a month.” </p>
<p>Jaina was quiet for a beat or two. Thinking about those words. Mulling over how much of a sacrifice it felt like every time she slept with him. Every single time. </p>
<p>And she picked her purse up out of the floorboard and opened her door.</p>
<p>“Don't wait up.”</p>
<p>Her voice was quiet, and when Arthas reached out and grabbed her wrist she yanked it away immediately. “Don't fucking touch me, Arthas.”</p>
<p>“Where are you going?” He demanded from the driver’s seat, only to be met with the passenger door slamming shut. </p>
<p>Jaina didn't have to walk far to find a place to wait for the cab she’d called. Arthas had left. She knew he would. He hated a scene, and wouldn't have dared to get out of the car after her.</p>
<p>While she waited, she wondered where she would go. She wondered what place she could hide to find some sort of <i>sense</i>. Of self. Of peace. Of anything, really.</p>
<p>She was giving the driver the address to Dive not ten minutes later, even as her hands still trembled faintly as she clutched her purse.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
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</div>“Enjoy your date.” Sylvanas said with a smile as Valeera made her way past the bar towards the door.<p>Sylvanas was leaning over it watching her friend. Smiling for her because she'd never seen Valeera go on a second date. And she'd never seen Valeera this happy about a date, in general. </p>
<p>Sylvanas only had one table left that night. She could handle it. The women sitting at it were mostly just chatting and ignoring their drinks, anyway.</p>
<p>And that was a fact that she was extremely thankful for when the door dinged open a few minutes later and Jaina walked in - clearly not dressed for the office, but very overdressed for the bar.</p>
<p>Sylvanas greeted her with a small wave and observed her lack of briefcase or anything else that could possibly have held anything work-related aside from a small purse.</p>
<p>When Jaina came directly to the bar and took a stool without so much as looking around and ordered a Manhattan without saying anything else, Sylvanas nodded faintly and got to work on the drink right in front of her.</p>
<p>Alongside the drink, a shot glass was placed in front of Jaina. A matching one in front of Sylvanas.</p>
<p>“No offense, but you look like you need this. It's on me.” Sylvanas was holding her own little glass up, and Jaina offered her a weak smile as she lifted hers as well.</p>
<p>“You buy mine and I'll buy yours.” Jaina responded before downing her shot. She grimaced just a little despite the quality of the liquor. Sylvanas didn't.</p>
<p>And then she took a quick sip of her well-mixed Manhattan and continued ignoring the vibrations of her phone notifications in her purse.</p>
<p>“You know…” Sylvanas began and leaned over so only Jaina would hear her as Jaina looked past her to the wall of bottles behind the bar. “There's this old-fashioned notion that you can talk to your bartender. Like a therapist that also gets you drunk, y’know? Everything okay?”</p>
<p>“That is rather old fashioned.” Jaina agreed as she slowly turned her attention to Sylvanas to find the soft silvery glow of her eyes focused on her own. “And no. No, everything’s not okay if I'm being entirely honest. But I don't really think you need to hear about it.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s ears shifted in a curious manner, and Jaina glanced downward at her drink. When had it gotten so hard to really look at other people? </p>
<p>“Fair enough.” Sylvanas responded, glancing towards her other remaining table to reassure herself they didn't need anything before she found a glass to start polishing. “Then what else is up? What do you do? Valeera tells me you're an attorney. What kind of law do you practice?”</p>
<p>“Civil suits, mostly. High dollar ones because that's what my firm wants.” She realized how disgusting that sounded the moment she said it, and hurried to her own, unnecessary defense. “But they allow me to take one case pro bono a month. Those are usually women buried in paperwork they can't afford to dig their way out of. That's...that's the kind of attorney I always dreamt I would be.”</p>
<p>“Sometimes it's like that.” Sylvanas responded quietly, placing the glass back in its rack and starting on another Manhattan when she noticed Jaina’s was already gone. “So, you wanted to help women. Marginalized people. And then you became something they can't afford. And then you decided to do something about it.”</p>
<p>Jaina was quiet for a while. Long enough that there was a fresh drink in front of her by the time she spoke again. “I guess when you put it that way, I've got a sliver of ‘dream’ left.” </p>
<p>“There's always at least a sliver, right?” Sylvanas asked with a crooked, fanged grin that somehow eased some of the tension in Jaina’s shoulders when she saw it.</p>
<p>Jaina leaned against the bar. Just a little closer to the first real conversation she'd had in as long as she could remember.</p>
<p>“And did you always want to own a bar?” Jaina asked, holding her drink in both hands.</p>
<p>Sylvanas laughed. An easy, wonderful sound. Nothing forced. Just...natural and real. Nothing like the world Jaina lived in outside of this bar. </p>
<p>“I was a social worker for ten years.” Sylvanas said, leaning against the bar now, too. Not directly in front of Jaina. Just to the side of her. “Got my degree and wanted to save the world. I really believed I would. Until I realized the whole thing was bullshit. The system. I took all my savings and ran off like some rebellious teenager and found this place. It was so run-down it took weeks just to get the doors back open.”</p>
<p>“And then?” Jaina asked with a furrow between her brows. “It sounds like there's more to that story.”</p>
<p>“And then I realized I bought a bar that's a block away from a women’s shelter because the world works in mysterious and infuriating ways.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas looked to be in deep thought for a moment before she pulled a business card out from under the register and slid it in Jaina’s direction. “If you're ever short on cases, a lot of them could probably use help like yours. No pressure, of course.”</p>
<p>“No, no.” Jaina reassured her quickly as she examined the card for a moment before tucking it away in her purse. “No, I really appreciate this. I mean it.”</p>
<p>“Good. I'm glad.” And she really was. She'd give the shirt off her own back to any one of those girls that had come in here for coffee. She'd refused to take a salary for herself before just to float enough cash to let a few bus tables until a better job came along. She'd also literally given a few flannels and jackets off her back a time or two. Valeera wore one of them now and again, and it always made Sylvanas smile even on the worst days. </p>
<p>In her musing, Sylvanas hadn't realized her last table had gotten up to leave until they were already approaching the bar to pay out their tab. They were hanging off of each other in a way that suggested neither of them were going home alone that night, but in a really adorable way that made Sylvanas smirk as she rang them out.</p>
<p>She also caught Jaina watching them, not that they were sober enough to notice. </p>
<p>As soon as they walked through the door, Sylvanas made a comment about them.</p>
<p>“They were really sweet together, yeah?”</p>
<p>Jaina clenched her jaw and finished off her drink in silence, and Sylvanas's ears wilted a bit in response.</p>
<p>Before she could feel too badly, though, Jaina cleared her throat and spoke without looking at her.</p>
<p>“You know, I've really enjoyed this. It seems like I spend every second of every day talking at people. I couldn't tell you the last time I talked <i>to</i> someone. So thank you.” </p>
<p>Jaina pulled out her card and Sylvanas ran it, sliding a Jaina the receipt to sign and lifting a hand when she got to the tip line.</p>
<p>“That won't go to me if you leave it.” Sylvanas warned gently. “It was my pleasure having you at my bar tonight.”</p>
<p>“For Valeera, then.” Jaina responded simply as she tipped fifty dollars again for two cocktails and a shot.</p>
<p>“For Valeera.” Sylvanas agreed. “You can talk <i>to</i> me anytime, by the way. That's what bartenders are for, right?”</p>
<p>“We’ll go with that.” Jaina said with a smile that didn't look quite as pained as the one Sylvanas had gotten from her earlier. “I'll be back to bother you for another excellent Manhattan soon, I'm sure.”</p>
<p>A million responses ran through Sylvanas’s mind as the formidable diamond on Jaina’s ring finger flashed and glinted in the hanging lights of the bar. </p>
<p>
  <i>Door’s always open for you. Hey wait, you forgot my number. Do you have plans for the rest of the night?</i>
</p>
<p>“You're just being nice.” Sylvanas said with a chuckle as she looked down at the bar top she was wiping clean.</p>
<p>“Best Manhattan in town, actually.” Jaina corrected on her way out the door.</p>
<p>As soon as the bell dinged a second time, Sylvanas’s hand went still on the wet towel beneath it and she shut her eyes and she sighed deeply. </p>
<p>She had so many questions. So many nagging thoughts. Who the fuck wouldn't want to talk to her? She was brilliant. Engaging.</p>
<p>Who the fuck could be <i>married</i> to that woman and <i>not</i> be utterly enthralled? And was that person the reason Jaina had seemed so wounded when she'd walked in? Because Sylvanas could recognize that in a woman from a mile away at this point.</p>
<p>And she saw it in Jaina. </p>
<p>God, she needed a drink. </p>
<p>At least she owned a bar.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Closing Time</h2></a>
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    <i>Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end</i>
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</div>Valeera groaned quietly as the first moments of wakefulness began pricking at her senses. A moment that was softened by the warmth of a hand coming to rest against her bare stomach, and then an even warmer set of lips pressing a kiss to her shoulder.<p>“You can sleep in, love.” Tess whispered against her arm. “It's early, yet.” </p>
<p>Valeera relaxed immediately and reached for Tess’s hand to guide it away from her stomach towards one of her breasts, and Tess laughed softly - her voice still a little scratchy with sleep.</p>
<p>“You'd like for the morning to go like this then?” Tess asked as she ran a slow, lazy fingertip over Valeera’s nipple.</p>
<p>“Don't care.” Valeera mumbled, still refusing to open her eyes. “Just wanna be with you.” </p>
<p>Valeera felt the bed shift with Tess’s weight, and met the kiss that Tess gave her easily as the other woman slid one of her thighs across Valeera’s to get them closer. </p>
<p>“You're with me.” Tess whispered against the corner of Valeera’s mouth, earning a small smile from her.</p>
<p>“Mm, fuck.” Valeera rasped as her eyes finally began to flutter open. “I'm needy when I'm half-asleep. I need to get it together.” </p>
<p>“You can be needy.” Tess whispered against the underside of Valeera’s jaw, slowly tracing her fingertips around the curve of the breast she'd been guided to before abandoning it in favor of running a hand through Valeera’s hair.</p>
<p>Valeera was enjoying all of this far too much. So much, in fact, that she reached for Tess’s hand to stop her. </p>
<p>“How did you sleep?” Valeera asked. “Let me go make you some coffee.”</p>
<p>“I'm fine. Do you know what I would like very much?”</p>
<p>Valeera sighed and sagged back against the bed. “Mm?”</p>
<p>“To talk about you.” Tess responded simply. Gently - in the softest murmur against Valeera’s sensitive ear. “We never talk about you.”</p>
<p>Valeera felt the fear strike her like a bolt of lightning, and Tess felt it, too in the way Valeera went suddenly tense against her.</p>
<p>“Sorry, love.” Tess breathed as she pushed herself up and away so that she was sitting up.</p>
<p>“No, don't. Don't go.” Valeera reached for her and guided her back down until their eyes met and the comforting weight of Tess's body was pressed along her own. “Another time. I promise.” </p>
<p>Tess caught Valeera’s thigh as it lifted up along her side and slid her hand slowly down the back of it. “Of course.” Tess still sounded a little apologetic, but not embarrassed. She was a lot like Valeera in that regard. “What would you rather do?”</p>
<p>They were both the type of people that had no qualms saying and doing exactly what they intended to. </p>
<p>“You.” Valeera said as she shifted her other leg to the side so Tess could settle her hips between them. </p>
<p>“Me?” Tess asked with a little smirk as Valeera nodded and reached up to thread her fingers into Tess’s dark hair. </p>
<p>“Yeah.” Valeera whispered in response, leaning up to brush her lips against Tess’s before she dragged them lightly to her jaw to nip at it gently. </p>
<p>“Will you lay here and relax for me, then?” Tess asked as she tilted her head for another of those little bites. “I'll trade you an orgasm for that coffee you mentioned if you can manage it.” </p>
<p>“I get an effort-free orgasm and you get coffee.” Valeera mused, watching as Tess began leaving a trail of warm, lingering kisses down the center of her chest towards her stomach. “I think I can manage that.” </p>
<p>Tess didn't say anything else. She just enjoyed the feeling of Valeera’s hands in her hair as she made her way lower and began kissing between her thighs until Valeera had had more than enough kisses and urged her where she wanted her with a slight tug at her hair.</p>
<p>Tess smiled as her eyes flashed up to meet Valeera’s just before she gave in. </p>
<p>It wasn't long before a hiss from Tess told Valeera it might be best to grip the sheets instead of her hair, and not much longer after that that she was coming with Tess moaning softly against her and digging her nails into her thighs.</p>
<p>Tess didn't mind waiting for her coffee. Not when it was because Valeera wanted to laze around for a while after that, sighing and turning into her stomach secure in the knowledge that Tess would touch her there. That Tess would trace the line of her spine with her fingertips and kiss and nip her way across her shoulders.</p>
<p>She'd gathered that Tess liked her back. Or maybe she just liked giving her attention, in general.</p>
<p>But they'd struck a bargain, after all - and Valeera managed to get herself up despite how welcoming Tess’s bed was. </p>
<p>She managed to find a mug and figure out Tess’s coffee…machine. Whatever it was. Something fancier than they had at the bar, for sure. And then she realized she had no idea how Tess liked her coffee.</p>
<p>Tess was pulling on an undershirt when Valeera poked her head back into the bedroom and held up the empty mug with a question ready on her lips. </p>
<p>----</p>
<p>“Cream? Sugar?” Arthas asked as Jaina stared down at the toaster with a furrow forming between her brows.</p>
<p>“Black, Arthas.” She responded quietly. Ten years. Ten years and he still had to ask.</p>
<p>“Oh. Right.”</p>
<p>Arthas walked towards the bar of their kitchen and placed Jaina’s coffee down before sitting at the stool beside hers with his own. </p>
<p>They were quiet while Arthas ate his toast and Jaina sipped her coffee, scrolling through emails on her phone. At least until Jaina finally spoke.</p>
<p>“I'm going to the women’s shelter tonight when I leave the office. I probably won't be home for dinner.” Jaina’s voice was soft and even. She was trying.</p>
<p>She was trying so hard.</p>
<p>“What? Why?” Arthas sounded incredulous as he looked over at her and lifted a brow. </p>
<p>“I'm going to start taking an additional free client every month. The partners already agreed, before you ask. The shelter seems like a good place to find a client who needs the help the most.” </p>
<p>“You're going to get carjacked going to that side of town.” Arthas sounded a little disgusted. Maybe he was. “I don't know why you insist upon giving yourself more busy work. It's not like you need the tax write-off.” </p>
<p>Jaina placed her phone down and looked away towards one of the big bay windows opposite the kitchen. At their perfectly landscaped backyard beyond the covered pool. At the golden oaks still clinging to the last of their leaves, shuddering now and then in the morning breeze. Occasionally, one of those leaves would lose its battle and float gently downward. It was mesmerizing, in a way. Almost sad, but not without its beauty.</p>
<p>“Everything isn't about money, Arthas.” Jaina finally said as she returned to her business on her phone. “You used to agree with that sentiment.”</p>
<p>“I grew up.” Arthas responded matter-of-factly. </p>
<p>“Oh.” Jaina said with a little exhale through her nose that was almost a laugh. “Is that what happened to us, too? You grew up?”</p>
<p>Jaina didn't need to look at him to know he was rolling his eyes.</p>
<p>“Nothing ‘happened’ to us, Jaina. We had a little argument the other night. It isn't a big deal.” Arthas admonished, sighing heavily as he looked down at his smartwatch and pushed himself up from the stool he was sitting in.</p>
<p>Jaina looked at the plate and the mug he'd left behind for a long time before she finally stood and began straightening the kitchen. </p>
<p>Not a big deal.</p>
<p>She kept trying to get herself to agree. But she couldn't. Not anymore. There was so much resentment in her she felt herself choked with it.</p>
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  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>“I don’t care who you are. Visiting hours ended at six.” Maiev’s voice was almost abrasively hoarse. That was the first thing Jaina had noticed when she’d introduced herself and handed her card over.<p>“I understand that.” Jaina responded with an apologetic smile. “It was my intention to be here much earlier, and I would have been had I not been held up.” </p>
<p>“Well. Be that as it may, you’ll have to try again another time. The girls are eating dinner.” Maiev looked down at whatever file she was examining dismissively, yet Jaina didn’t move. </p>
<p>“I can empty these beds for you.” Jaina continued, taking another step towards the overcrowded desk in the center of Maiev’s overcrowded office. “Not quickly, but I can. I can get them out of the system. I’ve been doing it for years.” </p>
<p>“Trying to reverse bad karma?” Maiev asked with a lift of her brow without even looking up. “Lawyers usually have plenty of it.”</p>
<p>“No.” Jaina responded simply. “No, I just want to help in any way I can. I can take one of your girls on as a client every month. Depending on their circumstances, I can get their life back for them.”</p>
<p>“You’ll have to come back and discuss this further another time.” Maiev grumbled, rubbing at her temples now. “As I said before, visiting hours are over.” </p>
<p>“Maiev, c’mon. Don’t be like that. She means it.” </p>
<p>Both Jaina and Maiev’s attention snapped to a familiar voice from the office door to find a very bundled up Valeera standing there with her arms crossed. </p>
<p>Jaina offered Valeera a tired, grateful smile. At the same time, Maiev sighed heavily and shut the file she’d been pretending to go over. </p>
<p>“Valeera. What are you doing here?” Maiev asked as she peered at her and tried her best not to smile. Truth be told, Valeera had given her hell when she’d gotten here. She never would’ve thought she would be one of the ones to make it. But she’d made it. And she kept making it. And Maiev couldn’t say she didn’t respect the spirit Valeera had in her. </p>
<p>“Making sure you don’t give this lady too hard of a time. I saw her car pass by the bar and I figured I’d take a walk because, well, you give everyone a hard time.” Valeera’s voice was so matter-of-fact. And she was correct.</p>
<p>That was the worst part. </p>
<p>Maiev sighed again and leaned back in her chair, giving them both a vague gesture. “Fine. Fine. But get out, you. You’re never anything other than a distraction.” </p>
<p>“Sure.” Valeera responded with a smirk. “Just play nice, daddy.” </p>
<p>“Get <i>out</i>, Valeera.” </p>
<p>It took a lot of effort for Jaina not to laugh, but she managed. Somehow, it just seemed like that wouldn’t be the best idea right now. </p>
<p>In the end, Maiev produced a few cases for Jaina to look over. Cases that were, with the right help, very winnable in Jaina’s opinion. She told Maiev as much. Gave her specific reasons why.</p>
<p>And gradually, Maiev warmed to her. Began believing she really was just here to help. </p>
<p>So, Jaina was lucky enough to meet with her first client that night. A quick meeting, of course. Because it was after visiting hours, after all. But by the time she left, she was in much better spirits than she had been upon her arrival. </p>
<p>And so was the young woman she’d spoken to. </p>
<p>She nearly jumped out of her skin when Valeera appeared outside the front doors of the shelter while Maiev locked up behind her. She gasped audibly, and clutched her briefcase a little harder. </p>
<p>“Sorry.” Valeera said with a quiet laugh. “It’s just me. You’re safe. I just wanted to catch up with a few old friends while I was here. Mind giving me a lift back to the bar?” </p>
<p>“No. No, I don’t mind at all.” Jaina said as she gestured across the street where her car was parked. Valeera made her way over, and got in once Jaina unlocked it only to be surrounded, immediately, by luxury. </p>
<p>Soft leather, perfect stitching, dark interior. The best part, though, was the fact that Jaina immediately started the car and turned on the heated seats. </p>
<p>“Fuck. A girl could get used to this.” </p>
<p>Jaina laughed. A quiet, tired laugh but a real one, nonetheless. “Thank you for your help earlier. With Maiev.” </p>
<p>“No problem. She can be um...a bitch? That’s harsh. But true.” Valeera was already reclining her seat to further appreciate the rather short ride. </p>
<p>“Well. After you left she was much more amicable, so thank you. You said you were catching up with old friends? Did you work with Maiev at some point?” Jaina glanced up at the red light they were stalled at and then looked over at Valeera curiously. </p>
<p>“I lived there.” Valeera’s voice was soft. She didn’t really care what Jaina thought of her, so it was easy for her to admit that here in the confines of this car. “‘Til I wandered over to the bar one night when I didn’t make it back in time for curfew and Sylvanas let me stay. She gave me my first real job. Got my first apartment because of it.” </p>
<p>“Oh.” Jaina’s response was even quieter than Valeera’s explanation. “Thank you for sharing that with me. I had no idea.” </p>
<p>“She’s a really wonderful person.” Valeera continued, eyeing Jaina carefully. “I’ve never met anyone like her. I’m sure she’d be glad for you to stop in when you drop me off, by the way.  Let her know you didn’t get eaten alive.” </p>
<p>“I’ve faced worse than Maiev in every courtroom I’ve ever been in. And besides, at least her intentions are good.” Jaina realized she very much wanted to stop in. She just wasn’t sure if that want was due to the fact that the last thing she wanted to do was go home, or because she wanted to talk with someone who actually wanted to hear her talk.</p>
<p>Either way, she parked at the curb near the bar and got out of her car, and her face fell when she noticed how dark the bar was. At least until Sylvanas unlocked the door for Valeera and gave her a little wave. </p>
<p>“I just need to get my bag.” Valeera said to Jaina. “Come on.” </p>
<p>Jaina followed and gave Sylvanas an apologetic little smile. “I didn’t realize you were closed. I’d love to come by maybe later this week for a drink or two. Thank you for sending Valeera after me, by the way.” </p>
<p>“I didn’t send her.” Sylvanas responded as she held the door open. “She wanted to go. I just wasn’t inclined to stop her. She texted me you were on the way, by the way. I have a Manhattan waiting for you.” </p>
<p>Jaina looked past Sylvanas into the now dimly-lit bar and bit her lip for a moment before she laughed quietly and looked down at the space of sidewalk between them. “I, ah...I’m inclined to take you up on that, actually. Not quite ready to call it a night.” </p>
<p>“Then you’re more than welcome to come in. I’ll even have a drink with you, if you want.” </p>
<p>Valeera was already walking out past them, holding up Sylvanas’s keys in a silent request to borrow her car. Sylvanas nodded, and Valeera slipped away towards the alley Sylvanas parked her car in. </p>
<p>Jaina managed to give her a hasty goodbye, and Sylvanas laughed as she watched her go. </p>
<p>“Off to see that new girlfriend of hers, I think.” Sylvanas explained. “Ah, anyway...come in. It’s freezing out here.” </p>
<p>Jaina hadn’t even noticed until now that Sylvanas was shivering, and she immediately regretted keeping her out in the cold for so long. It was only right that she go inside, all things considered. </p>
<p>She found that she enjoyed taking her now-usual seat at the bar. But she found she enjoyed Sylvanas taking up the stool next to her even more. She had all the mixers at hand that she needed. It seemed Sylvanas liked a good gin and tonic, and Jaina could respect that. </p>
<p>What was more impactful, however, was the perfectly mixed Manhattan waiting for her in front of her stool on a coaster. </p>
<p>She tried her best to chase the memory of Arthas asking how she took her coffee out of her mind. As if sensing she was rather caught up in her thoughts, Sylvanas took a sip of her drink just to warm her throat before she spoke. </p>
<p>“How was Maiev, by the way? After Valeera warmed her up for you?” Sylvanas sounded tired. And Jaina felt almost too concerned by that fact. </p>
<p>“She was mostly fine. Valeera called her ‘Daddy’, by the way.” Jaina sounded more than a little amused by that fact. </p>
<p>And Sylvanas almost spat her drink everywhere. </p>
<p>“Sounds like Valeera.” Sylvanas said. “Did you find a client?” </p>
<p>“I did.” Jaina bit her lower lip and looked over at Sylvanas as she ran her thumb along the rim of her glass. “And I’m pretty sure I can help her.” </p>
<p>“If you’d ever like for me to look anything over with you, I...I’m more than well-acquainted with everything they’re dealing with. I’d be happy to.” </p>
<p>Jaina was quiet for a moment as she regarded Sylvanas. She even <i>looked</i> tired. Her hair wasn’t falling around her shoulders quite as perfectly as every other time Jaina had seen her. There was the faintest tinge of darkness under her eyes. But she’d still just offered to look at Jaina’s case with her. Jaina couldn’t remember the last time anyone had shown interest in her cases. Not that she’d needed the help. She’d learned to work independently a long time ago. </p>
<p>“That’s really kind of you.” Jaina took another sip of her drink. It was just as wonderful as it had been every other time. “...You seem tired.” </p>
<p>“I am. Long day.” The chuckle that came along with Sylvanas’s response was a little raspy, and she leaned an elbow against the bar as she fiddled with the straw in her drink. “But I wanted to see you.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas breathed out heavily as her eyes shut and she shook her head. “That came out weird. I just mean last time you were here, I could tell you were upset the minute you walked in. I hate to see good people hurting.” </p>
<p>“How do you know I’m a good person?” Jaina asked as she looked - really looked - at Sylvanas in what little light was left on in the bar. At the gentle glow of her eyes and the delicate arch of her brow as Sylvanas mirrored that look right back at her. </p>
<p>“Because I swear I’ve met a hundred bad people for every good one. I learned how to spot those a long time ago. I had to.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“When you did social work, I’m assuming?” Jaina asked, leaning one of her own elbows down so she could face Sylvanas more easily. </p>
<p>“Yeah.” Sylvanas took another sip of her drink, then. Like there was a taste in her mouth that she didn’t like. “Yeah, that was...that was something I kind of had no choice but to learn how to do, you know?” </p>
<p>“Yeah.” Jaina’s voice was soft and sympathetic. “Yeah, I’ve definitely had those moments. I’ve helped so many people that didn’t deserve it. I’ve fucked over every single person on the other end of those deals. Maybe that’s why I’m doing what I’m doing. I try to tell myself that isn’t it. That it’s because that’s what I always wanted to do, because it was…” </p>
<p>“Jaina, everyone has to make a living.” Sylvanas chided gently, but her tone was utterly lacking in condescension. It was all comfort and warmth. “And you’re doing everything that you can, now.” </p>
<p>“You know it’s funny, I...the talks that we’ve had, even as few as they’ve been, I’m fairly certain they’re the least superficial things I’ve experienced in a long time.” Jaina took a rather heavier sip of her drink, then, and stopped looking at Sylvanas. It was almost too much to see the expression she was wearing.  “I mean, you must know why I’m here, right?” </p>
<p>“I could guess.” Sylvanas offered. “I could guess that things aren’t good at home. That you don’t feel heard, and that I’m actually listening. I could easily guess that you’re here to be heard. That maybe you need a friend, because everyone could use a friend. Even lawyers. Even bartenders.” </p>
<p>“Are you a friend, then?” Jaina asked, almost looking at her - but not quite. </p>
<p>“I’d like to be.” Sylvanas’s voice was so soft. So gentle. It made Jaina’s heart ache. </p>
<p>It made her glance down at the ring on her finger and nudge at it with her thumb before she finished off her drink. </p>
<p>“Might be nice.” Jaina agreed, placing her glass down and turning all the way on her stool so she was facing the other woman. “I should probably get home.” </p>
<p>“Can I give you my number?” Sylvanas asked as she took Jaina’s empty glass and stood, leaning to place it behind the bar. “Friends do that, I think. Exchange numbers. Talk from time to time. Do they still go out for mimosas or am I extremely out of touch?” </p>
<p>Jaina broke out into a laugh unlike one Sylvanas had yet heard from her, and she couldn’t even pretend to be hurt by it. </p>
<p>It was lovely. </p>
<p>“I’m guessing I’m out of touch.” </p>
<p>“No, no.” Jaina said as she stood and shouldered her bag. “Friends still do that as far as I know. It was just the thought of you actually enjoying a mimosa that got me.” </p>
<p>“I can enjoy mimosas.” Sylvanas said reproachfully, all while wearing a rather sly smile. “I own more clothes than torn-up jeans and old leather boots. I clean up nice.”  </p>
<p>“Yeah, then. Yeah. Mimosas or something, sometime.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas had already written her number down on a napkin and passed it to Jaina by the time Jaina finished formulating a response. </p>
<p>“Good.” Sylvanas responded. “Good, but be sure to text me, sometime. Any time.” </p>
<p>Jaina looked down at the number and tucked it inside the front of her jacket as she nodded. </p>
<p>“I’ll listen.” </p>
<p>Jaina’s gaze lifted, then, to find Sylvanas looking almost unsure. As though she were concerned that offer was too much. That it meant too much. That Jaina might take it the wrong way. </p>
<p>Or maybe that she wanted her to. </p>
<p>But it wasn’t an offer Jaina was in any place to refuse. </p>
<p>“Then I’ll talk.” Jaina said simply, and she watched the tension melt away from the tired woman in front of her. </p>
<p>Jaina didn’t mind the torn jeans or the boots or the tanktop, really. For reasons she wouldn’t let herself analyze. She cared much more about other things. Like the prospect of having a real friend.  Having someone who would look at her, instead of through her. Like how she was looking at her right now. Smiling at her in a soft, appreciative way. </p>
<p>“Good.” Sylvanas said, turning to grab her keys from behind the bar as though she’d suddenly snapped out of some sort of trance. “I’ll walk you to your car, yeah? Things can get sketchy around here this late at night.” </p>
<p>They didn’t say anything else on the short walk. </p>
<p>Jaina wasn’t sure if friends opened car doors for friends, or not. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had a friend, really. </p>
<p>But Sylvanas did. She made sure Jaina’s jacket made its way inside the car as she held the upper edge of the door, too. </p>
<p>“I’ll see you around, yeah?” </p>
<p>Jaina nodded as she pushed the button to start the car, and Sylvanas shut her door for her. </p>
<p>And they went their separate ways. </p>
<p>Jaina - to the couch in her too-big, yet empty house so that she wouldn’t wake Arthas. Because she felt a little better for the first time in a long while. A little alive. And she wanted to fall asleep that way. She wanted to hold onto that feeling for a little while longer. </p>
<p>And Sylvanas - to her loft, a bottle of gin in hand. The gin always helped her sleep at night, and she was exhausted. And Sylvanas, unlike Jaina, wasn't really in the mood to feel much of anything that night. She never was when she was alone. So she tried to avoid being sober and alone as much as possible.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Say Something</h2></a>
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  <p>
    <i>And I... am feeling so small</i><br/>
<i>It was over my head</i><br/>
<i>I know nothing at all</i><br/>
<i>Say something, I'm giving up on you</i><br/>
<i>I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you</i><br/>
<i>Anywhere I would've followed you</i><br/>
<i>Say something, I'm giving up on you</i>
  </p>
</div>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><i>“Jaina?” </i><br/><p>
<i>Jaina smiled softly as she looked up at Arthas from across her desk. She smiled even wider when she saw the flowers in his hand. </i><br/>

</p><p>
  <i>“You’re not supposed to be here.” She admonished gently as she placed her pencil down and got up from her chair to take the flowers from him and wrap her arms around his broad back. He knew better. They both did. Harvard Yard was rather strict about things like this, and they were only first-year students, after all. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I know.” He murmured into her hair before lifting a hand to the back of her head to keep her close. “Just wanted to wish you luck on the exam tomorrow.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I’m already lucky,” Jaina whispered into his chest before leaning back to look at him. “You’re so sweet, do you know that?” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Arthas gave her a crooked little smile and turned his head to kiss the palm of her hand as it came up to cradle his cheek. “I try.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You’re doing great,” Jaina responded with a quiet laugh before pulling him down into a quick kiss. “Now get out of here before you get us both in trouble.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Okay.” Arthas was laughing a little too, now, as Jaina gave him a gentle, playful shove. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”</i>
</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>“Arthas? Can we talk?”<p>Arthas looked up from the screen of his computer in Jaina’s direction, but only for a moment. “Can it wait?”</p>
<p>“No,” Jaina responded simply. “I'll be in the living room.”</p>
<p>To his credit, Arthas walked in just a few minutes later - looking at Jaina warily as he sat down on the armchair nearest the sofa his wife was already inhabiting.</p>
<p>“Is this about the dinner?” He asked, his voice a little gruff - but no more than usual.</p>
<p>Jaina sighed and looked down at her hands which were rested in her lap. She'd folded herself up on the couch while she waited. Thinking. About…</p>
<p>“Everything, Arthas. It's about everything. It's about every dinner. It's about us. Our marriage. I feel as though it's all falling apart and I'm the only one that can see it happening. It makes me feel crazy.” Jaina’s voice was quiet and measured. Careful.</p>
<p>“I don't understand, if I'm being entirely honest. We have an amazing life. An amazing house. Money.” He lifted a hand in the air in a visible display of his confusion before letting it drop back down against the arm of his chair.</p>
<p>“That's the biggest problem, I think. Those are all the things you ever wanted. And we got lost somewhere in there. <i>I</i> got lost somewhere in there.” Jaina only looked at him for a moment to find he was looking anywhere but at her. “You can't even look at me when we talk, anymore.”</p>
<p>Her voice had gone even softer.</p>
<p>“You don't even look at me when we fuck.” </p>
<p>That got his attention. And the flush in his face told Jaina she'd struck a nerve she hadn't really been meaning to strike.</p>
<p>“How would you know?” He asked, bitterness dripping from every word. “You act as though that's a regular occurrence.”</p>
<p>Jaina almost bit back with twice the venom he'd tried to inject into those words, but she managed not to. Somehow.</p>
<p>“Why would I want to, Arthas? Really? The way you treat me...the fact that you don't pay any attention to me unless you're trying to get in my pants...why would I want to?”</p>
<p>“Because all of that is in your head, and because you're my wife. I pay you plenty of attention, Jaina. I made you coffee yesterday morning if you'll recall.” </p>
<p>“Oh, the coffee.” Jaina swallowed thickly past the lump in her throat and then breathed out sharply through her nose in an almost-laugh. “Right.”</p>
<p>“What?” Arthas demanded, sitting forward in his chair in a way that made Jaina’s eyes darken slightly. “Can I not do that right, either? Can you tell me one thing that I do right?”</p>
<p>Jaina couldn't answer that, and Arthas didn't need to hear that answer even if she could've managed to get one out. </p>
<p>“I think we should see a counselor.” Jaina continued, folding her legs further under herself and leaning into the corner of the sofa. “I think we need to.”</p>
<p>“Bullshit, Jaina. We don't need to see anyone. You need to get out of whatever ridiculous anti-fantasy you've created for yourself in regards to us and realize most people would kill for what we have.” </p>
<p>Jaina looked at him hard, then. And she stayed quiet for a while as she measured her words before replying. “I need it, then.” She said, a faint tremor in her voice. “I need it because I can't do this anymore, otherwise.” </p>
<p>Arthas stood from the chair so quickly Jaina’s brow furrowed as she experienced her own bout of confusion.</p>
<p>“Then go see a counselor.” His voice was almost emotionless aside from a tinge of anger. “I have better things to do with my time.” </p>
<p>He was already heading to grab his keys from the mantle of their fireplace and making his way towards the door the next time he said anything.</p>
<p>“And I'm gonna pretend that wasn't as much of a threat as it sounded like.” </p>
<p>The door slammed shut before Jaina could say anything else. Not that she could have anyway. She was too busy dealing with the tears that burned her eyes and the bitter sobs that wanted desperately to claw their way out of her chest.</p>
<p>In the end, only a few tears ended up sliding down her cheeks once Arthas was gone before she pushed it all back down desperately and cursed under her breath. She spent a long while curled up on her side on the sofa with her face pressed firmly into one of the throw pillows adorning it.</p>
<p>She wanted so badly to run, right then. Like she had so many times before.</p>
<p>But she would stay, and she knew it. Out of fear. Out of obligation. Any number of reasons.</p>
<p>Reasons that were now threatening to eat her alive. </p>
<p>Perhaps out of desperation, she shoved herself from the couch and paced back and forth across the living room with her hands running through her own hair before she finally went to retrieve her phone from the coffee table.</p>
<p>For a while, she stared at her mother's contact page - her thumbs hovering over the various options she had at her disposal to reach out to her. And in the end, she chose none of them. </p>
<p>In the end, she scrolled to the newest addition on the list and shot off a quick text. Maybe what she needed right now was a friend, instead of her mother’s endless questions and worry and thinly-veiled desire for Jaina to stay. </p>
<p>
  <i>Hey. It's Jaina. I know it's Sunday and you're probably catching up on some well-deserved rest. I hope this doesn't wake you.</i>
</p>
<p><i><b>Not at all. Early bird gets the worm. Nice to hear from you.</b></i> </p>
<p>Sylvanas was actually still struggling to focus her vision - tangled up in her blankets, her hair an absolute disaster. But Jaina didn't need to know that.</p>
<p>
  <i>Were you serious about mimosas?</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>Dead serious. Mimosas are no laughing matter, Jaina.</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>Jaina laughed. She actually laughed. She was rather shocked that that was even a remote possibility right then.</p>
<p>
  <i>Okay. Well today is definitely one of those days that I could use a friend.</i>
</p>
<p>Sylvanas was sitting up in bed now, the blankets having fallen from her bare upper body to pool around her waist as she pushed some of the mess that was her hair from her eyes so she could actually read the screen of her phone without struggling.</p>
<p><i><b>I'm there then, don't worry. Wherever you want to meet. Are you okay?</b></i> </p>
<p>Jaina looked at that message for a long time. Probably too long, before she finally typed back.</p>
<p>
  <i>Not really. But I'll make it. Can you be at the cafe on the corner of Piedmont and 2nd in like an hour?</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>Absolutely. I'll see you there.</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>While Jaina had been up since six, and only needed to freshen her slightly-ruined makeup - Sylvanas was in an absolute panic as she showered and the rummaged, still mostly wet, through her clothes.</p>
<p>She had a hairdryer going even as she attempted to fasten her bra one-handed, and both efforts turned out rather disastrous.</p>
<p>In the end, though, she pulled it together somehow. She was pleasantly surprised to find her car already returned to its place in the alley with the keys hidden where Valeera usually stashed them.</p>
<p>She had also located a pair of her nice boots. An expensive pair of burnished brown ones with toe caps that actually laced. Aside from that, and as promised, jeans without holes in them and a button-up flannel over which she threw an old, trusty black pea coat.</p>
<p>She'd even managed to get her hair in order. Nothing special. Just the usual gentle waves it somehow magically settled into. </p>
<p>Still, she was about five minutes late.</p>
<p>And she nearly lept from her car when she found a place to park and saw Jaina standing outside waiting for her in the cold.</p>
<p>“Hey! Hey, I'm sorry!” She was so genuinely apologetic that Jaina really couldn't help but smile. And the way her ears were pressed almost impossibly far back was, well, rather precious. Even if Jaina understood little of what those gestures meant - this one, at least, was easy to read.</p>
<p>“Your clock must be off.” Jaina responded as she flashed Sylvanas her phone.</p>
<p>Five minutes early. Not five minutes late.</p>
<p>Nice, Sylvanas. Way to go.</p>
<p>“Oh. I…yeah, I should check the clock in my car, probably.” Her response was a little fumbled. A little flustered.</p>
<p>“...You were sleeping when I texted you, weren't you?” Jaina’s accusation came gently, and with a half-smile that made it easy for Sylvanas to shrug and answer truthfully. Mostly.</p>
<p>“A little.” </p>
<p>“You were a little asleep?” Jaina asked, rather shocked about it behind her amusement. She looked like she’d taken the entire hour just to do her hair, much less everything else. “You really do clean up nice.” </p>
<p>“Thanks.” Sylvanas took the bone being offered to her gladly, and followed Jaina into the little cafe - more than happy to get in out of the cold. </p>
<p>They were sitting across from each other a short while later, and Jaina was recommending various things on the menu all while Sylvanas watched and listened quietly.</p>
<p>She seemed almost frantic in her talk of hollandaise and in-house donuts in a way that Sylvanas saw right through. But she let it ride until they ordered and had their first round of mimosas in front of them. Sylvanas actually really liked them, truth be told. </p>
<p>“Thanks for the rec, by the way. I haven’t had eggs benedict in a while.” Sylvanas remarked after taking a sip of her drink. </p>
<p>“It’s...not a problem. I’m talking your ear off. I’m sorry.” Jaina’s jaw clenched as she looked down at the table and drummed her fingertips against the white cloth that was covering it. </p>
<p>“Don’t be sorry,” Sylvanas reassured quickly. “Just...what is it that you’d rather be saying?” </p>
<p>“What do you mean?” Jaina asked with a questioning wrinkle of her brow. Even if she already knew.</p>
<p>Sylvanas breathed a laugh and looked down at the table as she splayed her fingers in the air before placing her hands on either side of her drink. “Only that usually when people talk a lot about something that they likely don't find terribly interesting it's usually because they don't want what's really on their mind to come out. That they can fill the space with things that aren't...that. I'm assuming whatever it was that had you feeling off this morning?”</p>
<p>“Am I talking to a friend or a former social worker?” Jaina asked as she leaned back in her chair with her mimosa in her hand and regarded Sylvanas carefully.</p>
<p>“Both, maybe,” Sylvanas responded with a slight twitch of her ears. “Mostly a friend. Maybe the other bit comes out when I'm concerned.” </p>
<p>Jaina nodded and looked down at the unnaturally orange liquid in her high-stemmed glass before placing it back down without ever taking another sip of it. </p>
<p>“I think it's a lot. I think it's too much to unload on a rather new friendship. You don't need a laundry list of my personal problems dropped into your lap the first time we see each other outside of the bar, I don't think. You don't need to be concerned about me. Really. I don't think I'm going through anything that a million other people aren't going through at this exact moment in time.”</p>
<p>“Well, I can't be friends with a million people, Jaina. But I can be friends with you.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s smile was so sly and charming that it made Jaina chuckle from across the table. </p>
<p>“I guess the former would be rather difficult,” Jaina said, sighing quietly to gather her thoughts before she continued. “Things are just hard, right now. In general, I guess. But especially at home. It's not as though that much isn't easy to guess considering the fact that you're more than well-aware of my late-night habits as of late.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas offered a much different smile this time. Perhaps a mixture of sympathy and appreciation. Jaina couldn't tell. It wasn't an expression she was used to seeing.</p>
<p>“It's never that simple, though. I could say that about anyone who comes into the bar alone. I could make wild assumptions about what they're going through and why they're there. I try my best not to, or I would probably drive myself crazy.” </p>
<p>“Why me, then?” Jaina asked - ever looking for the ulterior. The reasons behind the smiles. Behind the kindness. Arthas had taught her so much over the years.</p>
<p>“I don't know,” Sylvanas responded, an almost pensive look crossing her features as she really pondered that question for a moment or two. “I...I think maybe it's because nobody who is trying to do good deserves to walk into a place looking the way you did the other night. But the world is like that. It always shits on the people who are trying to do good things. Always.”</p>
<p>“Is that what happened to you?” Jaina’s question was so quiet, Sylvanas might not have heard it were she not an elf. But the arrival of their food saved her from having to scramble for an answer right away.</p>
<p>The waiter wasn't at their table nearly long enough to be much help, however. </p>
<p>“Am I talking to a lawyer or a friend?” Sylvanas finally asked with a lift of one of her long, delicate eyebrows in Jaina’s direction.</p>
<p>Jaina smiled and scrunched her nose before looking down at her bagel and lox. “Touché. A friend, probably? Definitely a lawyer. No shaking that one.”</p>
<p>“In that case, objection, badgering the witness, your honor.” Sylvanas said to her plate as she cut open the yolk of her egg with a smirk.</p>
<p>“Is the Honorable Judge poached nicely?” Jaina asked, cutting a slice of her bagel and eyeing Sylvanas's esteemed breakfast curiously. </p>
<p>“Quite, counsellor.” Sylvanas said before popping a bite into her mouth and hazarding a glance in Jaina’s direction. At least she looked amused.</p>
<p>“You sound as though you've been in no too few courtrooms, yourself,” Jaina observed. “I suppose it came with the territory of the work you did before the bar.”</p>
<p>“Too many. I just gave myself flashbacks of when I forced myself into heels and pantsuits on a weekly basis.”</p>
<p>“Oh, you poor thing. I can't even imagine the torment.” Jaina feigned a pout that was more than a little convincing. A pout that left Sylvanas with little choice but to laugh at herself. </p>
<p>“You're mean.” Sylvanas accused good-naturedly. Her breakfast was fucking delicious. She couldn't remember the last time she'd treated herself to something like this.</p>
<p>“Only in the courtroom. Would you like to adjourn?” Jaina’s own was good. Oddly so, actually. It'd been a while since she'd felt anything close to an appetite, but she was actually enjoying this.</p>
<p>“Please. I’m not sure I'll survive another round of questioning.” </p>
<p>“Adjourned, then. It's your turn.” Jaina offered after another bite of food. “Ask me a question. Fair is fair.”</p>
<p>“Alright. Where did you go to school?” Sylvanas had already eaten over half of her own breakfast. It turned out eggs benedict was an excellent hangover cure. Her lingering headache was already all but forgotten.</p>
<p>“Law school?” </p>
<p>Sylvanas nodded.</p>
<p>“Harvard.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas’s brows shot up and Jaina laughed hard enough that she was glad she didn't currently have any food in her mouth.</p>
<p>“Don't look at me like that. It's just a school like any other. Where did you go to school?”</p>
<p>“U of C.” Sylvanas said it like it was nothing while Jaina paused in her eating. “Master of Social Welfare.” </p>
<p>“Berkeley?” Jaina asked - sounding equally as surprised as Sylvanas had looked.</p>
<p>Sylvanas nodded without looking up from the food she was now taking a rather odd amount of time to cut up into individual bites. </p>
<p>“That's very impressive.” Jaina finally said once she recovered enough to continue a normal conversation. “You're a long way from California.”</p>
<p>“You're a long way from Massachusetts.” Sylvanas countered, finally looking up at Jaina as she gave up on butchering the last of her breakfast to finish the rest of her drink, instead. </p>
<p>“Your cross-examination is lethal, Sylvanas. Have you ever considered law school?”</p>
<p>“Fuck, no.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s quick-witted answer came, and the half-sip of mimosa in Jaina’s mouth made its way out into the napkin she somehow managed to grab just in time to stop herself from looking like an absolute heathen as she sputtered indignantly and then laughed hard enough to bring some rather unwanted attention to herself from other nearby brunch-goers. </p>
<p>Sylvanas found the entire thing hilarious, even if Jaina’s cheeks were the color of beets by the time she reigned herself back in. </p>
<p>“Shit, I'm sorry,” Jaina said in a whisper as she removed her glasses long enough to dab at her eyes. “I needed that laugh.”</p>
<p>“Then don't be sorry,” Sylvanas said easily, leaning back and crossing her legs beneath the table after she finally finished off her food. “It's okay to laugh. I won't tell anyone, I swear.” </p>
<p>It was okay to laugh. </p>
<p>It <i>felt</i> okay to laugh, too. </p>
<p>Jaina realized almost too suddenly that she was enjoying herself. Really enjoying herself. </p>
<p>And she didn’t stop herself, either. She had a couple more mimosas and chatted with Sylvanas about bear night and the sock hop that was coming up in a couple of weeks. </p>
<p>She even talked about her new client. No specifics, of course. Just lose details of the case. And Sylvanas didn’t pry, because she understood. </p>
<p>But god, she listened. So well. To every single word. </p>
<p>And after brunch, Jaina was still smiling all the way to her office at the firm where she had a few things to review for court on Monday. </p>
<p>She was in such a good mood, in fact, that she almost felt bad for everything that had happened with Arthas earlier even after hours of pouring over manuscripts and statements. </p>
<p>Perhaps she was looking at things in a different light.</p>
<p>Or perhaps she was being too forgiving. </p>
<p>She wasn’t sure. </p>
<p>All she knew was that her mood was shattered the moment she walked in to find her house an utter disaster zone. </p>
<p>She’d forgotten all about Arthas’s plans for the game this weekend. She’d forgotten that he’d invited all the junior partners over. </p>
<p>She’d forgotten she would be cleaning up beer cans and pizza crust while he lay on the couch asleep with his shirt riding up his belly. </p>
<p>It only took half an hour or so before everything was restored to some sense of normalcy, and she sat down slowly on the edge of the couch with her lower back against Arthas’s side. </p>
<p>He shifted faintly in his sleep as Jaina stared ahead at the muted commercial on the TV mounted above their fireplace. </p>
<p>“I had a nice day today.” She whispered, to no one.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><i>“We’re gonna figure it out, baby. I promise we are.” </i><p>
  <i>Arthas pressed his face harder into the crook of her neck. She’d won her first case that morning. Arthas had failed his bar exam that afternoon. She figured it might be best not to bring up her case. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I can help you, you know. I can help you study for the next one, and you’ll get it. You’ll get it next time.” She was stroking his hair. His shoulders. Anything she could reach, really. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>And he pulled away from her with a suddenness she hadn’t been expecting, leaving her on the edge of the bed staring after him with worry in her eyes. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I don’t need your help, Jaina. Somebody has it out for me or something. I could pass that bullshit with my eyes closed.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>He was pacing back and forth across their bedroom in a way that made Jaina feel so small. So helpless. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Arthas, I’m so sorry.” She whispered - a little breathless as her eyes glistened with unshed tears. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“No, the fuck you aren’t. You’re too busy trying to make partner to care about me passing this shit. Don’t even tell me that isn’t true. If it was, you’d have been with me instead of in court, today.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Jaina’s lips parted and shut again as she brought a hand up quickly to wipe a tear that slipped down her cheek - leaving a searing trail in its wake. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“That isn’t true.” Jaina breathed. “It isn’t like I can sit in while you take the bar. Don’t be ridiculous. I was there when you got out.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Yeah,” Arthas muttered, finally heading over to the dresser where he tossed his dress shirt on the floor in a crumpled heap so he could change into a v-neck from the top drawer. “Yeah, I’m the ridiculous one - and you’re sitting on the bed crying when <i>I’m</i> the one dealing with this shit right now.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Jaina was shocked. Utterly silent as she sat there drawing her knees up to her chest. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Congratulations on your case, by the way.” He said as he snatched his keys up and slipped them into his pocket on his way towards the bedroom door. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>He didn’t really slam it. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Yet, Jaina felt the sound in her fucking bones. Even the latch of the doorknob had been deafening.</i>
</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Tell Me It's Okay</h2></a>
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    <i>But something had to give</i><br/>
<i>I had to finally see the light</i><br/>
<i>I think at 23</i><br/>
<i>It's time to practice what I preach</i><br/>
<i>And what I preach is</i><br/>
<i>Tell me it's okay, to be happy now</i><br/>
<i>Because I'm happy now</i>
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</div>Valeera smiled over at Tess when she noticed she was being looked at, and glanced down quickly at the hand that moved across the center console to take hold of her own gently.<p>“You're too good,” Valeera whispered with a gentle shake of her head as Tess ran her thumb slowly across Valeera’s knuckles. “Thank you for dinner, by the way.”</p><p>It had been absolutely out of this world. Tess had driven her out of town to one of those restaurants they talk about in magazines. The type you needed to know people in order to get a reservation at.</p><p>“No,” Tess responded simply as she leaned her turned head against the driver’s seat headrest so she could look at Valeera a little easier. “Don't thank me for dinner. I should be thanking you for letting me drag you all the way out here.”</p><p>Valeera scoffed at Tess's sly smile, and she decided she'd lean her head back, too. “Do you know why I asked you for your number that night at the bar?” Valeera wasn't looking at her, anymore. She was smiling up at the roof of the car. “I never ask for numbers, by the way. It was your accent.”</p><p>“I know,” Tess said, much to Valeera's surprise. “And I'm glad you like it. I can't do much about it, love.”</p><p>Valeera’s expression grew more thoughtful as she twined her fingers with Tess’s. “Like that.” She said quietly. “When you call me that.”</p><p>Tess guided Valeera’s hand up to her lips to place a kiss against the back of it in response. “Should I be taking you home now?”</p><p>Tess’s lips were still hovering very near the backs of Valeera’s fingers. She shook her head without much hesitation.</p><p>“Your place or mine?”</p><p>“Yours.”</p><p>“Always mine.”</p><p>It was such a sudden, unexpected statement that Valeera’s attention snapped over to her just as quickly as it had left Tess’s dark-painted lips. </p><p>“It's okay.” Tess said with a soft smile, still holding Valeera’s hand as she awkwardly got her car started with the other.</p><p>Valeera was still watching her as she pulled out of the parking garage and turned onto the road that would take them to the highway and back to their little town. </p><p>“Is it really?” Valeera finally asked, genuine curiosity and maybe a little concern in her voice.</p><p>“We don't have to share every facet of each other's lives in order to enjoy the parts that we do, love. I don't mind. When you're ready for more, I've no doubt you'll tell me that you are.” </p><p>Valeera looked away, then. It felt strange, suddenly, holding Tess’s hand like this. Valeera wasn't sure if it was because she was convincing herself it was childish or because she'd already convinced herself long ago that there were certain things she just wasn't worth.</p><p>There was a long span of silence before Tess finally tried to chip away at the ice again.</p><p>“I told you I liked your laugh.” Tess began, and Valeera hummed her acknowledgment as she looked out the passenger window.</p><p>“I like the way you carry yourself, too. Like you have something to prove to everyone else around you, even though you act as though you don't owe anyone anything. There's something intangible and confounding and magnetic about it all. About you. It's difficult sometimes to stop myself wanting to know more, because I want it so terribly. So selfishly.” </p><p>“You like the mystery, then?” Valeera asked, her eyes now focused on Tess’s face as street lights illuminated it and then allowed it to fall into darkness again. It had sounded like an accusation, as gentle as it had been. And maybe it was.</p><p>“No,” Tess responded as she released Valeera’s hand to stroke along her forearm. “I just find myself wanting what's behind it.”</p><p>“You sound so sure.” Valeera breathed as Tess’s touches drove her to the point of distraction, even as innocent and soft as they were.</p><p>“No one is ever sure.” Tess countered. “About anything, I think. What I am sure of is that I enjoy having you in my bed. And that I enjoy each text you send me, however few. And that whatever you choose to give to me is absolutely desired.” </p><p>Valeera let out a breathy noise. A laugh, Tess realized as she glanced over. One that brought a little curve of a smile to her own lips.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You're just really hot. I think I might have to have sex with you or something.” </p><p>Tess chuckled, then. A low, soothing sound that came from her chest that made Valeera want to be closer to her. “Is that so? Could I be so lucky?” </p><p>As though they hadn’t had sex every time they’d been together. </p><p>“I think so.” Valeera murmured, her eyes cutting sideways again when Tess’s hand moved to rest along her inner thigh. “But if you keep all this up you’re going to have to pull over at the next motel.” </p><p>Tess moved her hand towards Valeera’s knee instead. “You can take a nap if you’d like, you know. While we drive.” </p><p>Valeera mused for a moment over how she probably wouldn’t normally do that. How she would likely only do that with Sylvanas on their way to a new supplier or event planner. </p><p>In the end, she just rested her hand over Tess’s warmly and began to recline her seat. </p><p>“Will you wake me up about ten minutes before we get to your place?” Valeera asked as she slowly pulled her hand away from Tess’s and tucked both her arms inside her shirt, prompting Tess to turn up the heater a little more despite the fact that she was amply warm. “I don’t like waking up not knowing where I am, y’know. Like if the car’s already stopped, I mean. It…”</p><p>Valeera trailed off and Tess glanced at her as she lifted a hand to brush the backs of her fingers down Valeera’s cheek.</p><p>“‘Course I’ll wake you. No surprises. Jotting it down just now.”</p><p>Valeera turned her face towards Tess’s hand and pressed close enough to kiss her palm before she hunkered down in the seat, curled on her side facing Tess. </p><p>Now and then, a pothole or exit would threaten to wake her, and Tess’s hand was in her hair - her fingertips stroking her scalp gently. </p><p>True to her word, though, Tess reached for Valeera’s hand once they got to town and gave it a soft squeeze. </p><p>“We’re almost there, Valeera.” </p><p>Valeera made a soft noise as her eyes opened and focused more quickly than Tess would’ve expected. A moment later and the seat was upright again and Valeera was running her hands through her own impossibly long hair as she pulled it up into a messy, loose bun. </p><p>“Thank you. For waking me, I mean. That was really nice. It isn’t something I’ve gotten much chance to do.” </p><p>“Car rides are good for naps.” Tess agreed amicably as the hand that had been near Valeera for the duration of the ride moved to join the other on the steering wheel. </p><p>They were. They really were. </p><p>Valeera recalled a few car ride naps with her last foster family. The one she’d tried her hardest with. She remembered the feeling of security she found in the sound of the road passing beneath the tires. She remembered, too, the feeling of finding out she was on her own the day she turned eighteen. </p><p>The car pulled to a stop in Tess’s garage, and Valeera was still staring at the dashboard in front of her. </p><p>Tess pressed her lips together as she shut off the ignition and pushed the button to close the garage door. </p><p>“Something on your mind?” Tess asked without looking over. </p><p>“Can we go inside?” Valeera asked quickly, and Tess responded by getting out of the car and heading for the door that led through the utility room and into the living room. She didn’t bother going to Valeera’s door first. Valeera was right behind her. </p><p>The moment the door shut, though, Valeera’s hands were on her arms pulling them around herself and Tess was complying easily - even tilting her head to the side when Valeera’s face pressing into the crook of her neck turned into kisses and nips. </p><p>“What’s wrong?” Tess asked as she blindly tried to hang her keys on the hook by the door. </p><p>“Nothing.” Valeera lied against Tess’s jaw as her hands rode up underneath the other woman’s shirt to trace the underside of her ribcage and back down along the softness of her stomach. Tess was getting a little breathless by the time Valeera backed her against the washing machine.</p><p>“I understand.” Tess responded as she tugged Valeera gainst herself hard with a firm grip on her hips. Close enough that Valeera’s hands had to stop their rather frenzied attention. </p><p>“What?” Valeera asked in breathless confusion as she looked up at Tess with furrowed brows. </p><p>“I said I understand. But if you want me to fuck you right now, please let me take you to my bedroom first.” </p><p>Valeera bit her lower lip and shook her head faintly as she pulled away. </p><p>“You don’t have to do that.” She breathed as she ran her hand over her own face. “Humor me. You don’t have to.” </p><p>“Hey.” Tess bridged the distance Valeera had put between them and reached out to take Valeera’s hands into her own, pulling them slowly around her own back in a mirror of what Valeera had done to her earlier. “Don’t do that, love. I’ve not done a single thing just to humor you. Not a single thing. I wouldn’t.” </p><p>Valeera tried her best to take even breaths. She tried her best not to look for reasons where there weren’t any. Because there weren’t. This could be a damn good thing, and she knew it. She knew it. </p><p>“Yeah,” Valeera sounded frustrated, but Tess knew it wasn’t directed towards her. She was intuitive enough to pick up that much. “Yeah, I’m working on knowing that.” </p><p>Tess stayed close as Valeera’s hands finally splayed out against her lower back where her shirt was still lifted. </p><p>“Whatever you want tonight is what I’ll do,” Tess responded, tilting Valeera’s chin up to brush their lips together in an almost-kiss before she kept talking. “If you want me to take you to bed, I will. No matter what you want to do when we get there. If you want me to take you home, I can do that, too. No matter where it is. No matter where you want me to drop you off.” </p><p>Valeera dug her nails into the skin of Tess’s back ever so slightly. </p><p>“I don’t wanna go home.” Valeera breathed with a sigh. “I want to be distracted, and you’re really fucking good at that.” </p><p>“I appreciate honesty,” Tess whispered against Valeera’s lips before finally giving her a slightly deeper kiss. One that had Valeera’s lips parting and Tess’s tongue teasing at her own for a beat or two before Tess gave her upper arms a little squeeze. “And honestly, I don’t have a problem distracting you. But let me do it on my terms tonight, hm?” </p><p>“Please do.” Valeera somehow managed to sound something between alluring and literal. </p><p>Tess finally pulled back, but only enough to take one of Valeera’s hands in her own and walk through the mostly dark house towards the bedroom. The first time they’d slept together, Tess had found it odd that Valeera shut the door considering they were alone. </p><p>Tonight, Tess shut it before she had to. Valeera noticed, of course. </p><p>Valeera noticed everything about everyone. Always. </p><p>Ever since she was little. </p><p>“That was sweet of you.” Valeera observed, her eyes trailing from the closed door to Tess - who was looking intently into the green glow she was met with. </p><p>“That’s how you like it to be.” Tess responded simply. Without asking why. Without looking at her with any measure of distaste or confusion. </p><p>“Fuck, this is gonna be a problem.” Valeera observed with a quiet laugh. </p><p>“Then don’t let it be a problem,” Tess said as she slowly pulled her own shirt off over her head and tossed it in the general direction of the hamper next to her dresser. She drew one of Valeera’s hands towards her chest and Valeera stroked slowly across the pale, soft skin towards one of the straps of her bra. “Just let it be.” </p><p>“That’s a Beatles song,” Valeera asked as her hand slowly moved towards Tess’s back to unclip her bra with a level of ease that the other woman was still impressed with. And even as she rather smoothly slid the material down Tess’s arms towards the floor, she smirked. “Your neck of the woods, yeah?” </p><p>Tess let out a breathy sound of amusement and lifted Valeera up against herself with a suddenness that had the other woman wrapping her legs around Tess’s waist out of fear she would fall. </p><p>“My terms tonight, remember?” Tess reminded gently as she walked towards the bed and moved over the end of it to lay Valeera down beneath herself. </p><p>“How could I forget?” Valeera asked in an almost-purr. </p><p>“Can I ask you something personal, Valeera?” </p><p>“Mmm…” </p><p>Tess smirked at the utter lack of amusement in Valeera’s voice.</p><p>“How would you feel about my wearing a harness?” Tess’s voice was low against Valeera’s ear, and her chest heaved with a sudden sharp exhale. “You’d like that, then?” Tess continued, stroking along Valeera’s thighs with her hands and pressing her thumbs into the hollows of her hips through her jeans. “Hm?”</p><p>“Fuck, yes. If it wasn’t obvious.” </p><p>“A bit, perhaps,” Tess admitted as she reached for the side table and fumbled with the drawer while Valeera began working on getting her own clothing off. </p><p>Tess might have stopped her so that she could undress her, herself, were she not unusually hot and bothered and trying to kick her own jeans off as she stood beside the bed, the harness she’d reached for clinking softly in one of her hands. </p><p>Valeera was quick about her own clothes. Quick enough that she was sitting on the edge of the bed reaching for Tess’s thighs by the time she was making last-minute harness adjustments. </p><p>“Haven’t put it on in a while.” Tess explained with a faint smile as her fingertips came up to rest along the sides of Valeera’s face. </p><p>“I don’t mind,” Valeera responded, wrapping her hand around the base of the toy Tess had snapped into place and giving it a testing tug. “Looks good on you.” </p><p>Tess snorted softly and moved Valeera back onto the bed along with herself, falling into place against her easily and capturing her lips in a slow, deep kiss with the toy trapped between them. </p><p>The kiss didn’t last nearly long enough for Valeera, but the consolation of Tess’s lips trailing along her jaw to nibble along her sensitive ear was sufficient. </p><p>“It would look better in you.” Tess husked against Valeera’s ear, earning herself a set of nails in her lower back and impatient rock of Valeera’s hips as the other woman’s thighs lifted along her sides to try and position her with their strength.</p><p>“Stop teasing me.” Valeera gasped when Tess’s teeth grazed her shoulder and she gave a slow, deep rock of her hips - still without moving the toy from where it was between them. </p><p>“I’m not teasing you.” Tess whispered, pressing Valeera’s thighs down against the bed and brushing her fingertips against the ample wetness that had gathered between them. She used her glistening fingers to slick the tip of the toy. </p><p>“Then fuck me,” Valeera responded, looking up into Tess’s eyes in the dim glow cast by the little lamp on the bedside table. “Please just fuck me, Tess.” </p><p>Tess shifted her hips just enough to line up the toy, and her lips were back against Valeera’s ear as Valeera strained with want beneath her.</p><p>“I have you, Valeera,” Tess whispered as she began pressing forward. “Just trust me.” </p><p>That was a tall order, honestly. But Valeera was too busy holding her breath as Tess’s hips worked forward until she couldn't think about much aside from how utterly full she felt.</p><p>One of Tess’s hands came up to stroke Valeera’s hair, and her only movement for a moment was resting the weight of her lower body down against Valeera as she waited.</p><p>It wasn't for long, though. Valeera was a ‘more’ person. Always ‘more’. Tess hard surmised that about her bedroom habits rather quickly, and Valeera was thankful as fuck for that fact when Tess’s hips finally began rocking against her own.</p><p>Slow and deep at first, and then sharper and harder all while Valeera urged her on - leaving trails of pink skin behind her nails across Tess’s back until it was all she could do to hook her arms up and around Tess’s shoulders.</p><p>There was something so hot and unhinged about the way Tess was panting against her shoulder. About the slightly damp hair at the nape of her neck and the creaking of the bed that only stopped when Tess reached up with one hand to grab the headboard.</p><p>Valeera held nothing back. Not a single whimper or moan or gasp. Because at least sex was something she didn't have to hide. It was something she could hide <i>in</i>. Utterly. </p><p>“Harder.” Valeera gasped out, her eyes shutting tightly as Tess’s hips snapped forward sharply and her knees dug into the bed for purchase in response to the demand. “Like that. Fuck, yes. Fuck me.” </p><p>Tess’s arms hooked beneath Valeera’s knees then. Drawing them up so that each thrust went deeper with less hindrance. </p><p>Valeera could feel the strain in Tess’s body. Especially when Tess bent one of her arms between them to find Valeera’s clit with her fingertips. </p><p>Valeera almost didn't make it past that initial touch.</p><p>“Come for me, love,” Tess whispered breathlessly somewhere between the pillow and Valeera’s ear. “Come hard for me.”</p><p>And god, she did. So hard that she wasn't even aware of the first few moments that followed. Just that Tess’s weight was still pressing down against her. That Tess’s chest was still heaving against her own.</p><p>Her hips were still moving, but only just enough to draw out the last few whimpers from Valeera’s lips as her orgasm finally ebbed.</p><p>She was aware enough then, at least, to pull Tess down against her. To take the strain out of her trembling arms.</p><p>Tess was still gasping for breath when one of Valeera’s hands tangled sharply in the hair at the back of her head and her other pressed between them to tug the buckled of the harness loose so that she could reach between Tess’s legs. </p><p>“Your turn.” Valeera mumbled, her voice weak and trembling even as her fingers circled fast and sure against Tess’s clit - slicked by the wetness she’d found there.</p><p>Tess tried to lift herself onto one of her knees, her upper body landing half on Valeera rather gracelessly as her face pressed against the pillow next to Valeera’s head and she came with a series of shuddering, breathy sounds that had Valeera desperately seeking more.</p><p>Valeera wasn't sure how Tess had the energy left, but the moment she pressed two of her fingers into her as deep as she could, Tess pressed her own hand down beside Valeera’s and mirrored the action.</p><p>Neither of them had any words left as Tess rode hard against Valeera’s fingers and curled her own inside Valeera while she worked her clit with the heel of her palm. </p><p>It was all gasps and shudders and moans until they'd both come again and Tess half-fell onto her side against Valeera. </p><p>They both freed their hands of each other lazily. Tess was too gone to bother with the harness she was still slightly tangled in, and it took everything Valeera had in that moment to focus her vision as she turned her head to look at her.</p><p>“Fuck.” Valeera whispered weakly, allowing her hand to fall to the side against Tess’s stomach. “You okay?”</p><p>“I'm fine.” Tess reassured softly as Valeera watched the warm yellow lamp-light catch the fine sheen of sweat along Tess’s collarbones. When she looked back up, Tess was smiling at her and finally managing to pull the harness away and drop it off the side of the bed. </p><p>“You were so lovely.” Tess whispered, and Valeera could've sworn she heard genuine awe in her tone.</p><p>“You were...a lot.” Valeera breathed with a raspy laugh. “A lot.”</p><p>“I'm afraid I don't know if that's a good thing or not.” Tess sounded playful. </p><p>“You do too know.” Valeera accused as she slowly rolled into her stomach and heaved a rather heavy, contented sigh.</p><p>“Perhaps.” Tess moved a little closer and reached to shift Valeera’s hair away from the flushed skin of her back so she would be cooler.</p><p>Valeera was still looking at her, eyes half-lidded and the glow of them unusually soft.</p><p>“You're thinking.” Tess observed, and Valeera’s lips quirked into a faint smirk.</p><p>“A wild accusation.”</p><p>There was quiet again, then, as Valeera’s eyes fluttered shut.</p><p>When they opened again, Tess was sitting against the headboard holding a half-finished glass of water out to her.</p><p>She looked like she’d even wiped herself down.</p><p>Valeera pushed herself up with a little wince followed by a pleased hum as she leaned into Tess’s shoulder and finished off the water before handing the glass back over.</p><p>“Sore?” Tess asked with a hand coming to rest atop Valeera’s thigh.</p><p>“Perfectly sore.” Valeera complimented as she tugged fruitlessly at the blankets they were mostly sitting on top of before Tess helped her - pulling them across their laps. </p><p>She managed to get an arm around Valeera’s back somewhere in there, and Valeera was happy to turn into the comfort of Tess’s chest and, inevitably, her other arm until she was wrapped rather securely in both blankets and Tess.</p><p>For once, it was Valeera who talked first. A soft murmur just beneath Tess’s collarbone.</p><p>“I don't want you to see my apartment because it's embarrassing.” She began, while Tess threaded her fingers through her hair. “And because I'm proud to have it, which is even more embarrassing. I don't want you to know things. Because if you know things, and you stick around, it'll be out of pity.” </p><p>Tess stayed quiet, but pulled Valeera a little closer. Held her a little tighter.</p><p>“And I don't want that to be the reason that you keep wanting to be around me.” Valeera finally managed, and Tess slowly rested her forehead against the top of her head.</p><p>“I'm inclined to be around you because no one has made me laugh the way that you do,” Tess whispered. “And because of all the facets I get to see that, perhaps, others don't. The lovely little things that make you so uniquely who you are. That keep drawing me closer. Not pushing me away.” </p><p>“What if the things that made me who I am are terrible things?” Valeera countered, her voice still barely audible - muffled, now, in the crook of Tess’s neck.</p><p>“Occasionally, terrible things beget wonderful ones. And I believe you are a wonderful thing. Very worth sticking around for. Very worth texting ‘good morning’ and being left on read because you probably picked up your phone and rolled your eyes and went back to sleep.”</p><p>“I don't do that.” Valeera whispered half-heartedly.</p><p>“You do.” Tess chuckled. “And now I know it for sure. But that's an okay thing, too. Because at least I know that you know I want your morning to be good.” </p><p>“Okay, that was a lot of talking,” Valeera responded before placing a kiss against Tess’s jaw just beneath her ear. “Can I stay the night?”</p><p>“Of course. I had hoped you might.” Tess’s voice was soft and low as she lifted Valeera’s chin and ran her thumb across her lips, kiss-bruised and free, now, of the lipstick that had been on them. “Do you know what else?”</p><p>“Mm?”</p><p>“You take cock very well.” Tess teased in a whisper, pressing a smile of a kiss to Valeera’s lips. “I think I should give it to you more often.”</p><p>“I can't stand you, actually.” Valeera breathed, kissing Tess again before she had a chance to pull away. </p><p>“Another lie.” Tess accused, following along with Valeera as she moved to get comfortable under the sheets.</p><p>“Shh, I'm sleeping.” Valeera breathed, turning on her side away from Tess, secure in the knowledge that Tess would press up behind her and slip an arm around her waist.</p><p>“Goodnight, then.” Tess brushed her lips against Valeera’s shoulder as she did just what she knew Valeera expected her to, and gladly. </p><p>Valeera shifted back so more of her body was pressed along Tess’s front, and she found Tess’s hand against her stomach so that she could twine their fingers together. Only then did she allow her eyes to close and finally give in to the sleep she'd been feigning half-heartedly. But not before returning a whispered ‘goodnight’, first.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Last Hope</h2></a>
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    <i>And the salt in my wounds isn't burning any more than it used to</i><br/>
<i>It's not that I don't feel the pain, it's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore</i><br/>
<i>And the blood in these veins isn't pumping any less than it ever has</i><br/>
<i>And that's the hope I have, the only thing I know that's keeping me alive</i>
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</div><br/><p>Jaina stood slowly in a way that made the relative emptiness of the courtroom feel filled. She took another moment of the court’s time to fill the room with silence for a beat.</p>
<p>Every move she made was a calculated, practiced dance. The sharpness of her eyes. The way her fingertips tested on the edge of the counsel table as she looked first at the legal team across the room and then up towards the judge.</p>
<p>“We've spent nearly a month, now, going back and forth in regards to my client’s worthiness of raising her own children. She's sat there quietly and listened to accusations of neglect and inadequacy. And what had been the main focus of those arguments?”</p>
<p>Jaina waited for an answer that, quite obviously, wasn't coming.</p>
<p>“Money.” She continued, tapping her fingertips against the table once before steepling her fingers in front of her waist. “My client can't afford this. My client can't afford that. My client is looking for a <i>free ride</i>. Imagine. Imagine thinking that raising two children is a ‘free ride’. Imagine believing that. Believing that money is somehow more important than safety and nurturing and love.”</p>
<p>Jaina looked in her client's direction, then. </p>
<p>“And what has my client done, aside from prove to you - time and again - that she is more than deserving in <i>every</i> regard - to get her children back? To regain the time she lost with them due to being forced into a terrible situation by endless proceedings? Your honor, she fought for them to her last dime. And then she kept fighting. From hotel rooms. From a women’s shelter. And now, from a little two-bedroom apartment. Not a mansion. Not an estate in the hills with a pool and acreage of meadows as far as the eye can see. But it's enough, because she has so much more than that to offer. She has so many more <i>important</i> things to offer that are essential for the livelihood of any child. <i>Every</i> child. Because you can throw money at a problem until it's utterly buried, yet still there nonetheless. My client had to dig her way out of the proof of that.”</p>
<p>Another pause. Jaina could feel the eyes of the ex-husband burning into the side of her head, and she had never felt so energized. So encouraged. </p>
<p>“My client has love, your honor. My client has the willingness to risk <i>everything</i> for those children. She has proven, time and again, that she is and always will be the clear and obvious choice for custody. If the opposing counsel is worried about the supporting of lifestyles, it's only because they haven't properly read through our requirements for support. Which, by the way, are quite forgiving all things considered. But I think what matters most here, and what it is my job to concern myself with - is the well-being of my client. That well-being just so happens to directly align with that of her children, who are being used as pawns. As tools of pain and revenge rather than as something to be loved and cherished. So, your honor, in closing - I believe in a system that is fair even to those who don't live in the hills and pay for their problems with cash instead of with learning and understanding. I believe in a system that would have these children returned to a mother who lost everything in the desperate fight to keep them, and who fought her way, tooth and nail, back out of that pit she fell in through no fault of her own to stand here before you today. I believe in this court’s willingness to do what is truly right for my client, and for these children.” </p>
<p>Jaina returned to her seat and made eye contact with the judge once more before sitting down slowly. She heard furious scribbling from the pens across the way. She still felt the eyes on her, at least for a moment longer.</p>
<p>But Jaina’s hand was beneath the table squeezing the arm of the woman next to her to calm her, because she was much more aware of the fact that she was trembling than she was of anything else. </p>
<p>There was a pause of a few minutes as the judge shifted through stacks upon stacks of papers. Records, all of it, of everything this man had done to ruin this woman. </p>
<p>And then he cleared his throat and removed his glasses.</p>
<p>“It is the court’s decision that, as of adjournment today, full parental rights be restored to Ms. Wintermoon. It is also the court’s decision that she be awarded all court costs from these proceedings, as well as monthly marital support and funds for the adequate maintaining of the lifestyle the children have grown accustomed to. These numbers will be provided to both parties, though Counsellor Menethil already has them. As should her opposing counsel. They were drafted and proposed by her, and the court agrees with her proposition. Visitation for Mr. Whittle will be unsupervised, provided there are no interruptions or inconsistencies in the proposed custody agreement. However, we will reconvene immediately upon being notified by Counsellor Menethil that this agreement has been violated in any way. Consider the matter of custody settled, and this decision - the will of the court, and therefore final. Any further suits would be considered frivolous, as I consider many prior ones to be. Adjourned.” </p>
<p>Jaina sat quietly as her elven client sat still beside her after an initial jump following the crack of the gavel, her ears pressed back and her shoulders straight and tense. She continued sitting quietly as she looked straight ahead, the tears pooling in her eyes glinting against the glow of them.</p>
<p>Soon, her ex-husband was gone. Everyone, really, was gone.</p>
<p>Even the casually-dressed bar owner who had been listening to the last hour or so of the hearing from the hallway outside the courtroom doors, relaying many of the things being said inside to Maiev - who had demanded updates the moment she knew Sylvanas was going. </p>
<p>“Thank you.” The woman whispered, finally lifting a hand to cover her own mouth as the first sob left her lips.</p>
<p>Jaina quickly stood and leaned over her to wrap her in a strong hug. “No, thank you,” Jaina responded firmly as the woman clung to the lapels of her jacket. “You did this. You. Every bit of this was you.”</p>
<p>“Mom?”</p>
<p>Jaina pulled away quickly when she heard that little voice and turned to see where it had come from. To see the high-lifted, slightly stubby pointed ears of two young children standing with a social worker in the doorway. </p>
<p>Until the older woman gave them a gentle nudge and an even gentler smile and they came thundering up the center walkway only to both be lifted and swung around by a mother who had gone without them for far too long. A grateful mother. A wonderful mother. </p>
<p>Jaina got her paperwork together and packed her bag away while her client knelt down with them and held them both close.</p>
<p>In passing, on her way towards the doors, she gave the woman’s shoulder a quick squeeze.</p>
<p>“You have my number. Keep it, always.” </p>
<p>Jaina turned when the woman reached out quickly to grab her hand, and their eyes met for a moment.</p>
<p>Again, the woman thanked her. In a barely audible whisper as the kids stayed tucked close against her.</p>
<p>“You're welcome.” Jaina said - her voice as soft as her smile - before her hand was released and she made her way out of the courtroom to give them time, now that time was a thing that they had.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
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</div>The buzz always wore off quickly after the conclusion an important case. Or at least, one that was important to Jaina.<p>She was dragging as she began organizing the various files to store in case she should need them again sometime soon. It was a possibility she was always ready for. She kept her promises. </p>
<p>She caught movement out of the corner of her vision after bending down to store another folder in the banker box she'd assembled next to her desk, and paused when she saw Arthas standing in her doorway.</p>
<p>“Hey, just wanted to pop in and let you know the boys invited me to the clubhouse tonight, so I'll probably be late.” Arthas was already turning to leave when Jaina responded.</p>
<p>“We were supposed to have dinner tonight.”</p>
<p>Arthas paused with a hand on the frame of the door and sighed his frustration at her as he looked at her. “I know. It isn't like I forgot. It's just that these are relationships I need to maintain. I'm passing the next exam. I can't give up on the social requirements of making partner.”</p>
<p>Jaina mulled over those words as she sat back in her chair and waved her hand. “Fine. I don't care. I won my case today, by the way.”</p>
<p>Arthas lifted a brow and feigned at least enough interest to get Jaina’s hopes up.</p>
<p>“That's great, J. I really think the charity cases are cleaning the mud off our boots nicely. I'm sure my father appreciates it.”</p>
<p>Jaina swallowed and tapped her thumb against the edge of her desk. “That isn't why I do it. You know that, right?”</p>
<p>
  <i>Please know at least that much about me.</i>
</p>
<p>“Sure, sure I…”</p>
<p>Jaina watched as Arthas’s attention shifted from her to someone approaching in the hallway, and she knew by the grin on his face as he clapped one of the junior partners on the shoulder and greeted him that she wouldn't be getting that attention back tonight. </p>
<p>She took her time, then. Organizing. Reminding herself of the events of the day prior to her husband snubbing her.</p>
<p>She also wondered if she really minded all that much, deep down.</p>
<p>In the end, it must have stung on some level - because eventually, she pulled her phone out of her bag with every intention of typing out a quick ‘we won' to Sylvanas.</p>
<p>Jaina hadn't been by the bar the past couple of weeks. She'd been so consumed with prepping for this case and staying on top of all the others. </p>
<p>And as she unlocked the screen once it powered on, she was met with a rather long looking text notification from...Sylvanas.</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>You were amazing, Jaina. I know you're probably busy, and I definitely don't want to be a distraction. I just wanted you to know that. And I wanted to tell you congratulations.</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>...You were there?</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>Yeah. I hope that's not weird or anything. There's nothing weird about lurking in the hallway of a courthouse, right? Anyway, Maiev would've killed me if I didn't tell her how it went. I also just...wanted to be there, you know?</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>You should have come inside, silly.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <i>I didn't want to be -blatantly- weird. Just regular weird. Anyway, if you aren't doing anything tonight, I figured some celebratory drinks might be in order? My treat, obviously. As a thank you. I haven't seen you around in a while.</i>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <i>I’ve been so wrapped up with work. I have a blissfully free schedule tomorrow, however. Drinks would be more than welcome.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>Great. We’re closing up at ten tonight, and Valeera won't mind cleaning up. Just text me when you're outside and we’ll head up to my place.</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Sounds good. I'll text you.</i>
</p>
<p>In the end, Jaina was a little early. Even after cleaning everything up and heading home to get changed into a pair of jeans and a sweater instead of the suit and heels, she was still looking out her driver’s window at a buzzing, very much on open sign. </p>
<p>She risked a text anyway. Just a quick 'I'm here. I know I'm early.’</p>
<p>And the sign blinked out into darkness as soon as the message was marked ‘read’.</p>
<p>As surprised as she was, Jaina still took that as her cue to approach the door, which was opened for her as soon as she walked up.</p>
<p>The warmth in Sylvanas's grin made it feel less frigid outside, somehow. Perhaps it made her feel a little less cold inside, as well. It was so big and genuine and familiar.</p>
<p>“Hey. Come in. My ears are gonna freeze off.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas was in her usual garb. Plaid over a tank top with old, comfortable-looking jeans that still fit her nicely cut to hang over the tops of her boots. </p>
<p>And Jaina was chuckling at her dramatics. </p>
<p>“Don't laugh.” Sylvanas complained, shuttling and locking the door behind her as Valeera lifted her head and waved at Jaina from behind the counter. “It's a very real fear.”</p>
<p>“They won't freeze off. It's not even that cold outside. Besides, we’re inside now and you're just fine.”</p>
<p>“If you say so.” Sylvanas remarked, heading for the bar and leaning over it to grab one of the gin bottles she'd recently ordered for herself. “I have the stuff for Manhattans upstairs, don't worry.”</p>
<p>“I'll drink what you're drinking.” Jaina rushed to respond, stopping at the corner of the bar when Sylvanas walked around it. “You have orange juice right? I don't know how I feel about straight gin.”</p>
<p>“The same way everyone who isn't me feels about it probably. Like it needs juice.” </p>
<p>Valeera hissed out a laugh, then. She would never understand how Sylvanas drank the stuff straight, and she was already holding out an unopened bottle of OJ to Jaina.</p>
<p>“You're supposed to follow her, by the way.” Valeera explained over the bar. “She lives upstairs, she's just bad at words.” </p>
<p>“Valeera.” Sylvanas was glaring daggers at the back of her friend’s head. Daggers that Valeera avoided by paying her absolutely no attention.</p>
<p>Jaina could only laugh and thank Valeera for the juice before she finally rounded the bar and followed Sylvanas through the door and up the hidden staircase. </p>
<p>Jaina blinked in surprise when Sylvanas first turned on the light when they reached the residential floor of the building.</p>
<p>The lift was rather well-decorated. Minimal in lovely in all the right ways from the lovely divider that separated what looked to be the sleeping area from the living room. The exposed brick everywhere, too, was gorgeous. It was such a departure from Jaina’s own home, and maybe that's what she needed right then. A departure. Because it felt new and freeing and good to be here.</p>
<p>The take-out arranged on the coffee table, too, was a more than welcome sight.</p>
<p>“Can't drink on an empty stomach.” Sylvanas said with a hopeful smile as she held her arms out in entreaty. “Hope you like Chinese.”</p>
<p>Her ears twitched a bit as she looked around and then back at Jaina. “I know it isn't much, I just. Wanted to do something for you. I really appreciate what you did today. Fuck, you've been standing there for eighty-four years holding orange juice. Here.” Sylvanas held out a hand and took the bottle - retreating to the little corner kitchen to mix Jaina a drink before she made her way towards the living area, Jaina’s drink in one hand and an empty glass tumbler for her own drink in the other. </p>
<p>Jaina followed her towards the couch, taking a seat and observing the little to-go boxes and bowls. Way too much food for two people, and not a single plate in sight. Yet somehow, it was rather perfect.</p>
<p>“Sylvanas?”</p>
<p>Sylvanas looked up from the egg roll bag she’d been reaching for, and her ears did that twitching thing again that Jaina had noticed earlier.</p>
<p>“I don't mean to pry, but...you seem nervous. Do you have many friends over? Because I want you to be comfortable with this. Our friendship. I don't want you to feel the need to try so hard. All of this is more than enough. Just...having a real friend, for once, is more than enough.”</p>
<p>Jaina’s hands were folded in her lap as she spoke, and she seemed as nervous about what she was saying as she was accusing Sylvanas of being. </p>
<p>“I appreciate that.” Sylvanas said as she pulled an egg roll out of the bag and leaned back on the couch, her eyes resting easily on Jaina. “But just because I'm not used to having many friends doesn't mean what I'm doing is trying too hard. Friendship is worth a little effort, and so are you.” </p>
<p>“Oh.” Jaina’s response was so simple and genuine it seemed like that thought likely hadn't even occurred to her. </p>
<p>She was sipping on her drink and plucking a shrimp out of a container a moment later - and Sylvanas was admiring her chopstick skills as she popped the tab on a Coke to chase her first shot of gin with. </p>
<p>“Do you watch much TV?” Sylvanas asked as she nudged the remote in Jaina’s direction across the cushion that separated them.</p>
<p>“Not really, but I probably should in this instance. At least it'll fill the void my utter lack of anything interesting to say is leaving.” Jaina looked almost bemused as she picked up the remote and examined it.</p>
<p>“We don't have to watch anything, Jaina. I'm fine with quiet. I'm fine with talking, too. Do you know how many family court hearings I've been to, by the way? I've never heard a closing statement that skillfully written.”</p>
<p>Jaina cleared her throat as her cheeks colored rather darkly. </p>
<p>“I didn't write it.” Jaina said dismissively. Quietly.</p>
<p>“Oh…” Sylvanas faltered. Her ears did 'the thing’. </p>
<p>“I mean to say, I don't write them because the last thing I want is for them to sound rehearsed. I have notes, of course. But I don't write my closing statements. I find that letting the moment take me often garners more sympathy...more anger. Whatever emotion I'm trying to evoke in a judge or a jury, it's much easier if I'm already feeling it, myself.” </p>
<p>“That’s...that’s really impressive.” Sylvanas remarked after a long pause that consisted of her slowly remembering she was looking intently at Jaina while holding an egg-roll halfway to her mouth. Instead of biting it, however, she lowered her hand to rest on her knee. “You must be a really difficult fight. In the courtroom, I mean. I would’ve felt bad for the other attorneys if I weren’t rooting for you today.” </p>
<p>“That’s where I feel the most…‘heard’, I guess. Strong. I, um. I don’t get a lot of that in my life.” Jaina was holding another shrimp in her chopsticks, but it was doing her about as much good there as Sylvanas’s unbitten egg-roll was currently doing.</p>
<p>“That home trouble you mentioned last time?” Sylvanas prodded gently, finally looking away from Jaina and taking a bite of her food before she poured herself another shot. “Is that what makes you not feel heard?” </p>
<p>Jaina was quiet. She watched the ease with which Sylvanas poured a seemingly perfect double for herself from the unspouted bottle in her hand. </p>
<p>“I hear you, by the way.” Sylvanas continued, crossing her legs and leaning herself into the corner of the sofa with her shot cradled in her hand. “If you need to talk about it, y’know? I’ll hear you.” </p>
<p>“I have a proposition for you, then.” Jaina offered with a little smile. She was feeling a little warm, now halfway through her perfectly strong drink and a little less hungry. </p>
<p>“Oh?” Sylvanas asked with a little grin as she finally polished off her egg-roll. “What might that be?”</p>
<p>“My story for yours.” Jaina responded simply. “Not a life-story. Nothing like that. Just...you know. How’d we get here type of stuff.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas’s smile fell for a moment, and she glanced at the empty glass in her hand as she mulled that offer over. </p>
<p>When she nodded, it was barely noticeable. </p>
<p>“Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.” Her eyes were back on Jaina, then. And just as gentle as they always were. Yet somehow, Jaina felt like Sylvanas seeing more than most people. She felt strangely exposed, actually. “You first, though. That way I’ll be a little less sober when it’s my turn.” </p>
<p>“Sounds like a deal.” Jaina said, her tone a little distracted. “Mix me one more, too?” </p>
<p>Sylvanas was up out of her spot on the couch taking Jaina’s glass from her with the same amount of grace she seemed to do everything with. And while she was in the little kitchen pouring more juice and more gin, Jaina began. </p>
<p>“Do you know that old, obtuse, cliche of an excuse ‘I love you, but I’m not in love with you.’?”</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s head turned in the direction of Jaina’s voice. “Yeah.” She said with a breathy sound - like a stilted laugh - tumbling past her lips. “Yeah, I know the one. Is that the ‘situation’?” </p>
<p>“Five years ago, maybe.” Jaina said in a voice so quiet Sylvanas was actually thankful for her excellent hearing for once. It was sometimes overwhelming in the bar. When Sylvanas turned around with Jaina’s drink and approached the couch, she didn’t do it quite as quickly as she’d left it. “Maybe less. Maybe I’m looking at this from a place utterly lacking in optimism.”</p>
<p>“What is it, now?” Sylvanas asked quietly, passing Jaina’s drink to her and pouring herself another double at the same time. Jaina, watching her still, mused over the fact that she probably would’ve dropped both things and made a catastrophic mess. </p>
<p>“Worse.” Jaina replied, licking her lips before she took a deep sip of her drink and bent over towards the coffee table with a sigh. “Worse because...well. So many reasons. Too many reasons. I keep telling myself my expectations have been too high. That nobody stays the same forever. That I’m sure there are plenty of wives of plenty of men that feel the same way I do.” </p>
<p>“Oh, absolutely.” Sylvanas agreed softly. “But that doesn’t mean that they should, or that it’s okay. I mean...I don’t know the situation, you know? I don’t know the specifics. But I know you seem not okay, and I know that if my partner weren’t okay - the last way I would want them to feel would be ‘unheard’.” </p>
<p>Jaina took another long, deep sip from her drink before she placed it down on the table and wrapped her arms around her middle. Sylvanas knew more than enough about body language to feel a little ache in her chest at the sight. </p>
<p>“It’s like...you know ‘love language?’” </p>
<p>“Mhmm.” </p>
<p>“It’s like he doesn’t have one.” Jaina whispered, shaking her head and scoffing at herself before she continued. “I feel so trapped.” Her voice was a touch more serious, now. A little rough around the edges. “God, it’s like I’m choking and he’s the one tightening the noose. I um...I asked him if he would go to counseling with me a little while back. He got so angry. Like it was some sort of insult.” </p>
<p>Jaina trailed off, and the silence that fell over them was something that made Sylvanas want desperately to reach out to Jaina like she would have with Valeera. She wasn’t even really sure what was stopping her. </p>
<p>“I don’t know what to do anymore.” Jaina admitted in a whisper, and Sylvanas could see it written plainly all over Jaina’s face just how much that had cost her. </p>
<p>“You probably always know what to do.” Sylvanas suggested, working at the seam of her jeans near her ankle with her fingertips just for something to do with her free hand. “So the not knowing is twice as difficult for you.” </p>
<p>“Yeah.” Jaina murmured absently. “Yeah, you’re probably right.” </p>
<p>“And...maybe that’s why you’ve been trying for so long. Because you can’t give up on the idea that you’ll figure it out.” </p>
<p>Jaina’s eyes flicked over to Sylvanas and back down again, as though she were staring at the floor in search of answers. She shifted a little closer to Sylvanas. To the warmth and understanding being offered to her so freely. </p>
<p>And Sylvanas did the same, first draping her arm along the back of the couch before Jaina turned into her with a heavy, shuddering sigh when she felt herself suddenly wrapped in the other woman’s arms. </p>
<p>“I didn’t know if hugs were okay.” Sylvanas whispered as she tightened her arms around Jaina. </p>
<p>“They are. I didn’t think to ask if you were offering.” Jaina responded - staying close for a moment longer before she pulled back, only to find Sylvanas’s hand resting warmly on her back. </p>
<p>“I am. Don’t worry.” Sylvanas reassured with a little smile, and Jaina looked at her searchingly for a long while. Long enough that Sylvanas pulled her hand away, unsure if that was too much.</p>
<p>She received her answer in regards to that lack of surety when Jaina slowly shifted to lay on her side with her head resting against Sylvanas’s thigh and her eyes looking at nothing across the room. “It’s your turn.” </p>
<p>“Oh.” Sylvanas responded, one of her hands hovering over Jaina before it seemed to decide to rest innocently against her own thigh. She hoped, at least. “Right. We had a deal.” </p>
<p>“Why’d you leave?” Jaina continued, tucking one of her arms underneath herself and curling her knees towards her chest. “Masters degree, successful career...and you left.” </p>
<p>“I ran.” Sylvanas replied, exhaling softly as she looked down at Jaina and then away, towards largely untouched food on the coffee table. “It wasn’t some planned thing. I had...enough in savings to know I’d be able to find a place somewhere else. It seemed like my only real option.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas shifted so the heel of her boot wasn’t in front of Jaina’s face on her knee anymore, and Jaina moved to get a little bit more comfortable, herself. </p>
<p>“I’ve never told anyone this.” She said after a short pause. “It’s...it’s not a nice story.” </p>
<p>“I’ve heard it all, Sylvanas.” Jaina responded without hesitation. “I want to hear it.” </p>
<p>“Ah...yeah. I guess you have.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas cleared her throat and gathered her thoughts as much as she could manage to right then. </p>
<p>“My last case was a mother who was put into recovery after her daughter was born. I was working with them for...I think six months when the state pushed for the baby to be returned for her. I wasn’t convinced she was ready. I told my superiors I thought she needed a little more time…” </p>
<p>“They didn’t listen.” Jaina finished for her when it seemed like Sylvanas couldn’t. </p>
<p>“No.” Sylvanas said in a voice smaller than Jaina thought should have any right to come out of someone who seemed as big as Sylvanas did. Even if she wasn’t all that big. “No, I uh...I went back a week after she was placed and I found the mother on the floor. Overdose. And the baby was, uhm. She was holding her. It...it’d been a while. Days. They tried to pin it on me.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas cut herself off with one of those laughs that sounded like it was trying to stave off something else. </p>
<p>“It wasn’t your fault.” Jaina said as she reached out, suddenly, for the empty glass in Sylvanas’s hand - placing it on the floor in front of the couch before she reached back for that hand and wrapped her own around it. </p>
<p>“Yeah…” Sylvanas agreed half-heartedly. “Yeah, they weren’t able to get away with making me the scapegoat. But I left anyway. I didn’t believe in any of it, anymore.” </p>
<p>“I don’t blame you for running.” Jaina finally said when it was clear Sylvanas either wouldn’t say anything else about it - or couldn’t. “Are you happier, now?” </p>
<p>“Yeah.” Sylvanas managed to breathe as some of the tension left her and she gave Jaina’s hand a little squeeze. “Yeah, mostly. Just takes time, I guess. Maybe it’ll just take a little bit more time.” </p>
<p>“Everything takes time.” Jaina whispered, finding the intimacy of their closeness something she didn’t quite know how utterly and desperately she needed. Something she couldn’t stand the thought of pulling away from, right then. “I’m listening, too, by the way.” </p>
<p>“I know.” Sylvanas replied with a furrow of her brow as she looked down at Jaina. Her eyes were burning, but she hadn’t let herself break. Not right then. She couldn’t. Not when Jaina so clearly didn’t need even a single additional thing on her plate. “Thank you for listening.”</p>
<p>“Did it feel good to get it out?” Jaina asked, still looking across the room, though she found her eyelids drooping. Between the little bit of food she’d had, and the little bit of drink - she was struggling against the fatigue the day had brought on. </p>
<p>“Felt awful.” Sylvanas admitted with a chuckle. One that Jaina returned quietly. </p>
<p>They were quiet for a while after that. Quiet enough that Sylvanas felt Jaina’s hand slowly loosen around her own until she realized the other woman had nearly drifted off.</p>
<p>For a while, Sylvanas sat there looking down at her. At the softness of her face and how small she looked all curled up the way she was. Even at the increasingly slow blinking of her eyes before she finally seemed to be dozing. </p>
<p>She found herself wondering how someone could be so beautiful while they were hurting so terribly. How there could be such a terrible thing buried underneath it all. </p>
<p>Pain should be an awful, ugly thing. Yet, it wasn’t. Not always.</p>
<p>That’s when things stopped making sense, wasn’t it? </p>
<p>“Jaina.” Sylvanas whispered the name when her leg began to fall asleep. She didn’t really know how long it had been. Long enough, probably. She glanced at the little digital clock on the cable box beneath the TV. “Jaina, it’s almost one in the morning.” </p>
<p>Jaina gasped sharply as she sat up and lifted a hand to run it over her pulled-back hair. It took her a moment of looking around to remember what was going on. </p>
<p>“Fuck. Fuck, I’m sorry. It was such a long day with court and everything...I...I’m sorry. I should get going.” </p>
<p>“Hey, don’t be sorry.” Sylvanas said, standing up and helping Jaina to her feet. “Need a cab?” </p>
<p>“It was only a drink and a half.” Jaina admonished with a slightly sleepy smile. “I’m good. Promise.” </p>
<p>“Right. I’ll walk you out, then.” </p>
<p>Another quiet walk to Jaina’s car through the dark, empty bar. </p>
<p>Another opportunity for Sylvanas to close Jaina’s door for her after a gentle reminder for Jaina to text her if she needed anything. </p>
<p>Sylvanas had only just begun pouring herself a shot and kicking her boots off when her phone vibrated in her back pocket. She was still downing the burning liquid when she unlocked the screen. </p>
<p>
  <i>You should text me if you need anything, too. I didn’t know how much I needed tonight. Thank you for everything.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>Of course. We can do it again, anytime. Please drive safe.</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p><i>Soon, then. And I will.</i> </p>
<p>Sylvanas looked at her phone as she poured herself another drink, and she inevitably cursed under her breath when she realized she’d missed the glass, entirely.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Without</h2></a>
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    <i>You're the first one, you're the champion</i><br/>
<i>You're the tall one, you're the halcyon</i><br/>
<i>You don't belong to me, you're too far away</i><br/>
<i>And everything falls apart when I try to say</i><br/>
<i>You're in love, in love without me</i><br/>
<i>So close your heart, you'll never find me</i><br/>
<i>Oh, you can hate me now</i><br/>
<i>'Cause I'll be gone</i><br/>
<i>And I'll be with you or without</i>
  </p>
</div>Valeera wasn't used to not seeing Sylvanas already prepping for their busiest day when she got to the bar on Saturday afternoon.<p>She couldn't really help the tinge of worry when she looked around and found no sign she'd even been downstairs today, either.</p><p>Strange. </p><p>She glanced out the windows as she walked past them, and saw no sign of Jaina’s car.</p><p>The worry ratcheted up a notch, and Valeera hit the staircase behind the bar - taking the steps two at a time before she was letting herself into Sylvanas’s loft to find it...unusually dark and messy.</p><p>There was Chinese food left out, no doubt from the night before. An empty gin bottle along with another that was mostly gone was keeping it company, and Sylvanas was passed out in a rather awkward position. Half on, half off the couch - tangled from the waist down in the throw that was usually folded over the back of the sofa. </p><p>Valeera didn't hesitate to walk over and reach down onto the floor to pick Sylvanas’s legs up and guide them onto the couch, and she sat down on the edge of it quickly when Sylvanas winced and let out a soft, shuddering groan.</p><p>“You're good.” Valeera murmured as she fixed the blanket and lifted a hand to stroke Sylvanas’s hair away from her face when her breathing got rather frantic, sudden. “Hey, you're good. Look at me. Syl.”</p><p>Sylvanas’s eyelids fluttered and stayed rather low over her eyes as she tried her best to focus her vision. “What time is it?”</p><p>“Early,” Valeera said as she rested a hand against Sylvanas’s chest and rubbed along her sternum gently with her thumb. “I'm gonna get up and get you some water and something for your head. Just relax, okay? I'll be right back.” </p><p>Valeera left the lights out and the black-out curtains drawn across the windows when Sylvanas nodded weakly, allowing Valeera enough reassurance to move across the room and fetch what she'd said she would.</p><p>“I'll get this cleaned up, okay? I know how you feel about messes. It's not gonna help anything for you to have to deal with this later.”</p><p>“Help what?” Sylvanas asked as Valeera helped her prop herself up at least enough to drink down the dose of headache pills with a solid half of the water. “Everything's fine, Valeera. It's just a hangover.”</p><p>“Yeah, and when was the last time you fucked yourself up this bad?” Valeera countered, though she still kept her voice low and gentle as she began collecting the various to-go containers scattered across the nearby table. “Did you and Jaina have an argument or some shit?”</p><p>“No, Valeera. Of course, not.” Sylvanas said as she finished off the water and slowly, carefully lowered herself back down onto the couch.</p><p>Valeera froze with an armload of boxes balanced precariously in her grasp and then turned to look at her friend with an unreadable expression on her face.</p><p>“Syl, did you fuck her?” There wasn't any accusation in her tone. Just very real, very obvious worry.</p><p>Sylvanas shook her head. Her next answer wasn't quite as vehement. Just a softly murmured ‘no’ before she pulled her blanket more tightly around herself and rolled away from Valeera to face the back of the couch. </p><p>“I...okay. Just. Jesus, okay. Let me finish up and I'll get you some more water and find something for you to eat real quick before you go back to sleep.” </p><p>“I'm not going back to sleep.” Sylvanas’s muffled, adamant complaint made Valeera’s ears lay back as she filled the kitchen trash can in just one trip. Mostly because it had only taken her one trip to do away with all the mess. She balanced things for a living every day. Glass things full of sloshing liquid. A few stackable boxes weren't exactly a huge obstacle.</p><p>“You are, though,” Valeera stated simply, heading back for the couch and sitting down with a sigh before she leaned against Sylvanas’s back and hooked an arm around her front so the glass of water was pressed in front of her face. “We don’t open for another four hours. You’re gonna drink another glass of water, wait for me to grab you something to eat, and take a nap.” </p><p>Sylvanas sighed and took the water from her, slowly pushing herself up and hanging her legs off the edge of the couch as she looked down at the glass. </p><p>Valeera was watching her closely, a furrow between her brows before she reached up to knead gently at the back of her neck. Judging by the angle she’d found her sleeping in, Valeera could easily guess it was killing her. </p><p>“Tell me what happened, Syl? Let me help?” </p><p>“Ah, just...nothing. Nothing, I just drank too much.” Sylvanas’s slightly raspy voice trailed off before she drank down some of the water and leaned into Valeera’s side. </p><p>“No shit. Why?” Valeera’s words were considerably harsher than her tone, and she’d also softened the sting of them by wrapping an arm around Sylvanas’s back. </p><p>“I just...I don’t know. I’m in my own head, I guess. Thinking things I shouldn’t be thinking. Giving myself things to worry about that I shouldn’t be worrying about.” </p><p>“You always do that. So it is Jaina, then?”</p><p>Sylvanas was quiet as she touched along the rim of her glass with the side of her thumb. </p><p>“Syl…” </p><p>“I didn’t do anything.” Sylvanas breathed, sounding as frustrated as she did tired. “We just talked. And her life is just...I hate to see someone like her dealing with what she’s dealing with.”</p><p>“Maybe you should do something,” Valeera remarked dryly as she gave Sylvanas’s hair a gentle, teasing tug before finally letting her go. “Maybe you’d feel better. Maybe she would, too.” </p><p>“What are you suggesting?” Sylvanas asked as her eyes flashed up in Valeera’s direction and she finally allowed herself to lean back into the couch cushions. </p><p>“I dunno,” Valeera responded with a shrug. “I really don’t. Do you...do you have feelings for her? Like...beyond the fact that she’s hot?” </p><p>Sylvanas’s jaw clenched and she slowly pulled her legs up onto the couch underneath herself while Valeera watched and waited for an answer that didn’t seem to be coming. </p><p>“I’m gonna make you a sandwich, okay?” Valeera’s voice was uncharacteristically quiet. </p><p>Sylvanas nodded. At least the water was starting to help. The headache medicine would kick in soon, too. That didn’t help with anything else, though. With the things she couldn’t talk to Valeera about...because Valeera could have been that baby on the floor that night. </p><p>Valeera could have been any of the cases Sylvanas considered catastrophic failures. </p><p>Yet, here she was. Throwing together a hasty turkey and swiss and carrying it over to her. She’d even sliced it. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Sylvanas said quietly as she took the plate and rested in her lap. “You shouldn’t have to deal with my fuck-ups.” </p><p>“You dealt with mine for years,” Valeera said as she stood in front of Sylvanas and reached down to take one of her hands in her own. She held it even as she continued talking. “I think I owe you more than a turkey sandwich for the times you’ve covered my rent.” </p><p>“It’s been months,” Sylvanas said - an almost fierce expression on her face as she looked up into Valeera’s eyes. “Don’t belittle yourself, Valeera. You’ve done better than you know.” </p><p>One corner of Valeera’s lips turned up and she exhaled softly through her nose. “Ditto.” She said that simple word, and Sylvanas had never felt so baited in her life. </p><p>She was still staring at Valeera as she retreated towards the door of the loft.</p><p>“Set your alarm for 4:30,” Valeera called out through the doorway. “I’ll have everything handled. Eat and go to sleep.” </p><p>Sylvanas had little choice but to listen, really.</p>
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</div>“Can you be a little more specific as to what you mean when you say ‘try’?” Arthas sounded as though he was already struggling with the conversation Jaina had started not even five minutes ago, and she pressed her lips together for a moment before she tried, again, to explain.<p>“I mean I’m unhappy, Arthas. And we need to at least try to fix this. Please don’t tell me you don’t think anything is wrong, because I already know that you don’t. I already know you’re perfectly happy with the way that things are. But I’m not. And I can’t keep living like this.” </p><p>Arthas sighed heavily and lowered his face into his hands, some of his shower-damp hair falling over them as he stayed that way for a moment before crossing his arms against the countertop of the island in their kitchen and looking across it at Jaina. “Alright. Okay. What’s that bar you’ve been hanging around lately? It’s Saturday night, let’s go there. You like that, right?” </p><p>Jaina was a little surprised. More than a little, actually. And then, all at once, she was filled with a sense of dread she tried her best to hide. Then again, it wasn’t that hard to hide things from Arthas. He wasn’t the most observant person.</p><p>“We could go to the clubhouse,” Jaina suggested. “I know that’s your favorite place.” </p><p>Arthas shrugged in a non-committal way and glanced at Jaina. “That’s...it’s just that usually, I go there with the guys.” </p><p>Ah. He didn’t want her there. Right. </p><p>Well, fuck.</p><p>“Sure. Sure, we’ll go to the bar.” Jaina offered Arthas a smile that was forced, yet seemed to please him, and then she headed to the bathroom for her own shower.</p><p>She spent a good portion of that time thinking about how she might warn Sylvanas that she was in a bit of a predicament. That she was about to show up to her gay bar with her wholeass husband in tow. </p><p>And she couldn’t come to any real solution.</p><p>It shouldn’t seem like a thing she needed to warn the other woman about, so...why did it? And how could she do it without seeming exceedingly weird? </p><p>In the end, she didn’t send the text. She just rode next to Arthas in silence aside from giving him the occasional direction. </p><p>When they pulled up outside, Jaina had never felt tenser in her life - even if she didn’t show it.</p><p>Well, aside from the moment they walked into the shockingly crowded bar and both Valeera and Sylvanas looked up at them from where they’d been discussing a ticket across the bar from each other. </p><p>“Shit,” Valeera said under her breath, quickly looking up at Sylvanas and giving her hand a quick squeeze before she left the ticket in it. “I got it.”</p><p>Valeera usually did handle all the tables on the busy nights, so at least that had worked out. Sylvanas was more than tangled up enough in the countless drink orders to pay too terribly much attention to Jaina and the man - no doubt her husband - who had walked in after her.</p><p>Aside from a strange, unfamiliar level of discomfort and...betrayal? No. She didn’t have any right to feel that way. Anyone was allowed in her bar. This was a good thing. She was happy for Jaina - that her husband was here with her tonight.</p><p>She was happy for her, damnit. </p><p>Valeera offered them both the same exact smile as she approached the table and placed a coaster in front of each of them, along with a bowl of mixed roasted nuts. </p><p>“Evening.” Valeera greeted over the din of the crowd. “What can I get you two started off with?” </p><p>“Uh...scotch for me. Neat. And a glass of house white for her.” </p><p>Valeera shot a glance in Jaina’s direction only to find Jaina’s face looked a little warm and her gaze had landed anywhere but on Valeera. </p><p>“Sure. Scotch and house white…” Valeera said, her smile nearly faltering as she turned and made her way back to the bar where Sylvanas was waiting for her with her ears sunk into an awfully low cant. </p><p>“Um. He wants a neat scotch. And he wants her to have a glass of white.” </p><p>“What...what’s that supposed to mean?” Sylvanas asked curiously as she pulled down a wine glass and popped the cork on a fresh bottle. </p><p>“It means he ordered for her and she looked like she wanted to disappear beneath the floorboards.” Valeera responded dryly. </p><p>Sylvanas prepared the rest of the drink order silently - in the end, placing the scotch, the wine, and a Manhattan on Valeera’s tray. </p><p>“Syl…”</p><p>“She drinks Manhattans.” Sylvanas responded simply before starting on the next order. </p><p>Jaina noticed there was one too many drinks on the tray as soon as Valeera approached the table, and she looked at her questioningly as both the wine and the Manhattan were placed in front of her. </p><p>“On the house. Bartender’s trying out something new.” </p><p>Valeera turned her attention, as well as a sickening smile in Arthas’s direction - coupled with a wink. “Didn’t think he’d want one. He doesn’t seem like the twist of orange type of guy.” </p><p>Jaina watched the exchange curiously. She also watched Arthas watch Valeera walk away, and Arthas’s brows were lifted when he looked back across the table at her. </p><p>He cleared his throat and looked down at his drink. “Cute girl.” He remarked nonchalantly. </p><p>“She is.” Jaina agreed idly, bringing the Manhattan to her lips and drinking from it rather deeply considering it was more of a ‘sipping’ type of cocktail. </p><p>Sylvanas watched this exchange from behind the bar, and felt a slight bristle in response to the way Arthas had looked at Valeera. For more than one reason. </p><p>“He has no fucking shame.” Sylvanas breathed in frustration as Valeera came to pick up her next order. </p><p>“He’s a bro,” Valeera explained. “He’s just too old to still be a bro, that’s all.” </p><p>“He’s garbage.” Sylvanas grumbled, wiping her brow quickly with the towel hanging in her apron as she shoved another pouring nozzle into the fifth bottle of vodka they’d gone through that night. Grumpily.</p><p>Valeera frowned. “Well, yeah. Obviously. Or his wife wouldn’t be meeting you here after hours. But let’s focus, yeah? You’re gonna give me a stroke, and I don’t have the fortitude to distract him all night.” </p><p>“Fine.” </p><p>Valeera sighed and turned away from the bar with another tray of drinks. </p><p>They would both be exhausted at the end of the night. For once, Valeera didn’t think that would be such a bad thing. At least not in Sylvanas’s case. </p><p>“Jaina?” </p><p>Jaina looked up from her third Manhattan with a lift of her brow as she stirred it idly with the little straw sticking down past the ice. “Mm?”</p><p>“Did you, uh...did you know this is a gay bar?” </p><p>Jaina stared at him incredulously for a while. </p><p>“Yes, Arthas.”</p><p>“Oh.” </p><p>Arthas cleared his throat and knocked back another drink, placing the empty glass on the edge of the table just in time for Valeera to come by and pick it up to add it to her already full tray. </p><p>“Another drink for you?” </p><p>“Yeah. None for her.” He responded before glancing in Jaina’s direction. “You’re good right, babe?” </p><p>Jaina looked right back at him without ever glancing in Valeera’s direction. There was a rather pregnant pause before she responded. “Yeah. I’m good.” </p><p>“Bring her a glass of water, yeah?” Arthas said as he looked up at Valeera and offered her a wink in return for the one she’d given him earlier. </p><p>She grinned at him and turned away, looking utterly scandalized the moment she had extracted herself from the situation. </p><p>“One more for him and a water for her.” Valeera said to Sylvanas, who was currently leaned over the bar catching her breath for once. The crowd had finally started to thin out, and she still wasn’t 100% from earlier that day. </p><p>“Yeah.” Sylvanas responded with a nod, fixing the drinks quickly before she leaned back over. </p><p>Valeera almost said something, but decided it would be best if she didn’t. </p><p>She was still placing the glasses down on Jaina and Arthas’s table when the door dinged and a rather out-of-place looking woman walked in. </p><p>The sight of her drew Arthas’s attention immediately. </p><p>“She looks...homeless?” Arthas remarked to Jaina, ignoring Valeera’s presence entirely. </p><p>“She is.” Valeera said in an emotionless, even tone. </p><p>“That’s...interesting,” Arthas remarked with a look of distaste on his face as he glanced down at his drink. “You know...I think we’ll take the check, actually.” </p><p>Valeera’s jaw was clenched when Jaina looked at her and then back at Arthas quickly. </p><p>“Arthas.” She hissed his name, and he looked at her defensively. </p><p>“What? It’s just not my usual crowd. I don't drink with a lot of homeless people, and the Benz is outside. Plus, I’m starving and they don’t even have wings or anything.” </p><p>“I’m.” Jaina swallowed thickly as her face burned all the way up to her ears. She looked up at Valeera, then. “I’m so sorry. Can he get the check when you get a chance? I need to go freshen up.” </p><p>Jaina couldn’t disappear into the bathroom quickly enough. But once she was there, she lingered over the sink and avoided looking at herself in the mirror as she splashed her face with water took a series of slow, measured breaths. </p><p>She headed for a stall door immediately when she heard the main door to the restroom swing open. </p><p>“Hey, wait.” </p><p>Jaina froze when she heard Valeera’s voice, but she didn’t turn to look at her. </p><p>“It’s okay, you know.” Valeera continued as she took another step forward and reached around Jaina - holding a blissfully soft tissue in her hands. Jaina had, of course, been planning to use the two-ply toilet paper to fix her makeup. “It didn’t bother me.” </p><p>Jaina looked at her finally, already wiping beneath her eyes quickly before she tucked the tissue into her bag. “Well…” Jaina sighed and looked at her rather helplessly before glancing down at the floor between them. “I’m still sorry. He’s…”</p><p>“He’s an asshole.” Valeera finished for her. “That doesn’t mean you are. It’s all good. I gotta get back to work.” </p><p>She was gone before Jaina could thank her. Before she could do much of anything, really. If anything, she felt more guilty than she had before for Arthas’s behavior. She’d always felt more than a little responsible for reigning him in, and that certainly hadn’t changed tonight. </p><p>At least she had managed to regain her composure rather quickly as a result of the impromptu visit, and by the time she returned to the table - Arthas was standing up and putting his jacket on, looking as if nothing at all had happened. </p><p>“I’m ready to go to dinner,” Arthas announced as he produced the keys from his pocket. “What are you in the mood for?” </p><p>“I’m going home, Arthas,” Jaina responded simply as she got her own coat on and re-shouldered her bag. “Eat whatever you want.” </p><p>“...Jaina. Don’t be ridiculous. I have the car.” Arthas was looking around uncomfortably, now. And Jaina noticed. </p><p>“I already got an Uber.” Jaina said under her breath as she headed for the door.</p><p>He followed her silently, but as soon as they made it to the sidewalk outside - he reached for her arm and turned her around to face him rather forcefully. “Jaina!”</p><p>He wasn’t prepared for her expression. For the venom in her voice. “Don’t you fucking dare.” She breathed as she took a step closer to him. “Don’t you fucking dare put your god damned hands on me, Arthas Menethil.”</p><p>“Jaina, I...I didn’t…” He sighed heavily and reached out for her again, with none of the force he’d used the first time. </p><p>She reached up and put a hand against his chest to stop him getting any closer. “No, you know what? Do it again. Do it one more fucking time. I’ll kill you in your fucking sleep.” </p><p>Her face was the color of the red light a block over.</p><p>Her eyes were colder than he’d ever seen them.  </p><p>“Jaina, I’m sorry. Look. Just get in the car. We’ll pick up something and go home and…”</p><p>“No, fuck you,” Jaina whispered as she took a step back. “Do what you want. I’m gonna get a room or something. I’ll see you tomorrow if you’re done being an absolute waste of my fucking time by then.”</p><p>Arthas stood there for a while before glancing nervously in the direction of the bar as Jaina disappeared down the sidewalk and turned a corner. Just as he decided it might be best to go to the car, Sylvanas was rounding the corner of the bar in a rush to get to the door.</p><p>When she made sudden, <i>very</i> solid contact with Valeera, who had been conveniently carrying a glass of water which somehow only ended up on the front of Sylvanas’s shirt. </p><p>“You need to change your shirt.” Valeera said firmly as she kept standing right where she’d been - directly between Sylvanas and the door. </p><p>“Valeera, move.” Sylvanas hissed under her breath as she reached down and began untying her apron while the rather wasted bar patrons continued minding their own merry business. </p><p>“No,” Valeera stated firmly, her voice a little louder now. “Go upstairs and change.”  </p><p>Sylvanas let out a trembling breath and tried again to step around her, only for Valeera to grab her by her hip and look into her eyes once she had her full attention.</p><p>“Did that look like she didn’t handle it?” Valeera asked in a hushed, urgent whisper. “Does it seem like she needs you to run out there and catch an assault charge for jumping her husband and getting your ass kicked in the middle of the road? Is that a thing you think is a good idea, right now? Let it the fuck go, Sylvanas. I’m serious. You can’t check on her from a holding cell.” </p><p>Sylvanas clenched her jaw and some of the tension in her shoulders finally seemed to leave as she stopped pushing against Valeera and took a step back. She took a deep, slow breath and held up her hands. “Okay. Okay.” </p><p>Valeera sighed in relief and gentle removed Sylvanas’s apron the rest of the way, nudging her towards the door behind the bar. “Get it together, quick. Can’t handle this many tables on my own for long.”</p>
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</div>Jaina tossed her bag down on the floor and plopped down on the edge of the bed she’d rented for the night. It was more of a suite, actually. But...she’d really needed the mini bar it offered, so there she was.<p>She’d only just gotten out of her coat when the phone on the end table next to the bed rang and she eyed it warily for a moment before lifting the receiver to her ear. </p><p>“Ms. Proudmoore? Front desk, here.”</p><p>Jaina swallowed thickly.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“There’s a Terenas Menethil on the phone for you.” </p><p>“Okay. Put him through.” </p><p>Fuck. She shouldn’t have used ‘Proudmoore’. </p><p>After a few moments of silence, Terenas’s voice came through the line. </p><p>“Hello? Hello, is this thing working?”</p><p>“It’s working.” Jaina said quietly as she leaned forward with one of her arms folded across her knees. </p><p>“Oh, Jaina! Jaina. Good. Good. I was just calling to check in.” </p><p>“Terenas, I checked in under ‘Proudmoore’ not thirty minutes ago. You didn’t find me this fast just to check in.”</p><p>“Quite right, as always. I’m calling because-”</p><p>“Because Arthas called you.” </p><p>“Well...yes. However, I really did want to check in. I know he can be...well. Jaina, it isn’t ideal for you to be in a hotel, right now. And if you need a place to stay to cool off, I’d much prefer you used the guest house.” </p><p>“I’m fine, thank you.” </p><p>“He’s a good man, Jaina. He just has his faults. He was very worried on the phone…” </p><p>“Terenas...I appreciate you calling, but I’m extremely tired. I’ll be at work on Monday, if that’s what you’re concerned about.” </p><p>There was a long span of silence between them, then. Jaina could almost feel the wheels in her father-in-law’s head spinning. This wasn’t the first time he’d tried to bail his son out. </p><p>“If there’s anything at all I can do for you, Jaina - just say the word. I’m certain he didn’t mean for things to go the way they went tonight.”</p><p>“I’m sure,” Jaina responded, looking across the room and out the window overlooking the city. She wondered how many strings Terenas had pulled to find her so quickly. “I’ll talk to him about it tomorrow. But I need to be getting to sleep, now.”</p><p>“Tomorrow?” Terenas asked, sounding genuinely relieved. “That’s good, Jaina. Good. Alright, then. Please do take care of yourself. I’ve already taken care of your lodging for the evening, of course. My information is on file there. Order room service, get yourself a nice massage in the morning. Whatever you need.”  </p><p>“Thank you, Terenas.” Jaina tried to sound genuinely grateful. She wasn’t sure if it worked. Terenas was considerably more in-tune than his son was, and they both knew it. </p><p>“Of course. Anything you need, Jaina. Call me at any hour. I’m terribly sorry for all of this.” </p><p>“It isn’t your responsibility to be sorry.” Jaina said quietly. </p><p>“Of course, of course,” Terenas paused for a beat before continuing. “Do try to have a good evening, Jaina. I hope to hear from you soon.” </p><p>“I will. Thank you.” </p><p>The line disconnected, and Jaina sat there numbly for so long she didn’t even realize she was crying until she’d already made a terrible mess of her makeup. </p><p>She half-stumbled to the bathroom to fill the jacuzzi tub with near-scalding water, and left her clothes in a heap on the floor so she could sink down into it once it was full. </p><p>When her phone buzzed in the pocket of her discarded jeans, she nearly ignored it.</p><p>She might have, too. If she didn’t find the prospect of speaking to Arthas worth not having to know that a seventy-year-old man was up in the middle of the night calling hotels and connections, again. </p><p>
  <i>Sylvanas Windrunner</i>
</p><p>Jaina blinked at the name. A name that seemed so far away, right now, before she accepted the call. </p><p>“Jaina?” </p><p>“...Hey.” Jaina’s voice was breathy. Sylvanas’s had been the kind of soft that almost made her break down, again.</p><p>“Are you okay?” </p><p>“I’m fine.” Jaina said just as softly. “I got a room for the night. I’m fine. I’m so sorry about...I didn’t think he’d be so embarrassing. Jaina laughed. She clearly didn’t know what Sylvanas was referencing. </p><p>“The uh...the tint on the bar windows is two-way tint,” Sylvanas explained, sounding a little pensive. “I saw...the sidewalk thing? You seemed upset when you were leaving, and I was just looking and…”</p><p>Sylvanas trailed off while Jaina remained dead silent. No, she hadn’t realized it was two-way tint. She was mortified. </p><p>“Jaina, does he...does he hurt you?” </p><p>“No!” Jaina responded quickly. Emphatically. “No, Sylvanas. Of course, not.” </p><p>Sylvanas let out a breath that trembled as though she’d been holding it for a while.</p><p>“Okay. That’s good.” </p><p>Jaina leaned forward against the edge of the tub and placed the phone down and put it on speaker so she could lay her chin against the tile and let her eyes shut. </p><p>“Thank you for calling.” Jaina whispered. </p><p>“I couldn’t not call,” Sylvanas explained. “I was worried all night. I saw you walk the other way and...I don’t know. I don’t know.” </p><p>“No, it’s...it’s fine. I needed to hear your voice.” </p><p>It was Sylvanas’s turn to run out of words, then. </p><p>“That was weird,” Jaina observed with a breathy, tired laugh. “Sorry.” </p><p>“No. No, it wasn’t weird. I guess I needed to hear yours, too, or I would’ve just texted.”  </p><p>Jaina’s eyes fluttered open, and she looked down at the phone as she sat up a bit in the tub. </p><p>“Can I ask you something, Sylvanas?”</p><p>“Anything.” Sylvanas’s response was so utterly lacking in hesitation, Jaina could only think that she’d meant it.</p><p>“Do you ever regret running?” </p><p>There was hesitation, then. But not the kind that meant avoidance. </p><p>“No.” The answer was soft. Sincere. “I wouldn’t have met Maiev or Valeera. I wouldn’t have the bar. I...I wouldn’t have met you.” </p><p>Jaina’s eyes fell shut and she laid her head back down on the edge of the tub.</p><p>“I wish you were here.” She whispered. </p><p>“Me, too,” Sylvanas responded. Then, “I can stay on with you until you fall asleep. Will that help?” </p><p>“You would do that?” </p><p>“Yeah. Yeah, I would.” </p><p>“I’ll call you when I get dried off, then. I’m in the bath.” </p><p>“I’ll answer.” Sylvanas responded, and Jaina could hear the smile in her voice.</p><p>In the end, she was laying on her side beneath crisp hotel seats with Sylvanas on speaker on the bed next to her. </p><p>They didn’t say anything, really. </p><p>But Jaina could only just make out Sylvanas’s soft breaths on the other end of the line, and the occasional rustle of movement as she moved around the loft to get ready for bed. </p><p>Eventually, Sylvanas’s hearing allowed her to know when Jaina’s own breathing began to soften and even out. </p><p>“Goodnight, Jaina.”</p><p>“Mm, don’t go.” </p><p>“I’m right here.” </p><p>The rustling had stopped.</p><p>Sylvanas was sitting on the edge of her bed clutching her phone tightly as she held it against her ear. </p><p>She stayed on long after Jaina had fallen asleep. </p><p>Just to make sure Jaina wouldn’t be awake when she disconnected the call.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. There's No Way</h2></a>
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    <i>There's no way that it's not going there</i><br/>
<i>With the way that we're looking at each other</i><br/>
<i>There's no way that it's not going there</i><br/>
<i>Every second with you I want another</i><br/>
<i>But maybe we can hold off one sec</i><br/>
<i>So we can keep this tension in check</i><br/>
<i>But there's no way that it's not going there</i><br/>
<i>With the way that we're looking at each other</i>
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</div>Jaina stared blankly at the photo album in front of her as she flipped slowly through the pages with one hand, a third half-finished glass of Merlot in the other.<p>Her wedding album. Endless photos of happier times. Photos of her and Arthas whispering things to each other about uppity wedding guests. Photos of him dipping her down during their dance, much to hear clear and honest appreciation.</p><p>The woman in these photos, Jaina observed passively, is madly, deeply in love. And so is the man.</p><p>She turned another page. The cake.</p><p>Jaina remembered the cake. Arthas was worried about the whole face-smashing thing. Jaina wound up with a very minimal amount of frosting on her nose.</p><p>Arthas got a face-full and laughed about it after. And during. </p><p>Jaina shut the album and took another sip of wine as she glanced at the clock. Nearly ten at night.</p><p>Ten.</p><p>Just like it was their tenth anniversary today, without a single call. Not even a text. </p><p>Jaina’s eyeliner was already smudged beyond hope for repair. Her eyes were already red, too. So it didn't really matter. Nothing really mattered. </p><p>The wine was making her tired. Which was a blessing, really. But it was always better to be safe than sorry, so she poured herself another glass. </p><p>She re-read the text she'd gotten this morning from Terenas.</p><p>
  <i>I do hope your day is a happy one, Jaina. Congratulations.</i>
</p><p>She hadn't bothered to tell him Arthas was already gone when she'd gotten up. Along with his golf clubs and his cleated shoes. </p><p>She'd even checked the garage this morning.</p><p>The golf cart she’d gotten him for his birthday so he wouldn't have to rent anymore was gone, too. There were fresh tire tracks down along the side of the driveway towards the main meeting point of the country club they lived in. </p><p>Menethil Greens.</p><p>Jaina felt a little ill, suddenly, and she closed the album to make her way towards the bedroom with her wine. She opened her phone, then, to her texts with Sylvanas so she could look at the pictures Sylvanas had sent her to brighten her spirits over the past two days. Little birds she'd managed to craft out of orange peels. A rather stunning new drink she'd been working to perfect. One with layers of carefully poured colors. </p><p>Even a rather impressive pyramid of champagne she'd set up for Tux Night. Valeera must have taken the video of her standing up on a stool, double hand pouring each glass in a rather impressive cascade with a bottle of champagne in each hand. </p><p>It had all been a wonderful distraction. Even now, as she lay in bed watching that video again just to focus on the grin on Sylvanas’s face that actually hid a rather deep amount of concentrated skill. </p><p>Eventually, though, she locked her phone and pulled it close to her along with her blankets. </p><p>She didn't sleep, unfortunately. She couldn't. So she was wide awake and on her second bottle of wine when she heard Arthas tossing his golf clubs in the corner of the foyer and grumbling to himself as he made his way towards the bedroom to find Jaina looking at him still holding a half-finished glass of wine where she lay propped against the headboard in bed.</p><p>“Hey.” He greeted her nonchalantly.</p><p>“Hi.”</p><p>He looked around the room for a moment before heading towards the bathroom.</p><p>“Happy anniversary, Arthas.” Jaina said quietly from the bed without looking at him.</p><p>Arthas stopped in his tracks and turned around with a little smile playing at his lips as he slid his shirt off over his head and made his way towards the bed.</p><p>He was already leaned over her by the time she finally looked up at him, and there was suddenly a glass between them as she finished off the rest of her glass all in one go.</p><p>“Can't believe you started without me.” Arthas accused as he began guiding Jaina’s nightgown up along her thighs, all while she looked up at him. He already wasn't looking at her.</p><p>“Ten years.” Jaina whispered. “It's our ten year anniversary. Your gift is on the kitchen counter, by the way. It's that watch you've been looking at for weeks. I got it sized for you. The wine was for us. I finished it just now, I'm truly sorry about that.” </p><p>Arthas’s hands stopped moving then as he tried to figure out exactly what was happening.</p><p>“I'm sorry, baby.” He sighed as he leaned down to nuzzle into the side of her neck. He hadn't shaved today. “Let me make it up to you.”</p><p>Wrong. </p><p>Jaina hated the way his stubble scratched at her skin. She hated the way he smelled. And she hated the way he was pressing against her thigh. </p><p>“Get off me,” Jaina whispered as she sat her glass on the end table. “Go take a shower. You smell like grass and liquor and sweat.”</p><p>“Okay, okay.” Arthas got off the bed quickly, already unbuckling his pants as he hung around the doorway of the bathroom long enough to look back at her. “So...after I shower?”</p><p>Jaina looked at him for a while before getting out of bed and making her way towards the closet to pull some clothes down. Nothing too nice. Just the softest, warmest sweater she had and a pair of well-loved jeans.</p><p>Arthas had already retreated and shut the bathroom door. Over the sound of running water, Jaina ordered a cab while she slid her feet into some flats and went to look at herself in the mirror.</p><p>She did what she could.</p><p>There wasn't much she could do about the puffiness around her eyes or the fact that she looked exactly as wine-drunk as she was. She didn't even put her hair up, which accentuated the slivering strands mixed into the blonde. She just...couldn't care. </p><p>She left a quick-scribbled note on the bed where she'd been laying. </p><p>
  <i>I'm going out. Feel free to charge some porn and a pizza on my card. Happy anniversary.</i>
</p><p>Jaina tossed her Centurion card on top of the note and slung her bag over her shoulder as she went outside to meet the cab. </p><p>Thankfully, she didn't receive any calls or texts from Arthas in the interim and soon enough she was in the back of a cab doing her best to remain as numb as she had been all evening. To the extreme, maybe. Because by the time she got out and shut the door in front of the obviously closed bar, she realized she hadn't even bothered to text Sylvanas.</p><p>
  <i>Hey, it's Jaina. I'm outside. It's cold.</i>
</p><p>Jaina was still pondering all the ways she could've handled that message better when a little light shone through the stairwell and illuminated the bar just enough for her to see Sylvanas’s silhouette against the door as the latch began to turn.</p><p>Sylvanas seemed to be rushing, and Jaina felt a little guilty as she was ushered inside and the door was locked behind her.</p><p>“Where's your jacket, Jaina?” Sylvanas fretted as she slipped her keys into her pocket and reached for Jaina’s upper arms to look at her. “It's supposed to snow tonight and you're wearing flats and a sweater, I…”</p><p>Sylvanas trailed off when the gravity of Jaina’s expression and the tell-tale signs she'd been crying finally sank in.</p><p>“Let's go upstairs.” Sylvanas said, her tone the gentle, soothing balm to her soul that Jaina was used to once again.</p><p>Jaina walked with her side by side up the narrow staircase, leaning into her heavily all the while, yet Sylvanas didn't struggle in the least to keep her balance, unlike Jaina.</p><p>“You're okay. Come here.” Sylvanas murmured as she continued walking Jaina forward with a hand around her waist, guiding her towards a rather desirable looking pile of blankets on the couch. </p><p>A pile of blankets Jaina soon found herself tucked up in while Sylvanas jogged across the loft to get her a glass of water.</p><p>“I'm not a child, Sylvanas. Please.” Jaina whispered with a half-hearted smile as she took the glass from her anyway.</p><p>“I know.” Sylvanas’s voice held nothing but patient understanding as she sat down close to Jaina and reached out to wrap an arm around her. “I'm sorry I didn't come to the hotel the other night.”</p><p>“You should have.” Jaina murmured, her filter utterly decimated.</p><p>Sylvanas went quiet for a moment as she looked down at the coffee table in front of them and then slowly reached up to stroke gently at Jaina’s hair. </p><p>“Your hair is down.” She remarked quietly as Jaina sipped at her water. </p><p>“Please don't look at it. The grey is so obvious when it's down.” Jaina nearly reached up to push Sylvanas’s hand away. She just couldn't bring herself to.</p><p>“It's silver. Not grey.” Sylvanas corrected as her sharp eyes flashed up to look more closely. “It brings out the blue in your eyes.” </p><p>Jaina slowly turned her head so she could look at Sylvanas, who met her gaze readily. </p><p>“I've seen it before, you know. It's lovely.” Sylvanas continued as her hand slowly slipped from Jaina’s hair and the side of her thumb brushed her cheek where there was a barely-there, errant tear streak. “You've been crying.” </p><p>Jaina didn't respond just yet. She was too busy reaching for Sylvanas’s hand to press it more fully against her own cheek.</p><p>Sylvanas’s brow furrowed harder as she shifted closer and cradled Jaina’s face as it pressed into her palm.  </p><p>“Talk to me,” Sylvanas whispered, somehow managing to keep the tremor out of her voice. “Please.” </p><p>“I don't know what to say.” Jaina breathed, letting out a shuddering breath as Sylvanas’s hand slipped to the back of her neck beneath her hair and she was pulled closer. Slowly. Carefully. There was a question somewhere in there. One that Jaina answered by pushing the blankets from around her shoulders and wrapping her arms around Sylvanas almost desperately. </p><p>Sylvanas held her, then. Felt her uneven breaths come out in trembling puffs against the crook of her neck.</p><p>“You smell so good.” Jaina whispered as she dug her fingertips into the soft material of the other woman’s flannel against her back. Nothing like Arthas. No sweat. No distinctly masculine scent that Jaina had never understood the appeal of.</p><p>No, Sylvanas smelled like whatever body wash she’d probably recently used. There was just a hint of the citrus fruits she'd no doubt spent the better part of the evening slicing, too. That was something that took more than a shower to wash away. </p><p>She smelled warm, too. Somehow. Maybe Jaina was just drunk. All she knew was that when Sylvanas spoke and her jaw brushed against Jaina’s cheek, she’d never felt anything so soft. </p><p>“So do you.” Sylvanas remarked after a while. </p><p>Jaina tugged a little harder at Sylvanas’s shirt, gripping it in her hands tightly, now. </p><p>“A little bit like wine and a little bit like perfume I can’t afford.” Sylvanas murmured very near Jaina’s ear with a faint smile. “I like it.” </p><p>Jaina pressed closer. Too close, she realized suddenly. </p><p>This wasn’t a friendship type of hug.</p><p>Friends didn’t hold each other like this.</p><p>Friends didn’t do this.</p><p>But the thought of pulling away was almost physically painful.</p><p>“I’m fucking up.” Jaina whispered into the side of Sylvanas’s neck, her voice breaking a little in the middle. </p><p>“No,” Sylvanas whispered. “No, no you’re not, Jaina. I’m not gonna let you. I promise.” </p><p>“Fuck.” Jaina gasped as she finally pulled away, bringing a hand between them to rest against Sylvanas’s shoulder. “Fuck, I...do you have a shower? Of course, you do. I’m an idiot. Can I just...use it real fast?” </p><p>Sylvanas had let her go immediately and stood to help her up off the couch.</p><p>“Absolutely. C’mon.” Sylvanas walked with her, but she didn’t touch her anymore. Even if she was still battling against all the feelings she’d just tumbled through like briars against her legs. “Here, here.” She was showing Jaina past the divider. Past her embarrassingly unmade bed towards the little bathroom. </p><p>Well. It wasn’t necessarily little. It was actually halfway decent. It even had a tub on the opposite side of the shower that Sylvanas had built out so that she wouldn’t miss her old tub too badly. She pulled down a towel from a rack on the wall next to the sink and rested it on the edge of the basin for Jaina before turning to look at her. </p><p>“I’ll get you something to change into?” She offered quietly, her brows furrowed in worry for a hundred different reasons. “Something soft?” </p><p>“Definitely.” Jaina responded with a soft sigh. </p><p>Sylvanas disappeared immediately to do just that. She dug out a pair of sweatpants that were loose on her and a rather well-worn t-shirt of hers which she carried back to the bathroom with every intention of leaving it just inside the door when Jaina called her name in a tone she couldn’t ignore. </p><p>She took a slow, steadying breath and opened the door further than a crack without looking up. </p><p>“You okay in here?” </p><p>“Can you come here?” Jaina asked over the soft sound of the shower water hitting against her bare skin. </p><p>Sylvanas held the door handle a little tighter as she slowly looked up at Jaina to find the shower curtain drawn open. </p><p>She tried her best not to look at the soft curves of her body. At the way the water rolled across her pale skin on its way down towards the floor of the shower. </p><p>“Jaina…” </p><p>Jaina pressed her lips together and clenched her jaw and looked away, one of her hands coming up to catch at the shower curtain. </p><p>“I’m not going to beg.” Jaina finally managed to say. “I don’t want to.” </p><p>Sylvanas took a single step into the bathroom, finally releasing the door handle as she moved closer to the shower. She was fairly certain her heart was going to crack through her ribs any moment, now. </p><p>“Please don’t make me.” </p><p>The whimper that left Jaina’s throat sounded as though Jaina had tried desperately to keep it at bay. </p><p>And it was that that spurred Sylvanas into action. She kicked her boots off, left her flannel on the floor, and did her best to step out of her jeans before she stepped, instead, into the shower. In her shirt and boxer briefs. Getting absolutely soaked immediately. </p><p>Jaina either didn’t notice or didn’t care, because she was reaching out to grab at the hem of Sylvanas’s shirt the moment she was close enough. </p><p>“You’re too good for this. You’ve been drinking.” Sylvanas breathed as she reached for Jaina’s hands. “Let me wash your hair or something. Just turn around. Please. My shampoo is decent, I-”</p><p>“Don’t you dare tell me I’m too good for this, Sylvanas,” Jaina whispered. “You have no idea why I came here tonight if you believe that.”</p><p>Sylvanas had taken another step, then. Mostly because of Jaina’s incessant pulling. </p><p>At least one of Jaina’s hands released her shirt...only to lift up to rest along the side of her face in an attempt to pull her head closer to her own. </p><p>Sylvanas licked her lips despite the water still running down her face and shook her head faintly as her now-wet hair clung to the sides of her face. “I have every idea why you came here, Jaina.” </p><p>An unexpected tug against her shirt had Sylvanas’s hands landing against the wall on either side of Jaina. </p><p>“Then fucking do it.” Jaina managed to get out as Sylvanas leaned into her when her knees threatened to betray her as Jaina’s hand once again moved to her face and her thumb brushed across the other woman’s lips - pressing up gently. Just enough to expose a fang before Sylvanas tilted her head down and away from that hand towards Jaina’s neck. “Please.” </p><p>Sylvanas shuddered so deeply that Jaina felt it even through the haze she was currently operating in. Then, she let out a breathless, indiscernible sound against Jaina’s neck as her lips grazed it - but only just. </p><p>“Not tonight. I’m not gonna do this to you. Any other night, Jaina. I’d give you anything. Everything. But only if you were sure, and you can’t be sure right now.”  </p><p>It all happened so quickly, Sylvanas was still somewhat confused as she caught Jaina’s weight in her arms and half-tumbled down into the shower floor with her. </p><p>In the next moment, she was doing everything in her power to gather Jaina close enough to herself keep the water from battering her as the first broken sob left her. </p><p>Sylvanas’s knees slipped against the floor a few times as she scrambled to cover her as though that would somehow protect Jaina from the war in her mind. </p><p>“It’s okay.” Sylvanas sputtered as she reached up blindly to shut the water off so she could safely plop down onto the floor of the tub without a direct facial assault from the showerhead above. “Fucking cry, Jaina. Let it out.” </p><p>And god, she did. Her shoulders heaved with Sylvanas’s arms around them as she cried bitterly into her chest and it didn’t matter. Her shirt was already plastered to her, anyway. She wouldn’t have cared, anyway. </p><p>Sylvanas didn’t have any room in her thoughts for anything aside from Jaina and the apologies that kept tumbling from her lips whenever she could manage.</p><p>Apologies that Sylvanas matched with her own, along with soft, repeated reassurances. </p><p>Jaina was already so exhausted it didn’t take long for her to cry herself out. It was a little hard for Sylvanas to get them both up out of the shower floor and get Jaina dried off after she helped her to the edge of the tub, but she managed. She also helped Jaina slide her shirt on over her head and passed her her pants. </p><p>“You look like a drowned rat.” Jaina remarked - the exhaustion she felt seeping into her voice. </p><p>“Yeah, well…yeah.” Sylvanas glanced down at herself and then back at Jaina to find she’d tugged her pants on. “Fuck, just...hang on, okay?” </p><p>“M’not going anywhere.” Jaina breathed as she leaned over her own knees with her head hung against her folded arms. </p><p>Sylvanas returned a moment later in a fresh undershirt and a pair of baggy shorts, and held a hand out to help Jaina up off the side of the tub. </p><p>She kept their fingers twined together as they walked towards the living room, but was met with resistance after a moment. </p><p>“I don’t wanna leave,” Jaina said. “Don’t make me leave.” </p><p>Sylvanas glanced towards the bed, then looked back at Jaina. She didn’t say anything as she changed course towards it. </p><p>It felt so natural to crawl into bed after her. </p><p>It felt so right to pull Jaina into her chest and hold her close with a hand on the back of her head as Jaina tucked her arms between them. </p><p>“I’m never going to make you do anything,” Sylvanas whispered into Jaina’s wet hair. “Ever.” </p><p>“Is it because I’ve been drinking?” Jaina asked quietly after a while. “Is that the only reason?”</p><p>Sylvanas inferred the meaning without having to ask for any further explanation.</p><p>“...Yes.” </p><p>“You must think I’m an awful person.” </p><p>Sylvanas ran her thumb up and down just behind Jaina’s ear, then. “Nothing is ever so black and white. I think you’re a beautiful, kind person in a terrible situation. And I would simply show you some kindness if that’s all I can offer you.” </p><p>Jaina’s eyes were heavy-lidded as she stayed where she was - as close as she could be. She had the distinct feeling that Sylvanas had no idea how significant an offer of kindness was. An offer of real intimacy. Of closeness that she didn’t owe anyone and that wasn’t expected. </p><p>“Get some rest,” Sylvanas whispered, feeling exhaustion seeping deep into her own bones, now. “I’ll be right here.” </p><p>And she was, of course.</p><p>Even when Jaina woke far earlier than Sylvanas ever would have. </p><p>Even when Jaina hurriedly gathered her clothes and put them on and tucked the precious shirt she’d been given to wear in her bag because...because it smelled like her. Like the woman still laying in that bed that could have done whatever she’d wanted to last night, yet still hadn’t. </p><p>The shirt that smelled like the first kindness and consideration she’d felt in years. </p><p>And she cast one last glance at Sylvanas before she hurried down the stairs and opened the app on her phone that would call the cab to get her home and dressed in time to make it to the firm that morning without raising any suspicion. </p><p>Sylvanas, however, would wake up alone - hours later. Cursing herself for her sleeping habits as she looked down at the empty place in her bed where Jaina had been.</p><p>That only lasted a moment, however, before the regret flooded her and she reached for her phone to fire off a text. </p><p><i>I know you’re probably busy with work, but I wanted to apologize. And I wanted to check on you. As a friend.</i> </p><p>They didn’t have to talk about last night. Ever. Sylvanas could handle that. </p><p>What she couldn’t handle, was the thought that she’d fucked this up. This friendship that had come to mean so much to her. </p><p>She waited for a long time for a response that never came, then she slowly lowered her phone onto the bed and lay down next to it. She hated the shudder that ran through her body just before she rolled onto her stomach and hid her face in her pillows. </p><p>Pillows that smelled like perfume she couldn’t afford. </p><p>Pillows that smelled like something she could never have. </p><p>This was so much worse than a hangover.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Push</h2></a>
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  <p><i>She said I don't know</i><br/>
<i>If I've ever been good enough</i><br/>
<i>I'm a little bit rusty,</i><br/>
<i>And I think my head is caving in</i></p>
  <p><i>And I don't know</i><br/>
<i>If I've ever been really loved</i><br/>
<i>By a hand that's touched me,</i><br/>
<i>And I feel like something's gonna give</i><br/>
<i>And I'm a little bit angry</i></p>
</div>Sylvanas was, strangely enough, not in the mood to drink when she finally gave up on getting a response from Jaina.<p>The bar was in need of a little TLC, and she needed to do something with her hands. So, she got herself changed and headed downstairs with a stack of laminate in her hand. </p><p>Some of the tabletops had seen better days, and - thankfully - she kept extra handy tucked away in a storage closet in the loft. </p><p>Yeah. This was better. Stripping away worn, faded laminate and cursing over various things with her sleeves rolled up. It was a mind-numbing, arduous task. In other words, perfect. </p><p>Perfect for not thinking about the ominously silent phone in her back pocket. Not even Valeera had texted her today, but then - she’d taken to spending the days the bar was closed with Tess. The nights, too. Sylvanas was still exceedingly happy for her. </p><p>She just wished...well. She wished Valeera were here with her - picking on her while she worked the day away. Through lunch, even. Through dinner. </p><p>She managed to finish four tables by the time her hands were too sore to keep working, and she looked around at the mess she’d made of the bar that she would have to straighten up before she could do anything else. They’d be open tomorrow, and she didn’t want Valeera to have to deal with. She’d just gotten back from her second trip to the dumpster out back when she saw someone at the door. She didn’t usually make it a habit to open it on days like this, but she was also too soft to stand by that decision.</p><p>Like ever. </p><p>So she moved towards it with her keys in her hand, and...her eyes met Jaina’s through the door. </p><p>She stood like that for a while, and so did Jaina. Just looking at each other. Jaina was in a pencil skirt and a jacket. Matching coat over that, with a black leather messenger bag slung over her shoulder. She must have just gotten out of the office. </p><p>Either way, Sylvanas was hopeful. Relieved, even. She wasn’t sure she’d ever heard from her again - much less see her. Maybe it was that thought that finally made her hands work enough, again, to unlock the door and let Jaina in. </p><p>It was snowing outside. The lapels and shoulders of Jaina’s coat were dusted with it, yet she wasn’t shaking. She seemed used to the cold in a way Sylvanas knew she, herself never would be. </p><p>“You’ve been busy.” Jaina remarked quietly when she saw all the tables moved around and noticed their bright new tops. </p><p>“Yeah.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s voice was hoarse when she spoke. Enough so that she cleared her throat before looking down at her hands. “Yeah, the tables needed re-surfacing.” </p><p>Jaina watched Sylvanas begin to fidget with her keys. She watched the frustration with which she tucked them into her pocket when she noticed what she was doing.</p><p>And then she took a step forward and reached for either side of the other woman’s face to lift it so that their eyes met again. </p><p>“I’m sorry I left this morning.” Jaina whispered with a furrow between her brows. “I’m sorry I didn’t respond to your text.”</p><p> </p><p>“It’s okay.” Sylvanas responded genuinely, still standing there with her hands hanging at her sides. </p><p>“I panicked,” Jaina explained. “I panicked because when I saw you laying there, all I wanted to do was to kiss you. All I wanted to do was know what it’s like to wake up next to and watch your eyes slowly open. I needed to leave because I needed to think. I needed a clear head. I needed to not do what I did last night, again.” </p><p>“I understand.” Sylvanas breathed. A lie. </p><p>“I still want those things.” Jaina’s voice was breathy and barely audible. </p><p>Sylvanas exhaled slowly and bridged the short distance between them to slide her hands beneath Jaina’s coat so that she could loop her arms around her back. </p><p>“Do you?” Sylvanas asked as she tilted her head slightly, and Jaina’s hands slid from the sides of her face towards her shoulders. </p><p>“I want to feel something,” Jaina responded as Sylvanas slowly began working her jacket away from her shoulders before the melted snow could seep down into her clothes. “And I want to feel it with you.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s ears sank back low in a way that made her look rather small, yet there was nothing ‘small’ about the way she was slowly guiding Jaina’s bag from her shoulder and onto her own. There was nothing small about the way she nudged Jaina’s head to the side gently with the bridge of her nose just to breathe her in before she spoke. </p><p>“I’ll make you feel everything.” Sylvanas murmured just beneath Jaina’s ear, and Jaina felt the hair rising along her arms beneath the sleeves of her jacket. “But I’d like to kiss you, first.” </p><p>“Do that, then.” Jaina responded as her hand moved to cradle the back of Sylvanas’s neck. It felt so slender beneath her fingertips. </p><p>Yet there was so much surety in Sylvanas’s touch as she guided Jaina towards her and pressed their lips together for the first time. Not the faintest trace of hesitation, as she kissed Jaina shallowly and delicately. </p><p>It’d been so long since Jaina had kissed a woman. So long, that she’d almost forgotten how heartbreakingly soft it could be. Even when Sylvanas teased at her lips with her tongue, it was so slight. Just a faint brush of wet heat that was gone as quickly as it had come. And it all left Jaina <i>aching</i> by the time Sylvanas pulled back to look at her. </p><p>“Let  me take you upstairs.” Sylvanas sounded breathless when she spoke, and Jaina remembered what it was like to leave someone breathless with real, deep wanting.</p><p>Not some shallow, carnal need to get off. </p><p>“Take me, then,” Jaina responded with an almost-smile. “I would go, either way.” </p><p>“I need to shower,” Sylvanas said halfway up the stairs. “I’ve been working all day.” </p><p>Jaina waited until Sylvanas placed her bag down inside the door to take off her coat and suit jacket. “So have I.” She said as she hung them by the door. </p><p>“You have a bath, right?” </p><p> </p><p>Sylvanas looked at Jaina curiously, then. “I do.” She said, reaching out to toy with one of the cufflinks on Jaina’s dress shirt. “Would you like to share it with me?” </p><p>Jaina couldn’t remember the last time she’d bathed with someone, much less the last time she wanted to. But...she very much wanted to, now. She very much wanted to see the lithe, strong body hidden beneath all those flannels and jeans. </p><p>Mostly, though, Jaina wanted to be close to her. </p><p>And as Sylvanas took her hand walked with her towards the bathroom, she wanted it more with each step they shared until the tub was filling and Sylvanas’s attention was fully focused on her. Suddenly, it was almost too much attention, as Sylvanas’s gaze caught her own while she worked the buttons of her shirt open easily. </p><p>“What’s wrong?” Sylvanas asked as she allowed the backs of her fingers to brush down the front of Jaina’s stomach. </p><p>“Nothing.” Jaina breathed, twitching beneath the touch but not daring to move away. “Nothing, I’m just not used to this.” </p><p>“Relax.” Sylvanas murmured as she guided Jaina’s shirt from her shoulders and leaned in to press a gentle kiss against one of them. Her fingertips were trailing along Jaina’s bare sides towards her lower back, and Jaina let out a trembling breath. </p><p>“I don’t think you understand how good this feels,” Jaina whispered as she tilted her head to the side so Sylvanas’s lips could continue their inward trail towards her neck.  </p><p>“This is nothing,” Sylvanas whispered against the underside of Jaina’s jaw as she traced the line of Jaina’s spine and unhooked her bra in one easy motion. “Promise.” </p><p>“I believe you.” Jaina sighed as she gave the other woman’s shirt a slight tug. </p><p>“My turn?” Sylvanas asked in a murmur against Jaina’s cheek, and Jaina nodded faintly. </p><p>“Please.” </p><p>Sylvanas made a soft, breathy noise and reached for Jaina’s hands to guide them towards her undershirt as she shrugged off her flannel to get it out of the way. </p><p>“Go ahead.” Sylvanas said quietly, looking at Jaina almost searchingly for a moment as Jaina took her in. Just a tank top, then. Her broad, slender shoulders and the tan they sported were on full display. As were other, rather attractive parts of her that Jaina found herself suddenly desperately wanting to see without anything obscuring her view. </p><p>Sylvanas’s stomach was tensed as Jaina drew the hem of her shirt up along it, and Jaina couldn't help but run her fingertips along the faint outline of muscle. Only for a moment, though, before Sylvanas was lifting her arms for Jaina to get her shirt off.</p><p>It wound up on the floor while Jaina’s eyes trailed down at the very new, very unfamiliar and very appreciated sight of Sylvanas’s naked upper body.</p><p>“Oh.” It came out whether or not Jaina wanted it to. A breathy whisper of a word that brought the softest, warmest smile Jaina had ever seen to Sylvanas’s lips. </p><p>“Good ‘oh’?” Sylvanas asked as Jaina trace the underside of one of her breasts carefully. </p><p>“Yeah,” Jaina said with a quiet little laugh. “You’re fucking beautiful.” </p><p>Sylvanas tilted her head and did away with Jaina’s bra, then - leaving it on the floor where her own shirt was already laying. </p><p>“So are you.” She murmured just before she leaned her head down and pressed a single kiss to the top of one of Jaina’s breasts. Sylvanas was working at getting her own jeans undone, then - kicking them onto the floor along with her boots and her usual boxer briefs. “But I really do need a bath. I probably smell terrible.” </p><p> </p><p>“But you don’t,” Jaina responded as she gave her own pencil skirt and heels the same treatment. “You have no clue how good you smell, really.” </p><p>Sylvanas made a soft sound of appreciation but held a hand out to Jaina so she could step into the tub, anyway. A moment later, she was slipping in right behind her so that Jaina could lean back against her. </p><p>So that this didn’t have to be about her. So that it could just be about the closeness and the touching. Whatever Jaina needed, really. </p><p>Jaina relaxed back against her easily. Again, she marveled at how soft Sylvanas was. Especially when she began lathering a washcloth and passed it forward to  Jaina, freeing up her own hands to begin working gently at the tension in Jaina’s shoulders. </p><p>“I would’ve thought you were the type of woman to see a masseuse with a fair amount of frequency,” Sylvanas observed idly as Jaina worked at washing herself off. Her lips joined her hands soon once she’d moved Jaina’s braid in front of one of her shoulders - leaving a trail of warm, lingering kisses everywhere her hands went. “You’re so tense.” </p><p>“Not for long if you keep that up.” Jaina mumbled under her breath as the cloth floated freely away from her hand along the soapy surface of the water. </p><p>“Which part?” Sylvanas asked in a low, breathy tone just behind Jaina’s ear. </p><p>“That one.” Jaina whispered, her hands finding Sylvanas’s thighs when they rose on either side of her and giving them an almost questioning knead before she slid her palms along the slick, silken skin. </p><p>She was so different.</p><p>This was all so different.</p><p>And Jaina was starving for it. </p><p>“This?” Sylvanas breathed into the nape of her neck as she gradually slipped her hands around the front of Jaina’s body - stroking her way slowly from her stomach to cradle her breasts and brush the sides of her thumbs in slow circles over her nipples. </p><p>“Fuck.” Jaina panted, once again holding onto Sylvanas’s thighs. Twice as tight, this time. Tight enough to bruise. </p><p>Sylvanas didn’t care. She was too busy recovering the breath that curse had stolen from her lungs when it fell from Jaina’s lips. </p><p>And then Jaina was reaching for one of her hands to guide it between her own legs, because fuck it. </p><p>Fuck it. </p><p>“Make me come.” Jaina murmured in a low, quivering tone as her head fell back against Sylvanas’s shoulder. </p><p>“You want me to make you come?” Sylvanas asked - her lips moving against Jaina’s cheek as she spoke. “Hm?” As her lips moved, so did her fingers. Slipping through more wetness than should’ve been possible considering they were in the bath - and finding Jaina’s clit effortlessly. </p><p>“Please.” Jaina whimpered the word and arched up against Sylvanas’s hand almost desperately, and Sylvanas wrapped her free arm around her middle to keep her close. </p><p>“I will,” Sylvanas reassured breathlessly. “You don’t have to chase it. Trust me. Relax. That’s it. Let me work for you.” </p><p>That was a big ask. Sylvanas noticed so many things in the following few moments. Like how the muscles in Jaina’s back flexed now and then. And how Jaina’s hand kept hovering over her own.</p><p>“You can rest your hand there if you need to, Jaina,” Sylvanas murmured against Jaina’s ear. “I don't mind.”</p><p>And Jaina did. She slipped her hand beneath the surface of the water and over Sylvanas’s with her own. Yet, she didn't need to guide her. Even if her reflexes told her she did. But there wasn't much time to mull over that.</p><p>She came faster than she would've thought possible just a few minutes ago - shuddering and clutching Sylvanas’s wrist to stop her because she was fairly certain her soul would leave her body if she let her keep going right then.</p><p>“Okay.” Sylvanas whispered, moving her hand away so that she could stroke slowly along Jaina’s inner thighs. “Okay, Jaina. Take all the time you need.” </p><p>Jaina wasn't so far gone that she didn't notice the rapid movements of Sylvanas’s chest against her back. She also noticed the way Sylvanas’s thigh had gone rather tense beneath her free hand. </p><p>She moved to turn around long before she was ready, but Sylvanas stopped her and when Jaina looked sideways at her, she was smiling.</p><p>“It's fine. I'm fine. Later. We can worry about me later.” </p><p>Sylvanas sounded so sincere. So amused, yet in a way Jaina wasn't put off by.</p><p>So Jaina let herself relax again while Sylvanas washed herself off quickly and pulled the plug from the tub. </p><p>Jaina was still a bit dazed as they dried off. She was still having trouble not looking too hard at Sylvanas’s body, which was somehow more stunning now than it had been before. </p><p>But at least Sylvanas seemed to be just as interested in hers, if her glances and flushed face and ears were anything to go by.</p><p>“I hope you don't have any plans tonight.” Jaina remarked as Sylvanas approached her once they were both passably dry.</p><p>“Why’s that?” Sylvanas asked as Jaina hesitated for a moment before looping her arms around her neck. Sylvanas steps forward into Jaina’s arms, and Jaina found the feeling of Sylvanas’s lithe body pressing into her own almost intoxicating. </p><p>“Because I don't either. And that orgasm took a little bravado out of me, so I was hoping to prompt an invitation to your bed.” </p><p>“I thought that's where we were headed.” Sylvanas teased with an impish smile that she followed with a light kiss to the side of Jaina’s mouth as one of her hands came up to cradle her cheek. “I'm gonna take care of you. Don't worry. And I would much prefer having you in my bed than in my tub. But it was nice.”</p><p>“It was.” Jaina agreed, sighing quietly and pulling back to lead Sylvanas towards the bedroom. She kept speaking as they walked. “You don't have to be careful with me, by the way. You don't seem like the always careful type.”</p><p>“I'm not.” Sylvanas responded with a chuckle that Jaina couldn't help but join in on. God, when was the last time she'd laughed in a sexual situation? Had she ever? It felt so fucking freeing. “Just figuring you out.” Sylvanas stopped Jaina from climbing over the edge of the bed with her hands on both her hips. She used that hold to pull them back into her own. </p><p>“The way you like your clit touched was an important piece of information to obtain.” Sylvanas explained in a rather amusing way as she rested her chin on Jaina’s shoulder. “That's a hard one for you to put into words, y’know? As far as how you like to be fucked...well. If I'm not fucking you as hard as you like, feel free to let me know.” </p><p>Sylvanas finally pressed Jaina forward onto the bed - moving over top of her and pinning her hands against the comforter as she rolled her hips against Jaina’s ass. Just once, before she spoke again. Jaina was already arching up against her. “And if it's too much, I need to know that most of all.”</p><p>Jaina was breathing heavily again when Sylvanas released her hands and turned her over beneath herself. </p><p>“Promise me you'll tell me if I do something you don't like.” Sylvanas prompted as she rested some of her weight between Jaina’s thighs when they parted for her. </p><p>“I will. I promise.” </p><p>“That's all I need.” Sylvanas continued as she propped herself up on one of her forearms to free up a hand which she ran along Jaina’s side. “All I need from you is to know that you want whatever it is that I'm doing for you.” </p><p>“Where the fuck did you come from?” Jaina asked as she looked up into Sylvanas’s eyes and reached to run a hand through the soft waves of pale blonde hair framing her face. </p><p>“Some hole in the wall gay bar or something.” Sylvanas’s expression was warm and open when she answered, and it made Jaina smile. </p><p>“You're cute.” Jaina observed. “I feel like you probably know it, too.” </p><p>“What a wild accusation…” Sylvanas drawled before she dipped her head down to draw Jaina into another kiss. A kiss that Jaina found it impossible not to melt into, because everything about the way Syvanas kissed her was utterly disarming. </p><p>It was a little different this time, too. Most notably every now and then, Sylvanas’s fang caught gently against her lower lip in a way that left little doubt as to whether or not it was intentional. As breathless as it left her, however, Jaina found herself enjoying the languid pace Sylvanas had set. </p><p>Maybe because it had been so long since there was anything languid about sex for her. But she wasn’t perfect, and it wasn’t long before she slid her hands up the front of Sylvanas’s body to knead her breasts on the way towards her neck. Once her hands were there, she scratched soft lines into it just beneath Sylvanas’s nape and tilted her had to catch her breath. </p><p>“Why are you so good at this?” Jaina asked as Sylvanas paused, then, to look down at her. </p><p>She thought about the answer for a moment as she pressed Jaina’s thighs towards the bed with her hands on the insides of them. </p><p>“Because I want to be good for you.” She finally settled on, her voice slightly raspy and a little lower than usual.</p><p>Jaina’s brow furrowed in response to that, and Sylvanas lifted a hand to brush her thumb between Jaina’s eyebrows with a soft smile. </p><p>“It’s usually bad form to look worried right before someone goes down on you.”  </p><p>The furrow disappeared, and Jaina slid one of her hands slowly up Sylvanas’s forearm to grip her bicep gently. “Is that what you’re going to do?” </p><p>“That’s what I’d very much like to do right now.” Sylvanas responded without hesitation, her thumb grazing along the apex of Jaina’s thigh in a way that caused her to huff quietly. </p><p>“It’s…” Jaina trailed off and let out a breathy laugh as her eyes rolled and then she looked to the side, allowing her hand to fall away from Sylvanas’s arm. </p><p>“Mm…” Sylvanas frowned and leaned down slowly enough that Jaina began watching her curiously before her lips finally found the front of Jaina’s throat. “Been a while?” Sylvanas continued her earlier hum in a whisper. In the same breath, her thumb had finally trailed a little further and brushed against Jaina’s clit. </p><p>“I think you can probably guess.” Jaina whispered. A whisper that turned into a soft groan when Sylvanas’s thumb slipped lower to tease at her entrance. </p><p>Sylvanas’s lips parted against Jaina’s neck and she allowed her fangs to catch against the soft skin there. Just enough to let them be known. But no marks. Not even the faintest hint. Yet still, Jaina reached to press a hand against Sylvanas’s shoulder. A gentle, subtle warning.</p><p>“I know,” Sylvanas murmured on her way down Jaina’s neck towards her chest. “I’ll be good.” When Jaina looked down into Sylvanas’s eyes, there was almost too much to read in them. Desire. Appreciation. Maybe more. </p><p>“Okay.” Jaina had almost apologized for ruining the mood, but the fact that Sylvanas was kneeling up between her legs and slipping one of her fingers into her shallowly reassured her that she hadn’t. </p><p>It was just a tease. Just a quick downward flicker of Sylvanas’s eyes when she realized how wet Jaina was, followed by the sight of Sylvanas wiping her finger on her own thigh before she leaned over and grabbed something from the nightstand next to the bed. </p><p>A hair tie, Jaina realized, just before she was treated to the sight of Sylvanas tying her hair up quickly and easily as she knelt there between her legs in all her glory. Perhaps for Jaina’s benefit, perhaps not. She did stay there for a moment, though. Stroking along Jaina’s thighs as they rose against her hips all while Jaina’s eyes nothing short of raked over her in the soft moonlight that illuminated her skin. </p><p>“I like the way you look at me,” Sylvanas whispered. “I like the way you want me.” </p><p>“I wanted you  before tonight.” Jaina responded in a low murmur, tightening the grip her thighs had on Sylvanas’s hips before Sylvanas finally began lowering herself down Jaina’s body. </p><p>“I wanted you, too,” Sylvanas admitted against the hollow of Jaina’s hip as she slowly lifted her thighs over her shoulders. “I wanted this. I wanted to make you feel something.” </p><p>Jaina wondered if Sylvanas believed she hadn’t yet made her feel something. She wondered what more Sylvanas really believed she could do...but only until her exploratory kisses moved and slowed until one was placed just above her clit. Only until a long, deft finger slid slowly into her in tandem with the wet heat of Sylvanas’s tongue finally running up and over her clit. </p><p>“Fuck.” Jaina gasped as her hips jerked hard enough that Sylvanas lost her place. She didn’t seem deterred, however. She just nuzzled into the crook of Jaina’s thigh and began pumping her finger as she tried to steady her own breathing. </p><p>“Too much?” She asked - her voice breathless and hot against Jaina’s skin. </p><p>“No.” Jaina husked. “God, no. Your mouth, Sylvanas, fuck. Please.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s lips curved for a split second before she wrapped her free arm around Jaina’s thigh to pull her back down so she could give Jaina exactly what she’d asked her for. And as much as Sylvanas wanted to utterly drown in what Jaina was offering, she took it slow. She drew soft, rhythmic whimpers from Jaina’s lips until her hard-arched back finally rested back down against the mattress and her thighs weren’t quite so tense. </p><p>That was the first time Sylvanas moaned against her, and all that tension nearly flooded back until Sylvanas released her thigh and reached, instead, for her hand. Jaina’s lips parted and she gasped at the feelings assaulted her. The second finger working into her that had joined the first. The soft lips sucking against her clit and the fire that was Sylvanas’s tongue flicking against it when the sucking became too much. </p><p>It was all almost too much, really. But only almost. Sylvanas knew when to pump her fingers harder and when to back off. It took a while for Jaina to realize through the haze of pleasure that those subtle adjustments came each time she arched too hard or tensed to suddenly. </p><p>It was as though Sylvanas could read her body without ever having turned its pages before. </p><p>And then there was the sight of her. Of the way her slender back flexed and her brow furrowed each time she moaned and god, did she moan. Right through Jaina’s clit into the core of her fucking being. Because she was enjoying this. She was gripping Jaina’s hand just as tightly as Jaina was gripping hers in return. </p><p>In the end, Jaina never asked for ‘more’ or ‘harder’. She never had to tell Sylvanas something was too much because it never quite was. </p><p>In the end, her entire body shook and rocked as she came, and Sylvanas moved up along her body as she used her fingers and the palm of her hand and rocked her hips hard to draw the moment out. To make it last as long as she could - all while Jaina clutched so desperately at her back that she would undoubtedly have welts to remind her tomorrow of the way her nails had felt dragging across her skin tonight. </p><p>The way Sylvanas panted against her shoulder as they finally went still seemed so...foreign, almost. Even as heavy as she was breathing, there was a soft edge to her panting. A softness Jaina wasn’t used to, much like all the rest of this. </p><p>She wasn’t entirely sure which one of them was trembling more, yet somehow - Sylvanas had the wherewithal to adjust herself so that her legs were on either side of Jaina’s - allowing her to close them and stretch them straight to relieve the subtle ache in her hips. </p><p>It was that gentle reminder that she was, in fact, a real person and hadn’t ascended to a higher plane of existence that brought Jaina’s attention fully back to Sylvanas just in time to realize Sylvanas was tilting her chin for a kiss.</p><p>Another type of kiss, this time. They had all seemed so different. So wonderful. </p><p>But this one...Oh. Hurried, soft breaths against her lips. Not quite as much poise and practice as before. Raw, almost. </p><p>Jaina liked this kiss the best. She particularly enjoyed the attempts Sylvanas was making to keep her weight off of her until Jaina finally smiled weakly and held her face in her hands. </p><p>“Lay down,” Jaina whispered. “You feel good on top of me. Promise.” </p><p>Sylvanas seemed both relieved and happy to rest for a moment.</p><p>Jaina could have laughed over her concerns if she had the heart. Sylvanas, as toned as she was, wasn’t exactly crushing the life out of her. </p><p>“You’re so small,” Jaina observed, her tone slightly husky as she trailed her fingertips slowly across Sylvanas’s back before finally reaching towards ears that had, thus far, gone ignored.</p><p>“Am I?” Sylvanas asked curiously, though she didn’t seem offended. </p><p>“Does this feel good?” Jaina answered with another question, and with the slow trailing of her fingertips along the undersides of both of Sylvanas’s ears. They flicked faintly against her touch, and Sylvanas’s next exhale shuddered audibly on its way past her lips and into Jaina’s shoulder.</p><p>“Sensitive.” Sylvanas explained simply, and Jaina turned her head so that her lips brushed her ear in the wake of her fingertips. </p><p>“But does it feel good?” Jaina’s breath made that ear twitch again, and Jaina parted her lips to flick the tip of her tongue against it just once. Slowly. </p><p>“Jaina…” Sylvanas’s voice cracked subtly, and Jaina slowly lowered one of her hands from Sylvanas’s ear all the way down her chest towards her breast, and she stroked over the small, supple swell of it fearlessly. </p><p>“Mm?” </p><p>“I really...fuck…” </p><p>“Yeah, you do,” Jaina responded with a chuckle, parting Sylvanas’s slender thighs with her knee and pressing it upwards until she realized just how wet Sylvanas was when she was met with evidence of it at the apex of her thighs. “Is that all that you do, though?” </p><p>Sylvanas’s back arched, and Jaina’s eyes shifted to find that Sylvanas’s were shut and her lips were parted as she drew in a sudden, sharp breath. </p><p>“No.” Sylvanas managed to whisper as one of her hands shot down to Jaina’s hips to hold them still so she could grind her own down against Jaina’s knee. </p><p>“Good,” Jaina whispered, somehow. It was getting difficult to form coherent thoughts right then. “I, um...it’s been a long time since I slept with a woman. I hope you’ll let me try.”   </p><p>“You can do whatever you want to to me, right now.” Sylvanas meant that with every aching fiber of her being. But just in case, she let go of Jaina’s hip anyway just to be sure she knew.</p><p>Jaina took that opportunity to sit up and lean back against the headboard, and Sylvanas allowed herself to be guided into straddling her lap easily. She settled down against Jaina slowly while Jaina slid her hands along her body from her hips to her shoulders, marveling all the while at her soft beauty. </p><p>“You like kissing.” Jaina murmured distractedly as she folded her hand against Sylvanas’s stomach and trailed it slowly downward. </p><p>“I like kissing you,” Sylvanas responded. “Very much.” </p><p>Jaina’s hand shifted lower and slipped between Sylvanas’s thighs. “Do you know what I like?” </p><p>Sylvanas let out a shuddering breath when Jaina finally slipped one of her fingers into her, slow and deep as anything, and she reached for Jaina’s shoulders to hold them. “Mm?” </p><p>“I like the way you look at me, too.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s thighs were already trembling as Jaina panted softly and pressed a second finger in beside the first before curling them in an almost questioning manner. She was more than a little encouraged by the way Sylvanas shuddered and rocked her hips down in response. Even more encouraged by the soft blue-grey glow of the eyes focused on her own. </p><p>“Like you aren’t afraid to see me,” Jaina whispered. “Is this good?” </p><p>“Yeah,” Sylvanas’s voice was rough and breathless, yet she was still stroking the nape of Jaina’s neck with her thumb. “Keep going.” </p><p>Jaina glanced down as she positioned the heel of her palm against Sylvanas’s clit when she noticed the way her hips were shifting forward so subtly - looking for friction that hadn’t been there before, but was now. Blissfully so. </p><p>Jaina thought to herself as Sylvanas’s movements grew more jerky and desperate that this was somehow better, even, than everything Sylvanas had done for her. And as much as she enjoyed the fact that Sylvanas very much cared to <i>see</i> her, when she could no longer keep her eyes open for the pleasure - Jaina enjoyed that just as much, if not more. </p><p>“I’m gonna come.” Sylvanas gasped as her head fell forward against Jaina’s shoulder. She was clinging tightly, now. One hand holding Jaina’s braid and the other grasping at her shoulder as her open-mouthed pants ghosted hard against Jaina’s flushed skin. “P...please…” </p><p>Jaina curled her fingers harder as a rush of confidence washed over her, and her free hand came to wrap around Sylvanas’s tensed back. “Say my name.” Jaina breathed against Sylvanas’s ear. “When you come. Say my name.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s hips jerked as Jaina’s low-spoken words washed over her and the pit in her stomach grew tighter until it was all-consuming. She managed. Jaina’s name fell from her lips a few times, actually. A syllable at a time. Barely discernable from her soft whimpers and breathless groans that ended somewhere in her throat. </p><p>For a while, Sylvanas was still in Jaina’s lap - her ribs heaving beneath Jaina’s gentle hands. Her thighs trembling against Jaina’s sides. </p><p>Jaina had slept with women before. A long time ago. Maybe she’d forgotten what it felt like, or maybe it had never felt like this at all. The utter calm of holding Sylvanas and sharing what felt like too little air for a while. The feeling of...feeling small, yet equal, because despite how open and vulnerable Jaina felt, Sylvanas felt just as raw in the way she was breathing and digging the pads of her fingers into Jaina’s back. </p><p>“Let’s lay down.” Jaina suggested gently once it seemed they’d both caught their breath adequately enough to move. </p><p>Jaina slowly made her way under the covers with Sylvanas, who stayed close to her all the while. They shared a few more touches. Soft ones that went nowhere, yet meant everything in those moments. A few more kisses. Another new kind of kiss, now. </p><p>The kind where Sylvanas was fighting sleep and her aim was a little off. But Jaina didn’t mind. She just stroked through Sylvanas’s hair and smiled each time a sleepy kiss found her shoulder or her jaw.  </p><p>“Just sleep.” Jaina finally breathed into Sylvanas’s hair as she tucked herself closer. </p><p>“I don’t wanna miss anything.” Sylvanas whispered against Jaina’s chest. </p><p>“You won’t,” Jaina reassured, and if she said anything else - Sylvanas wasn’t awake to hear it. </p><p>She was cursing herself the moment she was aware the next morning. Fully prepared to wake up and find her bed as empty as it had been the prior morning. Fully prepared to be angry with herself for not waking earlier, or staying up later. </p><p>“Wake up.” Jaina’s voice was a whisper, and Sylvanas made a soft noise in response to the warmth of Jaina’s hand coming to rest along the side of her face. </p><p>Jaina watched as Sylvanas’s eyes fluttered open in surprise. Her hair was re-braided, and still damp from the shower she’d taken while she let Sylvanas sleep. </p><p>“You’re here.” Sylvanas croaked before clearing her throat and reaching up to cover Jaina’s hand with her own. She looked almost lost, she was so confused.</p><p>But god, she was gorgeous in the morning light that filtered in through the curtains Jaina had opened. Her hair was a mess. Her skin held the glow of the sun like it was made to. </p><p>“I told you I wanted to know what it was like to watch your eyes open in the morning.” Jaina explained - sounding as though she’d been awake considerably longer than Sylvanas had. </p><p>Sylvanas, who had kicked the sheets off of everything but one leg sometime during the night. Sylvanas, who very much appreciated Jaina’s hand running along the sun-warmed skin of her body. Until she saw the look on Jaina’s face. How heartbreakingly sad it was. </p><p>“Sylvanas…I...you deserve better than this.” </p><p>“No,” Sylvanas breathed without hesitation, pulling Jaina’s hand up to her face so she could press a kiss to her palm before she looked back up at her. “No, but you do.” </p><p>Jaina licked her lips and tried to smile. She just couldn’t quite seem to. “I have work today.” Jaina whispered, and Sylvanas nodded. </p><p>“Lawyers do tend to work during the day. It’s okay.” Sylvanas reached out to pull Jaina down into a quick, soft kiss before she moved to sit up and head towards the dresser on the other side of the room. While Jaina pulled a fresh shirt and underwear out of her messenger bag, Sylvanas tugged on a fresh pair of briefs and an undershirt. </p><p>“Um…” Sylvanas trailed off - not turning to look at Jaina as she drummed her knuckles against the dresser. “I don’t...I don’t know where to go from here.” </p><p>The rustling of clothes coming from Jaina’s direction stopped for a moment before the sound of approaching heels against the floorboards filled the silence. </p><p>“Neither do I.” Jaina admitted, looking down at Sylvanas’s hand on the top of the dresser for a moment before reaching out to give it a gentle squeeze. “Don’t be afraid to text me.” She whispered. “He barely knows I exist. He has no idea who I am. What I do.” </p><p>Sylvanas let out a breath that shuddered so hard on its way out, that Jaina frowned and slipped her hand to wrap around Sylvanas’s wrist. </p><p>“I thought...I figured you just wanted…” </p><p>“I wouldn’t have been here this morning, Sylvanas,” Jaina countered quietly, and Sylvanas finally turned to look at her. “I told you I was fucking up.” Jaina tried to laugh, but it was a rather hollow gesture - and Sylvanas reached out to finish buttoning her shirt for her. </p><p>“I think this qualifies as both of us fucking up,” Sylvanas responded with a weak smile. “You text me, yeah?” </p><p>“I will.” Jaina said, almost so quietly that Sylvanas was glad they were so close, or she might not have heard her. </p><p>And then, far too soon, Jaina was gone, and Sylvanas was sitting on the edge of her bed as Valeera stared at Jaina’s car from the alleyway outside, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open. </p><p>Sylvanas wasn’t alone for long, as it turned out. Her head darted up in response to the sight of movement at the door to her loft - where she watched Valeera shut the door with her hip, a tray of coffee in one hand and a bag of what smelled like breakfast in the other. </p><p>“Uh...morning.” Sylvanas greeted. </p><p>“We were supposed to do the tables today…” Valeera began as she sat the food down on the kitchen counter and pulled plates down from one of the cabinets for them. “You started without me.” </p><p>“Still plenty left to do.” Sylvanas responded - though her eyes were narrowed in suspicion. </p><p>“Don’t look at me like that.” Valeera teased as she carried their breakfast over towards Sylvanas’s bed on a tray. “Are lawyers good in bed?” </p><p>Sylvanas went red all the way to the tips of her ears, and Valeera passed her her coffee before she turned her attention to unwrapping her sandwich. </p><p>“Don’t be all weird about it.” Valeera accused. “I’m just glad the woman finally had an orgasm, to be honest.”</p><p>“Valeera, can we just not talk about it? Please?” Sylvanas hadn’t even taken a sip of her coffee, yet. Her heart was too busy trying to pound its way out of her chest. </p><p>“We don’t have to talk about it, but it’s important that you know I love you, I’m here for you, and I would never judge you for jack shit.” </p><p>“That was...terribly sweet and out of character for you.” Sylvanas complimented, finally managing a sip of her coffee. </p><p>“Thanks, did you wear the sexy underwear? The paisley briefs? I really like those.” </p><p>Sylvanas sighed heavily while Valeera chuckled into her chicken biscuit, clearly more than a little pleased with herself.</p>
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</div>“Jaina?”<p>Jaina glanced up from her desk at Arthas impassively, not even bothering to put her pen down as he rested a hand on the doorframe. </p><p>“You didn’t come home last night.” </p><p>“Hm.” Jaina frowned in thought and reached over to flick the screen of her phone open to their security app. She held it up for Arthas to see that there was no activity at the door the prior night, then locked the screen again and placed her phone back down. “Neither did you.” </p><p>Arthas stood there for a moment before he tried again. “I was at Dad’s with the junior partners. We drank a little too much to drive.” </p><p>“Did you?” Jaina asked, her attention now almost fully focused back on her work. “Odd. You drive drunk all the time.” </p><p>Again, Arthas was quiet. For a while at least.</p><p>“Jaina, I’m sorry about our anniversary. Please come home, tonight.” </p><p>“I’m working, Arthas.” Jaina said quietly as she reached for a nearby spool of white-out tape. </p><p>The next time she looked up, he was gone. </p><p>“Fuck you.” She whispered under her breath for no one in particular. </p><p>Or maybe for herself. </p><p>Maybe - finally - for herself.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Shock To Your System</h2></a>
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    <i>You got a shock to your system</i>
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    <i>Pull yourself out of it</i>
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    <i>I know that shock to your system</i>
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    <i>Knocked your heart right out of sync</i>
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</div>Sylvanas looked at herself in the mirror she'd been standing in front of for a good ten minutes now, turning this way and that as she carefully inspected her paisley briefs from every angle she could manage.<p>She was currently looking over her own bare shoulder at the reflection of her ass when she caught sight of the worst imaginable thing she could've possibly caught sight of.</p>
<p>“Seriously?” Valeera asked from the doorway of the loft as Sylvanas turned her head back around to look at her properly.</p>
<p>“I hate you.” Sylvanas said in an exhale as Valeera rolled her eyes and scooped a shirt out of an open dresser drawer on her way past that she promptly threw at Sylvanas's face.</p>
<p>“Cover your tits, Calvin Klein, it's pizza night.” </p>
<p>“I thought you liked my tits.” Sylvanas complained half-heartedly as she tugged the shirt on over her head and followed the smell of pizza and the sight of cold beer to the couch Valeera was plopping down on.</p>
<p>“Yeah. So it'd be a shame to like lose them in a tragic pizza sauce incident or something.” Valeera countered, popping the pizza box open as Sylvanas went to work popping the caps off their beers.</p>
<p>“That sounded forced. It's because your girlfriend is stacked, isn't it?” Sylvanas’s voice was convincingly nonchalant, and Valeera’s ears pressed back immediately.</p>
<p>“She's not my girlfriend.”  Valeera mumbled around a bite of pizza while she flipped through channels to find something to watch.</p>
<p>Sylvanas was sipping her beer. It usually took a little while for her to wind down enough after a rough shift to want to eat, but she'd appreciate the pizza soon enough.</p>
<p>“You spend like every Sunday night with her.” Sylvanas pointed out. “You're like...always with her, actually.”</p>
<p>“...Yeah.” Valeera agreed before pulling her legs up into the couch and looking down at the bottle in her hand. “Well, she's not my girlfriend. That shit stresses me out.”</p>
<p>“I know it does.” Sylvanas offered with a soft smile as she reached out and tweaked Valeera’s ear gently. “But maybe she's different. It seems different to me, from the outside in.”</p>
<p>“Sure. And maybe that's the scary part.” Valeera countered easily. “Maybe she's so different that I'm starting to think she might not leave if it gets serious.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas didn't argue with Valeera in regards to her idea of ‘serious’. She just pulled a blanket down from the back of the couch and covered both their laps with it as she turned her attention to the TV and finally got herself a slice of pizza. “Not everyone is going to leave you, Valeera.”</p>
<p>“You aren't ‘everyone’, Syl.” Valeera explained with a shrug as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. “You're different.” </p>
<p>“I just want you to be happy.” Sylvanas said after a moment, drawing Valeera’s attention to herself.</p>
<p>“See.” Valeera prodded as she let her head fall back against the couch. “You're different.”</p>
<p>“It took you a long time to realize I'm always going to be here for you. To believe it.” Sylvanas reminded gently as she met Valeera's gaze. </p>
<p>“I guess.” Valeera sighed and leaned forward for another slice of pizza. “What about you and Legally Blonde, though?”</p>
<p>“What about it, exactly?”</p>
<p>“Like...when people fuck around it usually doesn't consist of a morning after. When it's just fucking, I mean. So...what is it?” </p>
<p>Sylvanas placed her pizza crust back in the box, and Valeera eyed it suspiciously before handing Sylvanas another slice. It was a chore getting her to eat some nights. She worked herself sick, sometimes. </p>
<p>“That's all it is.” Sylvanas said quietly with a shrug. “It's…” Sylvanas’s thoughts wandered, then. Her mind told her that Valeera was right. It was a logical assumption. “I just think she's unhappy. Not on some superficial level. Deeply. The kind of unhappiness that rots you from the inside out. And I've never wanted to fix something that was broken so badly in my life.”</p>
<p>“You can't fix another person.” Valeera said matter-of-factly. </p>
<p>“I don't think she needs to be fixed. I don't think she's what's broken.”</p>
<p>“This doesn't sound like it's about sex…” Valeera’s voice was low, and Sylvanas finally noticed she'd turned the volume of the TV almost all the way off at some point. </p>
<p>Sylvanas was quiet for a long time as Valeera found a lock of her hair to toy with in a way that always seemed to soothe her. </p>
<p>“Am I a bad person, Valeera?” Sylvanas suddenly asked in a whisper, her eyes focused on the blanket between them. </p>
<p>“No,” Valeera responded immediately. “You know how I feel about this shit. Heteronormativity and whatnot. I bet she was supposed to have babies, too or some shit. And I bet she would have already if she wanted to. Are you going down some ‘sanctity of marriage’ spiral on me, right now?”</p>
<p>“I don't know.” Sylvanas breathed as her head flopped back and she stared at the open ductwork above them. </p>
<p>“There's no such thing,” Valeera stated, as though it should have been obvious. “That's just a bunch of religious bullshit. Loving someone has nothing to do with accepting a lifetime of bullshit to avoid going to hell. If I believed in marriage, I'd want my wife to be with me because she chose to every single day. And I'd wanna make that choice easy as often as I could. If she felt cared about she probably would've been home the other night, right? So how few fucks does he actually give about her that it finally got to this point? Yet you have to ask me if you're the bad person for giving her something she's dying for?”</p>
<p>Sylvanas lifted a hand quickly to wipe at her cheek and finally looked over at Valeera as the younger woman pushed some of her hair behind her ear for her when it fell against her face. </p>
<p>“I don't think it's going to be a one-time thing.” Sylvanas explained. “I don't think I want it to be a one-time thing, either.”</p>
<p>“That's okay,” Valeera responded with a soft smile as she pulled Sylvanas over and made her lean into her side. Her attention turned back to the TV as Sylvanas rested her head against her. “I'm not gonna judge you for this one. The guy stared at my ass in front of his wife. He can go die or something.”</p>
<p>“That's mean, Valeera.” Sylvanas chided quietly after a sip of beer. </p>
<p>“Maybe. But I meant it.”</p>
<p>“I know.”</p>
<p>---</p>
<p>Jaina held her phone to her ear as she listened to the quiet of her house beyond her office doors. The ringing seemed so loud in comparison until it stopped.</p>
<p>“Proudmoore Residence.” Jaina swallowed thickly at the familiar sound of their butler, and cleared her throat when she realized her voice might catch, otherwise. </p>
<p>“Hello, Cyrus. Is Mother available?”</p>
<p>“Jaina! Oh, it's good to hear your voice. Of course, of course. She's in the study, I'll fetch her for you right away.”</p>
<p>Jaina smoked despite the unease she was feeling. </p>
<p>“Thank you, Cyrus.”</p>
<p>There was a moment of quiet as the call was transferred to her mother’s phone. A moment for Jaina’s nerves to nearly get the better of her. </p>
<p>“Jaina? It's so late…”</p>
<p>“I know, I know. I'm sorry, Mother. I just needed to talk to you.” Jaina glanced at the clock worriedly. It would be nearly eleven back home, and she felt a faint tinge of guilt as she toyed nervously with a pen laying on her desk.</p>
<p>“Oh, that's alright. It's no matter. Is something wrong, darling?” </p>
<p>Jaina froze. For some reason, she hadn't really thought this far ahead. </p>
<p>“I wanted to talk to you about...uhm...my marriage, I guess.”</p>
<p>It was Katherine’s turn to go quiet for a while before she answered. “Again, Jaina, is something wrong?”</p>
<p>Jaina felt her eyes welling up, already. She considered dropping the call as she stood from her chair and wrapped her free arm around her stomach. </p>
<p>“A lot is wrong.” Her voice had a tremor to it. An audible one.</p>
<p>Katherine sighed.</p>
<p>“Well, darling, marriage is a difficult thing to navigate...you are both young, yet. I'm sure-”</p>
<p>“I'm nearly forty.” Jaina cut her off, albeit quietly. “And...and Father never treated you the way Arthas treats me.” </p>
<p>Katherine cleared her throat and Jaina could hear her adjusting her seat. She was probably on the couch in the study with a glass of brandy in her free hand. </p>
<p>“Your father and I had our trials just like any other couple. I doubt this is any different.” Katherine chided, though it was obvious to Jaina she was attempting to sound sympathetic.</p>
<p>“I remember Father kissing you before he went to work when I was home from boarding school on vacation. I remember the two of you going to the ballet or something similar every weekend. I remember roses and gifts and I remember the two of you laughing together. I also know that you miss him terribly. Mother, I...I wouldn't miss Arthas if he were gone.”</p>
<p>Jaina’s voice was nearly a whisper when she finished, and Katherine was holding her phone just a little tighter in her hand. She went ahead and finished off her brandy. Jaina heard her place the glass down in the span of silence that followed her rant.</p>
<p>“It can't be as bad as all that, can it?” Katherine asked gently, though there was the faintest hint of concern in her voice.</p>
<p>The guilt was back, then. Jaina considered a quick 'you're right, it’s fine’ before she decided against it.</p>
<p>“Sometimes when I'm driving home after a late night at the office, I imagine it wouldn't be so terrible if a car veered into my lane.” Jaina was talking so quietly it was as though she was scared someone might hear, despite the fact that she knew there was no one home aside from herself. “I...I wouldn't have to go home, then. I wouldn't have to navigate all the terrible things that are waiting for me when I get there.” </p>
<p>Jaina regretted saying any of that the moment she stopped speaking. Both because she'd said it all to her mother, and because she'd admitted it to herself. Made it real. And she regretted it more with each moment of silence that passed between them.</p>
<p>“I'm sorry, Jaina.” Katherine finally said. “Truly. How did it come this? How did things get so terrible for you?”</p>
<p>“It's not a recent development. It's been getting worse for years. He...he's changed so much. He's like a walking stereotype. He treats me like something to be pawed over and forgets I have the weight of the world on my shoulders.”</p>
<p>“Well, people change, Jaina. I'm sure you've changed, too. Perhaps you should tell him you're feeling this way. If he knew that you were maybe things would be different.”</p>
<p>Jaina stared down at the pen in her hand that she hadn't realized she'd broken until now as Katherine spoke, and she willed herself back under the weight and the secrets she was drowning beneath. “You're right, of course.” She said quietly. “I'll talk to him.”</p>
<p>“That's good, Jaina. I'm glad you called. Please call me again if you need anything.”</p>
<p>“Of course. Goodnight, Mother.” Jaina listened for a while after Katherine disconnected the call, and then finally lowered her phone as she lay her head down on the hard leather writing surface of her desk. </p>
<p>---</p>
<p>Sylvanas ran her thumb across the image framed in silver that she'd pulled out of the top drawer of her nightstand - and eyes that mirrored her own looked right back at her. </p>
<p>This had always been her favorite picture of Lireesa. She'd been a little younger when it was taken. Sylvanas hadn't even been born yet, actually. But she was so beautiful looking up from her book while her father drew a smile out of her from behind the camera. </p>
<p>Sylvanas has always imagined her mother likely laughed just after this photograph was taken. Aravath had always made her laugh. Always. </p>
<p>“What would you say to me right now?” Sylvanas asked the silent image quietly as the snow that was falling outside danced rhythmically against the windows of the loft while the wind blew it in swirls. “Would you think badly of me? Would you be angry?”</p>
<p>There was no answer. Just like every other night. But Sylvanas held the frame a little tighter as she called to mind the sound of Lireesa’s voice. The warm acceptance that had always radiated from her - even when Sylvanas knew she'd fucked up royally. Maybe especially then. </p>
<p>No, Lireesa wouldn't think that. Lireesa would probably just want to meet her. </p>
<p>“You would have liked her,” Sylvanas whispered as she slowly drew the photograph against her chest and held it there in her arms while her eyes slid shut as she leaned her head back against the headboard of her bed. “You would have liked Valeera, too.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas took a moment to gather her thoughts and then let out a deep shudder of a breath before her eyes opened again and she looked out the windows.</p>
<p>“I miss you.” She whispered to the silent room. “I really need you right now.” </p>
<p>A while later, the photograph was tucked away safely once more, and Sylvanas was shuffling towards the kitchen, her sweats tied loosely so that they hung around her hips, and her shirt still smelling just a little like Valeera’s perfume. Which made sense, considering Valeera had fallen asleep on her for a while before finally deciding she wanted to go home for the night. Or maybe to Tess’s. Which seemed like the most likely option, considering it was the dead of winter and she hadn't asked to borrow Sylvanas’s car. </p>
<p>By the time she got back to her bed with a bottle and a glass, her phone was illuminated with a couple message notifications. Her brow furrowed when she realized how ridiculously late it was, and she immediately worried for Valeera as she scooped her phone up and slid the screen open. </p>
<p>...Jaina. At two in the morning. </p>
<p><i>I hope I’m not waking you. I just wanted to talk.</i> </p>
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    <b>I’m up. Actually up this time.</b>
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    <b>Any time.</b>
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<p>Sylvanas abandoned her bottle on the nightstand by her bed in favor of climbing under the covers and leaning against the headboard. By the time she was settled, her phone was ringing. She answered quickly, though she didn’t know why her stomach felt like it was doing somersaults. She couldn’t decide if she was concerned, or if she was just excited at the prospect of hearing from Jaina. </p>
<p>“Syl?” Jaina’s voice was soft, but not hushed. That fact alone gave Sylvanas a little sense of relief. “Sorry. Is it okay if I call you that?” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Sylvanas responded with a breathy laugh. “Yeah, definitely. Valeera calls me that, too. Are you okay?” </p>
<p>“I’ve been better?” Jaina responded in more of a question than an answer. “Nothing serious. I just...I was an idiot and thought I could talk to my mother about things. I was just as wrong this time as I was last time.” </p>
<p>“I’m sorry.” Sylvanas murmured gently into the receiver. “You can tell me about it if you want.” </p>
<p>“It’s fine. Really. I wanna talk about you.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas’s eyes flashed towards the window as she pulled the blankets a little further up her body. She thought of ways to turn the conversation back around, until she finally realized that maybe this was what Jaina needed, or she wouldn’t have called. </p>
<p>“Okay.” Sylvanas finally said. “My, uh...my mom’s been gone for a while but I still talk to her. My conversations probably go better than yours do.” </p>
<p>Jaina chuckled quietly on the other end of the line. “I’m sure. I bet your mom was beautiful.” </p>
<p>“Yeah. Yeah, she really was.” Sylvanas agreed quietly. </p>
<p>“What was she like?” </p>
<p>“Warm,” Sylvanas responded simply, at first. “She loved us so much. I had a baby brother and sister, and one older one. Lirath, Vereesa and Alleria. Lirath looked just like Dad. So do Vereesa and Alleria, really. She was the type of parent that like...wanted you to excel, but not to the detriment of yourself. I was always allowed to make mistakes. I wasn’t scared to talk to her.” </p>
<p>Jaina inferred so much from what Sylvanas said. There was so much loss and heartache to be read in-between the lines that she felt a little stunned. </p>
<p>“She sounds wonderful.” She managed to say after a moment or two of thought. </p>
<p>“Yeah, um...hey, are you alone?” Sylvanas asked, sounding almost overly-conscious, suddenly, of their situation. </p>
<p>“I am,” Jaina reassured quickly. “He’s out tonight.” </p>
<p>“Okay. Hang on.” </p>
<p>There was a quick rustling, then, followed by a tone that told Jaina Sylvanas was requesting to FaceTime her. She accepted in a bit of a panic, wishing she was wearing something other than an old t-shirt. </p>
<p>She didn’t feel so bad, though, when Sylvanas seemed otherwise occupied. In fact, everything was a blur on her end as Jaina listened to the sound of a drawer being opened. </p>
<p>“Whatever you’re doing, I can’t see. I don’t have special eyes like you do.” Jaina teased as she looked at the screen of her phone with a small smile and adjusted her glasses against the bridge of her nose. “I’m half blind even with the lights on. I have <i>old</i> eyes.” </p>
<p>“You have beautiful eyes.” Sylvanas corrected nonchalantly as she leaned over and clicked the bedside lamp on.</p>
<p>Sylvanas smiled as she sat back up and looked down at Jaina. “I like you like that a lot, actually.” </p>
<p>“Like what?” Jaina asked almost derisively, as though that was the most ridiculous opinion she could’ve had. </p>
<p>“The glasses, your hair being down. Everything. Don’t get me wrong, I’m quickly developing a pencil skirt kink, but...I don’t know. You look so soft right now. Anyway, here.” </p>
<p>Jaina watched as Sylvanas lifted up a little picture frame, and she drew her phone closer to her face until the photograph came into focus. </p>
<p>“You have her eyes,” Jaina remarked softly. “She was as stunning as you are.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas hummed quietly in the back of her throat as she stowed the picture back away where it had been and looked down at her screen. She could’ve ended the video call, but she didn’t. They both seemed much more inclined to stare at each other than to go back to a regular phone call. </p>
<p>“I miss you.” Jaina suddenly said before biting her lower lip and looking away. “I shouldn’t have said that.” </p>
<p>“It’s okay,” Sylvanas said as she shifted around in bed and leaned forward more out of instinct than anything else. “I mean...you don’t have to worry about what you say with me. And it’s okay if you miss me. Especially if you’re just being honest.” </p>
<p>“I don’t have a problem being honest with you,” Jaina said with a little half-smile. “I find it much more difficult to be honest with myself.” </p>
<p>“Understandable. I think most people are like that. So, was this a sudden epiphany? The fact that you miss me?” </p>
<p>Jaina rolled her eyes and smiled as she curled up further into the armchair she was in and shook her head. “No.” She admitted with a little shrug. “No, I think you’re a very easy person to miss.” </p>
<p>“So are you.” Sylvanas murmured almost earnestly. “I miss you, too.” </p>
<p>Jaina only managed to look at Sylvanas for a moment longer before she had to look away, and Sylvanas’s ears wilted as she noticed a slight glint in Jaina’s eyes in whatever soft lamplight she was sitting in. </p>
<p>“Don’t be upset.” Sylvanas urged quietly. “Please. We don’t have to do this, you know. Remember, I can be whatever you need me to be. Even if that’s just a friend.” </p>
<p>“Absolutely not,” Jaina whispered, and Sylvanas watched the muscles in Jaina’s jaw clench as she seemed to gather herself before looking at her again. “I’m not afraid of what’s happening between us, Sylvanas. And I’m not going to let it go unless you need me to.” </p>
<p>“No.” Sylvanas responded quickly, hating the tingle that ran along her scalp from the nape of her neck at the mere thought. “Fuck, no, that’s the last thing I need.” </p>
<p>“Then don’t be so self-sacrificing about it.” Jaina’s voice was gentle in a way that softened those words. “I don’t want to think you’re doing anything at all for my benefit.” </p>
<p>“I’m not.” Sylvanas said with a sigh. “That’s not what this is.” </p>
<p>“Okay.” Jaina pressed her lips together as she ran her thumb along the side of her phone, watching as Sylvanas looked down at her lap for a moment before her eyes gradually lifted back up. </p>
<p>“God,” Jaina breathed as she leaned her forehead against the top of her phone for a moment and then slowly moved until she was curled on her side with her head on the arm of the chair. “I wish I were there with you right now.” </p>
<p>“Can you come this weekend?” Sylvanas asked quietly. “Just for a little while?” </p>
<p>“Maybe sooner.” Jaina responded with a faint shrug and an apologetic smile. “I don’t think I can make it to this weekend without seeing you.” </p>
<p>“Oh.” Sylvanas smiled a goofy, uncontrollable smile that had Jaina grinning at her phone. “Sooner’s good. I like sooner.” </p>
<p>“So do I.” Jaina said. “Tomorrow?” </p>
<p>“That’s... yeah. Yeah, tomorrow’s perfect.” </p>
<p>“Alright. Tomorrow, then.” </p>
<p>Even with the conversation over, neither of them ended the call. Sylvanas lay back down in bed and turned on her side to watch as Jaina made her way across her living room to the couch and got herself bundled up for the night. </p>
<p>She thought, randomly, that Jaina’s house was beautiful. A beautiful place to feel trapped in.</p>
<p>“I should go,” Jaina said once she’d turned off the lights and focused her attention back on the screen of her phone. “I’d rather be asleep than awake when he gets home.”    </p>
<p>“Are you okay?” Sylvanas asked suddenly before Jaina could hang up. “With what happened?” </p>
<p>Jaina paused. She hadn’t really even asked herself that question. </p>
<p>“I cheated on my husband,” Jaina responded with a faint shrug. “And I’m going to cheat on him again. With someone who makes me feel something for the first time in years. I think that if I hadn’t met you I might have lost myself, entirely. So...no. No, I’m not okay with all of that as a whole, but I’m okay with what happened between us. I just wish it had happened differently.”</p>
<p>“How so?” Sylvanas asked quietly. </p>
<p>“I think we could have been…” Jaina trailed off and sighed. “I just wish. Fuck, I’m just tired. Goodnight, Sylvanas.” </p>
<p>“Me, too,” Sylvanas responded. “To both things. Goodnight.” </p>
<p>The moment Jaina finally slipped her phone beneath her side, she heard Arthas at the front door. She didn’t bother to pretend to be sleeping. He went straight for the kitchen for a beer, then to the bedroom after. </p>
<p>Jaina fell asleep in the cloaking darkness of the living room to the muffled sound of a pre-recorded football game. She still slept a little easier than she was used to, though.    </p>
<p>So did Sylvanas. With an untouched bottle of gin on her nightstand.</p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Roll To Me</h2></a>
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    <i>And I don't think I have ever seen</i><br/>
<i>A soul so in despair</i><br/>
<i>So if you want to talk the night through</i><br/>
<i>Guess who will be there?</i>
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</div>Jaina had waited for nearly an hour at the little cafe she was supposed to meet Arthas at for lunch. She’d wanted to talk to him. Perhaps not quite the conversation her mother had suggested she have, but it didn’t matter. He hadn’t shown.<p>He hadn’t even bothered to text her until just now, and she read over it a few times just to make sure she was reading it properly. </p><p>
  <i>I know I was supposed to meet you. I know I flaked. I have an excuse, but it doesn’t matter. I’m sorry. Let me bring home dinner to make it up to you, and we can talk then? An hour?</i>
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    <b>I have plans this evening.</b>
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  <i>Early dinner, then. And then you’re free.</i>
</p><p>Jaina found herself wondering, suddenly, if someone had stolen Arthas’s phone, or if this was some sort of joke. </p><p>
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    <b>Fine. Early dinner.</b>
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</p><p>Jaina tossed her phone on the coffee table in front of herself and stared down at it like it had grown horns before she sighed and retreated to the bathroom. A soak sounded wonderful, right now. </p><p>In the end, Arthas was a little late. Not terribly so. And he walked in carrying a few to-go containers from a sushi place Jaina actually liked. And...flowers. Fucking flowers. </p><p>Jaina crossed her arms over her chest as she stood in the middle of the living room looking at him. “What, uh...what’s all this, then?” </p><p>“It’s...I don’t know. An apology.” </p><p>“For what?” Jaina asked with a faint tilt of her head - though she was sure Arthas had no idea. </p><p>She was right, of course. He looked down at the flowers and then away - towards the kitchen, where he placed the food and began opening the boxes.</p><p>Jaina went for the plates silently, placing them down for him as he began distributing the food. </p><p>Dinner was a quiet affair. Arthas cleared his plate. Jaina didn’t. </p><p>It felt foreign, really. All of it did. The flowers, the dinner. The lack of background noise from the TV. </p><p>She glanced up at Arthas when he cleared his throat and stood from the dining room table to clear both their plates before returning once they were in the dishwasher. Yet another rarity. </p><p>He stood beside her chair for a moment before kneeling down next to it and taking her hand into his own as he looked up at her. “I know something is wrong, Jaina. I’m not an idiot. I…” He sighed as his words already began to fail him, and leaned his head forward against Jaina’s thigh. “I’ll do the counseling. If that’s what it takes.” </p><p>“You make it sound like such a sacrifice,” Jaina observed quietly.  </p><p>“I miss you.” Arthas breathed against her thigh, and Jaina’s brow furrowed in response to the feeling of the warmth of his breath against her skin through the leggings she was wearing. “You’ve been sleeping on the couch nearly every night for weeks. I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me.”</p><p>“I’ve tried to tell you a hundred times. I’ve tried to tell you for years.” Jaina countered as Arthas looked back up at her. </p><p>“Please let me try.” Arthas murmured, and Jaina had to stop herself from visibly tensing. </p><p>Maybe he took her silence as a good sign, because a moment later - he was kneeling up to press his lips against the corner of her mouth, and it was all she could do not to turn her head away. </p><p>His hand, too, wandered. Ever higher up her inner thigh as every inch of her skin began to crawl in protest. </p><p>“Please.” Arthas whispered as his free hand came up and turned Jaina’s head. His fingertips lingered against her jaw in an almost-hold, and Jaina exhaled sharply. </p><p>He mistook her discomfort for something it wasn’t, and his next kiss was more forceful as his hand trailed beneath her shirt towards her breasts. </p><p>Jaina was so stunned by her own reactions, she was frozen until she realized Arthas’s hand was working at the waistband of her leggings. </p><p>“Stop.” She whispered as she turned her head sharply to escape the kiss and shut her thighs as tightly as she could. “I...I need a shower. Okay?” </p><p>Arthas’s face was a mixture of hope and irritation. Whatever mask he’d put on for the evening was already cracking, and Jaina pushed her chair back to get far enough away from him to stand up. </p><p>Her heart was hammering painfully in her chest as she sat on the lid of the toilet a moment later, her arms crossed in front of her stomach tightly. It was all she could do not to panic. It would seem strange if she didn’t sleep with him after all this. A month ago, she would have. She would have given in and hated herself for it. </p><p>She was spiraling rapidly when the distant sound of a phone ringing suddenly grabbed her attention. The sound was enough to snap her back into the present and drive her towards the bathroom door, where she stopped with her hand on the knob. </p><p>“Yeah. Yeah, Dad I fucking- Sorry. I did. Yeah. Yeah, I told her. Yep. Sushi, flowers, everything. Listen, I gotta go. Yeah, she’s in the shower. Alright. Night.” </p><p>Jaina’s forehead hit the door. She was almost relieved in those moments before she walked out and into the bedroom where Arthas was waiting - smiling at her unwittingly. </p><p>“You, uh...you asked your dad how to get me into bed with you?” Jaina asked - her voice entirely too calm for the question. </p><p>Arthas turned ten shades of pale. “Jaina. I wouldn’t do that, come on.” </p><p>“Who was that on the phone, then?” Jaina asked with a gesture in the direction she’d heard the call come from. </p><p>“One of the partners.” Arthas explained without hesitation, and Jaina nodded faintly. </p><p>“You’re an asshole,” Jaina whispered with an almost sad smile curling at the corners of her lips. “I didn’t know you called one of the partners ‘dad’.” </p><p>Jaina saw the realization wash over him, and he didn’t try to stop her as she made her way out of the bedroom towards the garage, snatching her keys up along the way. </p><p>It was inevitable, really, that she would wind up parked across the street from the bar.</p>
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</div>“Did you say Jaina was coming after close?” Valeera asked as she polished a glass next to Sylvanas behind the bar. They only had a couple of tables filled tonight. It was quiet. A nice, easy transition into the rest of the week and the increasingly busy days to come.<p>“Yeah.” Sylvanas said with a soft smile as she went over the order she’d been working on her laptop. </p><p>“‘Kay. Cuz that Benz has been parked across the street for like fifteen minutes, and we don’t close for like two more hours.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s eyes flashed up to the windows, and her fingertips faltered on the keyboard. </p><p>It was around then that her phone began to vibrate in her back pocket, and Valeera gave her a gentle nudge with her hip. “Go ahead. I’m fine. Don’t be dumb.” </p><p>Sylvanas shut her laptop quickly and dipped into the stairwell behind the bar as she lifted the phone to her ear. </p><p>“Jaina? What’s up? Is that you outside?” Sylvanas was shutting the door even as she spoke, not that there was any danger in Valeera hearing this conversation. Maybe it was just instinct. </p><p>“Yeah,” Jaina said quietly as she leaned back into her seat and let out a slow, trembling breath. “Just wanted to let you know I can wait out here. Please don’t worry about me. I’m just early.” </p><p>“Well, now I’m worried,” Sylvanas responded in a low tone. </p><p>“Don’t be.” Jaina breathed as she ran her hand over her face. But her voice had already cracked. She was already lowering the phone from her ear. </p><p>“I’m coming out.” Sylvanas disconnected the call before Jaina could argue, and snatched her coat up from behind the bar before hesitating as she looked at Valeera. </p><p>“It’s two tables.” Valeera dismissed with a lift of her brow as she picked up the next glass that needed polishing. “But I’m taking your tips.” </p><p>Sylvanas didn’t feel the need to point out that Valeera always got all the tips. She was too busy slinging her coat on and making her way outside, where she broke into a jog to get to Jaina’s car as quickly as she could.</p><p>As soon as she slipped into the passenger seat and shut the door against the cold, her eyes landed on Jaina - who was doing her best not to look over, right now. </p><p>“Syl, please. I just need a minute. I should’ve found somewhere else to go and come when I was supposed to.” </p><p>“Jaina...baby…” </p><p>Jaina’s eyes fluttered shut when that word fell from Sylvanas’s lips. It sounded so right. She wiped at the tear that had slipped down her cheek quickly. Almost as quickly as Sylvanas reached out for her in an attempt to take her hand. </p><p>“Don’t,” Jaina whispered sharply, and Sylvanas pulled away like she’d been burned - her ears pinned back hard and her hands folding themselves in her own lap immediately. “I fucking...he…” </p><p>Sylvanas was nearly crying, herself, now. As it was, she was shifting anxiously in her seat and worrying at her hands. “Talk, Jaina. Please. I’m gonna have a heart attack.” </p><p>Jaina’s knee was bouncing, now, as she gripped at the steering wheel and leaned forward a bit. “I hate him.” She whispered. “I fucking hate him. And I probably smell like him. And you’re gonna know if you get too close.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s lips parted as her only response to that, at first. She was stunned, really. </p><p>“Jaina, come here,” Sylvanas whispered, her hand stopping just short of touching her. As much as she wanted to, she was terrified of upsetting her further. “Please come here. I’m not gonna do anything you don’t want me to.” </p><p>Jaina hesitated for a long while, clearly struggling with whatever conflict was currently raging in her. But eventually, she turned and sought Sylvanas out over the center console almost desperately. </p><p>Sylvanas pulled her close the moment she was sure it was okay. </p><p>“You don’t smell like him, Jaina,” Sylvanas whispered as Jaina’s body shuddered once in her arms. “You smell like you and nothing else. But I wouldn’t care if you did. Okay?” </p><p>Jaina nodded weakly. “I’m being stupid.” She mumbled against Sylvanas’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry. And I’m sorry I let him touch me.” </p><p>“You aren’t stupid, Jaina. Don’t say that. And don’t apologize to me for that. The only reason I care about that at all is because you’re upset. Did...what happened?” </p><p>“We didn’t...I wouldn’t sleep with him. He just...god, I wanted to crawl out of my skin. I still do. I can’t stand it anymore. I fucking can’t.” </p><p>Sylvanas found it difficult to quell the anger she felt roiling in the pit of her stomach. Anger, and protectiveness that she knew she had no right to be feeling. But fuck, she didn’t want him touching her, either. Not if it ended in this. And she felt so fucking helpless. </p><p>“Coming to the realization that you’ve let someone have all the best years of your life only for them to piss it all away is a lot to process.” Jaina finally said as Sylvanas stroked over her hair. </p><p>“The best years of your life aren’t an age-range,” Sylvanas murmured before pressing her lips lightly against the top of Jaina’s head. “If you haven’t had them yet, then you can have them, still.” </p><p>Something about the wording and the softness of Sylvanas’s voice took all the wind out of Jaina’s sails. Brought the maelstrom in her mind down to a much more manageable trickle of emotion. </p><p>Enough, at least, for her to pull back slowly and sink back into the driver’s seat. This time, though, she twined her fingers with Sylvanas’s and pulled the other woman’s hand into her lap. “You should probably get back to the bar. I’ll go get a coffee or something until later.” </p><p>“Valeera’s got it.” Sylvanas dismissed immediately. “We can use the alley entrance if you’d rather go upstairs with me.” </p><p>“I would rather.” Jaina looked down at their hands, then. At Sylvanas’s delicate wrist peaking from the sleeve of her jacket. She ran her thumb over it because she could. Because she wanted to. “I’m starving, though.” </p><p>“Switch spots with me. We can go through a drive-through if you’re into that.” </p><p>Jaina laughed. A tired laugh, sure, but it was something. “Honestly? I’d kill for a greasy burger, right now. I guess I haven’t really been eating all that much for...well. A while.” </p><p>“I can do that. A burger’s easy.” Sylvanas said with a smile, and Jaina looked at her in response for a moment. The way she said it had been so sweet.  </p><p>“I’m really sorry I was such a fucking mess, Syl. I really am. I usually have it a lot more together than that.” </p><p>Sylvanas lifted Jaina’s hands to her lips and kissed over her knuckles before murmuring against them quietly. “You don’t have to have it together for me. Ever. You can be a mess all the time with me.” </p><p>“That’s sweet of you, but I won’t be.” Jaina said quietly, watching the way Sylvanas touched her hand almost longingly. </p><p>“We’re switching, right?” Sylvanas asked as she turned Jaina’s hand slowly and brushed her lips against Jaina’s palm, her eyes lifting to find Jaina’s.</p><p>Jaina nodded faintly and Sylvanas finally released her hand so she could get out of the car. Sylvanas opted for climbing over the center console to avoid the cold, and she offered Jaina her hand as soon as she got her seatbelt buckled and seemed comfortable. </p><p>Jaina held it gladly and smiled as she looked over to watch Sylvanas while she drove. “You look good in this car.” She complimented after a while, because she did. </p><p>She looked like something out of a magazine between the brown leather jacket she was wearing and the casual, one-handed hold she had on the wheel. </p><p>“Oh?” Sylvanas asked with a faint smile and a quick sideways glance in Jaina’s direction. She gave Jaina’s hand a little squeeze for good measure, too. </p><p>“Yeah,” Jaina said with a soft laugh. “You’re such a little shit sometimes, I hope you know.” </p><p>“I know. Trust me.” Sylvanas managed through her own responding chuckle as she flipped the signal on and turned in to the drive-through at McDonald’s. “So. A burger?” </p><p>Jaina made a thoughtful sound in the back of her throat as she leaned over the console to peer at the menu. “It’s been a while. I feel like I want everything on the menu, honestly.”</p><p>“We can get everything on the menu.” Sylvanas offered with a lift of her brow as the poor order-taker listened on through the speaker. </p><p>“I think I’ll stick with a number three, actually. Coke. And some nuggets.” </p><p>Sylvanas ordered two of the same, and Jaina stowed their bag away in the floorboard for the ride back to the bar. </p><p>After Sylvanas stopped shivering once they made it up the metal-grated stairs in the back alley to the loft, they wound up on her couch eating way too much food - and enjoying all of it way too much. Eventually, they had to admit defeat with a few leftover fries and nuggets and Jaina tucked cozily against Sylvanas’s side. </p><p>The TV wasn’t on. All Jaina could hear was Sylvanas’s quiet breathing and the barely-audible sound of her hand stroking along her back. </p><p>It was blissful. </p><p>“You don’t know how nice this is, do you?” Jaina asked as she gave Sylvanas’s thigh a gentle squeeze through her jeans before resting her hand against her side beneath one of her ever-present flannels. </p><p>“It’s extremely nice,” Sylvanas responded as she tilted her head from where it had been laying so she could look down at Jaina. “Is...is it particularly nice for you, though?” </p><p>“I’m used to noise,” Jaina explained. “Even when I’m working or reading in my office there’s almost always a football game or something on.” </p><p>“Oh…” Sylvanas frowned and Jaina shrugged dismissively. “I kind of hate football, if I’m being honest.” </p><p>“That’s really sexy of you, actually.” Jaina murmured with a chuckle. “Everything about you is sexy, though, so that’s to be expected.” </p><p>“You just watched me demolish a double quarter pounder meal and like a million chicken nuggets. That couldn’t possibly have been sexy.” </p><p>“Oh, you were positively feral. Eating politely, chewing with your mouth closed...offering me <i>napkins</i>. Fuck me up, babe.” Jaina’s voice was full of amusement, but it didn’t bother Sylvanas.</p><p>In fact, Sylvanas was grinning as she moved, suddenly, to sling a leg over Jaina’s lap to straddle her and look down at her. “Did you see the time I ate like four fries at once?” </p><p>“I did,” Jaina said as her hands slid slowly up Sylvanas’s legs towards her ass. “Hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” </p><p>Sylvanas was laughing again as Jaina’s hands trailed higher - up beneath her undershirt until she was teasing at the skin there with her nails, which had Sylvanas faltering a bit. </p><p>Jaina saw the flicker in Sylvanas’s expression. The moment shifted into something else for her then, too. It dawned on her that there was a beautiful woman in her lap. It dawned on her that she very much enjoyed the feeling. </p><p>“Can I tell you something?” Jaina asked as her hands gradually made their way around until they were resting against Sylvanas’s ribcage just beneath the underside of her bra. </p><p>“Yeah.” Sylvanas breathed with a flicker of a smile, curiosity alight in her eyes. </p><p>“I don’t think anything could’ve prepared me for how it would feel to...ah. I don’t know. The way you are right now, and last time.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s hands came up to frame Jaina’s face as she spoke, and gradually her fingertips trailed her jaw in a series of feather-light touches. “You like topping.” Sylvanas offered the sentiment she felt Jaina was hoping to convey, and Jaina sighed in relief as she nodded. </p><p>“Yeah. Fuck, I do. I really do.” Jaina breathed, watching and very much appreciating as Sylvanas slipped her flannel off and tossed it aside on the sofa. </p><p>Sylvanas met Jaina’s gaze when she settled down in her lap, and held it even as she slowly pulled her tank top up so that it was tucked beneath her arms. She’d managed to catch her bra with her hands on her way up, as well - which left her exquisitely exposed as she tilted her head and took one of Jaina’s hands in her own to guide it towards her chest. She left it resting against her breastbone, and enjoyed, for a moment, the way Jaina’s eyes took her in. </p><p>She enjoyed Jaina’s hand sliding towards her breast even more. Especially when the warmth of her palm passed across it and she felt a slight tug against her nipple. That was what drew a soft breath from her smile-curved lips as she finally leaned down close to Jaina’s ear. </p><p>“You like to be in charge?” Sylvanas asked in a whisper as Jaina’s other hand found her currently unattended breast. </p><p>“I suppose I do.” Jaina breathed in reply, reaching to unhook Sylvanas’s bra so it wouldn’t be quite so restricting, despite it being largely out of the way. </p><p>“I’m into it.” Sylvanas’s reply came along with a shudder as Jaina’s nails trailed down the flat expanse of her stomach. “Hang on…” </p><p>Jaina felt utterly bereft when Sylvanas slid off her lap with ease and made her way across the loft, but she was too curious to stay put. </p><p>By the time she stood and turned around, however, Sylvanas was already on her way back holding what Jaina knew to be a harness, though she’d never encountered one in person. College trysts hadn’t usually gotten far enough for all that. </p><p>“You were supposed to hang on.” Sylvanas complained with a barely-convincing pout while Jaina examined what she was holding with a divot between her brows. </p><p>“What, uh…” Jaina trailed off as Sylvanas approached the couch, and Sylvanas shrugged as if it weren’t at all a big deal. </p><p>“It’s for you to wear,” Sylvanas explained, dropping it onto the couch and reaching to draw Jaina close to her. “You don’t have to, obviously. I’m just interested to know if you’d enjoy it.” </p><p>For whatever reason, Jaina had automatically assumed she would be on the receiving end. Well. The reasons were pretty obvious to her, but...she wouldn’t have minded. </p><p>The thought of actually using it, however, was a little daunting. At least until Sylvanas pressed her body along her own lithely and gave her a gentle bite just beneath her ear. “Let me ride you.” </p><p>“Oh.” Jaina breathed, hooking her fingers into Sylvanas’s belt and then sliding them towards the buckle so she could undo it. “Well, fuck. If you want to.” </p><p>Sylvanas let out a breathy almost-laugh and brushed her lips against the side of Jaina’s mouth. “I want you to know what it feels like.” </p><p>Jaina really, <i>really</i> wanted that too. Suddenly. Sylvanas had a way of purring things out that made Jaina realize a lot of things, actually. </p><p>Sylvanas helped her out of her clothes - leaving little kisses here and there - and, eventually, and with a few light-hearted moments of shameless laughter while Sylvanas re-sized the harness for her - Jaina was sitting on the edge of the couch. Feeling only marginally ridiculous. </p><p>Maybe Sylvanas could tell. Maybe she couldn’t. </p><p>But the moment she lowered herself to her knees between Jaina’s legs was rather life-affirming. </p><p>“This looks good on you.” Sylvanas murmured as she stroked along Jaina’s inner thighs and looked up at her. </p><p>“Does it?” Jaina asked, glancing down at it doubtfully. </p><p>Sylvanas chuckled and bent her head to kiss her way up one of Jaina’s thighs. “I think they always look a healthy mixture of hilarious and sexy on people, honestly.” Sylvanas murmured at the apex of Jaina’s thigh. </p><p>Jaina swallowed thickly when Sylvanas slowly wrapped her fingers around the base of the toy and turned her face towards it. Even the one time she dragged her lips up along the underside of the length was enough for Jaina to understand the appeal. </p><p>“If you don’t come here, Sylvanas…” Jaina huffed those words and shifted on the couch, growing genuinely concerned she was going to make a mess of it before long. </p><p>Sylvanas relented with a sigh and moved up so that her knees were on either side of Jaina once she worked her jeans off as quickly as she could manage. “Better?” </p><p>“Yeah. Much better.” Jaina responded with a sigh as she leaned back against the couch and shook her head with a quiet laugh. “I’m...fucking nervous. Can you imagine? I’m nearly forty…” </p><p>“That’s kind of hot, honestly,” Sylvanas said with a shrug, glancing around with a faint narrowing of her eyes. “Fuck.” </p><p>“...What?” Jaina asked, the confusion evident on her face as she had to reach out and grab onto one of Sylvanas’s hips to keep her on the couch when she leaned backward at what seemed to be an impossible level and opened a little drawer on the coffee table. </p><p>Jaina stared questioningly at the bottle in Sylvanas’s hand. “You...you just have lube in your coffee table?” She asked incredulously as Sylvanas poured a little in her hand in order to slick the toy. </p><p>“Coffee table, bedside table, medicine cabinet,” Sylvanas explained with a shrug. “Running out of lube sucks. You would have suffered immensely just now if I had to run all the way across the room for lube.” </p><p>“You almost flung yourself off and broke your neck. How would I have explained that?” Jaina asked while Sylvanas looked at her pitifully. </p><p>“You’d have walked downstairs and interrupted Valeera closing in a way she would find highly amusing.” Sylvanas explained, and Jaina had to admit that sounded pretty accurate. </p><p>“Alright, alright. This is serious.” Sylvanas said as she reached for Jaina and cradled the sides of her face to get her attention. “Okay?” </p><p>Jaina managed maybe a second or two before she was laughing, and Sylvanas was, too. Until, eventually, Jaina had had enough and pulled Sylvanas down into a kiss. More to thank her than anything. For just...existing. </p><p>And sometime during the kiss, without Jaina realizing it, Sylvanas had lifted her hips and lowered herself onto the toy. </p><p>Jaina only noticed when Sylvanas’s breathing got a little heavy, and inevitably caught in her throat when she was fully settled against Jaina’s lap. </p><p>At first, Jaina didn’t know what to do as the kiss broke off and Sylvanas leaned into her. </p><p>And then, it was as natural as anything. She wrapped her arms around Sylvanas’s back and held her until she seemed more comfortable, and peppered the shoulder that she could reach with soft, encouraging kisses. </p><p>“Alright, don’t make me laugh anymore.” Sylvanas murmured as she adjusted her hips with a quiet groan. “I don’t need to explain any of this to the emergency room.” </p><p>“I’ll try,” Jaina whispered as she lowered her hands to Sylvanas’s hips to hold them carefully. “I’m probably not that great at this.” </p><p>“Just relax.” Sylvanas murmured as she leaned back and got her bearings - holding Jaina’s shoulder with one hand. “Enjoy it.” </p><p>Jaina had little choice but to do just that when Sylvanas started moving. It was every kind of sensory overload. The way Sylvanas’s thighs flexed while she lifted and dropped her hips. The way her head eventually fell back as her breathing got a little ragged. </p><p>And especially when she reached between her own legs to touch herself. </p><p>It was that sight that finally drove Jaina from her lust-induced stupor and had her wrapping her arms around Sylvanas’s back until she was gripping at her shoulders and pulling her forward. </p><p>She finally noticed Sylvanas’s thighs were trembling, too, now that she was closer - and she tightened her hold as one of her hands found the back of the other woman’s neck while she rocked her hips in short, rather desperate motions against Jaina.</p><p>“Lay down for me,” Jaina whispered breathlessly against Sylvanas’s shoulder. “Let me try.”</p><p>Sylvanas, as badly as she wanted to come right then, was much more interested, suddenly, in doing just that.</p><p>Jaina helped her with a surprising amount of ease without even jarring them apart, and Sylvanas looked up at her as her thighs came for rest atop Jaina’s when Jaina drew her knees up to make both of them more comfortable.</p><p>This felt entirely different than what they'd previously been doing. There was just something about the flush of Sylvanas's skin and the unhinged breaths she was taking as Jaina began to move that were unlike anything Jaina had ever experienced.</p><p>“Closer,” Sylvanas managed to murmur as she allowed herself to rest her head against the arm of the couch. “I want to feel you.”</p><p>Jaina nodded - eager to do whatever Sylvanas wanted her to. God, when she whimpered as Jaina rested some of her weight down against her, Jaina mused that she probably would've walked right off the fire escape for her right then. </p><p>“Like this?” Jaina asked, still holding herself up on one of her forearms until Sylvanas pulled her closer still until there was no space left between them.</p><p>Only then did Sylvanas whisper in her ear in response. “Like this.” </p><p>And then, Jaina felt Sylvanas’s thighs slide along her sides before they settled again. </p><p>Jaina had never felt more strangely, fiercely protective of anything in her life as she did now when she found the depth and strength of thrusts Sylvanas needed - ones that had Sylvanas’s nails digging into her back and her head thrown back in abandon. </p><p>“Don't stop,” Sylvanas gasped a short while later. “Fuck. Fuck, Jaina. You feel so good. You f…” That last word trailed off into a harsh, shuddering series of gasps against Jaina’s ear. Jaina, in turn, found a sensitive spot along Sylvanas’s shoulder to latch onto with her teeth. The sharp, blissful ache of the bite drive Sylvanas harder and deeper into her orgasm than she'd prepared herself for. </p><p>Sylvanas urged Jaina on with hands on her sides as she rode out her orgasm, but she needn't have worried. Jaina had no intention of stopping. At least not until Sylvanas slid a hand between them to press against her stomach in order to bring her movements to a stop.</p><p>Words were beyond her right then. They were beyond Jaina, too. For a while, anyway. Until Sylvanas caught her breath and helped Jaina pull free of her so they could lay against each other properly. </p><p>“You bit me.”  Sylvanas breathed with a half-gone smile. </p><p>“I...yeah.” Jaina agreed as her eyes flashed down to the darkening bruise above Sylvanas's prominent collarbone. “It would seem so.”</p><p>“You left a mark.” Sylvanas saw it in Jaina’s eyes, and she managed a fuller smile then. “I like that.” </p><p>“Oh, thank God. I thought you were going to look in the mirror in the morning and be furious with me.”</p><p>“I'm going to look in the mirror in the morning and remember how well you fucked me. What more could a girl ask for?”</p><p>Jaina hummed and blushed and hid her face against the side of Sylvanas’s neck. What an odd thing to blush over, Jaina thought to herself as Sylvanas ran her fingertips lazily along the line of her spine.</p><p>“It's my turn, Jaina…” Sylvanas said after a while. </p><p>“Mm, what? To top?” Jaina asked with a faint smirk.</p><p>“Yeah.” Sylvanas breathed with a chuckle. “To top.”</p><p>“I really like it when you go down on me.” Jaina said without hesitation, leaning slightly to one side so she could run a fingertip in a slow, teasing circle around Sylvanas’s breast - avoiding her nipple until Sylvanas grabbed her hand and brought it to her lips to kiss.</p><p>“What a coincidence,” Sylvanas mused with an impish grin that Jaina was starting to get very attached to. “I very much enjoy going down on you.”</p><p>They wound up in Sylvanas's bed a while later. Jaina wasn't really sure when or how. What she was sure of, was that she was utterly exhausted, she'd lost count of how many times she'd come, and she very much enjoyed listening to Sylvanas's steady heartbeat with her head against her chest and her arms around her. They’d established Jaina couldn’t stay the night. It was just that neither of them was quite ready for her to go, yet. And that was just fine. </p><p>They were both in a bit of a daze, still. Jaina would kiss Sylvanas’s chest now and then, and Sylvanas would murmur her unintelligible appreciation in response. </p><p>“I never thought I would have this.” Jaina said - so out of nowhere, and so unexpectedly, that Sylvanas had to look down at her for a moment before the words registered. </p><p>“You deserve to have this, Jaina.” Sylvanas whispered, the sincerity dripping from every word. And perhaps no small amount of longing. </p><p>“I have to tell you something.” Jaina sat up slowly as she said that, and Sylvanas’s ears pressed back in a display of worry that was obvious even to Jaina as she sat up next to her. Jaina reached for her hand quickly in what she hoped was a reassuring gesture before she continued.</p><p>“The sex is...well. The best I've ever had. More than I ever thought sex could be.”</p><p>Sylvanas realized rather quickly that Jaina’s hand was trembling, and she moved to sit a little closer and held her hand a little tighter. “It's...yeah. Yeah, it's good.” Sylvanas even sounded nervous.</p><p>“Well, I wouldn't be into it if it were just sex,” Jaina said quickly before she could lose her nerve, and before Sylvanas got any more anxious. “That's something I can't avoid. The fact that I blew past ‘just sex’ the first time we slept together. And I'm sorry if that's not something you wanted to hear from me. I just want to be transparent with you.”</p><p>Jaina frowned when Sylvanas exhaled as though she'd been holding her breath for far too long. She already had another apology ready on her lips when Sylvanas spoke. </p><p>“Then for the sake of transparency, it usually <i>is</i> about sex for me. Until...I don’t know. Fairly recently, I guess. I kind of stopped all that because it just...wasn’t enough, anymore. And then I met you. And it still isn’t just about sex.” Sylvanas bit her lower lip and exhaled through her nose as she let her head fall back against the pillow, again. “Fuck.” </p><p>“Yeah.” Jaina agreed. “Fuck, indeed.” </p><p>“Sorry I didn’t find you...uh. However long ago.” </p><p>Jiana smiled a little sadly as she ran her thumb over Sylvanas’s bare hip idly. “Like fifteen years ago? We were both too busy believing we were going to change the world then, I think.” </p><p>“Maybe.” Sylvanas breathed and toyed with a fly-away as she looked at Jaina’s slightly messy hair. “Maybe the term ‘world’ is relative, though. Maybe it’s whatever you make of it, and maybe that means it’s not too late to change it, at all.” </p><p>“I could believe that if you could believe it, too.” Jaina said as she finally lifted herself from Sylvanas’s chest to prop herself onto her elbows and look down at her. </p><p>“Then I’ll try my best to believe it.” Sylvanas countered easily, reaching out a hand to brush the backs of her knuckles against Jaina’s cheek. </p><p>“I guess you got me there.” Jaina murmured, her eyes fluttering shut as she turned her head towards Sylvanas’s hand and exhaled against it. </p><p>“It’s late.” Sylvanas reminded her gently, and Jaina nodded. </p><p>“Twenty more minutes.” Jaina whispered, and Sylvanas smiled. </p><p>“Deal.”</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Come Around</h2></a>
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    <i>I know we're not alright</i><br/>
<i>It's always darkest just before the light</i><br/>
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</div>“Hello?”<p>Jaina’s eyes snapped up to Arthas, and the moment she’d bought herself by pretending not to pay attention to him was spent. </p><p>And he was still standing there holding Sylvanas’s shirt glaring daggers at her from the door of her office. </p><p>She’d heard his question.</p><p>He didn’t need to know that. </p><p>Jaina looked at the shirt with a mildly agitated raise of her brow and a shrug. “‘Hello’ what, Arthas? I have a trial in the morning.” </p><p>Arthas took another step into the office, and Jaina was glad the sweater she was wearing hid the fact that the hairs had begun to rise along her arms. </p><p>“I asked you where the fuck this shirt came from. I tripped over one of your bags in the closet and it fell out smelling like cologne. And not any of mine.” </p><p>Jaina knew he was lying. That bag had been in one of the storage racks that held her purses and shoes. He’d looked through her things. She felt as though accusing him in return wasn’t currently the best way to go. </p><p>She looked at the shirt again, more carefully this time. “Ah, one of the girls at the shelter.” She commented dismissively. “Found it in my floorboard after I gave her a ride home after court a while back. Must have forgotten to return it.”</p><p>“Okay, and why the fuck did she forget an undershirt in your car? How is that even possible?” Arthas demanded sharply - as visibly on edge as Jaina currently felt. </p><p>She sighed heavily and tossed her pen onto her desk as she leaned back in her chair and returned his stare without hesitating. “They’re homeless, Arthas. They don’t tend to have many dressers to keep their clothes in.” </p><p>His eyes flashed down to the shirt, then back up to Jaina as his jaw clenched and unclenched. “Well, I’m throwing it out. You can buy her a new one. It stinks. You should get her boyfriend some decent cologne while you’re balls deep in charity cases.” </p><p>Jaina had to force herself to stay in her chair as she watched him leave the office. As she listened to the lid of the trash can lift in the kitchen. </p><p>She swallowed thickly when it shut, and finally got up to shut her office door. She locked it this time. She needed a moment to get the trembling in her hands under control without fear of Arthas coming back in in the middle of her panicking over the loss of...of what, exactly? A shirt? </p><p>But it’d been Sylvanas’s shirt. Carefully tucked away and never touched again. Just there. Just so Jaina could know it was there.</p><p>There were tears slipping down her cheeks before she even realized it, and she caught them quickly with her fingertips as she inhaled sharply and made her way over to her office window to look out over the softly illuminated pool in their back yard. She hated that pool. </p><p>She hated that yard. </p><p>She hated all of this. </p><p>Thank god she had a meeting at the shelter in half an hour.</p>
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</div>“Hi, I’m Jaina.” Jaina’s smile was warm as she held out her hand to the woman in front of her, who took it eagerly in her own before they sat down across from one another.<p>They were in Maiev’s office. Jaina had been shocked the first time Maiev offered it to her. Now, it was a regular occurrence. Any time Jaina met with one of the women here, Maiev suddenly had something to do - and the office was free for Jaina to use. </p><p>“I’m Elly.” The young woman said with a much broader smile than the one Jaina had offered her. She seemed so excited, and Jaina couldn’t help but appreciate that fact after the night she’d had. </p><p>They were reviewing and chatting long enough that Maiev eventually had no choice but to poke her head in and remind Jaina that it was at least half-past lights out. </p><p>Jaina apologized, and Maiev just shrugged off her attempts at niceties as she walked her towards the door. </p><p>Jaina didn’t necessarily remember driving the short distance to the bar. She certainly hadn’t called Sylvanas first. </p><p>It just so happened that Sylvanas was unpacking a shipment that they were going to need tomorrow, because Sylvanas always had their stuff delivered on Mondays to make their workdays a little less hectic. </p><p>She’d heard the chirp of Jaina’s car being locked just outside, and she was already unlocking the front door when Jaina arrived in it. She didn’t even need to stop there. Sylvanas was already holding the door open for her to walk through. </p><p>“Jaina?” Sylvanas’s voice was soft and questioning as Jaina moved behind her to wait for her to lock everything back up. </p><p>“Yeah.” Jaina’s voice was a whisper in response, and when Sylvanas turned to look at her, her brow was furrowed in concern. </p><p>Jaina swallowed thickly and tried to offer her best attempt at a smile. </p><p>“Baby…” Sylvanas breathed the word just as Jaina reached for her, and she took a couple of quick steps to get close enough to pull Jaina into her arms. She stayed quiet as Jaina inhaled sharply against the crook of her neck. </p><p>She kept staying quiet as Jaina’s hands fell - too quickly - to the buckle of her belt and began working at it with far less grace than Sylvanas was used to. But not when Jaina cursed under her breath when she couldn’t get her hands to cooperate well enough to get the tight jeans down past the other woman’s hips. </p><p>“Hey…” Sylvanas whispered as she reached to cradle Jaina’s face. “Hey, hey…”</p><p>“I don’t want to talk about it.” Jaina breathed, her words trembling on their way past her lips. </p><p>“What do you want?” Sylvanas asked as Jaina’s fingertips trembled on their journey beneath her shirt. “Me?” </p><p>“Yes.” Jaina gasped as she buried her face back into the crook of Sylvanas’s neck. Another sharp breath in, then, as Sylvanas took Jaina’s hands from under her own shirt and began backing her towards the bartop in what little lighting was currently on. Barely enough to see by. But enough.</p><p>Sylvanas let out a breath into Jaina’s hair as she guided her hands behind her back to keep her still and pressed her backward against the bartop all in one fluid motion. </p><p>“Do you want me to fuck you?” She asked in a breathy tone against Jaina’s ear. </p><p>“I’ll fucking beg you to if that’s what it takes.” Jaina hissed as her wrists flexed in Sylvanas’s grip. </p><p>She needn’t have offered, apparently, because Sylvanas was already turning her around so that she had little choice but to lean over the bar. </p><p>Jaina hadn’t really thought about why she’d come here. She just had. Like her car knew her better than she knew herself. </p><p>She hadn’t really thought that she was desperate for the thrill of this. The feeling of Sylvanas tugging her skirt up to her waist and pressing her down against the bar as she nudged her thighs apart with her knee. </p><p>But suddenly, she was. </p><p>Suddenly, she was gripping the edge of the bar and groaning low and hard against it as Sylvanas slid a hand down the curve of her ass and pulled her panties to one side in order to pres the full lengths of two of her fingers into her. </p><p>“More.” Jaina gasped even as her back arched in response to the sudden fullness that somehow still wasn’t enough. </p><p>Sylvanas pressed a third finger beside the first two without question, and Jaina’s entire body shuddered. “Yes.” She hissed, her eyes shut tightly and her knuckles white from the grip she had on the bartop. </p><p>Sylvanas gathered that Jaina wasn’t in the mood for slow and gentle.</p><p>She was right. </p><p>Jaina was gritting her teeth hard as she rocked her hips back against Sylvanas’s hand impatiently until her movements were finally too fast and too hard for her to seek more. Then, it was all Jaina could do to drop a hand between her own legs to rub rather frantically at her clit. </p><p>Sylvanas remained steadfast all the while - one arm wrapped around Jaina’s middle while the other burned in protest at the awkward position and the sheer effort she was expending. </p><p>Jaina came quickly, though. They were both panting for breath for entirely different reasons as Jaina slumped against the bar and Sylvanas did her best to fix Jaina’s panties and right her skirt. </p><p>Sylvanas wasn’t used to feeling awkward during sex. She also wasn’t used to feeling awkward <i>after</i> it. But there she was, looking down at Jaina’s back for a moment before she began fixing her own pants. </p><p>Jaina’s eyes blinked open at the sound of the buckle of Sylvanas’s belt, and she forced herself up on unsteady legs to turn and look at her. She was struck, suddenly, with immeasurable guilt at the forlorn expression on Sylvanas’s face. At the way her ears were pinned back hard and her eyes were looking anywhere but into Jaina’s. </p><p>“Don’t…” Jaina murmured quietly as she let out a breathy sigh and moved to sit down on the barstool next to herself gingerly. </p><p>Sylvanas cleared her throat and paused as she looked up at Jaina. “It’s fine.” She lied with a weak smile that Jaina had no doubt she thought was convincing. “Do you want a drink? I can-”</p><p>“I just want you.” Jaina cut her off quietly. “That’s all I want. That’s all I ever want, anymore.” </p><p>“Oh…” Sylvanas’s ears shifted. One of them even twitched as she looked around the bar for a moment in thought. “Okay, we can go upstairs. I can take you upstairs. Whatever you want.” </p><p>“No, no, no...Sylvanas, I…” Jaina sighed in frustration and reached out suddenly to tug Sylvanas close with a firm grip on the front of her shirt. </p><p>Sylvanas didn’t hesitate to lean into Jaina’s arms once they were around her, because even as off-center as she was feeling right then, she still wanted to be near her. She still craved it as much as she ever had. </p><p>“I want <i>this</i>,” Jaina finally continued as she pressed her face against Sylvanas’s shoulder. “I want the way you smell. I want the way you look at me. The way you <i>see</i> me. I want it all the time. I want it more than I want air to breathe.” </p><p>Sylvanas almost crumpled in Jaina’s arms. Almost. But she was holding onto the other woman just a little too tightly to lose her footing, entirely. </p><p>“I’m sorry.” Sylvanas murmured against Jaina’s hair. “I’m not trying to make anything harder for you. I just...I don’t know.”</p><p>“You aren’t making anything harder for me.” Jaina murmured, finally dipping her head down in a bid for a kiss that Sylvanas met her for. It was a quick kiss, but it was no less soft and intoxicating than all the others they’d shared. “Things were just...tense at home, today before my appointment at the shelter. I guess I just wanted-” Jaina sighed heavily and looked towards the tinted windows of the bar as her brow knitted and her grip on Sylvanas’s shirt loosened. “I wanted to feel like I belonged to you.” </p><p>“I can make you feel that way whenever you need me to,” Sylvanas reassured in a low, gentle tone. “Just, you know. Use your words next time, maybe. So I don’t feel like such a caveman.” </p><p>Jaina sighed and nodded as her forehead fell forward against Sylvanas’s chest.  “I have a little time. An hour or so. Let me make it up to you. Upstairs in bed like the civilized woman that I am.” </p><p>Sylvanas chuckled quietly in response. “You don’t have to make anything up to me,” She said as she helped Jaina down off the barstool. “But I’ll take all the time I can get.”</p>
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</div>Tess sighed as she looked over the center console at Valeera and gave her thigh a gentle squeeze once she put her car in park in front of the bar. “This is your stop, love.”<p>Valeera hummed in the back of her throat as she covered Tess’s hand with her own and gave it an absent-minded squeeze. </p><p>“Or...I could just take you home.” </p><p>Valeera looked over at her quickly, then, and the smile Tess offered her was both understanding and apologetic.</p><p>“I know,” Tess said without Valeera having to come up with any excuses. “I just wanted you here with me for a moment longer, and it seemed as though you’d gone somewhere else.”  </p><p>Valeera held Tess’s hand a little tighter, then, and nodded faintly. “I’m sorry, y’know?” She said after a pause. “I’m sorry I have all these hang-ups. I know you’re probably used to nice, normal girls or whatever.” </p><p>Tess shrugged and a dismissive expression crossed her face. “That would be rather boring, now, wouldn’t it?” </p><p>Valeera noted the playful smile on Tess’s face, and it drew a softer one out of her in response. “Probably, but how long are you gonna put up with it? It’s been what, two months, now?” </p><p>“Three.” Tess responded, though she didn’t sound bothered by Valeera’s lack of accuracy. </p><p>“Right,” Valeera trailed off and leaned her head back against the seat she was still buckled into. “Well, I suppose we’re sort of past the point of ‘casual’, then.” </p><p>“When did we pass that?” Tess asked. “When you started spending every weekend with me two months ago, or when you stopped ignoring my ‘good morning’ texts?” </p><p>“I’m feeling very attacked right now, actually.”  Valeera muttered, only half teasing. </p><p>Tess pulled her hand over and kissed it softly. “You know that wasn’t my intention, right?” </p><p>“I know,” Valeera whispered, biting her lower lip and shaking her head. “Um...listen, I kind of don’t know how to deal with the fact that I miss you when you aren’t around, and that my heart does weird shit when I wake up to your texts. I’m kind of not used to all this. Sometimes I feel like I’m just waiting for the other foot to fall.” </p><p>“What do you mean, Valeera?” Tess sounded as confused as she looked when Valeera glanced in her direction. </p><p>“I guess you can only get left so many times before you just think everyone is gonna leave.” Valeera finally said, and regretted it immediately. Faster, even, than Tess could lift her hand to touch along her cheek softly. </p><p>“I’m not interested in leaving, Valeera,” Tess said with every ounce of sincerity she could muster. “There’s no other foot getting ready to fall. I’ve no idea what you’ve been through to get here, but I have no intention of putting you through anything more.” </p><p>Valeera nodded. She’d understood the words Tess had said. Whether or not they’d really sunk in was up for debate, but she turned her face in Tess’s hand to brush her lips against her palm nonetheless. </p><p>“Are you free next weekend?” Valeera finally asked after a long span of silence that was filled with her delivering soft, distracting kisses over Tess’s hand and wrist. </p><p>“I’ve made it a point to be free every weekend,” Tess responded with a quiet little laugh. “Next weekend will be no different, I’m sure.” </p><p>“I was thinking maybe we could talk.” Valeera continued with a slow, quiet sigh as she finally let go of Tess’s hand and began unbuckling her seatbelt. </p><p>“Give me a kiss before you go.” Tess requested gently, not reaching out - letting Valeera come to her, instead. Once Valeera’s lips had found her own, however, she caught the back of her neck to keep her close. </p><p>“I would like that very much.” She murmured against the corner of Valeera’s mouth before pressing their foreheads together. “To talk.” </p><p>Not that there was anything wrong with what they usually did with their time every weekend. The sex was phenomenal, after all. But Tess couldn’t help but want more. That nagging feeling was only compounded when Valeera pulled away, but lingered - looking into her eyes for something Tess desperately hoped she found before they said their goodbyes and Valeera slipped out of the car towards the front door of the bar.</p>
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</div>Sylvanas stared down at the shower floor as the soap suds she’d rinsed from her body spiraled down the drain. She’d put this shower off for as long as she could stand feeling uncomfortably sweaty and sticky.<p>She didn’t enjoy washing Jaina off of her. She hated it, actually. </p><p>Like she hated washing her sheets, now, after they’d made a mess of them. Often times, she left the pillowcases on, now. Because that’s where Jaina lingered when she was gone. Because that, at least, could belong to her. </p><p>She’d finally managed to pull a pair of sweats and a clean undershirt on by the time she heard something downstairs. She’d nearly forgotten Valeera said she’d be stopping by tonight. Didn’t give her much time to fix the bed or clean anything up, so she didn’t bother. </p><p>Valeera would probably know, anyway, that Jaina had been here. </p><p>“Knock knock, hope you’re not fucking anyone in here if I’m not allowed to join in.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s lips curved into a faintly amused smile when Valeera stepped through the door and paused for a moment to look around. </p><p>“Ah, so you’ve already had fun without me. Noted.” Valeera feigned disappointment as she shut the door, and Sylvanas sighed at her as she headed towards the fridge to fetch them a couple of beers. </p><p>“You don’t even like blondes.” Sylvanas muttered as she popped the caps off and dragged her feet the entire way to the couch Valeera had already taken up residence on. </p><p>“It’s still polite to offer, Sylvanaas,” Valeera responded easily as she fished the remote out of the couch cushions.  “Don’t be rude.” </p><p>“Terribly sorry, Valeera,” Sylvanas lied as she plopped down on the couch next to her and handed her a beer. </p><p>“No biggie. How was your night?” Valeera sounded like she was tipping more towards a genuine conversation in favor of teasing, now, and Sylvanas almost found herself wishing that wasn’t the case. </p><p>“Fine.” Sylvanas responded simply as she leaned into the couch and watched as the channels flipped by on the TV. The flipping stopped abruptly when the shortness of her answer washed over Valeera. </p><p>“Fine?” She asked without looking over. “‘Fine’ always sounds very un-fine, FYI.” </p><p>Sylvanas sighed and shrugged rather helplessly, and Valeera slowly turned on the couch so she was facing her, folding her legs beneath herself as she tossed the remote aside. </p><p>“I don’t know,” Sylvanas began as she reached out, clearly seeking a hand that Valeera offered to her readily. “Can I tell you something awful?” </p><p>“You can tell me anything, Syl. Even if it’s awful.” </p><p>“I’m in love with her.” Sylvanas smiled sadly and swallowed past the sudden lump that had formed in her throat. </p><p>“Oh,” Valeera whispered, her ears sinking back and her hand tightening around Sylvanas’s. “Does she know?” </p><p>“No,” Sylvanas answered hastily. “No, no God. No. She doesn’t need this shit, right now.” </p><p>“Neither do you…” Valeera observed quietly as she brought her free hand up and stroked along Sylvanas’s forearm idly for a moment. “But I get it. I’m fucked up over Tess, too. But I’ve always had that problem, right? There’s nothing stopping you from telling Jaina whatever you want to tell her. You’ve always been brave like that.” </p><p>“There’s a ring.” Sylvanas chuckled when she said it, but it sounded almost like it hurt. </p><p>“Right,” Valeera breathed with a heavy sigh. “Right, but I think you deserve to know if that’s always going to be the case.” </p><p>“I don’t have the right to ask that question.” Sylvanas responded without hesitation because she believed it. </p><p>“You do, though, Syl,” Valeera responded, finally catching Sylvanas’s eyes with her own. “You have every right.”</p><p>“Mm. Anyway, what’s going on with you and Tess?” Sylvanas asked, and Valeera frowned at her for a moment before relenting. </p><p>“Same shit, different marital status.” Valeera responded nonchalantly. </p><p>“We’re a mess.” Sylvanas observed quietly as she looked down at Valeera’s hand in her own and reached to brush her thumb across her knuckles. </p><p>“Little bit.” Valeera agreed, because there wasn’t much point in denying it. </p><p>“Are you gonna stay the night?” Sylvanas asked without looking up. </p><p>“Do you need me to?” Valeera asked, reaching up to tuck some of Sylvanas’s damp hair behind one of her ears. </p><p>“I think so.” Sylvanas’s voice was soft in a way that made Valeera shift a little closer to her. </p><p>“Then I’m not going anywhere.” </p><p>Sylvanas nodded because that’s all she could really manage right then, and eventually she shifted against Valeera until they were both laying along the sofa - Sylvanas’s head on Valeera’s stomach and Valeera’s hand rubbing idly at her back over her shirt. </p><p>“I can’t hear the TV.” Sylvanas said after what felt like an eternity. </p><p>“You don’t care if you can hear the TV.” Valeera pointed out gently. “You don’t even watch it. You only have cable for me.” </p><p>“Can you turn it up, anyway?” Sylvanas asked, not bothering to argue with any of that. It was all true. </p><p>“...Yeah.” </p><p>Valeera kept rubbing Sylvanas’s back as she turned her attention to the TV, or at least tried to. </p><p>“You should tell her, you know.” Sylvanas murmured as she tucked her arms between them. “Let me live vicariously through you.” </p><p>“Maybe.” Valeera murmured absently. “I dunno yet.” </p><p>Sylvanas nodded her understanding. She might normally have had some wise spiel to lay out in response to that, but she was just so spent tonight. </p><p>“Thank you for staying.” </p><p>“No problem,” Valeera said as she glanced down at Sylvanas to find her eyelids drooping heavily. “Am I comfortable?” </p><p>Sylvanas’s lips curled ever so slightly. An almost-smile. But it was close. </p><p>“Yeah.”</p>
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<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Talk Me Down</h2></a>
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    <i>I wanna sleep next to you</i><br/>
<i>But that's all I wanna do right now</i><br/>
<i>And I wanna come home to you</i><br/>
<i>But home is just a room full of my safest sounds</i><br/>
<i>'Cause you know that I can't trust myself with my three A.M. shadow</i><br/>
<i>I'd rather fuel a fantasy than deal with this alone</i>
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    <i>Irretrievable breakdown of the marriage.</i>
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</p><p>Jaina’s eyes stayed glued on that line. She'd read it a dozen times in the soft blue glow of her laptop that illuminated her otherwise dimly lit office. </p><p>She'd completed easily a hundred divorce petitions. Simple ones. Complicated ones.</p><p>This one was fairly simple.</p><p>No-fault. No claim from her regarding Arthas’s assets. She'd stated in the petition that she would split any and all marital debt, and that she would vacate the marital home by the time the divorce was finalized. </p><p>She made no request that Arthas buy her out of it. She knew he couldn't. But she didn't want it.</p><p>Jaina looked away from the computer screen towards the notepad to the side of it slowly. Little scribbled that wouldn't mean much to anyone but her. Shorthand that she often used in court that was only meant to be legible enough for her own purposes. </p><p>She turned her attention back to the petition she'd finished hours ago, yet kept going over again and again.</p><p>She'd had to change a few things this time. There were more assets now than the last time she'd opened this document a few years ago. More concessions to be made.</p><p>This time was different, though. </p><p>This time, she had a list of attorneys she had loose ties with that she might convince to represent her, because she didn't dare represent herself. Not against Arthas and his family.</p><p>She would call them tomorrow. It was too late in the evening to start all that, now. </p><p>And besides, she had plans.</p><p>As far as Arthas knew, she had another meeting at the shelter. He had plans of his own, so it didn't much matter that Jaina had no such meeting scheduled. It didn't much matter that she would be at the bar. </p><p>None of it mattered anymore.</p><p>She was ready to be done. </p><p>So ready, in fact, that she looked up at Arthas impassively as she tabbed out of the petition and into another document as he opened her office door and stepped in.</p><p>Maybe he'd seen the flash of the window changing in the reflection of her glasses, but Jaina doubted it. He never noticed anything, why would he start now?</p><p>“What are you working on?” He asked as he stood there with his hand on the door knob. He already had his keys in the other.</p><p>“Preparing a few things for my meeting tonight.” Jaina responded simply. “You're going to the clubhouse?”</p><p>Arthas looked at her for a while without answering. Just long enough to make her uncomfortable.</p><p>“Yeah. I'll be out late.” He finally said as he began loosening his hold on the door.</p><p>“Goodnight, then.” Jaina said quietly before looking back down at her keyboard.</p><p>He was gone a moment later, and she realized for the first time just how strange she felt. Like she was floating somewhere else looking down at her own life. </p><p>She reached over for her phone numbly when she heard Arthas’s car start in the garage and pulled up Sylvanas's text thread.</p><p>
  <i>Are you still free tonight?</i>
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    <i>I am. Valeera is teaching Elly how to close tonight and she says I’ll just stress them both out if I don't take the night off.</i>
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  <i>I'll be there in half an hour if that's alright.</i>
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    <b>Definitely alright. It feels like it's been forever since I've seen you.</b>
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</p><p>Jaina locked her screen and leaned back in her chair as she shut her laptop and drummed her fingertips against it. It had only been a week since they were last together, yet it really did feel like ages. The thought made Jaina ache inside in a way that had nothing to do with sex. </p><p>The feeling she'd been battling for weeks now compounded a million times over on the drive to the bar. She'd left the radio off, and the only sound that accompanied the burning of her eyes and her silent tears were the road passing under the tires of her car and her own pulse pounding in her ears. </p><p>She took a moment to gather herself a block over where she'd parked. A moment to grip her steering wheel so hard that the leather creaked in protest against her palms.</p><p>And then it passed. She drifted back into that strange space of numbness she'd been existing in and out of lately. It gave her time to pull down the visor and fix her hair and her makeup. It was then that she realized she hadn't put any on. That she hadn't even put her contacts in. She was still just as she had been all day. Her hair up in a slightly messy bun. Her horn-rimmed glasses on the bridge of her nose.</p><p>Ah, well. At least she'd grabbed a jacket on her way out the door. It was snowing again.</p><p>She realized as she trudged through the snow around the block towards the street the bar was on that she should have been feeling the cold more than she was. She should have been feeling a lot of things more than she was.</p><p>Her hands barely cooperated enough to send off a quick text to Sylvanas announcing herself by the time she’d dipped into the alley that led to the back stairway and to safety. Or at least, what little safety this life had left to offer her. </p><p>It was Sylvanas and not Jaina who noticed she was shivering. </p><p>It was Sylvanas who helped her out of her coat and hung it near the door after shaking the snow off it. Jaina wasn't doing much of anything, at all. She even stayed quiet as she handed Sylvanas her bag when she reached for it. </p><p>“Everything okay?” Sylvanas finally asked as she finally locked the door now that she was less concerned that Jaina was going to die of exposure. </p><p>“Not particularly.” Jaina responded quietly, and Sylvanas’s face and her ears both fell at once. </p><p>“Come get warmed up.” Sylvanas said as she shifted so she could press a hand against Jaina’s lower back in order to urge her towards the sofa where the space heater she ran on top of the central heat was working its little heart out, because Sylvanas hated the cold, power bill be damned. </p><p>Jaina didn't argue. She didn't make it hard for Sylvanas to bundle her up on the couch. She also still hadn't met Sylvanas’s gaze any of the times Sylvanas attempted to catch her attention. </p><p>“Jaina, you're scaring me,” Sylvanas finally said as she stood rather helplessly in front of Jaina where she sat. “A lot.”</p><p>Jaina finally looked up at her, and for the first time Sylvanas was finally able to tell that her eyes were slightly glassy. She second-guessed her tone, then. Had she said that a little sharply? Had she sounded a little panicked? </p><p>“I didn't mean to scare you.” Jaina said as she reached out and caught the hem of Sylvanas’s shirt because it was the easiest thing to reach right then. “I'm just a little...not okay, I guess.” </p><p>Sylvanas slowly moved to kneel down in front of where Jaina was sitting on the couch, and she rested her hands on Jaina’s knees carefully as she looked up at her. “What can I do for you right now?” Her voice was careful and measured. And soft. As soft as she could manage, considering how terrified she was that Jaina was about to tell her that this was over.</p><p>Because Sylvanas had always had that fear somewhere in the back of her mind. It'd just been getting...louder, lately. </p><p>“I don't really know, if I'm being entirely honest. Can we just talk? Can...fuck.” Jaina’s voice had cracked noticeably before she cut herself off, and Sylvanas moved onto the couch with her quickly to sit next to her.</p><p>She still didn't quite know what to do. Not with Jaina hiding her face in her hands looking engulfed by the blanket she was wrapped in. Looking terrifyingly small, really. </p><p>“We can talk.” Sylvanas finally said. “About anything. Whatever you want.” </p><p>“Well now I don't know what to say.” Jaina responded as she shook her head and nudged the blanket from around her shoulders. She was burning up, suddenly. </p><p>Sylvanas didn't respond, because Jaina didn't seem to be done. She just seemed like she was thinking. About what, Sylvanas didn't have the faintest idea. </p><p>Until Jaina finally cleared her throat and continued. “I’ve fallen in love with you.” She wasn't looking at Sylvanas. She was staring dead ahead, focused on nothing in particular. “I kept telling myself that it was the attention. The sex. Anything but that. But I wasn't being truthful with myself. The other night when I came here, I was in a state because…”</p><p>Jaina trailed off and swallowed so hard that Sylvanas could see her throat working. </p><p>“Because I took one of your shirts. Just so that I could have something to remind myself that you were real. He found it and threw it away when I told him it belonged to one of the shelter girls. I don't know why, but it was devastating. I mean, that's probably a lie. I do know why. I've just told you why.” </p><p>Sylvanas felt as though she'd just been punched in the gut. She felt the blood rush from her face. It felt like everything in her had just <i>shattered</i>. </p><p>“This is...this is probably too much, then.” She finally managed to whisper. “And you probably came to...I...I understand, I understand. I'm sorry. If this is my fault, I'm sorry.” Sylvanas tried not to let the panic deep into her tone. She wasn't very successful.</p><p>Yet, all Jaina could do was look down at her own hands and the way they trembled.</p><p>“I'm leaving him.” Jaina whispered, as though if she said it too loud he might hear her, somehow. “And I wanted you to know that even though I'm leaving him for my own sake, I do love you. And I don't expect anything from you. I don't need you to save me. I don't need your pity or your perfection or all the right words that you always have waiting on the tip of your tongue.” </p><p>Sylvanas stood from the couch without even realizing what she was doing. Her head was spinning so bad she wasn't sure how she was even keeping her balance as she paced across the room. To the kitchen. Back, again. All while Jaina sat where she'd left her almost despondently. </p><p>“I don't expect you to say it back, Sylvanas. I'm not some love-struck teenager.” Jaina finally said, hazarding a glance in Sylvanas’s direction. “I just needed you to know some things, because my life is about to come crashing down around me, and it seemed important.” </p><p>Jaina had been so prepared for this to go terribly, that she hadn't noticed until now that the reason Sylvanas wasn't saying anything was probably because she was crying. Trying not to, yes. Wiping at her face in clear frustration, yes. But crying, nonetheless.</p><p>“Sylvanas, I'm-”</p><p>“I love you, too.” Sylvanas gasped out suddenly, her voice trembling as she ran her hands over her head and tugged for a moment at her own hair. “So fucking much. And if I could make everything that's hurting you go away, I would've done it already. Because every time you come here like this, it feels like I die a little inside. And I probably shouldn't have said any of that, but I'm already fucking up so it doesn't matter. I want you to leave him, Jaina. I want you to leave him because it's killing you to stay. But I also want you to leave him because...fuck. Fuck it. Because I think I could make you happy. And I don't even know why I think that. I live in a fucking loft above a bar. I left a career and decent money for this, and you drive here in a fucking Benz and wear designer heels and your bag is probably worth more than my car, and I can't fucking do any of those things for you so I don't know why I honestly believe that this could be a...a real thing. I don't know why I let myself hope you could really want me beyond all this. But I do. Selfishly, I guess. I want you. I want you more than I have any right to. I want to show you what it's like to be with someone who really fucking loves you. Because I do. I really, really do. Even if I have fuck all else to offer you, I have that. I have <i>so</i> much of that, and-”</p><p>Sylvanas was still stammering and stumbling over her frantic, panicked words as Jaina stood and moved to where she was pacing on the other side of the coffee table. She was still trying to catch her breath and choke back her sobs when Jaina tugged her hard into herself and wrapped her in her arms. </p><p>“I believe you.” Jaina whispered into Sylvanas’s hair as the other woman pressed her face into her shoulder and gripped her shirt so hard against her back, the material nearly tore in her hands. “I believe you, and I know that you could make me happy. I know that you could make me happier than anything else ever has before. But you don't know what he's capable of. What his father is capable of. And you don't deserve to be dragged into it. This is your out. Believe me, I don't want you to take it. I want you to stay and be all the things you've already been for me. But you should. You should walk away right now knowing that I don't blame you. You're too good for me to drag you down with me, whether you believe it or not.” </p><p>“No.” Sylvanas mumbled against Jaina’s shoulder as she somehow stepped even closer to her than she already was. Jaina could feel how tightly her eyes were shut as she pressed her face hard against the crook of her neck. “No, I'm not fucking going anywhere. Please don't ask me to. Not now. Not after all this.” </p><p>Jaina felt her knees nearly give out, then. As it turned out, neither of them was all that steady right then, because a moment later - they were barely managing to hold each other up. </p><p>Jaina realized, suddenly, that the feeling she'd been enduring lately was gone. Or, rather, the lack of feeling. She was now painfully, vividly, all-consumingly aware of everything. </p><p>“I need to lay down.” Jaina whispered. “Or I'm going to throw up.” </p><p>“Fuck. Okay.” Sylvanas exhaled the word more than said it, and she gathered her wits and her balance back about herself and walked with Jaina towards the bed - following her into it as she landed face-first and tried her best to steady her breathing. </p><p>Sylvanas was right there stroking over her back and fussing over her as the panic finally flooded every fiber of her being. She was there through every shuddering breath and every desperate grasp for the nearest pillow or fistful of sheets until it all finally passed.</p><p>Jaina heaved one last sigh, and Sylvanas sagged into the bed at her side in relief as she slid the hand that had been rubbing Jaina’s back up to stroke rather weakly through her hair.</p><p>“I don't want to go.” Sylvanas said once Jaina’s breathing seemed more even. “Please don't ask me to. I don't know if I can.”</p><p>Jaina slowly shifted on the bed until she could turn her head to look at Sylvanas, whose eyes were every bit as red and puffy as her own. </p><p>“All those things you mentioned earlier. The cars and the shoes and the bags?” Jaina’s voice was still a little shaky. A little raspy.</p><p>Sylvanas nodded. </p><p>“I hate all those things. And I certainly don't need them in my life. I lied when I said I don't need you, though.”</p><p>“Now who's the martyr?” Sylvanas asked, her tone soft and breathy. Jaina gave her a little half-smile or acknowledgement that faded quickly as she kept looking into Sylvanas’s eyes.</p><p>“I'm scared, Sylvanas.” Jaina finally admitted after a long, heavy pause. “I'm terrified.”</p><p>“I know,” Sylvanas said, glancing down at Jaina’s hand when she felt it shifting between them to find her own. She offered hers and Jaina took it immediately.</p><p>“I don't even know who is going to agree to represent me,” Jaina continued. “I don't know if you realize how much pull the firm has. How much pull that family has.”</p><p>“I might be able to help with that if you'll let me.”<br/>
Sylvanas said after a moment of thought.</p><p>“How?” Jaina asked, sounding as confused as she looked.</p><p>“Are you familiar with the name Lor’themar Theron?”</p><p>“Who isn't?” Jaina asked incredulously. “Especially after that murder case that was all over the news a while back. Isn't there a Netflix special in the works surrounding that case?”</p><p>Sylvanas sighed and nodded. She couldn't even imagine how much bigger Lor'themar’s head had gotten over it all. His ego had already been nearly insufferable the last time she'd seen him. </p><p>“Yeah. Well, we've been friends for...fuck, I dunno, since High School. We were actually each other's first time? It was hilariously bad and I think the only thing we shared that night was a gay awakening.” </p><p>“You slept with him?! Wait...he’s gay?” Jaina asked incredulously. </p><p>“Kind of. We tried. And yes, he's very gay.” Sylvanas responded with a faint smile. “Almost as gay as I am. Anyway, he'll shit on all of them, I have no doubt. He has no reason to be intimidated.” </p><p>“That would be wonderful, obviously.” Jaina breathed as she shifted around until she was pressed against Sylvanas. </p><p>“I’ll call him tomorrow, then, and give him your contact information.” Sylvanas murmured as she tugged a pillow down from the headboard and tucked it under their heads. </p><p>Jaina sighed heavily as she looked at the v of Sylvanas’s undershirt and the way it exposed how delicate her collarbones were. She was so close that it was a little blurry. Or maybe she was just so done that she couldn’t see straight, anymore. </p><p>“Thank you.” Jaina finally murmured, managing to move one of her hands from where it was folded between them to press beneath Sylvanas’s shirt just so she could feel the warmth of the skin of her stomach beneath her fingertips. “If it ever becomes too much…” </p><p>“I’ll deal with it,” Sylvanas responded simply, pressing a leg between Jaina’s and sliding an arm beneath her head all in one fluid motion that Jaina responded to immediately - fitting herself in against her and letting out another breath. This one shuddered on its way out. “For as long as it takes. I didn’t mean to fall in love, Jaina. I never thought I would, again, and this certainly isn’t an ideal situation. It’s not ideal for either of us. But I’m not walking away from it. There’s nothing he could do that could make me.” </p><p>Jaina pressed her face into Sylvanas’s chest so she could feel the words when they came as well as hear them. So she could let them wash over her and engulf her, entirely. So she could believe them as much as possible, at least for now.</p>
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</div>“Arthas, please. I don’t have time for your paranoia tonight.” Terenas’s voice was gritty with sleep, but Arthas didn’t much care if he’d woken his father up. Not right now.<p>“It's not paranoia. I’m looking at the fucking petition. This is my name, Dad. I’m not being paranoid. Fuck. Here.” Arthas pulled the phone away from his ear quickly and requested a video call that Terenas accepted with a grumble. </p><p>A grumble that was cut short as the screen of Jaina’s laptop came into view and Terenas squinted to read a petition that very clearly listed both Jaina and Arthas’s names. Their assets. Everything. There wasn’t really any mistaking it. Not when Jaina was so adept at putting together clear and concise complaints. </p><p>“Do you believe me now?” Arthas demanded as he ended the video call and brought the phone back to his ear, his eyes still scanning over the document he’d found. The document he’d never expected to find. </p><p>“...Yes. I’m thinking, Arthas. Give me a moment.” </p><p>Arthas didn’t feel like giving his father a moment. “And I swear to god she’s fucking around. I found a shirt in her bag the other day. Cologne all over it. And she hasn’t so much as touched me in months.” </p><p>“Arthas, don’t be ridiculous. She’s too smart to do anything like that if she’s planning this. That’s a no-fault petition.” Terenas said the words, but he wasn’t sure of them. Nothing about this was surprising to him. In fact, he often felt very real sympathy for Jaina. But he needed her. He needed her at the firm, and he needed her to keep his son occupied. </p><p>“Yeah, well, maybe she’s not as smart as you think she is.” Arthas spat out as he slammed the screen of the laptop shut and got up. He’d already forwarded everything to himself. He didn’t need to be in here, anymore. </p><p>Terenas clenched his jaw in frustration on the other end of the line. “I’ll handle this.” He said after a brief pause. “Don’t say anything to her, Arthas. Keep your mouth shut for once.” </p><p>“What are you going to do?” Arthas demanded as he paced across the living room. “I’m going to fucking find this guy and-”</p><p>“You aren’t going to do anything, Arthas. You’re going to keep your god damned mouth shut and not make this any harder for me to clean up than it’s already going to be. Go to the clubhouse. Have a drink.” </p><p>“Fine.” Arthas muttered before disconnecting the call and throwing his phone down on the coffee table next to the empty beer bottles already littering it. He left it there as he grabbed his keys and made his way to the front door. He hadn’t bothered parking his car back in the garage after driving the block a few times waiting for Jaina to leave. </p><p>He certainly hadn’t <i>truly</i> expected to find anything. He never did, when he went looking. But he looked, anyway. Every chance he got. </p><p>He looked for a reason for this to be anyone’s fault but his own.</p>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Hey Leonardo (She Likes Me For Me)</h2></a>
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    <i>Gazing at the ceiling as we entertain our feelings in the dark</i><br/>
<i>The things that we're afraid of</i><br/>
<i>are gonna show us what we're made of in the end</i><br/>
<i>She likes me for me</i><br/>
<i>Not because I sing like Pavorotti</i><br/>
<i>Or because I'm such a hottie</i><br/>
<i>I like her for her</i>
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</div>Jaina smiled softly as Elly took off her little apron and sat down across from her. Valeera had let her off the hook a little early for their last consultation since their trial was the following week. She even managed to devote her attention entirely to the young woman across from her despite the fact that Sylvanas was behind the bar smiling at Valeera as they talked.<p>Nobody knew better than Jaina how hard they both worked, and Jaina found herself glad that Sylvanas had decided to take Elly on. She was a sweet girl. Wonderful with the customers, and incredibly sharp. She was also so involved in her own case that it surprised even Jaina. It kept her on her toes.</p><p>She was actually enjoying working with her a lot as a result. </p><p>It was Sylvanas that walked over to them about half an hour into their meeting and placed a glass of water in front of them both, and Jaina glanced up at her to find Sylvanas shooting her a quick, warm smile as she retreated. Soon enough, though. Tess was outside to pick Valeera up and Jaina was gathering her things to drop Elly back off at the shelter. Except she hung back the way she usually did and handed Elly the keys to get the car warmed up as Sylvanas watched quietly from her spot near the register with her ears lifting in the hopeful way that they usually did.</p><p>As soon as they were alone, Jaina made her way quickly to the bar where Sylvanas was already rounding the corner to meet her. “I can't stay.” Jaina murmured quickly just before they kissed.</p><p>“It's okay.” Sylvanas reassured her quietly before Jaina kissed her again and looked up into her eyes.</p><p>“I'll be gone Sunday and Monday for a conference.” </p><p>Sylvanas nodded her understanding and leaned in to give Jaina a quick hug, assuming their stolen moment would be coming to an end soon. “I'll miss you.”</p><p>“Then come with me.” Jaina murmured against Sylvanas’s cheek as she returned the hug and held Sylvanas close. </p><p>Sylvanas pulled back and looked at Jaina in confusion before glancing down at the feeling of something being pressed against her stomach.</p><p>She reached up to grab hold of it just as Jaina turned away from her and jogged towards the door.</p><p>A plane ticket. First class. </p><p>“Jaina!”</p><p>But Jaina was already gone. </p><p>Sylvanas stared down at the ticket for a while longer before slipping her cell phone from her back pocket and dialing Valeera’s number.</p><p>“Hey, sorry if I'm interrupting, but can you handle the shipment Monday? I may be going out of town, uh...Sunday afternoon?”</p><p> </p><p>There was silence for a beat or two on the other end of the line before Valeera finally processed what Sylvanas had said. </p><p>“Yeah. Not a problem. Are you being whisked away?”</p><p>“I'll be back in plenty of time to open Tuesday.” Sylvanas said, avoiding her question entirely.</p><p>Valeera was silent again, and Sylvanas frowned as her phone vibrated against her face.</p><p>She pulled it away and stared down at the gif Valeera had sent her.</p><p>
  <i>Alright, then. Keep your secrets.</i>
</p><p>Sylvanas sighed heavily and lifted the phone back to her ear.</p><p>“Valeera, <i>please</i>.”</p><p>“I've got you, Syl. Relax, okay? I'll see you Tuesday.” </p><p>“Thank you.” Sylvanas responded almost wearily as she finally began making her way upstairs, examining the ticket once again.</p><p>“No problem, but hey - we just got to Tess's house and I'm trying to get laid, so-”</p><p>“Valeera, you're being so crass, please.”</p><p>Valeera went quiet for a moment after Sylvanas heard Tess's chiding words come through the call, and then they were both laughing over something that Sylvanas wasn't sure she wanted to know about. </p><p>“Goodnight, Valeera. Tell Tess I said goodnight, too.”</p><p>“Oh, I'll tell her more than th-”</p><p>Sylvanas ended the call abruptly with a fond smile on her face and reached beneath her bed for a seldom-used suitcase she kept stashed there.</p><p>First class.</p><p>Jesus Christ.</p><p>She didn't even know how to <i>dress</i> for first class.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>Sylvanas hates flying.<p>She'd always hated flying.</p><p>But First lass had been nice. She'd noticed Jaina wasn't there, and as it turned out - she'd flown business class. Sylvanas figured that out when she realized you got wifi with a plane ticket this pricy and got flooded with text messages from both Valeera and Jaina.</p><p>She shot off a quick update in regards to her wellbeing to Valeera, and then settled back in her seat to pull up Jaina’s texts.</p><p>
  <i>Are you comfortable in there? There’ll be a car waiting for you when you land. Your room number is 619 at the hotel.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <b>It's comfortable, but I wish you were here.</b>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>I wasn't sure if any of the partners had decided to go to the conference. I wanted to err on the side of caution.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <b>Makes sense. I had champagne. And a gin and tonic. The included drinks definitely help with my irrational fear of flying.</b>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>Poor baby. I promise this weekend is going to be worth your while.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <b>I still haven't really come to terms with the fact that I'm going to be spending a weekend with you. I'm going to start crying in first class.</b>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>Crying in first class is more likely than you think.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <b>You're ridiculous. I love you.</b>
  </i>
</p><p>There was a pause that lasted long enough that Sylvanas began to wonder if she should have said that at all before Jaina finally saved her.</p><p>
  <i>Sorry. I was crying in business class. I love you, too. I have to do something for an hour or two when we first arrive and then I'm free for the evening. Right now I might sleep. Putting this together was a lot.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <b>I'll see you in a little while, then. Sleep tight.</b>
  </i>
</p><p>The landing was the worst part, especially considering the fact that Sylvanas had dozed off right along with Jaina and barely woken up in time to get her belt fastened. </p><p>The airport was much bigger than the one they'd left from, not that that was saying much. It was big enough that Sylvanas could only be half-certain she caught an unintentional glimpse of Jaina before she went looking for the car that was supposed to be waiting for her, already talking on her cellphone and looking as serious as anything as she headed deeper into the airport.</p><p>Sylvanas ignored the mild ache in her chest and sighed quietly, adjusting her bag on her shoulder and preparing herself for the jostling she was sure she was about to receive before she finally made it to the safe-haven of the waiting car. Not a cab, for sure. This car came with a driver that let her into the back and didn't ask any questions because he knew where to take her already. </p><p>To an exceedingly nice hotel.</p><p>Of course.</p><p>An exceedingly nice hotel that contained her exceedingly nice room that overlooked the city below. It wasn't just a room, really. Sylvanas realized that as she put her bag down and looked around only to find there wasn't a bed because she was in the sitting area of...her full suite. Complete with what looked to be a stocked minibar and a gift basket that she walked towards with her eyes narrowed in suspicion.</p><p>She plucked the little envelope out from under the basket and opened it curiously.</p><p>
  <i>I hear this hotel has a nice spa. I booked you two hours, so you'll have to let me know how it was this evening.<br/>
-J</i>
</p><p>Sylvanas read the little typed note again and found herself wondering if this was the type of thing money allowed you to do. Have notes placed in hotel rooms you hadn't even arrived at yet.</p><p>She glanced towards the gift basket, then, and smiled faintly as she pulled a robe out of it. She hadn't packed one, of course. And this one was much nicer than the ones the hotel provided. The rest of the basket was mostly snacks and things of that nature. Some things Sylvanas recognized, and some she didn't. </p><p>And then she spotted the certificate for her spa booking and realized she only had five minutes to get downstairs. </p><p>The Sylvanas of two hours later was much the same, really. Her skin was a little more clear. Her tension was a little more manageable. </p><p>But she couldn't help the way her thoughts had wandered. The way they kept wandering even as she rode silently in the elevator and then made her way back to her hotel room. At least she'd packed a nice pair of joggers and a decent enough v-neck for the occasion. With her hair up in a messy bun and her robe still tied loosely around her waist, she almost felt like she belonged here as she buzzed herself past the door of her room and stepped inside fully expecting to find her room the same as she left it. Empty.</p><p>But it wasn't. It was full, suddenly. With the woman sitting on the sofa in the lounge area of the suite looking up at her with an unreadable expression on her face.</p><p>Jaina looked so different right then. She was dressed to the nines. Tailored suit, pencil skirt, stilettos and all. Even her glasses were different. Thin, metal-framed ones sat where her thicker more casual ones usually did, and her hair was in an up-do that Sylvanas was fairly certain Jaina hadn't done, herself. Then there was the dress shirt beneath the jacket. Black as night and unbuttoned a little too far, no doubt a recent development. Sylvanas would've been itching to get out of those clothes, too, after a four-hour flight followed by whatever Jaina had to attend to when she'd first landed. </p><p>But damn she looked good, sitting there with her legs crossed and one of her arms draped casually along the back of the sofa.</p><p>Sylvanas didn't realize she was staring until Jaina offered her an almost questioning smile.</p><p>“Sorry.” Sylvanas breathed as she quickly untied her robe and hung it on the back of the door, though she still hadn't joined Jaina on the couch. “You just look really good right now, and I think it just hit me all at once how far away we are from everything back home.”</p><p>“Far enough.” Jaina agreed, and that unreadable expression flickered with a little sadness. </p><p>“You didn't have to do all of this…” Sylvanas continued, gesturing around the room a little helplessly. </p><p>“I know I didn't,” Jaina responded with a faint shrug and a sigh. “Sylvanas I've worked so hard for what I have, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do anything like this for you, again. Certainly not any time soon. So let me do it just this once.” </p><p>“Okay.” Sylvanas agreed, then, without hesitation, and finally moved to sit next to Jaina on the couch. </p><p>“Does it feel different?” Jaina asked quietly as Sylvanas looked at her, all while moving the hand that had been resting on the couch to cradle Sylvanas's cheek. “Do you want it less?”</p><p>“No,” Sylvanas said just as softly, but with utter conviction. “No, I've never wanted you more.”</p><p>Jaina smiled then and her brow furrowed while she watched Sylvanas turn her head to press a kiss to her palm that lingered for a long while. </p><p>Long enough that Jaina produced a little box from the inside pocket of the breast of her jacket. “Will you wear this?” She asked as she popped it open with her thumb to reveal a rather simple pendant in rose gold. A small pillar hung from the end of a delicate chain with a date inscribed on it and nothing else.</p><p>Sylvanas reached for it and pulled it from the box carefully to examine it. There was already an unspoken question on her lips when she looked back up into Jaina’s eyes.</p><p>“The day I met you,” Jaina explained simply. “Because no matter what happens, I want you to know that I'm not ashamed. And that I've been yours since the first time we spoke regardless of the circumstances. I want you to know that it was inevitable. That I was always going to find you and fall for you. And that I'll never regret any of it.” </p><p>Sylvanas blinked away the tears that were pooling in her eyes quickly, and before she could even unlatch the clasp on the necklace - Jaina’s hands were there to help her.</p><p>It hung perfectly against her collarbones just above the top of the collar of her shirt, and Jaina brushed her thumb across it as she uncrossed her legs in order to move closer for a hug that turned into them just holding each other for a long while. </p><p>Inevitably, though, the soft kisses Sylvanas was sneaking in along Jaina’s jaw drew a slightly sharper breath from her, and Jaina’s hand slipped down Sylvanas’s chest over her shirt in turn. </p><p>“Get me out of this suit.” Jaina whispered when Sylvanas gasped against her ear when she grazed her hardened nipple through her shirt. </p><p>Sylvanas pulled away from Jaina’s neck slowly, but her hands were already working at the buttons of her pressed dress shirt by the time she looked down at what she was doing to find a deep red bra cresting the tops of Jaina’s breasts with lace. The kind that was sheer enough in the front that Sylvanas could see everything through the material.</p><p>She paused for a moment as her eyes lingered and her hands stayed still where they'd been about to untuck the shirt from Jaina’s skirt. </p><p>She remembered herself quickly and glanced up at Jaina, who was smiling at her faintly. There was amusement playing at her lips and no small amount of lust in her eyes, and Sylvanas was fairly certain her heart was going to pound out of her chest when she pushed the suit jacket from Jaina’s shoulders and helped her out of both it and her shirt.</p><p>“At the risk of sounding like a teenage boy, you are so fucking sexy, Jaina…”</p><p>Jaina chuckled quietly, and even as confident as she seemed - a blush had risen in her cheeks in response to the breathy compliment as Sylvanas found the zipper of her skirt and began to lower it. </p><p>“You don't sound like a teenage boy,” Jaina countered quietly as she lifted her hips so Sylvanas could slide the skirt down her legs, revealing dark, plain stockings that attached to red lace garters and panties that were equally as sheer as the bra they matched to and anything but plain. “But I enjoy making you feel like one.” </p><p>Sylvanas was, admittedly, rather enthralled by Jaina right then. Especially when she stood from the couch with her heels still on and held out a hand to help Sylvanas up off the couch.</p><p>“Do you like this?” She asked in a low, slightly throaty murmur - half for effect, half because she genuinely needed to know.</p><p>Sylvanas slid her hands slowly over the fullness of Jaina’s breasts towards her hips and down lower, circling to the small over her back to grip at the swell of her ass, most of which was bare. </p><p>“Very much.” Sylvanas breathed as she looked up into Jaina’s eyes. Their height difference was significant now, with Sylvanas in a pair of slippers and Jaina in formidable heels. </p><p>Sylvanas was unbothered. Very unbothered. </p><p>“Is that what this means?” Jaina asked as she grazed her fingertips along Sylvana’s ears to find them held a little higher than usual, and warmer.</p><p>Sylvanas’s lips curled into a smile as she ducked her head down and pressed a kiss to the underside of Jaina’s jaw. “Yeah,” she murmured against it before kissing the same place again. “That's what that means.”</p><p>Jaina’s head was tilted back in response to the feeling of Sylvanas’s fangs finally coming into play along her shoulder, and she caught the other woman’s head with the back of her hand to press her closer. </p><p>“Jaina-”</p><p>“Please.” </p><p>Sylvanas hesitated for a moment as she brushed the tip of her nose along Jaina’s collarbone and pulled her hips closer with the grip she still had on her ass. </p><p>The mark she left after she’d latched on was light. A little bruising from her fangs nearly breaking Jaina’s skin. A little darkening in between. </p><p>As controlled as it had been, it left Sylvanas as breathless as it had left Jaina - and Sylvanas’s hands were finally moving again. Trailing along the waistband of Jaina's panties until her thumbs found the hollows of her hips and pressed against them while her fingertips dragged those paper-thin underwear ever lower.</p><p>“Are you here for the rest of the night?” Sylvanas asked as she kissed over the mark she had only just left. The things that did to her - seeing such clear evidence left on Jaina’s skin - god, words couldn't describe. </p><p>“I'm here until mid-morning.” Jaina responded as she finally slipped her heels off one by one - holding onto Sylvanas’s shoulders for balance as they were tossed gently to the side. </p><p>“That's the best thing I've ever heard.” Sylvanas said as she slipped her arms around Jaina’s waist now that they stood a bit more evenly. “Might I suggest really good sex and then dinner and then phenomenal sex?”</p><p>Sylvanas was already walking them through the sitting room towards the bedroom when she asked, and Jaina was already working at the string holding her joggers around her hips. </p><p>“Phenomenal first, then dinner, then really good.” Jaina offered, and Sylvanas smiled against her lips when they stopped moving because Jaina’s thighs had found the back of the bed.</p><p>“You seem toppy tonight.” Jaina whispered as Sylvanas unhooked the garters from Jaina’s panties.</p><p>“Mhmm,” Sylvanas hummed against her ear as she slowly and carefully slid the panties down before stroking back up Jaina’s stocking-clad legs. “Leave these on…”</p><p>“Okay,” Jaina breathed as Sylvanas ran the curled front of her hand slowly down her stomach only to stop just before she reached Jaina’s sex. “But only if you take these off.” She bargained, tugging at both Sylvanas’s shirt and joggers that were now barely hanging onto her hips.</p><p>“I can do that.” Sylvanas agreed easily, finally allowing her pants to fall to the floor. She removed her shirt and backed Jaina up onto the bed all in one motion, and Jaina found herself on her back looking up at Sylvanas as the other woman straddled her. </p><p>Sylvanas thought briefly that, if she were a petty person, she might wish she could ask Jaina’s husband how you could possibly treat this woman like anything other than the goddess that she was. How you could look at her and not realize how lucky you were. How you could not want to kiss the sparse freckles that dusted the pale skin of her shoulders and her chest. </p><p>And that was just on a normal day. </p><p>This was Jaina in a full set of lingerie looking up at her with her eyes half-lidded. This was Jaina touching over her own breast through the sheer lace of her bra and teasing one of her own nipples into a peak harder than it already was. </p><p>“Earth to Sylvanas,” Jaina murmured quietly as she slid a coaxing hand along the other woman’s thigh. “Are you going to fuck me, or stare at me? Because I'm feeling like I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go, right now.”</p><p>Sylvanas laughed quietly, more at herself than anything, and slowly shifted her lithe body along Jaina’s, finding Jaina’s thighs already parting for her to allow her to lay her hips between them.</p><p>Jaina gasped when Sylvanas drew her hands away from her own breasts to pin them to the bed on either side of her shoulders against the bed. </p><p>She couldn't complain about the view, though, when Sylvanas tilted her head to the side to allow Jaina to watch as she ran her tongue over the barely-there material Jaina’s nipple was straining against. </p><p>“I'll fuck you, Jaina. Don't worry.” Sylvanas murmured just before she gave that same nipple a bite that was only firm enough for the tug that came after before letting go. “I just want to savor it. Have you seen yourself tonight?” </p><p>Jaina worked her wrists in the grip Sylvanas had on them, but only half-heartedly as she arched her hips upwards in hopes that Sylvanas might meet her movement and provide her with even the smallest amount of friction and relief. </p><p>“I haven't, no.” Jaina breathed in a sigh of contentment when Sylvanas finally moved her hips subtly. Whether or not she'd meant to or her body was just rebelling against her own pace, Jaina couldn't be too sure. </p><p>Sylvanas lifted her head slowly in response to Jaina’s answer - dragging the bridge of her nose along the underside of her jaw until Jaina had little choice but to turn her head sideways where her eyes were met with a mirror that was mounted to the wall - clearly meant for dressing - but large enough that Jaina could see them both in it.</p><p>God, she could've come right then and there if Sylvanas had so much as grazed her. To see her own soft, pale body beneath Sylvanas’s darker, much harder one was one of the most erotic things she'd ever experienced. </p><p>Until Sylvanas turned her own head and caught Jaina’s gaze with her own in the mirror when she moved her hips again in a way that caused the muscles in her sides to flex for Jaina’s benefit. </p><p>“You should see yourself more often,” Sylvanas whispered to the reflection of Jaina in the mirror before she bowed her head again and peppered little bites and kisses along her neck so she would keep her head turned the way it was. “And you should watch me make you come right now, because you're breathtaking when you come for me.” </p><p>Jaina couldn't really argue with that. She didn't really <i>want</i> to argue with that, as Sylvanas shifted her hips back just enough to allow her hand to slip between them. </p><p>At first, Jaina found it slightly strange to look over at herself in the mirror. To watch the way her own eyes nearly fluttered shut as Sylvanas slowly pressed two of her fingers into her to the hilt. But then, she was able to see Sylvanas, too. And that sight, at least, was one worth looking at. </p><p>“Hard.” Jaina whispered as Sylvanas curled her fingers a few times in a way that had Jaina gasping around the word. </p><p>Sylvanas’s eyes flicked to Jaina’s in the mirror, and she held her gaze as she parted her lips against Jaina’s jaw to graze the skin there with her fangs before she wound up pressing a kiss beneath her ear. </p><p>“You want it hard?” Sylvanas asked, her voice low and breathy as Jaina watched her shift her lower body so that her knees were dug into the bed and her hand was supported by her hips. </p><p>“Fuck,” Jaina gasped when Sylvanas’s free hand came up to grasp and knead at her breast - causing the lace to catch and drag against her nipple. “Yes. Sylvanas, please.”</p><p>Jaina had never watched herself beg before, either. She'd never seen the wanton expression on her own face. A sight that only deepened the flush already present in her skin. But again, there was also Sylvanas. The subtle shifting of muscle under her skin as her hips began working between her legs in time with her fingers. </p><p>There were the sounds and sensations of her heavy, excited breathing against her shoulder. </p><p>Jaina was already trembling when Sylvanas pushed her bra up and over her breasts so that the next time she sought out Jaina’s chest with her mouth, there was nothing in her way. </p><p>And between the firm suction against her nipple interspersed with the stinging, welcome presence of teeth and the firm thrusts that shook them both each time, Jaina was getting close to coming as quickly as she had every time with Sylvanas. It was just different this time. Watching the way Sylvanas almost worshipped her with each movement. </p><p>Jaina slid her hands along Sylvanas's back when she suddenly remembered that was a thing that she could do, and Sylvanas let out a shuddering groan against her blissfully aching nipple when she left a trail of welts in the wake of her nails. </p><p>“Don't stop,” Jaina gasped as her back arched hard off the bed only to be pressed back down by the strength of Sylvanas’s movements. “Please. I'm so close.”</p><p>Sylvanas didn't stop, of course. But she did reach up with the hand not currently working between Jaina’s legs to hold Jaina’s chin in a gentle, yet firm grip. To keep her eyes on the mirror. </p><p>“Come for me.” Sylvanas panted as she leaned over her and found the mark she'd left earlier only to double down on it - latching onto the already faintly bruised skin with her teeth and sending a shockwave of exquisitely painful pleasure through Jaina’s already over-stimulated body.</p><p>Jaina tried her hardest to keep her eyes open, if only to see the way Sylvanas looked down at her as her quiet, breathy groans turned into something that tore from her throat. Keening, broken sounds that Sylvanas drank in devotedly with her lips parted and her brows furrowed. Like she was memorizing everything about Jaina in that moment. </p><p>Eventually, it was a battle that Jaina lost. As her eyes finally fell shut, Sylvanas released her chin and shuddered against her before she rested some of her weight down to give her own trembling thighs and arms a break. </p><p>In the haze of the afterglow of her orgasm, Jaina found the welts she'd left with her nails in the skin of Sylvanas’s back and stroked along them lazily with her palms.</p><p>In turn, Sylvanas found her bite and pressed a soft, apologetic kiss against it.</p><p>“You might have to cover this up,” Sylvanas whispered breathlessly. “Sorry.”</p><p>Jaina reached for the back of Sylvanas's head and drew it down so she would rest her cheek against her shoulder.</p><p>“I'm not going to do that,” Jaina murmured, sounding at least mostly coherent. “That belongs to me.” </p><p>Sylvanas couldn't help the little swell of pride she felt, then. But even as blissful as their current position was, she forced herself up and helped Jaina up, too. </p><p>Sylvanas found herself struck, again, by an entirely different kind of beauty. The still pushed up bra, the glasses, the mess that had become of her hair. </p><p>And especially the mark.</p><p>Yet, it was Jaina who finally reached out first. Just to brush her fingertips against the pendant that hung delicately against the flushed skin of Sylvanas’s chest. </p><p>“This looks really nice on you.” Jaina observed, and Sylvanas glanced down at it before she caught Jaina’s hand with her own and pulled her closer.</p><p>“I love it,” Sylvanas murmured against Jaina’s temple before kissing it. “I made a mess of you. Hang on.”</p><p>Jaina sat - still, and faintly amused as Sylvanas unhooked her bra with a little difficulty now that it was hopelessly twisted. Her glasses came off next, and were handled with care as Sylvanas leaned over in front of her to leave them folded safely on one of the bedside tables. </p><p>As sweet as it was, Jaina couldn't help be distracted by Sylvanas’s nakedness, and it only took a moment or two for Sylvanas to notice the way her eyes lingered.</p><p>Jaina figured her staring session was up when she saw Sylvanas’s eyes flick in her direction and a little smile curving the corners of her lips. </p><p>“I wonder if I'll ever get used to seeing you like this...” Jaina mused as she moved towards the headboard and tugged Sylvanas along with her until she was kneeling over her lap and Jaina’s shoulders had something to rest against. </p><p>“I often wonder the same thing about you,” Sylvanas admitted as Jaina trailed her fingertips along the faintly defined lines of muscle in Sylvanas’s abdomen. “So did that count as 'phenomenal’?”</p><p>“Not yet,” Jaina responded with a lazy laugh. “I still have to see if I can meet the bar for you.” </p><p>Sylvanas lifted a brow and drew in a sharp breath when Jaina’s hands trailed higher and traced the undersides of her breasts. </p><p>“You're so wet.” Jaina observed when Sylvanas shifted against the feeling of Jaina’s thigh moving up between her legs. </p><p>“Well, yeah,” Sylvanas said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. She went quiet for a moment, then, and glanced towards the mirror before looking back at Jaina. “You can watch me, too, you know.” </p><p>It was an offer Jaina hadn't expected. Hadn't even considered. But she followed right along with Sylvanas until she was kneeling near the edge of the bed facing the mirror and, when Jaina settled behind her, leaning back as Jaina watched her from over her shoulder. </p><p>“Well, this is a lot.” Jaina’s voice was a little lower and huskier than it had been as Sylvanas spread her legs enough that Jaina could see glistening skin reflected back at her. </p><p>“Is it?” Sylvanas asked as her hands found Jaina’s thighs on either side of her own. “Do you like it?”</p><p>“I would've thought that goes without saying, but yes.” Jaina’s eyes lingered on the reflection of Sylvanas’s for a while longer then, before her hands returned to what they'd been doing before. Trailing slow, teasing touches just beneath the soft curves of Sylvanas’s breasts as her chest began to move a little unevenly beneath Jaina’s hands. </p><p>Jaina had no idea just how much she was going to like this until Sylvanas moved one of her hands from Jaina’s thigh and slid it down the front of her own body to spread herself open for Jaina rather obscenely, yet beautifully all at once. </p><p>Everything about it screamed ‘this is for you’ in a way that Jaina couldn't deny. And she wanted it terribly. She wanted this to be for her, always. </p><p>“Can you touch yourself?” Jaina finally managed to ask as her fingertips trailed circles around dark, sensitive nipples. </p><p>“For you?” Sylvanas asked, already dipping her middle finger low enough to circle around her own entrance, gathering some of the wetness along her fingertip and ragging it back up towards her clit.</p><p>“Yes,” Jaina whispered, realizing suddenly that her mouth had gone dry and her tongue wasn't feeling particularly cooperative. “For me.” </p><p>“I can do that.” Sylvanas murmured, her lips staying parted after she spoke when she finally began brushing her slick fingertips along her own clit. </p><p>All the while, Jaina kept kneading gently at her breasts and occasionally tugging softly at her nipples - holding her close even as her chest arched towards the attention. </p><p>Until Sylvanas reached for one of her hands and pulled it downward, past where she was working her own clit. “I want your fingers, Jaina. Please.” </p><p>Jaina quickly obliged - finding Sylvanas so wet, there was no resistance as she gradually began pumping into her. </p><p>When Sylvanas’s hand releases her own and returned to Jaina’s thigh, Jaina noticed the rhythmic way she was kneading it. A rhythm that matched the pace Jaina had set, and one that Sylvanas’s fingertips fell into against her clit before long. </p><p>Jaina abandoned Sylvanas's breast in favor of wrapping an arm around her middle to give herself more leverage behind the thrusting of her fingers. But more so because of the expression on Sylvanas’s face. The furrow of her brows and the part of her lips and the utterly raw vulnerability of her need. </p><p>“Jaina,” Sylvanas gasped her name as her head rolled back against Jaina’s shoulder. “Can I come? Fuck, please. Please.”</p><p>Jaina’s entire world fell from beneath her in response to that question and the way it had been asked. She was confronted, again, like she had been many times before with Sylvanas, with an entirely new feeling. </p><p>Sylvanas had just asked for her permission to come.</p><p>This perfect, gorgeous, attentive woman who was rocking in her arms was trembling with the effort of holding back while she waited for Jaina’s response.</p><p>“Yes,” Jaina breathed quickly when she managed to snap herself back into the moment. “God, fuck. Yes. I want you to come.” </p><p>Jaina paid attention to the way Sylvanas moved her fingers against herself, then. At least, as much attention as she had to spare when she felt the velvety heat her fingers were buried in tightening around them until they could scarcely move. </p><p>Sylvanas came with a series of desperately sharp gasps for breath after she let go of the one she'd been holding. Gasps that were interspersed with quiet, failed attempts at Jaina’s name. </p><p>When Jaina felt Sylvanas trying to keep herself upright, she pulled her down onto the bed with her, instead - and tried her best to help as Sylvanas rolled to face her and wrapped a leg around her hip all at once in an effort to be as close as she could be.</p><p>Jaina reached for Sylvanas’s parted lips and only realized her fingers were still glistening with evidence of her pleasure when her short, sharp breaths felt too cool against her fingertips.</p><p>Sylvanas reached up and grabbed her wrist before she could pull back to wipe them off, and Jaina wasn't sure she was going to survive when Sylvanas bit gently at the tip of one of them before she drew them into her mouth to taste them. </p><p>Once she had, Sylvanas finally relented and rolled slowly onto her back to catch her breath - her lips still wet from Jaina’s fingers, and her legs still splayed haphazardly against the bed. </p><p>“I don't know what to say.” Jaina admitted after a while, letting out a breath that sounded almost like a laugh when Sylvanas flopped one of her hands over to land against Jaina’s shoulder. </p><p>“Say that it was phenomenal,” Sylvanas responded, still looking half-gone and entirely blissed out. “I'm starving.” </p><p>Not only was Jaina just as eager to have dinner, it really had been phenomenal. </p><p>The steaks they enjoyed with their wine a while later were decent. Any other time they might have been outrageously good, really.</p><p>But Sylvanas had set the ‘quality’ bar pretty high for the night, and once she had a meal in her she seemed determined to set it even higher. Jaina reaped the benefits of this new goal far too late into the night considering she was scheduled to be an on-stage speaker at the conference tomorrow. </p><p>But that's what caffeine was for, right?</p><p>And the coffee at this hotel was good. </p><p>Not phenomenal, by any means.</p><p>But Jaina had a feeling that not a whole lot was going to live up to that word again. At least things that didn't pertain to Sylvanas. </p><p>And, as if they knew how precious this weekend really was, they made the most of it. Of each other. They saved all their tears and wishing for the plane ride home. For the text messages they exchanged while they were free to do so. For the promises and reassurances and all the things they both needed to get them through the coming days. </p><p>Jaina had given them both a gift even she couldn't have known the importance of. </p><p>She'd given them a night and a morning that was all their own. </p><p>She'd cemented the idea in their minds that this was what life could be by removing everything else and still finding their love at the center of it all. </p><p>They would need that reassurance in particular sooner rather than later.</p><p>And they both knew it.</p>
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<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Where Does The Good Go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Tags have been updated appropriately as of this chapter.<br/>That being said, this is a very, very heavy chapter. Take care of yourselves, friends. </p>
<p>Special thanks to Redisaid for use of her Warbringers wife and baby names. &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
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  <p>
    <i>Look me in the eye and promise no love's like our love</i>
    <br/>
    <i>Look me in the heart and unbreak broken, it won't happen</i>
  </p>
  <p>
    <i>It's love that leaves and breaks the seal</i>
    <br/>
    <i>of always thinking you would be real</i>
    <br/>
    <i>happy and healthy, strong and calm.</i>
    <br/>
    <i>Where does the good go?</i>
    <br/>
    <i>Where does the good go?</i>
  </p>
</div><b>Sylvanas hadn't stopped staring at the casefile in what felt like years. In reality, she'd only been reading it over for about twenty minutes.</b><p>
  <b>Cindel Daybreaker.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas swallowed thickly as she looked at the photograph. At the darkened eyes and the wilted ears and the sheer exhaustion.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She'd looked so different when they were together all those years ago before life got in the way. Or at least, before Sylvanas went off to college.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>They'd lost each other somewhere in there. Except, Sylvanas had come out the other side only to wind up with a case file on her desk that let her know more than she might ever have wanted to know. She knew, now, that Cindel had a baby. That the baby’s name was Eledrea. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>And that she'd lost the baby shortly before serving a six month jail sentence for possession of a schedule I substance. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas sighed heavily as she shut the file and glanced towards her phone. She knew what she should do. She knew she should call her superiors and tell them she wasn't a suitable person to handle this case. That she would likely have personal biases.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>But she didn't.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She could help. She had to help. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b></b>
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  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><b></b><p>
  <b>Sylvanas knocked quietly on the door of the small apartment Cindel had managed to land through sheer luck considering the current state of public housing. She wasn't ever really all that nervous on first visits. They usually consisted of niceties and too many questions on Sylvanas’s part. You never got into the gritty stuff on first visits, because the good ones had nothing to hide - and the bad ones were good at hiding it. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvia was good at spotting the bad ones, though, and maybe that's why she was nervous, now. She wanted desperately for Cindel to be a good one. Because she'd been so good when Sylvanas went off to school.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>As the door opened on creaky hinges, Sylvanas adjusted the strap of her messenger back on her shoulder and readied a smile that wasn't returned, because it was hard to smile at someone while you were peering at them through the crack of a chain-locked door.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Cindel Daybreaker? It's...well. Your case manager.” Sylvanas stumbled over her own well-practiced introduction as she already began regretting the fact that she hadn't refused Cindel’s case. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas took a step back when the door shut rather quickly, and her ears twitched as the bang was followed by the sound of the chain lock sliding back. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“...Sylvanas?” Cindel’s brow furrowed and Sylvanas tried another smile, hoping it would work this time.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>It seemed to. Somewhat.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You caught me. Anyway, I was assigned your case. If that isn't something you're comfortable with taking our history into account, I can request to have it reassigned.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“No! I...no. No, come inside. Please. I'll make some coffee.” Cindel was already heading towards the kitchen when Sylvanas stepped through the door. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You really don't have to do that.” Sylvanas offered as she locked it behind herself and turned to look around at the familiar tile flooring and the unnaturally ‘wooden’-colored cabinets in the kitchen that was visible from the living room. Still, Cindel seemed to be doing okay. There was a couch, at least. With a coffee table that didn't match her single end table or the lamp that was sitting on it. She looked towards the bedroom out of instinct to find a real bed, though there didn't seem to be a dresser. It was a much better situation than Sylvanas was used to walking into, really.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Don't be ridiculous,” Cindel chided as she poured the grounds into the filter and put the pot on to brew. “You still like it how you used to? No sugar, only cream?”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas’s gaze shifted to where Cindel was looking at her from the kitchen holding up a cheap can of powdered creamer, and she smiled and nodded.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>How long had it been, and she still remembered even after everything that had happened in the time between?</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>It wasn't long before they were each holding one of the only two coffee mugs Cindel currently owned, and Sylvanas was looking down at the form on the clipboard that was balanced on her thigh.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel was utterly forthcoming in a way that surprised even Sylvanas.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She'd been clean for a while. Since the day they'd taken her daughter away, and obviously she hadn't done anything while she was locked up. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“And your intent is to get her back, yes? Eledrea?” Sylvanas asked without really thinking. But she didn't apologize for her brashness. She still had a job to do, regardless of anything else.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Yeah,” Cindel breathed without hesitation. “Yeah, as soon as I'm good. I need to be good, first. I'm getting there.” </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas looked up as Cindel paused and seemed lost in thought for a moment.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You know, I didn't mean to have her,” Cindel finally said as she stared down into her own coffee. “But I want her. I want her, now. More than anything. I just need to be sure I can give her the life she deserves.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You aren't sure, yet?” Sylvanas asked in a gentle tone as she held the tip of her pen against the page she'd stopped writing in a while ago.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“No. I just got out,” Cindel’s eyes flashed up to meet Sylvanas’s. “I'm still trying to get my own shit together, you know?”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“That's good,” Sylvanas reassured as she placed her half-finished coffee on the table in front of her. “I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you get there. I hope you know that.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel nodded faintly. “I believe you. I was terrified all day today knowing a social worker was coming. I guess I got so caught up in…,” she trailed off and swallowed thickly. It was obvious what she'd gotten caught up in. “Anyway, how was the great big world out there? Is it okay if I ask you that, or would you rather not?”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“It's fine. It was alright. It was necessary, anyway. I knew what I wanted to do and I had to get the pedigrees for it.” Sylvanas was working hard not to let her knee bounce. Not to let her jaw clench.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She wanted to apologize for leaving. She wanted to so terribly.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>But she couldn't do that. She couldn't fuck this up. The best apology she could give right now would be to do her job. To do her job to the best of her ability, and help Cindel get her life back on track.<br/></b>
</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><b>It'd been two months, now. Two months of weekly visits. Two months of coffee and of Sylvanas staying a little bit too long, and a little longer each time.</b><p>
  <b>Two months of Sylvanas hearing about the beautiful, perfect little girl who had been born into a bunch of bullshit, yet changed Cindel’s whole world. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Two months of Sylvanas trying desperately not to notice the hand that always crept closer to her without touching her, or the lingering looks, or the shame that sometimes darkened Cindel’s eyes.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Only, Sylvanas didn't blame her for any of this. She'd been doing this long enough to know that sometimes things happened. Sometimes you just...fucked your whole life up. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>But Cindel was trying to change that.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>And maybe that's why it was so easy to remember how she'd felt all those years ago before college when they'd terrorized diners together late at night or laid on the hood of Sylvanas’s car listening to music in dark, abandoned parking lots.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Maybe that's why it was so easy for Sylvanas to slowly place her notebook to the side when, one night, Cindel’s hand finally moved a little further. Far enough to stroke slowly along Sylvanas’s thigh in a way that made her go utterly still and hold her breath.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I know you must think I'm trash, Sylvanas. I know what you must think of me. But I can't wait for you to meet her. She's the only good thing I've ever done.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas glanced towards the hand on her thigh and swallowed thickly. “That isn't true, Cindel. You've done plenty of good things. You just made a mistake.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel smiled a little sadly and reached up towards Sylvanas’s face. She hesitated for a moment before finally deciding on stroking along a lock of hair that had been left out of Sylvanas’s hair tie. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“When all this is over, do you want to go see if that waitress that hated us so much when we were kids is still there?”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas let out a breathy, yet nervous laugh as she looked away when Cindel brushed her fingertips against her ear. Yes. She wanted that. She wanted that so much.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“We have some really important things to focus on right now,” Sylvanas reminded her gently. “After that, we’ll see.” </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel pulled her hand away slowly and watched as Sylvanas gathered her things before she followed her to the door.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She was watching Sylvanas fumble with the lock for a moment before she finally reached out to help her. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I'm sorry,” she said quickly before Sylvanas could even get her hand around the door knob. “I'm sorry if that was weird. I'm just...I'm just really fucking lonely. And I really fucking miss you, and...I'm sorry.” </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas let her forehead fall against the door for a moment before she turned to face Cindel. “You miss what we had,” Sylvanas said almost coaxingly. “And that's okay, because that was a time when you were happy and healthy and safe. I'm standing here in front of you, the physical embodiment of that time. And maybe I shouldn't be, but here I am. And you can't help how that makes you feel.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You were always so good at that. Talking,” Cindel said distractedly when she finally took a step back away from Sylvanas. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas looked down at the floor between them for a moment before she finally opened the door. “I'll see you next week, Cindel. Please be good. You really are getting there.”<br/></b>
</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><b><br/>“No. No, absolutely not. This is way too soon, I'm not-”</b><p>
  <b>“You are,”  The man standing on the other side of Sylvanas’s desk seemed utterly unaffected by the report she'd handed him that he, himself had requested. “I don't have any more time to give you, Ms. Windrunner.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You can't make me approve this,” Sylvanas responded, her eyes and her tone full of steel as she clenched her fist around the pen she was still holding. “I outlined all of this in the report you requested. She's still displaying signs of impulsive behaviors. She needs more time. Give me a month. I…” Sylvanas realized the sound she was hearing was the sound of her heel tapping against the floor, and she grit her teeth as she stopped it immediately. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Please,” She continued in a more even, measured tone. “Please give me another month.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“No. You can have until tomorrow, as your updated report will accurately reflect,” he said on his way out without a second glance. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>The door shut, and Sylvanas stared at it as her skin tingled all along the base of her neck up to her scalp. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She wiped quickly at her eyes and tried to focus her vision as she looked down at her own report to find he hadn't signed off on it. </b>
</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><b>Sylvanas watched a myriad of emotions flicker across Cindel’s face as Sylvanas transferred the bundle of baby elf from her own arms to hers. </b><p>
  <b>She sat next to Cindel as she stared, half in awe and half in fear, at her own child. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>They didn't talk that evening. Not really. Just semantics of Sylvanas’s visit schedule over the observation period. Cindel was far too distracted for anything more in-depth. She was busy making sure she had the right formula and the right size diapers, and she did.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas had seen to that. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She'd even seen to the crib that was currently set up in Cindel’s bedroom. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“You're going to be okay,” Sylvanas finally said quietly as she reached over to give Cindel’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “She really is beautiful, Cin.” </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Yeah,” Cindel said in a breathy whisper while she leaned over the edge of the crib she was putting Eledrea down for the night. “Yeah, she is.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Call me any time you need me,” Sylvanas continued as Cindel looked up into her eyes. “Please.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I will,” Cindel tried to muster a smile, and Sylvanas finally broke and reached to pull her into a careful hug. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel buried her face against Sylvanas’s chest and Sylvanas backed her slowly out of the bedroom so as not to disturb the peacefully sleeping little girl in her crib. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>She stood in the middle of the living room and held Cindel for a long while as she cried - stroking slowly along her back in a desperate bid to soothe her.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“It's going to be okay, Cin. I promise. Just a couple more months and we can go to that diner, yeah? If you still want to? And I'll be here every week. You're gonna do so well. So, so well.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel nodded weakly against Sylvanas, but showed no willingness to let go of her. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I'm scared,” Cindel finally whispered as she pulled back and wiped her eyes with trembling hands.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“It's a scary thing, yeah?” Sylvanas murmured as she reached up to help. “But you aren't alone. I'm here. I'm sorry I wasn't for a long time, but I'm here. And when I'm not, I'm a phone call away.” </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Cindel finally managed a smile, then. A real smile. And Sylvanas felt some of the unbearable tension she'd been battling against melt away from her.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“We’re really going to that diner?” Cindel asked with a laugh that still sounded like leftover tears.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Yeah. Yeah, we're gonna go. The three of us, okay? And that old lady is gonna be in a state about it.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Okay,” Cindel said with a nod, looking like she was trying to will some semblance of fortitude into herself. “Okay, yeah. It's gonna be okay.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“It is,” Sylvanas agreed, reaching to give Cindel’s hand a gentle squeeze before she finally began gathering her things to head out.<br/></b>
</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><b>“911, please state the nature of your emergency.”</b><p>
  <b>“I'm...my name is S- Sylvanas Windrunner. My state agent ID is 4117. I need...I…”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Ma'am, please remain calm so that I can help you.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I need medical assistance at 326 Harwell road apartment 7. Female, thirty-three, unresponsive. Female, eight months, unresponsive.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Okay, have you already started CPR?”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“No,” Sylvanas’s voice broke as she stood there in the doorway frozen. As her eyes, blurred with tears, stayed glued to the sight of Eledrea in Cindel’s arms on the floor, their skin grey and unyielding-looking. Those same tears began burning down her cheeks as she wondered if Cindel had fallen with her, or if Eledrea had managed to crawl there. “No, they're...no, I can't, they're…”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Please stay calm.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“They're dead.” </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>There was quiet on the line for a moment while the dispatcher chattered hurriedly over the radio, and Sylvanas’s grip on her phone grew weaker and weaker.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Okay. I've got help on the way. Tell me what you see. Tell me what might have happened.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Sylvanas’s mouth worked, but she couldn't get the words out at first. It took a long time for her to croak out the words.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I think she overdosed.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Alright. Just stay on the line with me. Help is on the way.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“I'm sorry,” Sylvanas whispered. “I have to go.”</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>“Ma'am? Ma’am…?” </b>
</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>Jaina’s spirits had been up - truly up - for the first time in so long following her call with Lor’themar. He was confident in her case. Reassuring. Already fully dedicated to her best interests. He was absolutely everything a good attorney should be, with a name to go right along with his impressive record.<p>She finally felt like she might come out of this okay. Maybe not unscatched. But...okay. And that was something. </p>
<p>At least, her spirits had been up until she saw Maiev’s name flash across the screen of her phone and lifted it to her ear after pausing to think for a moment how this could possibly be good, considering that Maiev had never called her despite having her number on file. </p>
<p>“Jaina speaking.” </p>
<p>“Jaina, I don’t have a lot of time to talk, so I apologize in advance. Elly didn’t come back to the shelter last night after she left work. They found her this morning.” </p>
<p>“That’s good...does she need a place to stay? I’m assuming she’s in trouble, considering the tone of your voice.” </p>
<p>Jaina felt more than a little uncomfortable about the silence that came next. </p>
<p>“Maiev?” </p>
<p>“The police found her, Jaina. She got into something last night. Not sure what, maybe she still had contact with some people she shouldn’t have. She didn’t make it. Anyway, I really need to get off the phone and try and scrape something together for her funeral arrangements. Our coffers are a little low here, as they always are.” </p>
<p>Jaina felt her breath leave her lungs when she realized what Maiev was trying to say. When it dawned on her that Maiev’s voice was a little raspier than usual, and that it even had a slight waver to it. </p>
<p>“I’ll...um. Please give me the information for the funeral home she was taken to. I’ll cover the costs.” Jaina sounded a little breathless because she still was. </p>
<p>“We don’t generally take donations from law firms, Jaina, but I appreciate the offer. Really.” </p>
<p>“This is a private donation.” Jaina continued, trying to form the right words despite how stunned she was. Trying to remain professional. “I’ll see to it, personally. The cost doesn’t matter.” </p>
<p>Maiev made a noise on the other end of the line, and Jaina heard papers rustling for a moment before she spoke. </p>
<p>“Okay. Well, they’ve informed me a basic cremation would be-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“A service. A full service, Maiev. She had friends there, and friends at the bar.” </p>
<p>There was more silence, then. Jaina could’ve sworn she heard Maiev swallow hard through the otherwise quiet call. </p>
<p>“I’ll let them know, then. Do you have a pen handy?” </p>
<p>Jaina wrote down all the information Maiev had to give her, and the call was over. </p>
<p>Jaina wondered why Sylvanas hadn’t called her, first. </p>
<p>At least, she wondered that until a number she didn’t recognize came up on the screen of her phone before she even had a chance to gather her thoughts. </p>
<p>“Jaina.” </p>
<p>“Hi. Um. I’m sorry to bother you. Sylvanas told me not to because you were at work. It’s Valeera, by the way.” </p>
<p>“Hey,” Jaina breathed, her tone softening considerably. “Are you okay?” </p>
<p>“Uh...yeah. I’m assuming Maiev called you. She said she would.” </p>
<p>“She did. I’m so sorry, Valeera.” </p>
<p>“Listen, I’m good. Really. I’m calling about Sylvanas.” Valeera’s voice cracked just a bit, then, and Jaina felt the ache in her chest deepen considerably. </p>
<p>“Valeera, is she okay?” </p>
<p>“No. She really fucking isn’t, and she doesn’t want me around right now. I don’t know what the fuck to do. I know you probably have important shit going on, but I’m freaking out a little bit. I’ve never seen her like this, and you were the only person I knew to call.” </p>
<p>Jaina stood from her desk immediately and scrambled to grab both her jacket from the back of her chair and her keys from her desk at once. “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes, let me in the back please.” </p>
<p>“Fuck. Thank you. Okay. Thank you.” Valeera sounded like she was just about ready to cry, and that scared Jaina even more. </p>
<p>She didn’t even have time to ask any more questions before Valeera disconnected the call. </p>
<p>Jaina couldn’t get there fast enough. She couldn’t park her car in the back alley and run towards the back entryway fast enough, either. </p>
<p>But when she got there, Valeera was waiting outside for her in the cold, and Jaina jogged up to her only to be grabbed up in a quick, tight hug that she hadn’t been expecting at all. </p>
<p>“Thank you for coming,” Valeera mumbled into Jaina’s shoulder before pulling back. Jaina realized, now, that it looked like Valeera had been crying. “Um, she’s upstairs.”</p>
<p>“What happened?” Jaina asked as she reached out to stroke Valeera’s arm. </p>
<p>“I don’t know. It’s just scaring me. She’s the strongest person I know, and she’s been locked in the bathroom for hours. I could hear her crying through the door and. Fuck. It wasn’t regular crying, you know? It was the shit that fucking tears your heart up in your chest. And she wouldn’t let me in. She’s never done that.” </p>
<p>Valeera went quiet when she realized she was rambling, and she looked down at the ground for a moment before opening the back door to the bar and moving inside. </p>
<p>“You look exhausted.” Jaina remarked quietly as she shut the door behind herself. </p>
<p>“Yeah, I...I was looking for her all night after Maiev called to say she didn’t make it back. Syl was with me. I’m just really fucking glad she didn’t find her. If this has her so messed up, I can’t imagine...you know.” </p>
<p>“You should get some sleep,” Jaina suggested. “Does Tess live nearby?”</p>
<p>Valeera nodded a little numbly. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll call her. Please send me a text or something and let me know, because there’s no way I’m sleeping until I know Syl’s okay.” </p>
<p>As much as her heart went out to Valeera, Jaina could only wait for Valeera to get out her phone and start dialing Tess before she was heading up the stairs to Sylvanas’s loft. She didn’t bother knocking at the top door, and when she walked through it - she immediately headed for the bathroom. </p>
<p>This time, though, she knocked. </p>
<p>“Valeera, please. Please. I can’t.” </p>
<p>Jaina’s jaw clenched when she heard just how broken Sylvanas’s voice was. It was so hoarse Jaina was certain it must’ve hurt just to talk. </p>
<p>“It’s Jaina, sweetheart. Please let me come in.” </p>
<p>Jaina was listening so hard that she heard a quiet ‘fuck’ on the other side of the door, and then nothing else. </p>
<p>Jaina let out a shuddering breath and began looking around until she spotted a glinting piece of metal atop the frame of the bathroom door. </p>
<p>“I’m coming in, okay? Hang tight.” She said as she pressed the little allen key she’d found into the door knob until the lock popped and she was faced with the sight of Sylvanas huddled into herself in her tub with her face buried in her knees. </p>
<p>“Sylvanas…” Jaina murmured as she discarded her coat on the floor and rushed over to kneel next to the bath. The first thing she noticed was that Sylvanas was shivering. The second thing she noticed, when she reached for her, was that the water in the tub was absolutely frigid. “Oh, god, how long have you been in here? Come on. Right now. Help me get you up.” </p>
<p>Jaina had never been so glad for Sylvanas’s small stature as she was when she helped her out of the tub. Within moments, she’d wrapped her in a towel and helped her towards the bed. She’d also run across the room to retrieve Sylvanas’s little space heater and carried it back over so that it was plugged in and running on her nightstand. </p>
<p>Sylvanas, meanwhile, hadn’t moved. She was still sitting on the edge of the bed dripping wet with a towel barely clinging to her. </p>
<p>“Snap out of it,” Jaina said firmly as she reached out and began drying her off almost roughly. “I need you here with me, Sylvanas. I need you.” </p>
<p>For the first time, Sylvanas’s gaze lifted to meet Jaina’s, and Jaina was struck by the pain in her eyes. Enough so that she was frozen by it for a moment. </p>
<p>“I”m sorry,” Sylvanas whispered suddenly, and Jaina shook her head as she reached up to cradle Sylvanas’s face in the warmth of her hands. </p>
<p>“No, no, no. No sorries,” Jaina breathed almost urgently. “I love you. I need you. And right now, I need to be here for you. I also need you to get under the blankets and get warm, okay?” </p>
<p>Sylvanas nodded, and she seemed to slip away - back into her thoughts - as she moved rather stiffly under the covers. </p>
<p>As soon as Jaina had her tucked in, she sat on the edge of the bed. </p>
<p>Sylvanas reached for her hand without looking, and Jaina quickly grasped it in her own. </p>
<p>They stayed that way for a while. Long enough for some of Jaina’s initial panic to subside enough that she could run her free hand along Sylvanas’s arm as she looked down at her. Actually, Jaina wasn’t too sure how long she sat there before Sylvanas finally spoke. </p>
<p>“I should’ve done better,” She sounded numb. Utterly numb. “I should’ve known she was slipping. It could’ve been different.” </p>
<p>“Sylvanas…” Jaina whispered, almost in disbelief. “Sylvanas, I didn’t notice, either. She was so optimistic about her case.” </p>
<p>“Yeah, but you’re...you <i>were</i> her lawyer. I was…” </p>
<p>“Her boss,” Jaina finished before Sylvanas could search for a different word. “You were her boss. She worked at your bar. You were <i>not</i> her case manager. You run this bar, and you help more people than anyone else that I know, but she <i>had</i> a case manager, Sylvanas. I’ve spoken to him on many occasions.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas blinked slowly and tightened her grip on Jaina’s hand. “Okay.” </p>
<p>She didn’t sound like she’d processed what Jaina said in the least, much less like she’d believed it. </p>
<p>“Sweetheart,” Jaina whispered and leaned over Sylvanas to stroke over her damp hair as she pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Talk to me.” </p>
<p>“It just hurts,” even Sylvanas’s voice sounded small, then. “So much.” </p>
<p>“I know,” Jaina murmured as she moved slowly onto the bed to lay on her side with an arm around Sylvanas over the blankets. She hadn’t even taken off her heels. It hadn’t even crossed her mind. </p>
<p>“You don’t,” Sylvanas said, but it didn’t sound like an accusation. It sounded almost defeated. </p>
<p>“Then tell me.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas swallowed thickly. Her throat already ached. She was fairly certain if she started crying right now she’d wind up hugging the toilet bowl, again. </p>
<p>“I wasn’t honest with you about why I left social work,” She whispered with a weak strug as her vision wandered aimlessly along the ceiling. </p>
<p>“That’s okay,” Jaina reassured as she watched Sylvanas carefully. “You can tell me why. Is that what you want to talk about?” </p>
<p>“I don’t know,” Sylvanas whimpered those words, and Jaina was fairly certain she’d never experienced real heartbreak before that sound met her ears. </p>
<p>Sylvanas drew in a sharp breath, and Jaina reached quickly to catch a tear before Sylvanas even had to worry about it. </p>
<p>“I...my last case...all of that happened. All those things I told you. I just didn’t tell you that she was my highschool girlfriend, or that I left her when I went off to school. Or that she got hooked on coke while I was gone and had that baby. I didn’t tell you that I should’ve turned her case down, but took it anyway. I didn’t tell you that every one of the girls from the shelter is...is her. Is my second chance. I didn’t tell you that I believed I could fix her and that...I don’t know. That I probably still had feelings for her. That I needed to save her, and that I was actually in a position to do just that, and then I failed.” </p>
<p>Jaina felt the tears burning in her own eyes as those words tumbled from Sylvanas - sometimes in a whisper, sometimes in a hurried, trembling murmur. </p>
<p>“And I just keep failing,” Sylvanas finally finished when she was able. </p>
<p>Jaina’s eyes fell shut when Sylvanas rolled onto her side towards her and shifted close enough to press her face against Jaina’s chest and tug desperately at her bath-dampened shirt to get her closer. </p>
<p>“I’ve got you,” Jaina whispered into Sylvanas’s hair as she reached around her to hold the back of her head. “Oh, sweetheart, I’ve got you. You haven’t failed. You haven’t. All you’ve ever done is try. All you ever do is try. You are so fucking good and kind and warm and nurturing. This isn’t your fault. God, Sylvanas, this isn’t your fault.” </p>
<p>“I love you,” Sylvanas mumbled into Jaina’s shirt as she pulled so hard at it that it started to come untucked. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” </p>
<p>Jaina wasn’t sure what Sylvanas was apologizing for. She just knew that it seemed like she really felt like she needed to be apologizing for it, so Jaina didn’t try to stop her this time. Instead, she just kept stroking along her hair and kissing the top of her head until the shudders that had been wracking her body since she first got her out of the tub finally began to die down. </p>
<p>“And I love you,” Jaina finally said when Sylvanas went quiet, again. “I think I’m always going to love you. I think I never want to go back to a life that you weren’t a part of.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas let out a single sob, then. One last expression of the grief that had been consuming her before that, too, became less sharp in the forefront of her thoughts. </p>
<p>“Sleep,” Jaina’s voice was a whisper as she slid her hand down towards Sylvanas’s ear so that she could caress the upper edge of it slow, even strokes with the side of her thumb. </p>
<p>“You’ll be gone when I get up if I sleep,” Sylvanas breathed, clearly already fighting against the utter exhaustion that was threatening to take her. </p>
<p>“I’m not going anywhere today. Or tonight. This is the only place I intend to be until morning. Please don’t worry about anything else. Just know that I’m going to be right here.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas <i>tried</i> to worry about it. She <i>tried</i> to remember if today was the day Jaina was supposed to talk to Lor’themar. To remember if today was one of the days it seemed her husband usually wasn’t home at night.</p>
<p>But she couldn’t. </p>
<p>She just couldn’t think, anymore. But she was trying. </p>
<p>“Shh,” Jaina reached for one of Sylvanas’s hands as it tried to tighten its loosening grip on her shirt, and she twined their fingers together, instead. “Let it go. I’ll take it for now so you can get some rest.” </p>
<p>Jaina felt the last of the fight Sylvanas had in her leave. </p>
<p>Only then did she finally turn her head towards the pillow they were sharing to shed her own silent tears as she kept Sylvanas as close to her as she could.</p>
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<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Everlong</h2></a>
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    <i>And I wonder</i>
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    <i>If everything could ever feel this real forever</i>
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    <i>The only thing I'll ever ask of you</i>
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    <i>You've got to promise not to stop when I say when</i>
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</div>Tess caught Valeera’s gaze in the mirror over her shoulder as she moved to stand behind her, and she reached up to gently tuck a stray wisp of blond hair back into the updo she'd spent all morning on.<p>“You look lovely,” Tess murmured as she rested a hand against Valeera’s side. A hand that Valeera reached for and pulled further around herself until she could feel Tess’s body against her back. </p>
<p>“Thank you for taking me,” Valeera said quietly as she looked away from Tess’s gaze in the mirror and turned to face her. </p>
<p>Valeera hadn't had anything to wear to a funeral until last night. Tess had finally gotten at least that much out of her and driven her to various shops because she couldn't seem to find the right outfit.</p>
<p>And Tess knew Valeera too well by now to think that that was for shallow reasons. In fact, she knew her well enough to know that it was likely because that was what Valeera had chosen to focus on in an attempt to push everything she was dealing with aside.</p>
<p>She'd tossed and turned in bed each night on the two days leading up to the service. She hadn't asked to stay with Tess while the bar was closed. But Tess hadn't needed her to. </p>
<p>“I'll go home tonight,” Valeera said quietly as she fretted at the sleeve of Tess’s dark-colored stress. “After the funeral, I mean. If we could maybe come here for a while, first.”</p>
<p>“Or you could stay with me,” Tess suggested as she tilted Valeera’s chin then stroked along her cheek. “For as long as you need or want to.” </p>
<p>Valeera thought that over for a little while before she finally stepped out of Tess’s arms and walked past her towards her bed. She sat on the edge of it and ran a fingertip along some of the quilted stitching in the duvet. She'd insisted they get ready the moment she woke up despite the fact that they didn't need to leave for at least another hour, and Tess had, of course, gotten ready right along with her. </p>
<p>“You're gonna get tired of me, you know,” Valeera remarked as Tess watched her ears sink even lower than they had been all morning. “If I stay.” </p>
<p>“That simply isn't true, Valeera,” Tess said as she crossed the bedroom to seat herself next to her. “I know you must be hurting terribly right now, but it isn't. You're dealing with enough as it is without adding my perceived future rejection of you to the mix.”</p>
<p>Valeera’s eyes slipped shut and she sighed, and Tess reached out to run her hand along Valeera’s arm just beneath the cut of her sleeveless dress. </p>
<p>“I'm not even this person,” Valeera whispered as she leaned sideways until their shoulders met and Tess’s arm slid around her easily. “I guess I've never given myself a reason to be this person until I met you.”</p>
<p>“What do you mean, love?” Tess asked as she rested her cheek atop Valeera’s head. </p>
<p>“I mean I don't let myself…<i>care</i> for people the way I've let myself go with you, aside from Sylvanas. I guess, aside from the fact that I really did like that girl, this had all just reminded me of what I am, and how that could've been me.”</p>
<p>Tess had known, of course, that that was likely why Valeera had been taking this so incredibly hard. Or at least she'd suspected as much, now that she knew a little more about Valeera and her life. </p>
<p>“Well, no. It couldn't have been you, actually. Because you're right here with me. You're a bar manager with your own apartment, and you're not even thirty, yet. But even if you weren't those things, it wouldn't change the way I feel.”</p>
<p>Valeera let out a breathy almost-laugh and shrugged as she let her head fall a little. “Okay. So in five years when you're still waiting for me to ‘feel’ the way that you do, you won't be tired of it, then?”</p>
<p>“Feeling and saying are entirely different,” Tess responded easily. “I don't need words, Valeera. I never will. And I would still very much like it if you stayed with me for a while. It would make me feel better.”</p>
<p>That was a cheap trick, and Tess knew it. Valeera was a people-pleaser, whether she realized it or not. At least, with people she cared for. But Tess had her reasons, and she really was genuinely worried about Valeera’s coping, or lack-there-of. </p>
<p>“A week or something?” Valeera asked quietly, and Tess realized she sounded almost relieved. Like she'd wanted this before now, but especially now. “I can...I dunno, pick up some things from the apartment after the service? Stay with you until things are back to normal with the bar?”</p>
<p>“A week or something sounds just fine,” Tess agreed, feeling more than a little relieved that Valeera had finally agreed.</p>
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</div>“What are you doing?”<p>Jaina glanced at Arthas in the bathroom mirror as she put the finishing touches on her makeup. Muted and understated. </p>
<p>She couldn’t remember the last time she’d gotten ready for a funeral. </p>
<p>Well. </p>
<p>That might not have been entirely true. </p>
<p>Maybe she just wasn’t in the mood to think about Derek, right now. </p>
<p>“Going to a funeral,” Jaina responded simply. </p>
<p>“You didn’t tell me about it,” Arthas responded as he leaned against the bathroom wall and crossed his arms across his chest. </p>
<p>“I don’t need you there,” Jaina said with a shrug as she put the cap back on her mascara and tossed it onto the counter before slipping past him through the bathroom door. </p>
<p>He sighed heavily as he followed her out and watched her pull her black pea coat on over her shoulders. </p>
<p>“So, who died?” Arthas asked. “Client?” </p>
<p>“Yes, actually,” Jaina said, throwing the strap of her purse over her shoulder and pulling her keys out of it without looking at him. “A client from the shelter. You wouldn’t want to go, anyway. Might be homeless people there for all you know.” </p>
<p>Arthas was seething as Jaina headed for the door. He was angry enough that Jaina felt the hairs raise along her arms as she glanced in his direction just before she shut the door behind herself. </p>
<p>She drove in silence. Contemplative silence. Arthas had been so different lately. So cold. Not that she minded. It was just that...well. It scared her. It had her sleeping even less than she usually did. </p>
<p>But she couldn’t think about that, right now. She was far too busy worrying over Sylvanas. Wanting to be there for her. Wishing she could be there for her more. </p>
<p>Hating herself for not being able to, maybe. </p>
<p>But the drive was short, and she was there soon enough. In the little alley behind the bar where Sylvanas was standing out in the cold waiting for her almost forlornly. At least until she saw Jaina’s car. Jaina let out a breath when Sylvanas’s ears perked up just a bit and she beelined for the heated seats and warm leather that were waiting for her. </p>
<p>But mostly for Jaina, who reached out for her as soon as the passenger door shut, and wrapped a hand around her wrist firmly. </p>
<p>“Hey, you,” Jaina said softly as her brow furrowed at the dark circles underneath Sylvanas’s eyes. Despite those, though, she looked at least marginally better than she had the last time Jaina had seen her. </p>
<p>“Hey,” Sylvanas breathed, slipping her arm down so that she could twine her fingers with Jaina’s tightly. “You didn’t have to come.” </p>
<p>“I did,” Jaina stated simply, leaving no room for argument. “How are you feeling today?” </p>
<p>“Like I hate funerals,” Sylvanas responded with a breathy, uneasy laugh, and Jaina offered her a weak smile in return. </p>
<p>“I hate them, too, sweetheart. Come here, please,” Jaina’s voice was so soft and coaxing that Sylvanas didn’t hesitate to look into her searching eyes. Nor did she hesitate to lean slowly over the center console for Jaina to pull her into her arms. </p>
<p>“I love you,” Jaina whispered into Sylvanas’s hair as she stroked along her back. “So much.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas murmured a similar response into Jaina’s shoulder and pulled back at the same time Jaina did. </p>
<p>“You look really good,” Jaina said as she stroked along the dark leather coat Sylvanas was wearing and then lifted her hand to cradle her cheek. “You’re okay.” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Sylvanas agreed because she meant it. “Yeah, I’m okay.” It’d taken a couple of sleepless nights. It’d taken a few good cries and some days curled up in bed between Elly being found and today, but she was finally making it. In no small part due to Valeera and Jaina.</p>
<p>Maybe entirely due to Valeera and Jaina. </p>
<p>“We should get going,” Jaina finally said, albeit reluctantly, and Sylvanas buckled her seatbelt as Jaina put the car in reverse and headed away from the bar and towards the town’s only funeral home. </p>
<p>They were about ten minutes into their drive when Jaina reached up to adjust her rearview mirror and glanced in it long enough to get Sylvanas’s attention. </p>
<p>“What is it, baby?” Sylvanas’s hand around Jaina’s squeezed a little tighter following her question. </p>
<p>“I dunno. That car’s been behind us for like four intersections and two turns since I started paying attention to it and I don’t recognize it from the shelter or anything. And it isn’t Tess’s.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas turned her head long enough to look at it through the back windshield of Jaina’s car. Just long enough for it to turn off behind them onto a side-street, and away. </p>
<p>Jaina sighed at her own paranoia. “Sorry. I’m just a little on edge lately.” </p>
<p>“Understandable,” Sylvanas murmured reassuringly as she settled back down in her seat and stroked across Jaina’s knuckles with her thumb. </p>
<p>The rest of the drive was uneventful. Hell, the funeral itself was uneventful. Just like any other funeral, except...well, not. Because Jaina wasn’t here due to some professional obligation. She was here for Sylvanas and for the girl she’d had so much hope for. </p>
<p>And between them on the pew, hidden well enough - Jaina twined her fingers with Sylvanas’s tightly when she realized Sylvanas’s knee was bouncing, albeit subtly. When she glanced over to check on her silently, Sylvanas offered her a very faint smile of reassurance. </p>
<p>It was clear, though, that the contact was something Sylvanas needed right now, so Jaina didn’t stop holding her hand. Wouldn’t have stopped for anything, really. Even as the service went on. The girl had been Catholic, apparently, so it was a rather prolonged ordeal. </p>
<p>That didn’t really matter, though. Jaina was just glad she was getting the service she deserved. </p>
<p>Valeera and Tess were sharing a pew with them. They were able to be a little more obvious about the support they showed each other, and as her mind raced despite the slow drawl of what was actually happening, Jaina couldn’t help but be envious of the way Tess’s arm rested so openly around Valeera’s shoulders. </p>
<p>She hadn’t even realized Sylvanas caught her looking until Sylvanas gave her hand a squeeze and caught her gaze. </p>
<p>It was Jaina’s turn, then, to offer a reassuring smile. </p>
<p>It seemed like forever, and not long at all before they were back in Jaina’s car on their way to the burial site. Before they were under a tent that protected them, mostly, from the light smattering of snow hitting the ground. </p>
<p>At least it wasn’t sticking. Jaina wasn’t sure she felt like driving through snow to get Sylvanas back home today. She’d always found funerals exhausting, stressful ordeals. </p>
<p>Or maybe it had only been since Derek’s that she’d felt that way. Either way, she was more than a little relieved when they were finally back in her car with the heat ramping up and the seats warming beneath them. Mostly, she was relieved to be alone with Sylvanas, again. </p>
<p>She hadn’t even realized how long it had been since either of them spoke when Sylvanas finally broke the silence that had fallen over them since the service. </p>
<p>“Jaina?” </p>
<p>Jaina blinked and looked over at Sylvanas, and her brows furrowed when Sylvanas reached out and ran the gloved tips of her fingers down her cheek. </p>
<p>“You’re crying,” Sylvanas observed softly, settling her hand against the side of Jaina’s neck and tracing the line of her jaw with her thumb. </p>
<p>“I hadn’t realized,” Jaina explained dismissively, swallowing past the lump in her throat and shaking her head. “Are you okay?”</p>
<p>“I’m fine,” Sylvanas said as she shifted as close to Jaina as the center console of the car would allow. “More worried about you right now than anything.” </p>
<p>“You shouldn’t be,” Jaina countered with a sigh and a shrug. “I should get you home. You should see how red your ears are.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas let it go for now, but only because that seemed to be what Jaina wanted. She wasn’t quite ready to let go, however. That much was obvious when she guided Jaina closer to herself and leaned into her for a hug that Jaina gladly provided. </p>
<p>“Do you have to leave when you drop me off, or…?” </p>
<p>“I can stay,” Jaina offered in a mumble against the crook of Sylvanas’s neck. “I really want to stay. If that’s okay.” </p>
<p>“Definitely okay,” Sylvanas murmured, and her eyelids fluttered shut as Jaina’s lips found the side of her neck in a gentle, lingering kiss. </p>
<p>“What is it about funerals that make you want to feel something?” Jaina asked just beneath Sylvanas’s jaw, seemingly unwilling to pull back just yet. Not that it mattered. They’d parked at the street. No one was watching them.</p>
<p>They were sure no one was watching them. </p>
<p>“They make you want to feel alive, I think,” Sylvanas murmured as she tilted her head in response to Jaina’s wandering mouth. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Jaina whispered against Sylvanas’s ear. </p>
<p>“Don’t be,” Sylvanas responded without hesitation. “I very much want to feel alive, right now.” </p>
<p>Jaina finally pulled back, then, but only long enough to claim Sylvanas’s lips in an almost hesitant kiss. Sylvanas’s immediate response made her feel a little bolder. Or maybe a little desperate. </p>
<p>Still, after a moment or two, Jaina breathlessly reminded them both that they should go. That they shouldn’t do this here. </p>
<p>Sylvanas wasn’t quite as worried as Jaina. The windows were darkly tinted, after all. And what the tint didn’t hide - the darkening night outside would. </p>
<p>She was sure of it. </p>
<p>When Jaina finally put the car in drive, she couldn’t seem to get her hand off the shifter and onto Sylvanas’s thigh quickly enough. She paid little attention to the black SUV they passed on their way onto the main road as the man inside packed his camera away quickly and waited just long enough to start his car to avoid suspicion. </p>
<p>He’d slipped a little earlier. </p>
<p>That much, he’d known when he’d seen a shape lean over and look back at his car through Jaina’s back windshield. </p>
<p>There would be more photos that night. </p>
<p>Photos of Jaina’s car outside the bar. Photos of Jaina’s hand pressed against the small of Sylvanas’s back. Of Sylvanas leaning close to her as they passed through the door. </p>
<p>None of them were quite as damning as those of the two of them locked in a heated, desperate kiss - albeit a blurry one. They’d been taken from a distance, after all. And the light hadn’t been ideal.</p>
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</div>Sylvanas let out a contented sigh as she sank down onto the bed beneath Jaina. Jaina, whose skin was warm against her own and whose hands were soft and gentle as they ran along the lengths of her thighs.<p>She didn’t even remember getting undressed. She scarcely remembered making it to the bed. All she wanted was this moment. This moment of Jaina sinking between her legs and leaving kisses across her hips - lower and lower until Sylvanas was moaning her appreciation when Jaina’s mouth finally found her center. </p>
<p>Slowly, Jaina worked Sylvanas up. With languid, patient sucking and lapping of her tongue. She didn’t want to rush this. She wanted this moment, too. She wanted to be present. Fully here. Where she was loved and safe and wanted instead of simply possessed. </p>
<p>Nothing reminded her of that fact like Sylvanas’s hands sifting through her hair and her thumbs tracing over her ears. Nothing made her more sure than the soft, breathless whispers of her name when they fell like prayers from Sylvanas’s lips. </p>
<p>Sylvanas wasn’t in a hurry, either. She was more than a little appreciative of Jaina’s slow pace. Of the prolonging of all of this. The suspension of the reality that awaited them both. </p>
<p>Her orgasm was inevitable, however. And it came upon her just as slowly and languidly as all the moments before until her hips were arching from the bed and Jaina’s arms were wrapping around her thighs to keep her close. </p>
<p>Even as Sylvanas was still coming down - chest heaving and her thighs trembling - Jaina seemed inclined to keep going. </p>
<p>She was surprised when Sylvanas stopped her with a strong tug to one of her arms, but she allowed Sylvanas to turn her onto her back and accepted that Sylvanas didn’t care that her mouth was still a mess when she kissed her. </p>
<p>Truth be told, Sylvanas enjoyed it. Tasting herself on Jaina’s lips as she spread her legs and sank two of her fingers into her. Tasting herself on Jaina’s tongue as Jaina gasped sharply and wrapped her legs around her waist. </p>
<p>Sylvanas wasn’t quite as slow-going as Jaina was. She wasn’t frantic by any means. Her movements were hard and firm and controlled - her breathing heavy against Jaina’s neck in between the kisses and bites she delivered there. </p>
<p>Jaina came quick and hard in contrast to Sylvanas’s earlier orgasm. She clung to her with her nails in her back - leaving marks Sylvanas longed to leave in return. </p>
<p>She accepted them, though. She cherished them. She looked forward to the way they would sting in the shower once Jaina was gone and she was alone. </p>
<p>Yet, even as these thoughts darkened her mood - Jaina was laying against her side stroking across her chest and kissing her cheek. Pulling her back from the edge she’d been teetering on so often over the past days. </p>
<p>“I’m having him served next week,” Jaina whispered, and Sylvanas’s brow furrowed in shock and confusion. </p>
<p>“You’re what?” </p>
<p>“I’m having him served. The divorce papers. I spoke with Lor’themar yesterday. Everything is in order and I just wanted you to know,” Jaina wasn’t looking at her when Sylvanas glanced over. She was looking at the invisible lines she was tracing across Sylvanas’s skin. </p>
<p>“Are you...are you okay?” Sylvanas asked, lifting a hand to brush some of Jaina’s hair away from her face. </p>
<p>She sounded so unsure that Jaina couldn’t help but look at her. “Of course, I am,” She murmured in response, propping herself up on her elbow so she could look down at Sylvanas. </p>
<p>“If you’re having second thoughts...if this changes anything-” It was Jaina’s turn to sound unsure. </p>
<p>“I’m not,” Sylvanas responded firmly. Almost desperately. “I just don’t want you to be having second thoughts, either.”</p>
<p>“Oh,” Jaina relaxed visibly. “No, no. No, I could never regret this. Even if it had nothing to do with you - I could never regret this. It was an inevitability. I think it just...happened a lot sooner for my having met you. Who knows how many years of my life I might have the chance to actually be happy because of you.” </p>
<p>“Will you spend them with me?” Sylvanas asked suddenly, and Jaina was struck by the intensity of her gaze. </p>
<p>“That’s the idea,” Jaina offered with a faint smile. “I hope you’ll have me.” </p>
<p>“I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything,” Sylvanas responded easily. “The only thing I want more than you is for you to be happy. I hope that’s with me. I really, really hope that it’s with me.” </p>
<p>“We’ll make it work,” Jaina said, sounding at least mostly sure of that as she reluctantly sat up in bed and began moving towards the edge of it, no doubt heading for the clothes she’d left across the room. </p>
<p>Sylvanas sat up quickly and reached out to rest her hand against Jaina’s shoulder, giving it enough of a squeeze that Jaina turned to look at her. </p>
<p>“We will,” Sylvanas said as soon as Jaina’s eyes met her own. “I’ll do everything I can.” </p>
<p>Jaina sighed quietly, then, and leaned in to give Sylvanas a kiss that was too quick to turn into something more. “It’s a two-way street,” Jaina reminded her. “But I’ll do everything I can, too. I love you.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas nodded her understanding and murmured a soft ‘I love you’ in return against Jaina’s lips before Jaina slipped away and Sylvanas settled down in bed to watch her get dressed. </p>
<p>As Jaina stood near the front windows of the upper floor to button her shirt, her eyes wandered along the street below.</p>
<p>They lingered on a black SUV parked about half a block down the way, and her hands faltered on the last button. </p>
<p>“Everything okay?” Sylvanas asked from the bed as she drew the covers around herself more tightly. </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Jaina said quickly as she finished dressing herself and grabbed her coat on her way to the door. “Yeah, everything’s fine. I’ll call as soon as I can.”  </p>
<p>Sylvanas lay there for a while after Jaina left before finally slipping out of bed and shuffling towards the little heater nearby so she could carry it into the bathroom with her. </p>
<p>It’d only been a few minutes, and she already needed the sting of scalding water against her skin. Against the faint red welts Jaina had left across her shoulder blades. That, at least, she could process. That, at least, was safe.</p>
<p>It seemed overwhelming to think about what Jaina had told her. </p>
<p>It seemed like too much to hope that this could all be real.</p>
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<a name="section0018"><h2>18. My Hero</h2></a>
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    <i>Don't the best of them bleed it out</i>
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    <i>Use that evidence, race it around</i>
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</div>Tandred’s brow furrowed as he looked down at the screen of his phone to find his mother’s number ringing him. He’d only just gotten in from his last tour that morning, and a mix of jetlag and...not really wanting to speak to his mother had him hesitating to answer.<p>Yet, he felt that nagging sense of guilt he always felt when he thought about not answering his mother’s calls, so he slid his thumb across the screen to accept it and lifted it to his ear as he stared at his sparse hotel room. </p>
<p>“Hey, Mom.” </p>
<p>“Tandred! I trust your flight went well?” Katherine sounded so forced that it actually had him worried. Not that forced pleasantries hadn’t been somewhat normal in his family over the past few years, it was just that this seemed <i>particularly</i> forced. </p>
<p>“It was fine, Mom. I’m going to be in town tomorrow, y’know. I was just about to hit the hay.” </p>
<p>“I know, darling, I know. I’m only calling because I was hoping you might pay your sister a visit tomorrow. Since you’ll be in town, anyway. What is it, two months?” Katherine was sounding less forced, now, and more frantic. Tandred was sure she thought she was hiding it well. </p>
<p>“I always visit Jaina,” He responded in an even tone. “Is there any particular reason I need to visit her immediately?” </p>
<p>Katherine went silent for a while. Tandred wondered what she was thinking about. It could’ve been any number of things, really. Usually, it was just Derek. That realization had Tandred leaning forward in his chair as a chill ran up his spine. “Is Jaina okay?” </p>
<p>“She’s...I’m sure she’s fine,” Katherine began, sounding as though there was a ‘but’ missing from the end of that statement. “It’s just the last time I spoke to her I’m not entirely sure I handled it well.” </p>
<p>“What’d you do, Mom?” Tandred asked as he stood from his chair. The prospect that something might be going on with Jaina was too much to just sit there. At least pacing was doing something. But then, he usually was pretty high-strung when he first got back from overseas. All the years he’d been doing it hadn’t changed that a bit. </p>
<p>“Well, she’s having some...marital problems. I think she was trying to…” Katherine sighed heavily. A deep, shuddering sigh full of guilt and fear that had Tandred clenching his jaw. “I think she wants to leave her husband, and I told her it would make more sense to work things out.” </p>
<p>It was Tandred’s turn to be silent. He needed a moment to make sure he wasn’t about to say something he’d wind up regretting. </p>
<p>“So, the same deal as Derek, really,” He didn’t sound like he was trying to make it into an accusation. That didn’t change the fact that it was. “Same reason I joined the Navy. Because it was either white picket fence with every degree imaginable or something else to give you something to talk to your friends about over brunch, right? And now it’s Jaina? Not that it wasn’t always Jaina. I mean, let’s not kid ourselves here, Mom. She has the degrees, the fence, the husband from a good family. She’s pretty much everything Derek couldn’t handle being, right?” </p>
<p>“Tandred, don’t you dare…” Katherine cut herself and ground her teeth for a moment to regain her composure. “If you think for a moment that I want the same fate for Jaina, you’re sorely mistaken. Or I wouldn’t have called you.” </p>
<p>“He’s a sack of shit, Mom,” Tandred spat into the phone as he ran a hand over his beard and tugged at it. His nerves were getting the better of him. “You can see it in her eyes. Or do you not even bother to look? Look, it doesn’t matter. I’ll be at her place tomorrow and make sure we don’t lose her, too. When did this phonecall happen, by the way?” </p>
<p>Katherine cleared her throat like that was a question she didn’t feel up to answering. And it wasn’t, really. She hated to feel ashamed. She hated to feel chastised. And she felt both those things in spades, right then. </p>
<p>“A few weeks ago,” She finally said quietly. </p>
<p>“Right,” Tandred breathed. “You know how fucked up she must’ve been to call you, Mom?” </p>
<p>Katherine swallowed so hard, then, that Tandred heard it on the other end of the line. </p>
<p>“I know,” Her voice was subdued and she very much sounded her age right then. “I know that I’ve messed things up terribly since your father’s passing. And I apologize for that. But please, recognize that I know I didn’t do my best. Help me fix it. I can’t lose her, Tandred. I can’t.” </p>
<p>Tandred felt a little of the anger he’d been battling against bleed out of him as he heaved a heavy sigh and plopped down on the edge of his too-stiff hotel room mattress. “Yeah. Yeah, I can’t, either. I really, really can’t. I’ll go see her tomorrow. I might get a place there for a while if things are bad. I’m not going to let anything happen to her.” </p>
<p>“Thank you, Tandred. I’m...I’m sorry.” </p>
<p>Tandred faltered for a moment. He wasn’t used to apologies from his mother. He was used to her brushing things under the rug and voiding them at all costs. Not that he could really blame her. He always tried to remind himself just how much she’d been through. Just how much weight she carried on her shoulders. </p>
<p>“It’s okay, Mom. I’ll take care of her.” <br/>Tandred disconnected the call and moved around the room to pack a bag he’d only just begun unpacking. He needed to find an earlier flight, sleep be damned.</p>
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</div>Jaina’s fingertips were trembling against the warmth of her coffee mug as Arthas moved around in the kitchen behind her. Her eyes were burning. Her throat was aching. Her tongue felt thick and useless in her mouth.<p>“So what’d you wanna talk about?” Arthas asked, and it wasn’t his voice that was deafening to Jaina. It was the clinking of his spoon against the ceramic of his mug while he stirred creamer into his coffee behind her. </p>
<p>The little ‘ting’s caused her eyelids to flutter as he came closer, prompting Jaina to draw her hand away from her mug and into her lap beneath the table. She didn’t want him to know she was terrified. The thought of him knowing was repulsive to her. </p>
<p>“You should sit down,” Jaina responded quietly, clearing her throat in an attempt to get her voice to continue cooperating with her. </p>
<p>Arthas pulled out his chair and moved to do as Jaina asked, and the dark blue of his eyes peered across the table at her in a way that made Jaina want to squirm. She didn’t, though. She sat there with her shoulders squared and her jaw set. </p>
<p>“I’m sitting.” </p>
<p>“I see that,” Jaina began with a faint nod. “Arthas...this isn’t going to work, anymore. This marriage. Us. I don’t want to keep trying to force it. I also don’t want to blindside you. I recognize that you’ve given me just as much of your life as I’ve given you, and...and I just wanted to tell you. You’re going to be s-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Served? Yeah,” Arthas sounded so calm. So matter-of-fact. “I saw the decree. You don’t have to keep going, don’t worry. I just want to know the name of the bitch you’ve been fucking.” </p>
<p>Jaina’s entire world got small, then. This table and the space between them became the single pinpoint of existence and consumed every ounce of her awareness. </p>
<p>“What are you talking about?” Jaina asked evenly, tilting her head slightly as she willed the heat rising in her chest not to become visible. Not to betray her. </p>
<p>“I’m not stupid, Jaina,” Arthas responded with a shrug. “Did you really think I was going to grant you an uncontested divorce? While you were stupid enough to fuck around behind my back? You must’ve forgotten other people in this world exist, Jaina. Ones that’ll follow your piece of shit wife around while she’s having an affair. Ones with a great eye for camera angles. Don’t look so surprised, dear. I can make it go away.” </p>
<p>Arthas smiled, then. He actually smiled. He reached across the table in a way that suggested he wanted to take Jaina’s hand, but she didn’t make a move to put them back on top of the table. She was frozen. </p>
<p>Arthas heaved a sigh and leaned back in his chair as he shook his head. “Jaina, Jaina, Jaina...I promise it’s gonna be okay. Just delete the decree. Tell whatever piece of shit attorney you hired the divorce is off.” </p>
<p>“Or what?” Jaina asked breathlessly. </p>
<p>“Or I’m going to ruin your life, Jaina. And I’ll ruin hers, too.” </p>
<p>Arthas’s eyes looked so dark. Jaina couldn’t tell if this was real, or if her mind was playing tricks on her. </p>
<p>“You wouldn’t,” Jaina muttered low enough that the trembling in her voice wasn’t too noticeable. “Don’t you dare.” </p>
<p>Arthas chuckled quietly and rolled his eyes as he stood from the table and left his mug where it’d been sitting. “I’m not gonna let you do what you’re trying to do. Think what you want.” </p>
<p>Jaina’s eyes followed him closely as he walked around the table, and she leaned away from him instinctively when he got close. She didn’t get far enough in time to stop him from leaning in to wrap an arm around her and press his lips to the top of her head. He didn’t kiss her, though. He just spoke in a low, even tone against her hair. </p>
<p>“I”m going out. And you’re going to be here when I get back. Right?” </p>
<p>Jaina reached up between them and pressed her hand hard against Arthas’s chest as she moved away from him. The movement was so sudden the chair toppled as she got her footing a few feet from him. </p>
<p>Arthas lifted one of his eyebrows and held his hands up. “Your choice, J. You know your options.” </p>
<p>“Fuck you,” Jaina whispered breathlessly as she ran a hand through her own hair as though that would somehow wash away the feeling of his closeness. Just before he turned to leave, Jaina took a step after him. “I’ll be here, Arthas.” </p>
<p>Her tone was rushed and a little panicked. </p>
<p>“I know you will,” Arthas responded simply as he made his way towards the door, grabbing his coat on his way out. </p>
<p>Jaina was still standing there long after she heard his car start in the garage. She should’ve called Lor’themar. She should’ve been on the phone with him immediately. </p>
<p>Yet, as she stumbled towards the bedroom for her phone - all she could think about was Sylvanas. All she could do was dial her number and lift the phone to her ear as she covered her own mouth hard with her hand.</p>
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</div>Sylvanas narrowed her eyes as she held her blinds open a crack and looked out at the SUV parked across the street from the bar for what felt like the dozenth time that morning. Every time she looked, she felt the hairs along her arms rise up. She felt her heart beat a little harder in her chest.<p>She knew it was the same SUV she’d seen following them on the way to the funeral. She knew it wasn’t just paranoia talking. </p>
<p>And she nearly jumped out of her skin when her phone rang. The blinds snapped back into place when she saw Jaina’s name on her screen. She wasn’t used to her calling in the mornings. A text here and there, maybe. But a call?</p>
<p>“Hello?” Sylvanas’s voice was quiet. A little unsure, maybe. The sight of the SUV was still fresh in her mind. </p>
<p>Yet, when she heard Jaina’s trembling breaths on the other end of the line - she suddenly found herself hyperfocused on anything but. </p>
<p>“Jaina? Baby, are you okay?” She walked away from the window then and towards her keys. She wasn’t really thinking. It just felt like the thing to do. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No,” Jaina whimpered as the tears that’d been burning her eyes finally began falling down her cheeks. “No, but it doesn’t matter. I...he knows. He knows.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas nearly dropped her keys as she approached the door leading downstairs and stumbled to a stop. “Are you...Jaina, did he do something to you? Are you safe?” </p>
<p>“This isn’t about me, it’s about you,” Jaina tried her best to sound okay. She really did. And she knew damn well she was failing miserably. </p>
<p>“Tell me what to do,” Sylvanas’s voice was urgent and quiet. Her skin was crawling. She was terrified, suddenly. Just not for herself. </p>
<p>“I just wanted you to know, that’s all,” Jaina breathed as she reigned herself in for Sylvanas’s sake more than her own. “I wanted you to know why I won’t be calling for a while, and that I think it’s best if we lay low. I can’t stand the thought of anything happening to you. And before you think the worst - no. I don’t want to end this. You’re all I have. But if you feel differently…”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t,” Sylvanas responded urgently as she held onto the doorknob so hard it creaked in the strength of her grip. A moment later, her head was thudding against the door and her body was sagging against it. “I don’t, baby, God - I never will. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. If I’d just-” </p>
<p>“It’s not your fault,” Jaina said quickly. “He’s had someone following me. I should’ve been more careful. I should’ve never put you in the position you’re in. I promise I’m going to figure this out, I just...fuck. I just need time.” </p>
<p>When Jaina trailed off, an uncomfortable silence came over the call. A silence that was only broken by the sound of Sylvanas slowly turning and sliding down the door until she was seated on the floor in front of it with her legs against her chest. </p>
<p>“I’m going to miss you,” Sylvanas whispered into the line, fearing if she spoke any louder she might regret it. “Please don’t worry about me. I can take care of myself. If you need anything just...I don’t know. Let Valeera know?” </p>
<p>“I will,” Jaina reassured her. “It’s no forever. I just need to call Lor’themar. I just need to figure this out.” </p>
<p>“Don’t do anything you don’t want to do on my account,” Sylvanas pleaded quietly, even if everything in her was screaming at her not to offer Jaina an easy out. All the selfish parts of her. The disparate parts of her. </p>
<p>“I’m never going to do anything I don’t want to do again, Syl. But that has nothing to do with you. And I very much have every intention of being with you on the other side of this. I should go.” </p>
<p>“Okay,” Sylvanas whispered as a shuddering sigh of relief left her. “Okay, I love you. So fucking much.” </p>
<p>“I love you, too. More than you know.” </p>
<p>Jaina forced herself to hang up quickly after that. And just in time, too. She felt her hackles rise in response to the sound of someone walking along the front porch. </p>
<p>She wasn’t entirely sure she was feeling stable enough for Arthas to be back so soon. The knock on the door that followed the footsteps was both a relief and a curse. </p>
<p>She opened the doorbell app on her phone and looked down at it, expecting the HOA or something to be looking back at her. </p>
<p>But that scruffy bearded face didn’t belong to anyone on the HOA. </p>
<p>She nearly threw her phone in her rush to get to the door and open it, and a moment later - Tandred was catching her in his arms as she flung herself at him and buried her face in his chest. </p>
<p>He’d always been so strong. So solid.</p>
<p>That certainly wasn’t any different now, as he held her tightly. </p>
<p>“I missed you, too,” Tandred greeted with a chuckle as he waddled her inside past the threshold and shut the door behind himself. His smile faded into a frown when Jaina only held on tighter as he began to let go. </p>
<p>So he didn’t let go, of course. He lifted a hand to the back of her head and cradled it as he stood there against her and looked around, expecting to see Arthas. </p>
<p>“What’s up, sis? Where’s the, uh...where’s Arthas?” </p>
<p>“I need to tell you something,” Jaina responded quietly, finally pulling back away from him and reaching up quickly to wipe her tear-streaked face only for Tandred to go about it just a little more quickly and do it for her. </p>
<p>“Tell me,” Tandred offered as she finally lifted her gaze and looked at him. At his short-shorn hair and the redness of his beard and the broadness of his shoulders. She reached up and touched his dog tags where they hung against his sweater for a moment before dropping her hand away and taking a deep breath. </p>
<p>“We should sit down, first.”</p>
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</div>Tandred flicked at the label of the beer Jaina had given him when she finally went quiet. He’d lost count of how many times she’d had to stop. How many times her emotions had gotten the better of her. More times than he’d ever seen it happen in his life, probably.<p>He’d never wanted to do something horrible to someone in his life. Had he? Sure. He guessed it was in the job description. Seals tended to have to do questionable things now and again. But he’d never <i>wanted</i> to. </p>
<p>Right now, though? Oh, the things he wanted to do to Arthas Menethil were unspeakable. </p>
<p>Yet, he didn’t give voice to any of that. To the dark places his thoughts had drifted over the past half hour or so. </p>
<p>“Well, I’m glad you finally have someone who appreciates you,” He finally said after Jaina had waited far too long for any possible judgment or disappointment. “I hope I get to meet her soon.” </p>
<p>“What?” Jaina asked in breathless disbelief as her brows furrowed deeply and her tear-reddened eyes widened. </p>
<p>“What’d you think I was going to say, Jaina? I want you to be happy. I know you’ve been...well. Miserable with him for a long time. Anyway, I’ve gotta be honest with you, here. There’s no way I’ll feel right about you staying with him. I’ve got a place lined up. I’ll be around for a few months, this time. Just pack a bag real quick and we can go. Get a room for the night. I’ll go see the apartment tomorrow. You know they’ll give it to me easy.” </p>
<p>“I can’t just…<i>do</i> that, Tan,” Jaina responded with a sigh as he looked away. “I have to talk to the attorney. Tell him what Arthas knows. See where to go from here. There’s a million repercussions to every move I make, now.” </p>
<p>Tandred was quiet for a while as he steepled his fingers. Long enough for Jaina to look across the table at the split, calloused skin of his hands. </p>
<p>“Right,” Tandred responded with a nod. “Then I’m staying here until you <i>can</i> just do that. If he wants to keep up appearances so bad, he won’t have a problem with me being here.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jaina found that logic impossible to argue with. Tandred had stayed here on multiple occasions. There’d been times he’d spent his entire leave in the attached guest suite. </p>
<p>“I...I don’t think that’s a great idea,” Jaina forced herself to counter quietly, and Tandred shrugged. </p>
<p>“I promise I won’t kill him in his sleep, Jaina,” He said as he reached across the table and covered one of Jaina’s hands with his own. “Unless you want me to.” </p>
<p>Jaina couldn’t tell if he was serious. She decided not to ask. </p>
<p>“I’ve never been scared of him, Tan. He’s just so different, now. Honestly, I don’t care if something happens to me. I only care about her. I guess I’ve reached that point.” </p>
<p>Tandred shook his head and held onto Jaina’s hand a little tighter. “No. No, you haven’t. Don’t say that. We’ll get through this together, yeah? That’s what I’m here for.” </p>
<p>Jaina gave him a weak smile and slowly looked down at his hand over hers. “I didn’t think you were coming for another week or so, honestly.”</p>
<p>“Mom called,” Tandred responded as he turned his hand over so Jaina could touch his palm. She used to do it when they were young. She’d gotten her hands on a book about palm reading once, and Tandred would never forget how she used to tell him his future. Then again, Jaina’d always been like that when she’d gotten her hands on something. She was so all or nothing. Until Arthas. Until this marriage. </p>
<p>Well. Maybe that wasn’t true. Maybe this was just another thing she’d had trouble letting go of. </p>
<p>But Jaina smiled soft and slow as she ran her fingertips along his life line. </p>
<p>“What’d she say?” Jaina asked quietly as she paused over one of the chapped cracks in his rough skin. </p>
<p>“She’s worried about you. Said she didn’t do so hot when you called her last.” </p>
<p>Jaina laughed. A little breathy sound through her nose. “Has she ever done well?” </p>
<p>Tandred chuckled and looked up at Jaina with a glint in his eyes. “She used to. You remember that, though.” </p>
<p>“Mm, yeah. I remember.” </p>
<p>Before their dad. Before Derek. </p>
<p>Katherine had been a good mom. She really had. She’d always done her best, at least.</p>
<p>“You aren’t going to lose me, Tan. You don’t need to babysit me,” Jaina’s voice was a whisper as she folded Tandred’s fingers over themselves and then wrapped his hand with her own. </p>
<p>“You were always the strong one,” Tandred responded quietly. “But he was strong, too. This isn’t babysitting. This is my being here for you because he’d be here, too, if he could. You, uh...you scared me when you stopped responding to my letters.” </p>
<p>“I didn’t know what to say when you kept asking how I was,” Jaina explained as a guilty look passed across her features. “It’s hard to explain in a letter. And if I’d told you even half of it you’d have gone AWOL or something. I hate to worry you when you’re deployed. You have plenty to be concerned about without me adding anything to it.” </p>
<p>“You’re more important to me than anything,” Tandred countered quickly. “It kills me to know you’ve been suffering like this. I’m pissed at myself for not seeing how bad it really was.” </p>
<p>“Alright,” Jaina responded with a weak nod. In reality, she was relieved. Relieved that he’d pushed past her half-hearted rejection of his help. Of his soothing, protective presence. “You can stay. I’m sure he’ll think he just forgot the date you’d be coming. And then I’m sure he’ll pretend he didn’t.” </p>
<p>“I really hate that guy,” Tandred responded dryly as he sighed and leaned back in his chair to take a sip of his beer. “I meant it when I said no man was ever going to be good enough for my big sister.” </p>
<p>Jaina laughed. A real laugh, albeit a tired one. “You said that when we were kids, Tan. You can’t still mean it, now.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Apparently I do, considering you have a girlfriend,” Tandred said with a teasing scrunch of his nose. </p>
<p>“God, don’t call her that. I’m still married, Tan. Please try to remember that I’m still married.” </p>
<p>“Trust me, I have no intention of doing anything that wouldn’t make the situation better for you. And I meant it when I said I can’t wait to meet her.” </p>
<p>Jaina nodded. “She means a lot to me, Tan. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t fuck up.”  </p>
<p>“Everybody fucks up,” Tandred responded dismissively as though she’d gotten a speeding ticket or run a red light. “But honestly, Jaina, aside from the timing and legality of it - you didn’t. And you can’t blame yourself. You didn’t know he was the type of person who’d hire somebody to tail you. You couldn’t have known.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s just it,” Jaina responded as she looked away and sighed. “I swear he’s not...well. Smart enough for that.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Daddy, then,” Tandred said with a sigh without really even having to think about it. “And I’d bet anything he’d be pretty pissed right about now if he knew Arthas blew his master plan wide open.” </p>
<p>That hadn’t even dawned on her yet, really. The thought that Terenas could’ve done this to her. Somehow, it hurt even more. </p>
<p>Maybe Tandred saw that in the way her face fell, because he stood and moved towards her to give her a strong hug a moment later. </p>
<p>“Call that attorney of yours and I’ll find something to fix for dinner. I’m assuming you have food in that big fancy fridge, right? Don’t want Arthas to come home without dinner waiting for him.” </p>
<p>Jaina patted his side and then ruffled his beard as she slowly stood up. “Don’t poison it. You should trim this, you know. You’re a mess.” </p>
<p>“Finally important enough to have a beard and you want to strip the privilege from me?” Tandred asked with a little smirk, and Jaina shoved him gently towards the kitchen. </p>
<p>“Go, then.”</p>
<p>He pulled his phone out of his pocket and held it up for Jaina, then. The push hadn’t really moved him much at all despite the fact that he’d purposely tried to let it. </p>
<p>“Call your girl after,” He explained simply as she looked questioningly at his phone. “You can use my phone whenever you need to.” </p>
<p>As it turned out, there simply wasn’t time. She’d only just gotten off the phone with Lor’themar in her office when she heard Tandred’s deep, boisterous voice from the living room followed by Arthas scrambling to save face in response to his brother-in-law’s hearty greeting. A greeting that involved a handshake and a grip of Arthas’s arm that he’d never have admitted to being hard enough to hurt. </p>
<p>Dinner was filled with Tandred talking as it usually was when he visited. Jaina had always loved that about him, and always marveled at it. He’d never, ever been much of a talker. Only around Arthas. Only for Jaina’s sake. He was also more than well-equipped to drink Arthas under the table. </p>
<p>Yet another of his traits Jaina was endlessly thankful for tonight when Arthas finally admitted defeat while Jaina was still slowly making her way around the kitchen. She’d been pretending to clean for at least an hour now, while Arthas’s speech got more and more slurred and Tandred’s hadn’t. </p>
<p>Jaina sagged against the counter in relief when Arthas stumbled towards the bedroom alone without even looking back at her, and Tandred sighed heavily when he heard the door shut. </p>
<p>Jaina glanced over at her younger brother to find him already looking at her. He’d just spent the entire evening listening to Arthas attempt to brag about absolutely nothing in response to Tandred’s own genuinely impressive life updates. Promotions. Medals. </p>
<p>Tandred wasn’t much of a braggart, either. At least with anyone aside from Arthas. Jaina found it amusing, really. The would-be battle for superiority kept Arthas too distracted to realize Tandred was actively trying to have him wind up with enough alcohol in his body that he’d be dead to the world until morning. And it had also kept his attention off of Jaina. </p>
<p>Jaina, who was walking slowly into the dining room from the kitchen as he kept right on smiling at her. Steady as a rock. </p>
<p>“Thank you, Tan,” She said quietly as he nodded. </p>
<p>“Any time, Sis,” </p>
<p>She’d been just about to ask, but the request fell silent on her lips as he held out his phone again. </p>
<p>“Here you go,” He said quietly as she took it from him. “Tell her I said hi.” </p>
<p>Jaina nodded and stood there for a while longer before she finally walked across the house to the side porch - leaving Tandred between herself and Arthas, which - incidentally - was right where he wanted to be. At all times, if at all possible. </p>
<p>It took a few rings for Sylvanas to answer. Enough rings, in fact, that she began to worry that she might not pick up at all. She was shocked by the voice that greeted her. </p>
<p>“Look, I’m havin’ a real fuckin’ bad day, so you can shove your extended car warranty up your ass and-”</p>
<p>“I didn’t know you were into anal, actually. We should probably discuss it first, yeah?” Jaina’s voice was both gently chiding and amused, and Sylvanas stammered in response for a moment before she recovered. </p>
<p>“I’m! Jaina, fuck! I’m so sorry. Fuck, I’m so sorry. The number is out of state and I just thought...how. Wait. How are you calling me? Did you get a burner?” </p>
<p>Sylvanas’s voice was rough. So much so that Jaina felt a heaviness fall over her when she realized Sylvanas had likely been crying. </p>
<p>“It’s my brother’s phone. He’s here at the house. I told him what’s going on and he basically refused to leave,” Jaina sighed and plopped down on one of the wicker armchairs as she looked out at the glow of the heated pool in the back yard. </p>
<p>“He’s in the army, right? I thought he was overseas or something?” Sylvanas sounded confused, and rightfully so. Jaina didn’t do much talking about her family. </p>
<p>“Navy,” Jaina corrected simply.</p>
<p>Sylvanas was silent for a while as she processed everything Jaina had said before she finally managed to form a coherent sentence, again. </p>
<p>“So you’re okay? You’re going to be okay? You sounded so scared earlier, Jaina, I...fuck. I was terrified. I almost went over there so many times.” </p>
<p>“I’m gonna be fine, sweetheart, I promise. And I’ll be in touch with you as much as I can from this number. I talked to Lor’themar. He said he’s going to do some digging and get in touch with me tomorrow or the next day. I’m just...I’m sorry I can’t tell you when you’ll see me, again. I really am.” </p>
<p>“Don’t be sorry,” Sylvanas murmured gently. “I’ve only been worried about you. I swear if he does something to you-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He won’t. I promise. And I think he knows Tandred would drop him like a fly.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas let out a breath that sounded like one she’d been holding for years, and Jaina had to bite back another apology. </p>
<p>“Jaina I didn’t tell you something earlier that I probably should have. I was, uh...well. That call earlier was a lot.” </p>
<p>“So tell me, now,” Jaina coaxed quietly - more quietly, even, than she’d already been. </p>
<p>“That SUV from the day of the funeral was outside this morning when you called. It left a few hours ago, but...I don’t know. It was there when I woke up, even.” </p>
<p>Jaina clenched her jaw hard, then, and cleared her throat when she felt bile rising in it. The anger was almost overwhelming. </p>
<p>“I’ll make sure they leave you alone, Syl. I promise,” Jaina wasn’t entirely confident in that, and she hated it. So much. </p>
<p>“I can handle it. I can handle all of this a lot better now that I know you’re alright.” </p>
<p>“I know you don’t want me to apologize, but I really am sorry. Please just let me talk. Please.”</p>
<p>“I am, Jaina. I’m listening.” </p>
<p>“Okay,” Jaina took a deep breath. “Okay, well. I swear I’m going to do everything I can. I swear I’m trying. And I swear to fuck I’m gonna do everything in my power to make this up to you. To be good for you when it’s all over.” </p>
<p>“Baby, you’re gonna be the best. We’re gonna be good. We’re gonna be so good, I know we are. This is all just temporary. Just a blip.”</p>
<p>“You sound so sure,” Jaina observed as she clutched the phone a little closer. As though that would somehow bring Sylvanas closer, too. </p>
<p>“I have to be sure,” Sylvanas said simply. “I’ve never needed anything the way I need you. You’re like...you’re like my second chance. How often do those come along?” </p>
<p>Jaina swallowed thickly just before she made a noise that sounded like a mix between a quiet laugh and a sob. </p>
<p>“...Baby? Are you okay?”</p>
<p>“I’m fine, Syl. I just...you’re mine, too. My second chance. I should go.” </p>
<p>“I’ll let you go, then. Jaina, I love you. I’m here. That’s not changing.” </p>
<p>“I love you, too.” </p>
<p>Jaina didn’t hang up right away. She couldn’t. </p>
<p>Neither did Sylvanas. </p>
<p>Jaina was so lost in the moment she didn’t even hear Tandred coming until the screen door was opening. She was so used to hiding she nearly threw the phone <i>at</i> him in response to his sudden presence on the porch.</p>
<p>But it wasn’t Arthas. It was her brother. Smiling apologetically with his big goofy grin and scruffy beard. </p>
<p>“Sorry,” He said. “Didn’t mean to scare you. Your future ex-husband is in the bathroom puking and I figured ‘Normal Jaina’ would probably go check on him. You know. For the sake of appearances.” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Jaina said quickly, standing and lowering the phone from her ear. </p>
<p>“Did you tell your girl I said hi?” Tandred asked, and Jaina lifted the phone back to her ear. </p>
<p>“My brother says hi.” </p>
<p>She felt an almost physical shift, then, as Tandred grinned at the sight. As someone - a real, actual human being that she loved and cared about witnessed her speaking with Sylvanas like this. It felt so good. It felt so fucking right. </p>
<p>She could hear the uncontrollable smile in Sylvanas’s voice when Sylvanas responded. </p>
<p>“Tell him I said hi back.” </p>
<p>“I will.” </p>
<p>“I really like being ‘your girl’,” Sylvanas was whispering, now, as though that was some sort of cherished secret. Maybe it was. At least for now. The secret part, anyway. </p>
<p>“Me, too. Good night.” </p>
<p>“Night.” </p>
<p>Jaina finally disconnected the call then and handed the phone back to Tandred, and the prospect of getting Arthas cleaned up and back to bed suddenly seemed a lot less daunting than it had every other time before. </p>
<p>It all seemed less daunting, really.</p>
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<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Off To The Races</h2></a>
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    <i>Because I'm crazy, baby</i><br/>
<i>I need you to come here and save me</i><br/>
<i>I'm your little scarlet starlet</i><br/>
<i>Singing in the garden</i><br/>
<i>Kiss me on my open mouth</i>
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</div>Valeera sighed quietly as she threw away the last empty beer bottle she’d found on Sylvanas’s coffee table and sat down on the edge of the couch she was half-asleep on.<p>“You gotta get it together, Syl,” Valeera murmured quietly as she reached out to stroke through Sylvanas’s hair. “I hate seeing you like this.”</p>
<p>“I’m fine,” Sylvanas said quietly, slowly rolling onto her side away from Valeera so that her back was to the younger woman. “I’ll get over it.” </p>
<p>“It’s...it could be worse,” Valeera offered half-heartedly as she stubbornly continued running her hand through her friend’s hair. “Right?”</p>
<p>“It could,” Sylvanas agreed. “But it could be better, too. I worry about her constantly. I haven’t seen her in two weeks. It’s been almost as long since we spoke.” </p>
<p>“That’s rough,” Valeera agreed, and Sylvanas heaved a heavy sigh. “Do you want me to stay the night?” </p>
<p>“No,” Sylvanas sighed and turned onto her back so she could look up at Valeera. Valeera was fairly certain Sylvanas had been wearing the same plaid shirt for two days now, but she could’ve been wrong. Sylvanas had quite the collection of plaid, after all, and she didn’t smell. Not yet, anyway. “You have plans with Tess.” </p>
<p>“I always have plans with Tess,” Valeera quipped as she cradled Sylvanas’s cheek in her hand and looked at her for a beat or two. “But you’re my best friend, and you’re sad as fuck.” </p>
<p>“I’m just moping,” Sylvanas countered. “I just miss her. I don’t want both of us to be lonely together. I’d feel better knowing you were enjoying your weekend.”</p>
<p>“How can I enjoy my weekend while I’m worrying over you?” Valeera asked, her brows furrowing and her head tilting in an almost accusatory way. </p>
<p>“You’ll enjoy it by not worrying over me,” Sylvanas offered, as though that was the simplest, most obvious solution possible. “I’m a grown woman, Valeera. I can have a few beers after work without you pulling your hair out over it.” </p>
<p>As stinging as those words should’ve been, Valeera couldn’t take offense to them. She could see how hard Sylvanas was trying. And all of it for her, most likely. So she wouldn’t hang around and devote the entirety of her weekend to lifting Sylvanas’s spirits. </p>
<p>“Alright,” Valeera finally relented with a sigh. “I’m gonna call and order some delivery for you, though, and you have to send me a selfie of you eating it.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas rolled her eyes immediately and gave Valeera a gentle shove to get her on her feet, but Valeera just stood there next to the sofa with her arms crossed - clearly waiting for something. </p>
<p>“Alright, Jesus. I’ll send you a selfie of me eating, weirdo,” </p>
<p>Valeera smiled as though she’d won a battle that would go down in the history books and promptly took out her phone to dial the Chinese place Sylvanas loved. The one with food that was both artery-clogging and perfect all at once. </p>
<p>Sylvanas watched her go, and her smile slowly faded in response to the sound of Valeera’s retreating footsteps until she was gone, entirely. She looked at her phone for what felt like the dozenth time that day, and reminded herself that Jaina was dealing with an awful lot, right now. And that she was okay.</p>
<p>Sylvanas didn’t know Jaina’s brother, but she had to believe nothing would happen because if she didn’t, she might lose it. </p>
<p>As though the SUV that had been coming less frequently lately wasn’t already doing a great job of that. </p>
<p>Fuck. At least she had food coming. She hadn’t been eating nearly enough lately, and even in her sour mood, Sylvanas had to admit to herself that she was fucking starving.</p>
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</div>Valeera smiled faintly at Tess across the center console after she shut her door, and Tess returned that smile easily as she reached out to tuck some stray locks of Valeera’s hair behind her ear. “Hello, love. Out to eat, or eating in, tonight?”<p>“In,” Valeera responded simply as she ignored the incessant tug of her seatbelt and angled herself so that she was leaning against Tess’s shoulder. “I just wanna be alone with you, tonight.” </p>
<p>“You can be alone with me,” Tess responded without hesitation, somehow managing to shift the car into gear and pull away from the front of the bar without jostling Valeera too much. It was almost as though she was used to driving with Valeera semi-attached to her by now. </p>
<p>“Will you just go through a drive-through?” Valeera asked at the next red light. </p>
<p>“Of course,” Tess said as she moved one of her hands from the gear shift where it'd been resting to stroke along Valeera’s thigh. “Are you alright?”</p>
<p>“Mm, I've been better,” Valeera responded, as vague and dismissive as she usually was. </p>
<p>“Talk to me about it?” Tess asked as the light turned green and they were off, again. </p>
<p>“When we get home?” Valeera asked, much to Tess's surprise. For more than one reason. But if Tess was curious about whether or not Valeera had meant to call it home, she didn't let on. Valeera hadn't shown any signs of wanting to head back to her apartment. In fact, Tess had noticed a few more things lingering in her bedroom and bathroom than usual.</p>
<p>“That sounds just fine,” Tess said with a soft smile, and then Valeera was leaning into her again, and sighing.</p>
<p>“I like you a lot,” Tess murmured as Valeera touched along her side with the back of her hand. “Did you know?”</p>
<p>“I could've guessed, yeah,” Valeera responded, taking it in stride. </p>
<p>The rest of the ride wasn't all that eventful. Valeera leaned over her to order her burrito, and then she held their dinner in her lap while Tess got them home. </p>
<p>And it was nice to be there. Valeera felt comfortable there, finally, among Tess’s nice furniture. The polished hardwood floors felt familiar under her feet after she made her way to the bedroom and changed out of her work clothes while Tess got their dinner laid out on the coffee table.</p>
<p>Tess had discovered Valeera didn't much like eating in the dining room. That she much preferred eating in front of the television in the comfort of her pajamas with her thigh pressed to Tess’s and her legs folded on the sofa. </p>
<p>Tess didn't mind at all. She'd have done a lot more and a lot worse to guarantee Valeera’s comfort than simply turning dinner into a less formal event.</p>
<p>“I'm worried about Sylvanas,” Valeera said suddenly over the soft drone of the TV while she looked down at the half-finished burrito in her hands. “Long story short, there was some dick bag following them. Her and Jaina, I mean. Got a few good pictures, I guess, because Jaina’s husband basically threatened to ruin her if she didn't call off the divorce. She's not going to, of course, but the guys been around the bar a few more times and Sylvanas is worried about Jaina. Honestly, I think she's scared Jaina might decide to take the path of least resistance. I know I would be.”</p>
<p>“Do you think that's a real option for Jaina?” Tess asked, her own dinner all but forgotten on the table in front of her.</p>
<p>Valeera sighed and shook her head without really having to think too hard about her answer. “Not really. I think she's ready to admit defeat about that marriage. I also think she fell really hard for Syl. Unfortunately none of that helps right now, and none of that is gonna make this any easier.”</p>
<p>“So...Jaina is willing to risk so much to get out, even with the affair coming to light?” </p>
<p>Valeera nodded. “Believe it or not, I think she is.”</p>
<p>“Well, the solution is rather simple, honestly,” Tess responded, and Valeera’s eyes narrowed as she looked over at Tess in confusion.</p>
<p>“Simple? How is any of this simple?”</p>
<p>“He wouldn't dare not grant her the divorce if he had an affair, also,” Tess leaned back into the couch cushions then and Valeera kept right on looking at her, clearly waiting for further explanation. </p>
<p>“Okay…? Well if he were having one, too, I'm sure Jaina would know.”</p>
<p>“Right. And he doesn't know me. Has no idea I have any stake in this. Valeera, nobody in this town knows me. You can't tell me you don't realize how easy it would be for me to waltz into the country club or wherever it is he spends his time and manipulate this entire situation without anyone knowing.”</p>
<p>Valeera fell silent then. It was most definitely a stunned silence, judging by the look on her face.</p>
<p>“Are...are you trying to tell me that the solution is for you to sleep with Jaina’s shitty husband?” </p>
<p>Tess outright cackled in response to that, and Valeera huffed in response.</p>
<p>“Of course, not. I don't need to sleep with him, love. I can make it look far worse than whatever it is that he has on Jaina, however. I can guarantee that.” </p>
<p>Valeera hadn't ever seen Tess in this light. She could never have even entertained the idea that this was something Tess was capable of, much less coming up with so effortlessly.</p>
<p>“None of them could know, of course,” Tess continued with a slight wave of her hand. “Only you and I. I'll get everything I need to make it appear as bad as it needs to appear, and I'll get it to the right person. Men are simple. Easy. I hate to see you upset, Valeera. And I know that woman means the world to you. There isn't a lot I wouldn't do for you, in case you didn't know.” </p>
<p>Valeera took a moment to process all of this. A moment that she spent looking closely at Tess. At the openness of her expression and the searching look in her eyes. She had no doubt Tess had meant every word. Just like she had no doubt, suddenly, that she could pull it off.</p>
<p>“You're going to leave me…” Tess murmured after a while, only half-joking.</p>
<p>“No,” Valeera responded quickly. “This is a very, um...attractively morally grey side of you that I'm just now getting acquainted with. That's all.”</p>
<p>“Let me take care of it,” Tess urged as she reached out to brush her fingertips over Valeera’s hand. “You're too pretty to be so worried all the time.”</p>
<p>“You're ridiculous,” Valeera accused, still utterly enthralled. </p>
<p>“I think you like it,” Tess countered easily.</p>
<p>“Tess?” Valeera has turned her hand over and twined her fingers with hers as she spoke her name.</p>
<p>“Hm?”</p>
<p>“Top me,” Valeera responded quietly, but it was the expression on her face that had Tess barely holding back laughter. So earnestly full of desire and mischief all at once.</p>
<p>“Top you?” Tess asked with a furrow between her brows and a tilt of her head. “Physically? As in assume the dominant role in a sexual situation?” </p>
<p>All while Tess teased her, Valeera was moving to straddle Tess’s lap. She'd only just finished speaking when Valeera settled down over her lap and rested her arms over her shoulders.</p>
<p>“Yes,” Valeera responded, her lips almost touching Tess’s. “As in I want your lipstick all over my tits and I want you to have to get me a glass of water afterward because I won't be able to use my legs.” </p>
<p>“That's a lot more specific,” Tess murmured as she tilted her head only to find Valeera compensating so that a kiss was still just out of reach. </p>
<p>“Take me to bed,” Valeera said as Tess huffed quietly in response to being denied. “I owe you an orgasm before any of that happens for being so sexy.” </p>
<p>Tess made an amused noise, but Valeera was serious. </p>
<p>And it wasn't just the accent. It was the sultry darkness of her eyes and the raven-black hair and the steadiness of her. The stability of her. All the things that Valeera could no longer even imagine walking away from. </p>
<p>“You don't owe me anything,” Tess responded as her hands slipped down Valeera’s back to grip her ass. “But I would very much like a kiss.” </p>
<p>Valeera finally gave in when Tess stood with her still in her arms, and she made it a point to make it as difficult as possible for Tess to walk her towards the bedroom. Another thing Tess was used to. She didn’t even trip on anything this time. </p>
<p>But she did toss Valeera onto the bed in a rather nonchalant manner - something Valeera seemed to find endlessly amusing. </p>
<p>“Thank you,” Tess murmured with a half-smirk playing at her lips as she tugged her own shirt over her head and tossed it aside before moving onto the bed over Valeera, who immediately reached around her to unfasten her bra. </p>
<p>“For what?” Valeera asked against Tess’s jaw after nibbling at it gently while she slid the garment off Tess’s arms. </p>
<p>“The kiss,” Tess said with a soft chuckle. “For being here.” </p>
<p>“You’re awfully sentimental for someone who is about to rail her girlfriend,” Valeera teased as Tess’s hands made quick work of her own clothes. </p>
<p>“My girlfriend?” Tess asked over the sound of Valeera’s jeans hitting the floor beside the bed. </p>
<p>“Guess so…” Valeera breathed, far too distracted by Tess’s teeth grazing the skin of her breast just beneath her nipple to put up any resistance to the terminology she’d suddenly decided to adopt. </p>
<p>Tess hummed her appreciation as she moved her attention lower - leaving increasingly hungry kisses in her wake until she was finally moving her lips over Valeera’s underwear and then down her inner thighs as she hooked her fingers in their waistband to pull them down along the way. </p>
<p>“Rough?” Tess asked against the crook of Valeera’s thigh. </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Valeera husked breathlessly, reaching down to tangle her fingers in Tess’s strong, silky hair. </p>
<p>“All right, love. Rough it is.” </p>
<p>Valeera let out a shuddering breath as Tess began making good on her promise with the tantalizing stretch of two fingers sliding into her all at once. A blissful sting that was softened by the equally sudden presence of the warmth of Tess’s tongue against her clit. </p>
<p>But that wasn’t what Valeera wanted. Yeah, Tess was amazing with her mouth. But when she was in this type of mood, well…</p>
<p>Tess groaned under her breath when Valeera tugged sharply at her hair to pull her up - and she recovered as quickly as she could manage, despite the fact that she’d lost her balance a bit on her way up Valeera’s body. </p>
<p>“Easy, Love,” Tess whispered against her cheek as she used her own thighs to spread Valeera’s further as she began teasing at adding a third finger when Valeera’s hips shifted down against her hand. </p>
<p>“No,” Valeera argued, pressing a teasing smirk against the corner of Tess’s jaw before she kissed it. “Hard, remember?” </p>
<p>“Mm, that’s right,” Tess husked low and smooth as she lifted her head to look down into the soft green glow of Valeera’s half-lidded eyes. “I remember, now.” </p>
<p>“Stop teasing me,” Valeera demanded, holding Tess’s gaze without wavering and lifting her thighs higher against her sides before slowly lowering the smooth silk of them back down. </p>
<p>Tess kept right on looking as she added a third finger. She savored the furrow between Valeera’s brow and the part of her lips and every soft, breathy noise that left them until she finally had to lower her head when it became too difficult to both hold herself up and keep working her hips and her hand in response to Valeera’s increasingly desperate movements. </p>
<p>It was rare for Valeera to tap out before Tess. Extremely so. Tonight, though, Tess seemed to be in a mood. </p>
<p>Valeera was still leaning over her thigh, glistening lips parted so she could catch her breath when Tess began sitting up and reaching for her. </p>
<p>Valeera shook her head and reached out to press a hand against Tess’s chest and laughed as she rubbed her own face against the blankets to clean it. “Mm-mm. I’m good.” </p>
<p>“Are you sure?” Tess asked as she collapsed back down into the pillows, sounding a little out of breath, herself. </p>
<p>“Mm, yeah. You wore me out,” Valeera breathed and moved herself until she could rest her cheek against Tess’s stomach. “G’night.” </p>
<p>“Your water,” Tess complained quietly, and Valeera shrugged. </p>
<p>“M’fine,” Valeera murmured, moving further up Tess’s body so that she could curl against her side. </p>
<p>Tess sighed in defeat and pulled the covers around them as best she could considering the tangled mess they were in. </p>
<p>Another night, then. Another night of Valeera staying and not addressing it. Another night Tess got to enjoy the warmth of her almost too-warm body pressed along her own in an almost cat-like manner. </p>
<p>Tess wondered idly as she lay there with one of her hands against the small of Valeera’s back if she knew she snored. If she knew it was soft and precious and that Tess didn’t mind at all. She didn’t let herself get too lost in anything deeper than that as sleep began to cloud her own thoughts, as well. She didn’t let herself wonder if Valeera loved her or if this was only temporary. She’d taught herself long ago to enjoy things while she could. To savor and cherish them. </p>
<p>And that, at least, was very easy with Valeera.</p>
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</div>Tess found the din of the clubhouse pleasant as she sat in her corner booth alone. Soothing.<p>Almost as soothing as the Vieux Carre she’d been sipping. It was only her first one. She needed to be sharp. A necessity that became all the more pressing when she finally noticed the man she’d been inspecting on various social media platforms over the past few days walk in and take a seat a couple of tables over. </p>
<p>He was with a few younger men. Men who had glanced in her direction and offered her a smile a time or two. One that she didn’t return. </p>
<p>At least not until they began talking amongst themselves and Arthas finally glanced in her direction. Then, she smiled. A slow, ruby-red painted smile that matched the red of her cocktail dress and the smoldering look in her eyes. </p>
<p>He looked away quickly, but he looked at her again many times over after that. He kept right on looking until the men he was with found other things that interested them. </p>
<p>That was when Tess pretended she found other things equally as interesting. That was when Arthas finally came over and gestured towards her mostly empty glass. </p>
<p>“What are you drinking?” He asked, in a low, silky voice that Tess hated. </p>
<p>“This? This is a Vieux Carre. But you can tell the barman I’ll have another drink and he’ll know what to make. If you were offering, that is.” </p>
<p>“Well...yeah. I was.” Arthas responded, and Tess smiled at him as he turned to go do just that. </p>
<p>She wondered if this was a game he played often. </p>
<p>She decided it likely was when he introduced himself with his full name. First and last.</p>
<p>“How nice to meet you, Mr. Arthas Menethil. I’m Emma.” </p>
<p>He didn’t seem too concerned about the lack of last name as he slid to sit beside her in the booth beside her. What he was concerned about was talking. And Tess was shocked at just how much talking this man could do. </p>
<p>Entirely about himself. </p>
<p>She smiled and nodded just as any interested woman would. She sipped at her second drink while he had a third and a fourth and so on. Until she finally glanced down at her phone on the table and feigned a surprised gasp at the time. </p>
<p>“It’s nearly midnight,” Tess announced as she reached into her clutch and pulled out a pen. </p>
<p>Quickly, she scribbled a number onto the nearest napkin and left it where it lay as she gathered her things and began sliding her coat on, only for Arthas to scramble to help her with it. </p>
<p>“Do give me a call, Mr. Menethil,” Tess said with a smile. A warm smile. A dangerous one. </p>
<p>“I’m...uh…” </p>
<p>Tess’s smile faded and a furrow formed between her brows as she feigned concern. “Is something the matter? I thought we were enjoying each other’s company...”</p>
<p>“No, no! Everything’s just fine,” Arthas reassured with a quick, compensating smile. “It’s just it might be easier for me to text you.” </p>
<p>Tess slipped back into that easy, sure smile she’d been wearing for most of the night and drew her coat closer around herself. “Well, then that would be wonderful. I look forward to hearing from you.” </p>
<p>“Can I walk you to your car?” Arthas asked, glancing around the room quickly to see who was still lingering. It really was late for a Tuesday night. At the clubhouse, anyway. </p>
<p>“I’m just fine, Mr. Menethil. But it’s kind of you to offer.” </p>
<p>“Arthas,” He corrected with a slight lift of his hand. “You can call me Arthas.” </p>
<p>“Aright, then,” Tess responded. “I’ll talk to you soon, Arthas?” </p>
<p>“Definitely.”</p>
<p>“Wonderful.”</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
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</div>Valeera leaned over and opened the passenger door just in time for Tess to reach it. She’d just gotten Tess’s text not even five minutes earlier, and luckily - she’d just gotten back from her second trip to the bar on the lookout for any possible errant private investigators.<p>Being in Tess’s car was good for things like that. But it was also good for making it look like Tess had a driver. Which all fit into Tess’s would-be story quite nicely. </p>
<p>“You look super hot,” Valeera complimented as Tess sighed and buckled her seatbelt. </p>
<p>“I’m super exhausted,” Tess corrected as she reached for Valeera’s hand to give it a quick squeeze. “I hated that.” </p>
<p>“Didn’t go well?” Valeera asked, turning out of the parking lot in a direction that would take them a rather round-about way back to Tess’s house. </p>
<p>“I think it went well enough. We’ll see,” Tess said as she dug a second cell phone out of the clutch she’d been carrying with her and glanced down at the screen. </p>
<p>“Sneaky,” Valeera said, and it sounded more like a compliment than an accusation. “Give him your number?”</p>
<p>“Mhm. Well. The number to this phone, anyway.” </p>
<p>“God, I like you a lot,” Valeera mused to herself. “Like, a lot.” </p>
<p>Tess breathed through her nose and shook her head as she looked down at her lap. </p>
<p>“Clearly I like you, too,” Tess remarked and lifted a brow as the phone she was holding vibrated in her hand. </p>
<p>“Is that…?” </p>
<p>Tess brushed her thumb across a text alert from an unfamiliar number. </p>
<p>
  <i>Just making sure you didn’t give me a fake number :).</i>
</p>
<p>“It certainly is,” Tess murmured. “Didn’t expect this so soon.” </p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>I would never. I’m terribly tired, unfortunately. But please do feel free to get in touch with me tomorrow evening once I’ve had some rest. Arthur, was it?</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Arthas. Arthas Menethil.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <b>Right, right. I’ll be sure to remember next time. A good cocktail usually does go to my head rather quickly.</b>
  </i>
</p>
<p>Tess locked the screen of her phone and slid it back into her clutch then looked over at Valeera, who kept glancing at her expectantly. </p>
<p>“This might actually work,” Tess finally said. “I’ll let you take a look when we get home.” </p>
<p>“You should let me take that dress off of you, too. It’s got me feeling real, um…”</p>
<p>“Toppy?” Tess suggested as she crossed her legs, exposing one of her calves directly in Valeera’s line of sight. </p>
<p>It was so obvious and crass, and Valeera laughed in response. </p>
<p>“Yeah,” She agreed. “Toppy.”</p>
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<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Nobody</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
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<i>I'd be appalled if I saw you ever try to be a saint</i></p>
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<i>I wouldn't fall for someone I thought couldn't misbehave</i></p>
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<i>But I want you to know that I've had no love like your love</i></p>
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<i>From nobody</i></p>
</div>Jaina felt almost nervous as she dialed Sylvanas’s number and lifted the phone to her ear. She most definitely felt fully nervous when it began ringing.<p>It’d been hell without her. Just over three weeks of Arthas gradually growing less willing to have Tandred stick around. And then finally, an ultimatum much less severe than his last came on the eve of him going out of town for a two-day conference. </p>
<p>Tandred had to be gone by the time he got back. No mentioned consequences. No threats. </p>
<p>Yet, it hadn’t bothered her. She was ready. </p>
<p>That was the biggest catalyst for this call, really. Well. That and the fact that she missed Sylvanas like she would miss air if she were plunged underwater. </p>
<p>“Hello?” </p>
<p>Sylvanas’s voice was soft. A little scratchy like it always was on Sunday mornings. Jaina wished she could reach through the phone and smooth her hair and her eyebrows for her. She wished she could kiss the sleep from her eyes and lay in her arms while she grumbled about how early it was. </p>
<p>“Sweetheart...I’m sorry I woke you,” Jaina’s voice was soft and gentle, but it wasn’t the whisper Sylvanas had heard on the few phone calls they’d shared since everything had happened. </p>
<p>“Don’t be sorry,” Sylvanas husked before clearing her throat and forcing herself to sit up in bed. “Everything okay?” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Jaina responded with a smile. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Arthas is gone for the next two days. Listen, I’m going to can you be here this evening for dinner? I’ll send Tandred to pick you up.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas was smiling, too. Hell, her heart was suddenly threatening to pound out of her chest at the prospect of even having a moment or two with Jaina. Much less dinner. </p>
<p>“Wait. Wait, can I be <i>where</i> this evening for dinner?” Sylvanas asked as she tried to un-muddle her sleep-hazed thoughts. </p>
<p>“My house,” Jaina said as she sat down on the arm of the sofa she’d been pacing near. “I promise it’s safe. I just...I want you to be here tonight. Can you do that for me? If I can promise you that you’ll be safe?” </p>
<p>“Of course, I can,” Sylvanas responded with no hesitation. She trusted Jaina so utterly, and beyond that - Jaina sounded so fucking earnest that it had Sylvanas a little shaken. </p>
<p>“Thank you. I’ll see you tonight. Can you be at the shelter at seven? I’ll have him pick you up there.” </p>
<p>“Yeah, yeah. I can definitely be there. I, uh...what should I wear? Like. Should I dress nice, or...I don’t know. Is this a casual thing? What if he doesn’t like me?” </p>
<p>“Sweetheart, he already likes you,” Jaina cut her off before she could continue to ramble, and Sylvanas trailed off with a sigh. </p>
<p>“Okay. Sorry. It’s just been so long since I’ve seen you, baby. I just...fuck. I’ve been a little fucked up about it.” </p>
<p>“So have I,” Jaina murmured as she pressed the phone harder against her own cheek. “I miss you so much. But I'll see you tonight.”</p>
<p>“It’s so good to hear you say that,” Sylvanas whispered because she was just a tad too choked up to say it any louder. </p>
<p>“It’s really good to say it,” Jaina responded, lingering on the call for a while longer before they exchanged near-simultaneous ‘I love you’s and hung up.  </p>
<p>Tandred wandered into the room smiling a minute or two later. Smiling mostly because Jaina was smiling, and it was just so good to see her smile.</p>
<p>“So, am I picking up my future sister-in-law tonight?” He asked on his way through the living room into the kitchen.</p>
<p>“Tandred, please…”</p>
<p>“Sorry, sorry. Am I picking Sylvanas up tonight?” He corrected himself, still smiling as he rummaged around. “And do you have everything you need for dinner?”</p>
<p>“I do,” Jaina said as she slid backward off the arm of the couch and landed on her back on the cushions. “And yes, you're picking her up.”</p>
<p>“Great. I'm still excited to meet her.” Tandred responded as he approached and offered Jaina a glass of water, sitting down next to her head with his own and looking down at her as she balanced it on her stomach.</p>
<p>“She's nervous,” Jaina warned. “Please behave.”</p>
<p>“Speaks volumes that she cares what I think, Jaina. Of course, I'm gonna behave.”</p>
<p>Truth be told, Tandred was a little nervous, too. Even when he followed the GPS's directions down a side street towards the spot Jaina had designated for him to pick Sylvanas up, he was still nervous. It'd been so long since something had made Jaina happy, and he just wanted to get this right. For Jaina.</p>
<p>And as he slowed to a stop in front of the shelter, he could only guess the small, strikingly attractive woman waiting on the sidewalk was the woman he'd heard so much about.</p>
<p>He put his rental in park and half-jumped out of the driver's side to walk around and meet her. He had his best smile on. At least, he hoped he did as he walked up to her with a hand outstretched. A hand that Sylvanas took easily.</p>
<p>“Tandred, I'm hoping. Or I'm shaking the hand of a complete stranger outside a homeless shelter,” Sylvanas greeted and he nodded as he laughed. </p>
<p>“Yeah. Tandred. And that’d make you Sylvanas, I'm also hoping?”</p>
<p>She released his hand and one of her ears flicked against the cold night air as the smile she’d been wearing relaxed into something more natural. </p>
<p>“It's really good to meet you, Tandred. I'm glad she has you.”</p>
<p>“She's been dealing with my existence for a long time, now. She's not getting out of it any time soon. You look like you're freezing, let's get going?”</p>
<p>The look of relief on Sylvanas’s cold-reddened face said it all, and once he'd opened her door for her he slid back into the driver’s seat and turned the heat up before he ever even touched his seatbelt or the steering wheel.</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s skin felt like it was on fire as they drove. It was weird, wasn't it? Sitting next to the brother of the woman she was in love with who also happened to be married? </p>
<p>“Is that the place?” Tandred asked, pointing at the dark bar he'd driven past earlier. </p>
<p>Sylvanas glanced over at it and then down at her hands in her lap. “Yeah, it's...yeah. It needs some work.”</p>
<p>“It's great,” Tandred countered easily. “I hope I get to have a few drinks there before I have to leave town again.”</p>
<p>“It's a gay bar,” Sylvanas warned with a lift of one of her brows.</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Tandred responded nonchalantly. “All the more reason to go.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas would've been lying if she'd said she wasn't surprised. </p>
<p>“Well, you're more than welcome to come. Drinks would be on me.” </p>
<p>Tandred positively beamed as he signaled for his next turn. “That's the best kind of drink.”</p>
<p>“A free one?” Sylvanas asked slyly.</p>
<p>“Obviously,” Tandred said, but his tone wasn't the least bit condescending. Sylvanas found herself smiling, again. </p>
<p>The longer they drove, the more unfamiliar their surroundings became. But it wasn't until they turned into the country club that Sylvanas shifted almost uncomfortably in her seat.</p>
<p>“This is where Jaina lives?” She asked as she looked around at the too-big houses with their too-green lawns.</p>
<p>“Mm, yeah. Kind of reminds me of where we lived when we were kids. We always hated it, honestly. It's weird to think that Jaina went right back to it. I mean, I get it. Like, she has reasons for everything. Most of them are beyond her control, or at least they have been for a long time.”</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Sylvanas agreed, sounding considerably more subdued than Tandred had heard her sound up to this point. “Yeah, it's really…” Sylvanas cleared her throat as that uncomfortable feeling she'd been trying to keep at bay settled a little deeper in her stomach. </p>
<p>“But hey, it's not forever, right?” Tandred scrambled to fix the awkward mess he seemed to have made of their conversation. “The reasons I mean. God, I'm awful at this and I'm sorry.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas actually laughed at that despite the fact that everything had, in fact, gotten a little awkward. </p>
<p>“No, you're literally the best at this,” Sylvanas lied as she looked over at him to catch him peering at her.</p>
<p>“Thank you for lying to me for the sake of my pride,” he responded as he made a turn into a large circular driveway. “Very nice of you. Anyway, this is your stop. And it was really great to meet you. I mean it.” </p>
<p>“You aren't staying for dinner?” Sylvanas asked with her ears pressed back in confusion.</p>
<p>“No, we’ll have plenty of time later to get to know each other better,” Tandred responder simply as he pressed the button to open the garage door. He closed it again as soon as they were in. “Just looks like I'm coming and going this way, but nobody's been keeping tabs on her today, so…”</p>
<p>Tandred cleared his throat and shrugged as he looked at Sylvanas in the light of the garage and offered her an almost beseeching smile. </p>
<p>“Anyway, I’ll see you soon,” Tandred finished his earlier statement without really finishing it. “But if you don't go in there and see her now I think she might spontaneously combust.” </p>
<p>“Right. Okay. Well, thank you. A lot. And it was really nice meeting you, too,” Sylvanas paused after she unbuckled her seatbelt, and then narrowed her eyes and looked up at Tandred questioningly. “Do we, uh...hug? Are we supposed to hug, now? Or shake hands?”</p>
<p>Tandred was still chuckling as he leaned over and gave Sylvanas a quick hug. “Good to know we're both great at this,” he said as he pulled away again and put the car in reverse. “Please go give my sister some attention, though, before she starts spam calling me.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas suddenly remembered that that was in fact why they were here. Because Jaina was here. Jaina, who she hadn't seen in over three weeks. Jaina, who she missed every second of every day.</p>
<p>Suddenly, she couldn't get out of the car quickly enough. She couldn't make it to the interior door of the garage quick enough, either, and she nearly fell through it before she remembered herself and gathered her thoughts enough that she could knock like a civilized human being. </p>
<p>Sylvanas was a little stunned when Jaina opened the door, but she realized after a beat or two that she wasn't alone in that. </p>
<p>Jaina looked gorgeous standing there staring at her, though. With her hair up in a loose bun and her glasses on and a soft-looking sweater draping over her shoulders loosely, yet in a way that fit her just right. </p>
<p>“Come inside?” It was more of a question than an invitation.</p>
<p>“Right,” Sylvanas said quickly as she stepped up into the door, feeling rather accomplished for not having tripped over the little ledge of the doorway. “Sorry, I just...you look really good.”</p>
<p>Jaina’s face flushed and she shook her head as she reached past Sylvanas to shut the door behind her.</p>
<p>“Come here,” Jaina responded once they were safe inside, wrapping her arms around Sylvanas and breathing in deeply as Sylvanas leaned into her and tucked her face into the crook of Jaina’s neck. </p>
<p>“You look good, too,” Jaina said, finding herself glad Sylvanas had stuck with a flannel shirt beneath her jacket. She'd missed the feeling of it beneath her hands against Sylvanas’s slender back. “God, I fucking missed you.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas nodded but didn't speak, and it was only then that Jaina realized there was dampness against her neck.</p>
<p>“Sweetheart…” Jaina pulled back slowly and slid her hands up Sylvanas’s chest to cradle her face as she looked at her. </p>
<p>“I'm okay,” Sylvanas reassured her quickly, not bothering to reach up to catch her own tears. Jaina had done that for her. “Promise. I smell food, by the way. And it smells amazing.”</p>
<p>Jaina exhaled half in relief, half in amusement. Right. She'd invited Sylvanas over for dinner. A dinner she'd been struggling for a couple of hours now to get just right.</p>
<p>“I don't cook much,” Jaina warned as she took one of Sylvanas’s hands in her own and led her toward the kitchen. “But I wanted to cook for you.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s eyes wandered everywhere. From the impossibly high-vaulted ceiling of the living room and foyer to the spiral staircase with its intricately crafted wrought iron spindles. </p>
<p>“I appreciate it, Jaina. It's gonna be perfect,” Sylvanas said as her eyes settled back on Jaina and then to the kitchen they were headed towards. It looked like something out of a magazine. One of those kitchens with the six-burner stoves and a fridge that looked just like the cabinets around it. </p>
<p>Dinner really did smell good. It looked even better as Jaina led her towards a breakfast nook where a serving dish was waiting. Some sort of roast with potatoes and carrots that looked like they were about to fall apart, which was exactly how Sylvanas liked them. </p>
<p>Her stomach actually growled as she sat at the table at Jaina’s urging and Jaina began making her a plate silently. The roast had even less structural integrity than the vegetables, and it looked twice as moist, and Sylvanas was truly, genuinely impressed.</p>
<p>Just before Jaina sat down, though, Sylvanas reached out and hooked the back of her thigh gently with her hand.</p>
<p>Jaina reached out for her shoulder immediately, stroking over it and kneading into the tense, sinewy muscle there as she looked down at her. </p>
<p>“It looks wonderful,” Sylvanas complimented as she let go of Jaina’s leg to tug gently at her sweater instead. Jaina knee what Sylvanas wanted - maybe because she wanted it twice as much - and just before their lips touched, Sylvanas murmured a quiet ‘thank you’ against them.</p>
<p>Jaina could've had this a million times and never gotten tired of it. The praise. The appreciation. The gentle, lingering kiss that could've easily turned into more yet didn't. </p>
<p>“If you don't stop kissing me like that I'm not even going to let you eat dinner, Sylvanas,” Jaina warned as she trailed her fingertips along the side of Sylvanas’s neck and then rested them along the underside of her jaw as she pulled back.</p>
<p>“It was just a regular kiss, I swear,” Sylvanas countered with the corners of her lips curved up in a soft smile.</p>
<p>Jaina smiled in turn and shook her head. “No. It's never ‘regular’ when you kiss me. It's always the best kiss I've ever had. Every time.”</p>
<p>It was Sylvanas’s turn to blush, then, as Jaina took her seat at the table and turned on some soft music with an app on her phone that seemed to control an unseen stereo and unseen speakers. Just something soft and acoustic that Sylvanas found pleasant as she ate as best she could while most of her attention was focused on Jaina.</p>
<p>Jaina didn't seem to mind, though. In fact every now and then she placed another carrot or two on Sylvanas’s plate. They seemed to be her favorite.</p>
<p>It was all so perfect it almost made Sylvanas sadder than it made her happy. She wanted this so terribly. She ached for it to the core of her being. </p>
<p>“How do you feel about relaxing in the pool with me after dinner?” Jaina sounded far too nonchalant for Sylvanas’s ears-back, brows-raised reaction.</p>
<p>“It's...Jaina it's freezing outside? I don't have a bathing suit? I…I feel terrible about relaxing in the pool, to be honest?”</p>
<p>Jaina laughed quietly as she took in Sylvanas’s expression. It bordered just on the edge of utterly adorable. “The pool is heated, Syl. And there’re gas heaters out there. It's screened in, and warm enough. And you don't need a bathing suit. I won't be wearing one, either.” </p>
<p>“Oh,” Sylvanas said to buy herself time as she looked down at what little was left of her dinner and poked idly at a carrot. “Well. That's...I can do that.”</p>
<p>Jaina chuckled and popped another cubed potato into her mouth, deciding not to bring up just how beet-red Sylvanas’s ears were. She knew Sylvanas was just fine being naked. That was something she'd come to learn over the course of knowing her. Of falling for her.</p>
<p>And that made the blush in her cheeks and ears that much nicer because that blush was for her. That blush was because Sylvanas was thinking about <i>her</i> naked in a pool. It was flattering. Endearing. </p>
<p>Sylvanas finished her dinner first, but Jaina wasn't all that interested in lingering around the table. She almost thought her and Sylvanas were going to have a real fight over the dishes until she finally relented and allowed Sylvanas to load the dishwasher after she rinsed.</p>
<p>This turned into Sylvanas kissing her again, and Jaina having to apologize for leaving soapy handprints on the ass of her jeans - much to Sylvanas’s amusement. It also led to a more subdued, heavy moment as Sylvanas moved them until Jaina’s back met the edge of the counter, and Jaina’s hands found the hem of Sylvanas’s shirt and slid under it. </p>
<p>“We aren't making it to the pool are we?” Jaina asked as Sylvanas cradled the small of her back in one hand while the other rested against the countertop.</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Sylvanas didn't know if she was convincing herself or Jaina, as Jaina’s free hand found the back of her neck to pull her closer.</p>
<p>“I wanted you to see it,” Jaina said, seemingly out of nowhere. “This house. What I'm capable of. What I accomplished.”</p>
<p>“Baby, you're capable of anything. I've never believed in anyone the way I believe in you. But it is a really nice house.” </p>
<p>“No, it's...it's not,” Jaina responded. “Not on the inside. Not in a way that matters.  And I needed one good memory,” Jaina was murmuring all this into what little space was left between them after Sylvanas had rested her forehead against her own and let her eyes fall shut. “I think that's what I need the most. One night that I can look back on once it's all gone that doesn't make me want to die. One night I can recall where this house was as beautiful as it deserved to be.” </p>
<p>“I can give you that,” Sylvanas said quietly and with utter conviction. </p>
<p>Jaina tilted her head up and brushed their lips together in a light kiss. “I know you can.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas pulled away and began unbuttoning her own shirt - sliding it off her shoulders a moment later to leave herself in just her tank top. </p>
<p>“God…” Jaina sighed as she took Sylvanas’s shirt from her and left it on the counter while she let her eyes roam shamelessly. Sylvanas. Hadn't worn a bra. She often didn't. But there was something about this tank top in this light that left nothing to the imagination in the most exquisite way. </p>
<p>“Hmm?” Sylvanas queried as Jaina’s hands went for the buckle of the thick leather belt that held her jeans low on her hips. </p>
<p>“You,” Jaina said, leaving the buckle open to work on the zipper of her jeans as she slowly turned to begin leading them towards the side door that led to the pool. “You belong in a magazine.” </p>
<p>“What kind of magazine?” Sylvanas asked as she caught up with Jaina quickly and wrapped her arms around her middle just as they passed through the door Jaina had been walking her to. “Hm?” </p>
<p>Her voice was a low, soft murmur now against the back of Jaina’s ear and Jaina had to stop to lean back into her just to take it in for a moment. </p>
<p>“Depends on the kind of mood you're in,” Jaina murmured as Sylvanas’s hands slowly slid under the hem of her sweater to touch along her stomach and sides.</p>
<p>“Mm,” Sylvanas mused in a hum against the side of Jaina’s neck. “You belong in a magazine, too,” her voice was a whisper as Jaina stroked along her arms and sighed out her contentment. “Let me see you?”</p>
<p>It was a request, not an order - but without a hint of shyness to it. Confidence, perhaps, that Jaina would indulge her.</p>
<p>“I like this mood,” Jaina breathed as she pulled away and turned to look at Sylvanas. It wasn't <i>warm</i> out here by any means, despite the heaters. In fact it was cool enough that Sylvanas’s tank top was positively lewd, now. But it wasn't freezing, and Sylvanas looked comfortable enough.</p>
<p>Jaina reassured herself of that as she tugged her sweater off over her head and glanced to the side as she dropped it onto a nearby pool chair. Then came her bra. Removed easily and quickly at first. At least until Jaina held it against her breasts as the straps began to fall down her arms. </p>
<p>Sylvanas was watching raptly - torn between looking at Jaina’s body and getting caught in the heat of her usually cool eyes. </p>
<p>Jaina smiled when Sylvanas took a step forward, and she took a step back in turn - discarding her bra as she stepped closer to the pool chair so that she could toss her glasses down atop her sweater. </p>
<p>Sylvanas began to make another move and Jaina lifted a hand to keep her at bay - pausing for a moment before she reached up to pull her hair loose from the tie it was in. </p>
<p>“You asked to see me,” Jaina said. “So watch.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas let out a breath and slid her hands into the pockets of her undone jeans while Jaina reached to guide her leggings down her own legs to leave them in a pool on the stonework beneath her feet. </p>
<p>She was naked when she finally moved towards Sylvanas instead of away, and she brushed their cheeks together as she guided her hands from her pockets to lift them up against her own chest.</p>
<p>“Do you like me?” Jaina asked as Sylvanas cupped her breasts and kneaded them gently while Jaina reached for her jeans to push them down a little lower so she could touch along the skin just above the waistband of her briefs. </p>
<p>“I love you,” Sylvanas responded - her voice just a touch on the husky side, now. “Of course, I like you.”</p>
<p>Her touch was even gentler, now. Just cradling Jaina’s breasts as her thumbs brushed slow circles against her nipples while Jaina teased at her jaw with her lips and her teeth. </p>
<p>“Sometimes I think you're well aware of how perfect you are, and sometimes I'm not sure you have any idea,” Jaina’s voice was as soft as Sylvanas’s had been. Breathier, though, as her skilled hands continued touching. Claiming, really. However slowly. </p>
<p>“Nobody’s perfect,” Sylvanas said as she leaned back just in time for Sylvanas to pull her tank top over her head and off - exposing her broad, slender shoulders and her strong, slender frame. </p>
<p>“You're really, really close,” Jaina countered as she pressed the flat of her palm to the subtle lines of muscle that were particularly defined just beneath Sylvanas's breastbone. </p>
<p>Sylvanas met Jaina’s gaze and Jaina found her eyes just as warm as Sylvanas found hers. Equally full of need and adoration. </p>
<p>Jaina went to work pushing her jeans the rest of the way down next, followed by her briefs. She lingered in her knees long enough that by the time she stood back up, Sylvanas’s breathing was audibly heavy. Yet it caught and stalled in her throat so easily as the warmth of Jaina’s palms covered her breasts and her almost uncomfortably hard nipples. </p>
<p>“Let's get you in the pool,” Jaina urged when Sylvanas began moving back in against her. Jaina wasn't sure right now if she was seeking her warmth or something more. Perhaps a little of both. Jaina wanted to be both. She wanted to be Sylvanas’s warmth, and many other things that she needed. God, being needed by this woman was heady. In all the best ways.</p>
<p>Jaina was first into the water. She slipped into it from the side gracefully and dipped her head under and when she came back up for air she was facing Sylvanas, who had finally moved to sit on the same edge with her legs hanging beneath its steaming surface. </p>
<p>Sylvanas leaned onto one hand as she watched Jaina. As she looked at her features - sharper, now, with her hair water-slicked away from her face. Yet no less beautiful. Maybe more. </p>
<p>“Come here,” Sylvanas murmured as her free hand rested casually in her lap. Everything about her was casual, really. The easy sideways lean of her body. The subtle spread of her legs. If she was steel in all her hardness, Jaina was a magnet. Helpless. Drawn, inevitably, through whatever separated them. Water was nothing. No obstacle, at all - compared to what they'd gone through thus far to have one another. </p>
<p>Jaina moved to her through the water and hooked her arms over the tops of her thighs, and Sylvanas ran her fingertips over her hair - following the steam rising from it as Jaina’s eyelids fluttered. </p>
<p>“Why is this so easy?” Jaina asked as she slowly tilted her head until her cheek rested against Sylvanas’s thigh. </p>
<p>“Because we love each other,” Sylvanas answered simply. “Same reason it's so hard.” </p>
<p>Jaina smiled at the brutal honesty, and Sylvanas moved her hand so she could trace that smile with her thumb. </p>
<p>“I'd do it again,” Sylvanas whispered. “I'd do it forever.”</p>
<p>Jaina’s brow furrowed as Sylvanas stroked the backs of her fingers against her cheek. </p>
<p>“Not forever,” Jaina corrected softly.</p>
<p>“I know, baby, I'm just-”</p>
<p>“I'm leaving,” Jaina’s voice was barely audibly, and when she opened her eyes Sylvanas couldn't read her expression any longer. “Tomorrow night when he gets home, I'm serving him, personally. And then I'm leaving. Tandred found an apartment, and then I decided to sign the lease, instead. A lot of my things are there, already. Tan’s helping me move the rest tomorrow after he gets you home.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas was so still, Jaina began to wonder if time had stopped, entirely. Yet, she couldn't look up. </p>
<p>At least, not until Jaina lifted her arms and slid into the pool herself. And then she found she was wrapped in a hug tighter and safer than anything she could ever have imagined. Sylvanas could've pulled them both under right then, and Jaina wouldn't have cared.</p>
<p>There was nothing between them. Not even water could find purchase as their bodies pressed hard into one another and Sylvanas kept one hand in Jaina’s hair and the other around her back. </p>
<p>For a long time, they stayed like that. Long enough that Jaina finally felt like she might not wither to nothing if she let go of the moment. </p>
<p>“That was a real mood-killer,” Jaina remarked as she rested her forehead against Sylvanas while Sylvanas lifted a dripping hand to join the other in cradling her face. </p>
<p>“Was it?” Sylvanas asked innocently as she watched the way the lights of the pool refracted through all the water above and up against Jaina’s face - dancing in her eyes and capturing Sylvanas utterly. </p>
<p>“I hope not,” Jaina said quietly. Honestly.</p>
<p>“I told you I would give you something to remember,” Sylvanas reassured gently. “I still can. And I'd still like to.” </p>
<p>“I want to build a life like this with you,” Jaina responded. “Only...not like this. I want to give you everything, and I want to love you and to be loved. I wish this could've been us.”</p>
<p>“All I want is you,” Sylvanas said as she lifted Jaina’s legs beneath the water until Jaina was wrapping them around her waist as Sylvanas turned them and leaned her against the edge of the pool. “And if I get to have an entire life with you, I don't care about anything else. I couldn't possibly.”</p>
<p>“You're doing great so far,” Jaina encouraged with a faint smile. “With the memories.”</p>
<p>Jaina squeaked rather embarrassingly when she found herself suddenly lifted from the water until she was having to catch the edge and settle down on it while Sylvanas laughed about both her expression and her teasing. </p>
<p>Sylvanas gave her time to savor the sight of her kissing slowly along her inner thighs, and Jaina stroked appreciatively through her hair all the while - even when Sylvanas finally began urging her legs to part further. The shuddering breath the other woman let out against the crook of her inner thigh was a heady thing. But then, being desired by her was always a heady thing.</p>
<p>“Beautiful…” Jaina whispered as Sylvanas’s lips brushed ever closer to her center and her eyes shut softly. </p>
<p>The word had come out so breathy and low with the faintest hint of tremor it's undertones that Sylvanas found the idea of taking her time next to impossible. Not when Jaina was so close - glistening unabashedly in her readiness. </p>
<p>Sylvanas savored the way Jaina’s breath caught when she stroked her tongue through that wetness slowly. And again. Never lingering too long against her clit, but long enough and with enough pressure that Jaina hissed now and then as her hips shifted with impatience. </p>
<p>“Like that,” Jaina whispered, only half-aware that she'd gathered Sylvanas’s hair into a firm grip against the back of her head. But she couldn't help it. Sylvanas had finally stopped teasing in favor of flicking her tongue slowly over her clit as she panted for breath against her</p>
<p>And then it all stopped so suddenly Jaina whispered in frustration as Sylvanas hooked her legs over her shoulders and drew her closer to the edge of the pool. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Please,” Jaina murmured as her eyes fluttered shut again and she hooked her ankles together against Sylvanas’s back. </p>
<p>“Look at me while I make you come,” Sylvanas responded, clearly having been waiting for Jaina to say something about being made to wait.</p>
<p>Jaina’s eyes opened immediately, and her lips were parted as she looked down between her own legs. Sylvanas held her gaze for just a moment for emphasis in a way that nearly made Jaina’s eyes roll back, yet she managed to stay focused even as Sylvanas went back to work so fervently it was as though she was making up for those precious few lost moments. </p>
<p>Jaina did as she'd been asked, and it was...well. One of the most arousing sights she'd ever seen. The way Sylvanas’s ears were pressed back out of the way. The way her jaw flexed with the quick, focused efforts of her tongue. Mostly, though, it was the furrow of her brow and the rapid, quick puffs of air through her nose and against Jaina’s skin that did her in. That, and the focus and the fervent desire to make Jaina feel good. </p>
<p>And god, did she feel good. Her entire body tensed and shuddered as her thighs held Sylvanas’s head in place until she couldn't take her continued attention any longer.</p>
<p>When Sylvanas didn't stop immediately, she released her hair and pressed her trembling hand gently against her forehead.</p>
<p>“Sw...sweetheart, I...fuck…”</p>
<p>Sylvanas gave Jaina one last, lingering suck against her clit before she finally pulled back to look at her. </p>
<p>“I could do that for hours,” Sylvanas murmured, lowering Jaina’s thighs from her shoulders and helping her slide down into the pool when she seemed inclined to seek out its warmth and the closeness of Sylvanas’s body. </p>
<p>“We’ll work up to it,” Jaina offered, sounding both amused and half out of it. “But it's my turn, right now.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas smiled almost slyly as Jaina began turning them so that Sylvanas’s back was against the pool wall now. </p>
<p>“You just had your turn,” she whispered against Jaina’s ear teasingly.</p>
<p>“You know what I mean,” Jaina countered as Sylvanas looped her arms around her shoulders.</p>
<p>“And if I don't?” Sylvanas asked against Jaina’s ear before she bit the lobe of it gently.</p>
<p>“I mean I want nothing more right now than to hear you gasping in my ear when you come,” Jaina responded without hesitation. </p>
<p>The smile on Sylvanas’s face slipped away both in response to those words and the sensation of Jaina’s hand curling to rest against the hollow of her hip between them. </p>
<p>“You should definitely make me come, then,” Sylvanas whispered, and Jaina braced one arm along the edge of the pool behind her both for leverage and to give Sylvanas somewhere comfortable to lean her head back. No sooner had she done that than she'd found a wetness between Sylvanas’s thighs that was entirely different than the water surrounding them. </p>
<p>Jaina still got a thrill along her spine every time she realized she had this kind of power with Sylvanas. Such a strong, confident woman who had no qualms digging her nails into Jaina’s lower back as she held her close. Who was panting, now, against Jaina’s shoulder as she worked soft, quick circles against her clit with her fingertips. </p>
<p>It wasn't long before Sylvanas was clinging to her as she began to lose purchase on the floor of the pool when her legs rebelled against staying upright. But Jaina was right there - pressing against her harder so she wouldn't slip as her lips parted against Jaina’s shoulder and her fangs grazed the skin there. </p>
<p>That was when Jaina’s free hand found the back of her head and kept her where she was. </p>
<p>“Go ahead,” Jaina whispered breathlessly. “Please, sweetheart.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas had never bitten her. Had never left even the faintest scratch or bruise. Yet, she'd always seemed so inclined to. And Jaina had always been inclined to let her. It was Sylvanas’s willpower alone, really, that'd kept it from happening. </p>
<p>But there wasn't any need for that now. </p>
<p>Even still, Sylvanas hesitated for a breathless moment as she pressed her lips against Jaina’s skin - the delicate spot just in between the slope of the side of her neck and the rise of the top of her shoulder. Jaina was more than a little aware that Sylvanas liked that spot. That she often pressed her face there when she came. That she teased at biting it just as often.</p>
<p>If the last nail in the coffin could somehow feel pleasant, the sudden sting of her fangs followed by the deep, dull ache of Sylvanas sucking at that sting of skin being broken so gently was absolutely the last nail in the coffin. And Jaina moaned low and steady through it all as Sylvanas came, releasing the already bruising skin she’d been working at as a series of breathy, hushed sounds of pleasure and appreciation left her. </p>
<p>They were both using the wall to hold themselves up at first until it occurred to Jaina that it would be much easier to float. That they were, in fact, in her pool. </p>
<p>She almost laughed at herself as she pulled Sylvanas gently away from the wall and turned her so that her back was against her chest.</p>
<p>“Pick up your feet,” she whispered as she nudged the backs of Sylvanas’s ankles gently.</p>
<p>It took Sylvanas a moment to trust they wouldn't just slip under the surface in her current, dazed state. When she did, though, she found that she very much appreciated Jaina holding her while they drifted aimlessly until they wound up close enough to the stairs that Jaina finally pushed them over to sit with Sylvanas winding up in her lap, her arms out over the water and her head leaned all the way back against Jaina’s shoulder. </p>
<p>“You should do that more often,” Jaina murmured as she drew her dripping fingertips along Sylvanas’s arm in lazy, aimless patterns. </p>
<p>“Was it too much?” Sylvanas asked quietly, perfectly content to keep her eyes shut as she enjoyed the utter bliss of the moment they were sharing.</p>
<p>“Mm-mm. I like a little pain, sometimes. A lot.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas let out a breath. A soft, huffy one that had Jaina smiling and turning her head so she could kiss her cheek. </p>
<p>“It's almost over, sweetheart. I swear. And then we can be who we are without worrying who will see what. And I can try to be what you've deserved to have all along,”</p>
<p>Sylvanas’s eyes finally opened then, and she slowly turned until she slid out of Jaina’s lap so she could see her as she lifted her hands from the water and stroked over her slicked-back hair. </p>
<p>“You've always been what I deserve. You aren't your circumstances, and you've shown me a hundred times over that you love me in a hundred different ways. That's all I care about.”</p>
<p>Jaina smiled appreciatively and lifted her own hands to cover Sylvanas’s. “You're so wonderful. But it's okay to care about this. It's okay to want all the things we haven't been able to have. I want them, too.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas sighed and her eyes fell as she moved towards Jaina and settled over her lap in a way that had Jaina leaning back along the stairs as Sylvanas rested one hand along her side and the other over her hair. </p>
<p>“I'm normal,” Sylvanas admitted with a faint little half-smile. “You caught me. I can't stand the thought of him even being in the same room as you. The thought of him touching you is vile. But do you know what the worst part is?”</p>
<p>“Hm?”</p>
<p>“The thought of him saying your name,” Sylvanas said softly. </p>
<p>Maybe that would've seemed strange to anyone else, but it made sense to Jaina, oddly enough. Maybe because she'd hated to hear Arthas say it from the moment it had first fallen from Sylvanas’s lips. Maybe because when Sylvanas said her name, it sounded like love and safety and adoration all rolled into two simple syllables.</p>
<p>“I'm yours in ways I've never been anyone’s before,” Jaina responded after gathering her thoughts. “And I always will be.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas didn't even know what to say to that. It sounded so perfect. So reassuring </p>
<p>Sylvanas knew she’d meant it. </p>
<p>They made a lot of memories that night. In a lot of places. Some of those memories were hot and breathless and heavy and some of them were soft and deeply, overwhelmingly healing. </p>
<p>But all of them were everything Jaina had ever needed. Everything she'd ever hoped for. </p>
<p>Especially Sylvanas pulling a blanket over them both on the couch in the living room that had long ago become Jaina’s blissfully quiet haven from the storm of her life. Her dark, solitary haven illuminated, now, by the soft blue glow of Sylvanas’s eyes. Her quiet broken by the gentle murmurs of Sylvanas’s voice against her skin. </p>
<p>Most importantly, this night had cemented the idea in Jaina’s head that she could do this, again. And that it would be so, so much better the second time around.</p>
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</div>“I can't believe he's this stupid,” Valeera grumbled as she slumped into the corner of the elevator they'd found their way to after Tess checked them in. “Has the bastard told you he's married, yet?”<p>“Not a peep about marriage,” Tess remarked dryly with a lift of her brow as she looked over at Valeera and smiled. “You're precious when you're tired.”</p>
<p>“We just drove for four hours, I can't help it,” Valeera said, and Tess could hear the sulk in her tone.</p>
<p>“We’ll be in the room soon, and you can order us whatever you'd like from the room service menu,” Tess offered as consolation, and Valeera looked at her hopefully.</p>
<p>“Anything?”</p>
<p>“Anything,” Tess confirmed, pulling her keycard out of the back pocket of her jeans when the elevator door opened on their floor. One floor above Arthas. It wouldn't have been ideal to meet him in the corridor, after all. No, he'd specifically asked Tess to be at his room the next evening. He'd even given her a time. And Valeera? Valeera was her safety net, of course. Because she had no intention of going through with this.</p>
<p>And every intention of gathering every shred of proof she could that  Arthas did. </p>
<p>Besides, they both needed a change of scenery. </p>
<p>“And then you're gonna play with my hair while we watch cheap, embarrassing porn before bed?” Valeera sounded even more hopeful now. </p>
<p>“Of course, I am,” Tess said, tapping the key against the handle of their door and nudging it open with her hip so she could sit their bags just inside. </p>
<p>Valeera was a little stunned at first. Sure, she knew what an expensive hotel looked like.</p>
<p>But there was chilled champagne in their sitting room.</p>
<p>Champagne.</p>
<p>In the sitting room. </p>
<p>Tess chuckled when Valeera made a beeline for it and ignored the glasses to reach, instead, for the entire bottle.</p>
<p>“Okay all that sounds great, but we're gonna drink this, first,” Valeera informed Tess matter-of-factly.</p>
<p>“Out of the bottle?” Tess asked as she left their bags where she'd dropped them and walked over to plop down next to Valeera with a relieved sigh.</p>
<p>“We, uh...we can use the glasses if you want?” Valeera offered, looking over at Tess.</p>
<p>Tess released an amused breath and wondered how Valeera managed to be so damned desirable after such a hellish drive. So loveable.</p>
<p>“Fuck the glasses, love. I'll open it for you.”</p>
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<a name="section0021"><h2>21. I Found</h2></a>
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    <i>And I'll use you as a makeshift gauge</i><br/>
<i>Of how much to give and how much to take</i><br/>
<i>Oh I'll use you as a warning sign</i><br/>
<i>That if you talk enough sense then you'll lose your mind</i>
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    <i>Oh and I found love where it wasn't supposed to be</i><br/>
<i>Right in front of me</i><br/>
<i>Talk some sense to me</i>
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</div>Arthas sighed as he placed his bag down inside the door and kicked his shoes off. He was more than a little agitated about how his weekend had gone, and even more embarrassed than he was agitated.<p>He couldn’t believe he’d been stood up. And after the video call and all the pictures they’d exchanged, too. Emma had seemed like such a sure thing.  </p><p>He made his way through the house seeming, to Jaina, to be more disgruntled than usual. Even the way he barely looked at her on his way to their bedroom was off. </p><p>Then again, Jaina was just as off. Sitting silently at the dining room table bathed only in the lamplight from one of the tables in the sitting room across the way while she listened to him shower and rummage around in their...in <i>his</i> dresser for something to wear. </p><p>“We ordering dinner?” </p><p>Jaina’s attention snapped up to him as he stood in the archway of the dining room, and she shook her head. </p><p>“No, Arthas,” She said simply. Quietly. </p><p>“Okay...well. I guess I’ll just-”</p><p>“You’ve been all through the house without noticing there’s nothing of me left in it,” Jaina pointed out in a soft, tired tone. </p><p>Arthas narrowed his eyes in Jaina’s direction and looked around incredulously. He was too tired for this. He was just about to say so when Jaina slid a thick packet of paperwork in his direction.</p><p>“I've notified my attorney that I would be serving you personally. You should do the same in the morning. Have him look it all over. Refuse to sign. Make my life a living hell. Or try to, anyway. But nothing could be worse than this. Remember that, Arthas. No matter what you do to me, it will never be worse than staying.” </p><p>Jaina was staring at the packet on the table even as the sound of a car pulling up outside broke the silence that had fallen over them.</p><p>“That'll be Tandred. I'm taking my Benz, by the way. It's in my name. You can keep the Lexus. And the house. It's all there in the papers.” Jaina stood from the table with nothing in her hands. Not even her purse. Arthas realized, finally, that this wasn't a bluff.</p><p>“You're throwing it all away for nothing, Jaina,” he said quickly before she could make her way past him and out of the dining room. “For some low-life who can't even support you.” He was in a panic. He was enraged. He was mortified.</p><p>Jaina stopped long enough to look into Arthas’s eyes then. Her own were cold and almost empty in the most disconcerting way imaginable.</p><p>“You've never supported me, Arthas. You've simply spent years convincing yourself I'm a possession rather than a person. All while I've been the one supporting you. But please remember that I'm not leaving you for anyone. I'm just leaving you.”</p><p>Arthas’s jaw clenched and his eyes darkened in response, yet Jaina remained unimpressed as she stepped by him with a quiet ‘excuse me’ and headed for the door.</p><p>Arthas managed to gather enough of his senses to follow after a moment, and he jogged to catch up with her by the time she opened it and stepped out onto the wrap-around front porch.</p><p>He stopped in the doorway when his eyes locked with Tandred’s, who had stepped aside to let Jaina passed by him. </p><p>“This is private, Tandred,” Arthas said in a low, even tone. “Step aside so I can talk to my wife.”</p><p>Tandred didn't move an inch as Jaina headed for his car, and Arthas made a step towards him but the faint flicker of a smile on Tandred’s bearded face gave him pause.</p><p>“Yeah,” Tandred encouraged. “Try it.”</p><p>Arthas was seething.</p><p>To be challenged by someone was entirely outside of his wheelhouse.</p><p>To be challenged by someone even he had to admit would likely demolish him if things came to blows was almost too much to bear. </p><p>“Get off my property,” Arthas finally settled on, because at least he had that much power, still.</p><p>“Sure,” Tandred responded easily, and he glanced over his shoulder to make sure Jaina was safely in the car before he turned to address Arthas one more time. “Stay away from her, bud. It's between the lawyers now, yeah?”</p><p>“Oh, what the fuck are you going to do about it, Tandred?” Arthas spat without thinking as he reached for the handle of the door.</p><p>“Do you want me to answer that, or do you already know?” Tandred’s voice was low and a little rough. Arthas didn't like the look in his eyes, but it was the kind of look you certainly didn't want to point out to someone. </p><p>He stepped back across the threshold and shut the door, and Tandred rolled some of the tension from his shoulders when he heard the deadbolt slide into place.</p><p>The drive was quiet. Tandred couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Jaina look so exhausted. He didn't blame her. He was pretty sure she didn't get much sleep with Sylvanas the night before, and they'd driven her home at the crack of dawn to pick up the u-haul. </p><p>Even so, the dark circles under her eyes and the unusually visible fine lines beside their corners were troublesome.</p><p>“Are you hungry, J?” Tandred asked quietly, suddenly sounding like the baby brother he'd always been. Unsure and protective and kind and wonderful in a way that drew Jaina from whatever dark place she'd slipped into as the road took them farther and farther from Arthas and from everything she'd known and worked for for so long.</p><p>“No, Tan. I'm fine. Promise,” Jaina tried to offer him a reassuring smile, but whatever she actually managed had Tandred reaching over and holding his palm up for her.</p><p>Jaina swallowed thickly as she took his hand into her lap and stared down at the lines in it while he drove. </p><p>“You are such a good man, Tan,” Jaina murmured as she ran her thumb across a now-healing cut in the heel of a palm that had come back home dry and cracked. </p><p>“Which line says that?” Tandred asked as he glanced in Jaina’s direction.</p><p>“All of them,” Jaina responded with a weak smile as she slowly shifted in her seat so that she was curled in it - Tandred’s hand now clasped tightly in her own and her forehead resting on the window of the passenger door. </p><p>“Get some rest,” Tandred’s voice was quiet and familiar and soothing. “Still a bit of a drive. I'll wake you up when we get there.”</p>
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</div>Sylvanas drummed her fingertips against the banister of the little porch on the side of the duplex Tandred had told her was Jaina’s. She’d checked the text message more than once to make sure she’d gotten it right, but her nerves were just...well. Done. Beyond anything even remotely similar to ‘frazzled’.<p>Work had been hell today. All she’d thought about was Jaina. ‘Thought’ was tame, really. She’d been worried sick. But she understood why it was best she wasn’t involved in the moving process. The last thing either of them needed was for Arthas or a too-nosy neighbor to see her loading boxes. </p><p>At least the apartment was out of the way. And there was no way Arthas knew where it was. At least, not yet. Maybe that was adding to her general feelings of anxiety, too. Even the text she’d received from Tandred a few minutes ago that they were on their way hadn’t helped much.</p><p>She just needed to see Jaina. That’s what she kept telling herself. If she could just lay eyes on her she’d feel better about everything. </p><p>Strange, then, how her already rapid heartbeat became almost frantic when she saw Tandred’s now-familiar rental car turn down at the end of the dark street. </p><p>She hopped down the stairs two at a time and had to stop herself from jogging to the driveway, and she tried to school her expression carefully as Tandred got out of the car once it was parked and cast a smile in her direction. </p><p>“Hey,” He greeted, holding his arms out for her to offer her a hug. Sylvanas wasn’t usually a hugger but she really couldn’t help it with Tandred. Not after everything he’d done. Not to mention he was just...well. Jaina wasn’t the only one who found his presence comforting. </p><p>It was a quick hug, though, because Tandred was chuckling quietly when he noticed Sylvanas looking around his shoulder towards the car. </p><p>“She’s asleep. There’s a couple bags in the trunk. I can lug her in if you wanna grab them,” Tandred offered as he popped the latch on the key fob. </p><p>“Of course,” Sylvanas responded, though she would’ve much rather been the one carrying Jaina. Or attempting to, anyway. </p><p>It was probably best that Tandred did it - she surmised as she slung the remaining luggage over her shoulder and watched Tandred lift Jaina from the passenger seat effortlessly with only a grumble or two from Jaina as she leaned into his chest. </p><p>Sylvanas got to the door just in time to open it for him, and Tandred thanked her in a whisper before making his way through a small living room toward what Sylvanas could only assume was a bedroom. At least, she assumed so considering there was a sofa bed currently set up in the living room. </p><p>Her eyes followed Tandred after she looked around the dark apartment and all it's unpacked boxes quickly, and she caught up to him just in time to hear Jaina’s half-hearted complaints.</p><p>“Put me down, Tan, God. You said you'd wake me up.” </p><p>Sylvanas was in the doorway of the bedroom now as Jaina was placed on the edge of a bare mattress looking thoroughly disoriented and disgruntled. Tandred, on the other hand, was just smiling pleasantly as he rummaged through a nearby box to dig out a heavy blanket and place it on the foot of the bed.</p><p>“You aren't really mad at me,” Tandred countered. “Pizza? Or you going right to bed? Your girl is here, by the way. Thought you'd probably want her around tonight.”</p><p>Jaina’s eyes flashed, then, to the door only to find Sylvanas standing in it with her heavy burden of bags still pulling her slightly sideways and an almost forlorn smile on her face when their eyes met. “Just get yourself something, Tan. I'm not hungry.”</p><p>Tandred gasped in an almost comical way when he saw Sylvanas still standing there holding the bags. He moved across the room quickly to take them from her and place them down.</p><p>“There you go. Get back to your gazing, I'll leave the two of you alone,” Tandred remarked with a little pat to Sylvanas’s shoulder on his way out of the room. </p><p>He shut the door behind him, and the noise of it latching was enough to jog Sylvanas’s thoughts into some measure of function again. Enough, at least, to move to Jaina and stand in front of where she was sitting on the edge of the bed. </p><p>Jaina was the one that finally reached out - taking Sylvanas’s hands into her own as she looked up at her and stroked slowly across her knuckles. </p><p>“You worked all night,” Jaina observed because that was the only thing she could come up with right then. “You should be in bed.”</p><p>“I don't have to stay,” Sylvanas offered with a furrow of her brows, though Jaina only held onto her hands more tightly in response. “I just needed to see that you were okay.”</p><p>“I'm good,” Jaina breathed with a weak smile as her eyes shut for a moment when Sylvanas took a single step closer, bringing herself near enough to Jaina that Jaina could smell the freshness of the clothes she'd changed into and the lingering scent of hops on her skin. “I'm so glad you're here. Please stay.”</p><p>Sylvanas felt relief wash over her as Jaina finished speaking and then pressed her face against her stomach. </p><p>Jaina freed her hands from around Sylvanas's and slowly slid them around the backs of her thighs - running them up along the soft, well-work denim of her jeans and along the curve of her ass and back down. A familiar, subtly possessive gesture that Sylvanas found intensely comforting and needed. </p><p>“I left my bag in my car just in case,” Sylvanas murmured as she stroked over the top of Jaina’s head and then began carefully working her hair out of the braid it was in. “I should go get it so I can change.”</p><p>“Mm-mm,” Jaina argued in a murmur - her breath warm through Sylvanas's shirt where her parted lips were resting. “Just keep doing what you're doing for a while.”</p><p>Sylvanas didn't chuckle like she normally might have. There was something so jagged and raw in Jaina’s voice. The need coming through in her tone sounded almost like desperation and Sylvanas would've re-braided the braid she was undoing a hundred times if it would've soothed all the hurt Jaina was wading through. </p><p>“I'm still whatever you need me to be,” Sylvanas finally said quietly once the braid was long gone and she was just combing her fingers slowly through Jaina’s hair. “Just like I told you in the beginning.”</p><p>“You're everything,” Jaina whispered as she slowly pulled back and pulled gently at the backs of Sylvanas’s knees in a way that had her almost tumbling onto the bed.</p><p>In the end, Jaina moved them both until she was laying with her head on her lone pillow and Sylvanas’s hips were between her thighs. She was a comforting weight along Jaina’s body as she looked down at her almost searchingly. </p><p>“So are you,” Sylvanas admitted quietly, propping herself up on one arm so she could brush her fingertips along Jaina’s cheek. “Are you okay?”</p><p>“Not really,” Jaina breathed against Sylvanas’s thumb as it passed across her lips. “I'm trying so hard to be.”</p><p>“You don't need to do that,” Sylvanas replied in a soft, soothing tone. “You can be not-okay.”</p><p>“I should be just fine,” Jaina argued. “I've wanted out for years. I've wanted you. I've loved you. I've found everything I was always missing in you. I should be doing amazing right now.”</p><p>“But that isn't how it works, you know,” Sylvanas murmured as she slowly rolled them onto their sides facing one another and moved her arm so Jaina could rest her cheek against it. “It doesn’t matter how bad it was. It’s a big, huge, awful thing that you’re going through. You’re doing it on your own terms, sure, but the rug is out from under your feet nonetheless. But Jaina, I promise I’m not gonna let you fall. That’s not a thing that’s gonna happen.” </p><p>Jaina nodded faintly as she pressed closer to the other woman and glanced down at the blanket at the foot of the bed in a way that had Sylvanas nudging it up towards them with the toe of her boot. Jaina might’ve been impressed had she not been so emotionally overwhelmed. And then Sylvanas was kicking her boots off onto the floor and covering them both up at the same time while Jaina processed everything she’d said. </p><p>Once they were finally settled, Jaina reached for Sylvanas’s face to get her attention, and Sylvanas’s eyes settled on her immediately. </p><p>“I don’t want you to think I’m not happy that we get to be together, Syl. I don’t want you to think that. And it isn’t that I’m sad or that I...fuck. I don’t have the words, and I hate it.” </p><p>Jaina looked so frustrated that it was bordering on heartbreaking, and Sylvanas sighed quietly as she leaned in to press a gentle kiss to her forehead. </p><p>“I don’t think that,” Sylvanas whispered. “You realize it would be selfish of me to think that? That it would be unfair to you?”</p><p>“I...yeah. Yeah, on paper, it would.” </p><p>“No. It just would. Period. Jaina, we’re in this together. I’m just a person like anyone else, but I’m also well-versed in loss and trauma and everything that you’re going through. Maybe this was meant to happen, hm? Maybe I needed you and you needed me and it all happened at just the right time. Maybe good things happen to good people every so often, baby. I’m not sure. All I’m sure of is that nothing you’re feeling is wrong, and nothing you’re feeling is going to hurt me.”</p><p>Jaina shut her eyes against the tears that were burning in them and shifted to press one of her legs between Sylvanas’s own just to lock them together more securely. </p><p>“I’m tired,” Jaina whispered against Sylvanas’s lips, having moved towards them without really thinking. </p><p>“You should be,” Sylvanas responded as she carefully slipped a hand beneath Jaina’s shirt so that she could stroke along her back. She was about to urge Jaina to sleep with the other woman’s lips met her own, and she returned the kiss and lingered in it as long as Jaina seemed to want to. </p><p>When the kiss finally broke, Jaina settled into the comfort of knowing that she could just kiss Sylvanas. She could just kiss her and that would be it. She could just touch her stomach and that would be it. That would be enough.</p><p>She could even remind herself that she herself was enough for Sylvanas. They could start figuring out all the rest tomorrow. The unpacking. The living situation. The fact that Jaina truly didn’t mind having Tandred sleeping in the living room for now. </p><p>There were a million little things that would need to be tackled soon, but Jaina couldn’t even think about them right now. </p><p>Not when this was the first night that she could lay with Sylvanas without feeling guilty. </p><p>Not guilty about Arthas or her marriage. </p><p>Guilty because, since the very beginning, she’d wanted to give Sylvanas everything she could. As much of herself as she could. Since the very beginning, she’d known with all of her heart that Sylvanas deserved nothing less. </p><p>And all her gentle murmurs and touches in the dark bedroom only solidified that in Jaina’s mind. </p><p>The only difference, now, was that she could finally start doing that. She could finally begin giving to Sylvanas what Sylvanas had always given her. </p><p>She fell asleep hopeful, and Sylvanas woke in the early morning hours with Jaina’s body jerking faintly against her own. Trying desperately to pull away without disturbing her, lest the sobs she was choking back break from her throat and shatter the peace she’d convinced herself she’d found so quickly and so effortlessly. </p><p>But nothing was ever so easy. </p><p>Not even this. Jesus Christ, she couldn’t even manage to hold it together for one night without Sylvanas sitting up in bed and reaching quickly for her arm. </p><p>“Don’t go,” Sylvanas’s voice was raspy in the darkness and the glow of her eyes was a beacon in it as Jaina’s blurry vision focused on nothing in the pitch black. “Stay with me. Jaina, it’s okay. Just stay. Just cry, baby.” </p><p>Jaina shook her head as Sylvanas wrapped an arm around her middle from behind her and pulled her back into bed when she nearly escaped it. Yet, Jaina now had a vice-like grip on her forearm with both hands. </p><p>Her breaths were almost panicked, now. Sharp and painful and far too shallow as Sylvanas battled with the blankets she was tangled in to get herself all the way up so she could pull Jaina backward into her arms. </p><p>Once she managed it, Jaina was stiff as a board against her, and Sylvanas lifted a hand to guide her head back so it was against her shoulder. In Jaina’s panicked daze, Sylvanas slowly moved the arm that was wrapped around her and found one of Jaina’s hands so that she could guide it over her chest and hold it there. </p><p>“What’s your favorite color?” Sylvanas asked in a tone that wasn’t anywhere near as emotion-filled as she felt. </p><p>Jaina shook her head as she tried to force another breath into her lungs. </p><p>“Green?” Sylvanas asked. “You’re so gorgeous in green.”</p><p>Jaina shook her head and almost demanded that Sylvanas stop until Sylvanas spoke again. </p><p>“Blue, then,” Sylvanas whispered. “You have a pen with you almost all the time. It’s blue. It has your initials on it, but they’re J.P. Tell me about the pen.” </p><p>“It...it was...my father got it for me when I got accepted into college,” Jaina managed to gasp. “Blue,” She continued, her voice trembling dangerously. “It’s blue. I’m sorry.” </p><p>“Blue, then,” Sylvanas whispered as she slowly turned Jaina around in her arms. “Like the sky and the sea. Vast and endless and steady. Always there. No matter where we are. Constant. Have you ever watched the tide come in slow? When each little wave overtakes the last against the sand? It’s happening right now somewhere, you know. One wave after the next, slow and gentle and infinite.”</p><p>Sylvanas’s voice was almost strangely rhythmic. The beats of her speech were timed just so. </p><p>Jaina hadn’t even realized she could breathe again by the time she stopped speaking. All she knew was she was crying quietly into the crook of her neck and clinging to her shirt. </p><p>“That’s how I love you,” Sylvanas finally continued after carefully pulling Jaina’s hair away from her face where her tears were threatening to hold it captive against her skin. “It’s vast and endless and steady. No matter where I am or what I’m doing. You’re a current in me. Ebbing and flowing. One wave after another. I’d drown in you if you weren’t so gentle.” </p><p>Jaina felt weak, suddenly, in Sylvanas’s arms. Not in a way that scared her. Just in a way that...was. </p><p>Sylvanas slowly lowered them back into bed and held Jaina through the last shudders of everything that was wreaking havoc on her mind and body. </p><p>Jaina managed a weak ‘I love you’ in return to everything Sylvanas had said. </p><p>“I know,” Sylvanas murmured. “I think you love me better and more wholly than you know. And I love being loved by you, Jaina. I love all of you. And I’ll love you in the morning after you rest. I’ll love you when I’m helping you unpack those boxes. I’ll always love you.” </p><p>Jaina hadn’t realized how badly she’d needed to hear those words until just then, but God, she had. And she felt so much better for having heard them. Maybe not entirely ‘okay’. But better. Better enough that when she drifted off again, she was out for far longer than she had any intention of being. </p><p>That was alright, though. Because Sylvanas had no intention of waking her. Not even when she woke to the sun blaring through the curtainless windows into her eyes. </p><p>She was only thankful the unforgiving rays were hitting her instead of Jaina.</p>
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<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Let It Go</h2></a>
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</div>Sylvanas groaned quietly as she spread out in bed to find it tragically empty. Something she would've been used to a month ago. Something she most definitely wasn't used to, now.<p>In fact, she hadn't slept in the loft since that first night. She was feeling the effects of how spoiled she'd gotten as she sat up and looked around for Jaina, bleary-eyed and sorely missing the warmth of her body. </p>
<p>But then, it was well past eleven, and even though Jaina hadn't worked since she'd served Arthas, she simply couldn't seem to break her early bird habits. </p>
<p>Sylvanas sighed at herself and slipped from the bed, shuffling across the room to pull her pants on and rummage in the drawers she now shared with Jaina for an undershirt. She didn't even bother trying to fix the wild mess of her hair before she wandered towards the kitchen and the smell of fresh coffee.</p>
<p>It called to her as surely as the fact that Jaina was out there did. </p>
<p>Her mildly grumpy morning mood dissipated when she saw Jaina at the little kitchen island typing away at her MacBook, a glass of wine next to her and a fresh out for Sylvanas still dispensing its last life-giving drops. </p>
<p>That must've been what had woken her. She loved that smell. </p>
<p>She stopped on her way to the much-needed surprise, though, to press up behind Jaina and wrap her arms around her so that she could press a few kisses along her shoulder.</p>
<p>“Mm, breakfast wine,” Sylvanas murmured, and Jaina turned her attention slowly from what she was doing.</p>
<p>“Mhm. Morning, sleepyhead. I'm sorry you had such a late night last night. I don't even know what time it was when you got in,” Jaina followed those words with a soft kiss to Sylvanas’s lips. </p>
<p>“Around three,” Sylvanas murmured against Jaina’s lips, and Jaina lingered after the kiss. For a while, actually. And her hand had begun to wander up the back of Sylvanas’s thigh.</p>
<p>“I'm sorry, sweetheart,” Jaina breathed as Sylvanas lowered her head to press the gentlest of kisses against the side of Jaina’s neck. </p>
<p>“No biggie,” Sylvanas responded with an easy smile before she finally managed to pull herself away and run a hand over Jaina’s hair. “I still got to wake up knowing you were here. Best morning ever. What are you working on?” </p>
<p>Jaina sighed heavily and shook her head as she turned her attention back to her computer screen. “I got Arthas’s attorney’s response this morning via Lor’themar. I’m looking it over for discrepancies and loopholes. Lor’themar already has, but...well. You know how I am.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas hummed thoughtfully in the back of her throat as she fixed herself and Jaina both a cup of coffee before returning to the kitchen island. She didn’t prod. She just watched Jaina switch her wine out for the coffee and began scrolling through her phone until Jaina found another stopping point. </p>
<p>“He’s asking for everything,” Jaina finally said, sounding once-removed from everything. “The language insinuates the last thing I want is to take this to court. I’m beginning to think that might be wise, despite Lor’themar insisting we should fight it.” </p>
<p>“Why not fight it, then?” Sylvanas asked with a lift of a brow as she placed her coffee mug down and looked over the top of Jaina’s laptop screen. </p>
<p>“I…” Jaina trailed off and sighed heavily before she finally shut her laptop. She’d read all these words at least four times. She’d been at it for hours, already. She had never felt so done. “I’m tired of fighting, I guess. I feel like I’ve been fighting for years. And then I have you to think about.” </p>
<p>“Me?” Sylvanas asked, confusion evident in her tone and in her expression. “Baby, you really shouldn’t feel the need to be thinking about me, right now. That’s the last thing I want.” </p>
<p>“Of course, I have to think about you,” Jaina responded as though it should’ve been obvious. “I don’t want you to feel obligated to stick around for this to get dragged through court for months. I don’t want you to have to go through even a fraction of what I’ve been through with him. It isn’t your job to deal with any of this.” </p>
<p>Jaina looked as though she had more to say. As though she was just taking a moment to gather her thoughts before she kept going. </p>
<p>Sylvanas reached for her hand and covered it with her own before she had the chance. </p>
<p>“I don’t care about him, Jaina. I don’t care about his dick-waving or his money. I care about you. But...I’m pretty sure you know that, yeah? So is this about something else, then?” As if to soften that almost-accusation, Sylvanas stroked softly across Jaina’s knuckles in a way that was almost coaxing. </p>
<p>Jaina looked away from her and shook her head, but she didn’t pull her hand away. Instead, she turned it over so Sylvanas could wrap it in her own. </p>
<p>“Maybe I’m a little scared, you know?” She finally murmured as she drummed the tips of her fingers of her free hand against the counter. “Maybe I have a lot of self-worth tied into who I was. Maybe I don’t know if I have enough to keep you here with me if it gets dirty. Even if I know you’re a wonderful person. Even if I’m so absolutely sure that you are. And maybe I’m fucked up for that, and I should probably apologize if I’ve insinuated...no. I have absolutely insinuated something, here. I know I have. I’m just- I’m just a little bit all over the place.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas only held her hand a little tighter and smiled at her faintly. “It’s totally valid for you to be all over the place right now. I’m sure you know that deep down somewhere. I don’t think you’ve insinuated anything unfair. You have every right to ask me whatever you need to ask me. Just like you have every right to worry about whatever it is that’s worrying you. But there’s nothing that could make me go anywhere. I know that you know that. If you fight it, I’ll fight with you. If you settle, well...we still have each other. And I can’t tell you how much that’s all I’ve ever cared about.” </p>
<p>Jaina nodded and gave Sylvanas her best attempt at a smile. That was about all she had to give right then, and she knew Sylvanas understood. God, she'd gone so long not knowing that. Or, more accurately, never even being remotely understood.</p>
<p>But everything about this was different. She didn't get a sigh or an eye-roll as she opened her laptop back up to keep working. All she got was a fresh cup of coffee after a while and a soft, unobtrusive kiss.</p>
<p>As unobtrusive as it was, and as much as Jaina appreciated the sentiment, she still wrapped a hand around Sylvanas’s wrist to keep her close.</p>
<p>“I was just going to lay down,” Sylvanas murmured. “Work really was rough last night.”</p>
<p>“I'll come with you if that's alright.” </p>
<p>Of course, it was alright. More than alright, really. Sylvanas was still getting used to little things like this. Little insignificant, everyday things that she could now share with Jaina like breakfast and naps. A hundred little things that she’d spent the past months reminding herself every day that she would one day get to have. </p>
<p>They were nestled away back in their bed soon. Sylvanas was running a hand through Jaina’s hair. She’d left it down today. She left it down more often than not, now that she wasn’t working. Jaina was smiling at her in that soft, special way reserved only for one person. Only for Sylvanas. </p>
<p>It was a long time before Sylvanas finally said something. As though if she spoke it would break the spell of the moment. </p>
<p>“Where’s Tan, today?” </p>
<p>“Renewing his rental and taking care of some things,” Jaina explained simply. He’d taken to staying at the hotel down the street most nights, though sometimes the pull-out couch was still used. It just depended upon a myriad of things. He’d become very attuned to the way Jaina and Sylvanas were with each other. When they might like privacy. When they might like his company. </p>
<p>It had been wonderful, really. Having him around. But that didn’t mean they weren’t thankful for the time alone. </p>
<p>Sylvanas hummed in response and the corner of her mouth turned up slightly as Jaina propped herself up on one elbow to look down at her. </p>
<p>“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something, Syl. I actually...I’ve been nervous about it. I don’t know how you’re going to take it, honestly.” </p>
<p>There was a slight tremor in Jaina’s tone that had Sylvanas immediately worried. </p>
<p>“Baby, you can talk to me about anything. Please tell me you know that.” </p>
<p>Jaina nodded without hesitation. </p>
<p>“You’ve made that clear, sweetheart. Don’t worry. It’s just a big, big thing, you know? A big, scary thing...I-” Jaina drew in a deep breath and sat up in bed so quickly that Sylvanas thought it might be best just to stay laying on her side as she tried not to let her nerves get the better of her. “Sylvanas, I want to move. Away from here. Away from him. From the firm. There’s a not-for-profit women’s center in dire need of legal rep and I just feel so strongly that’s where I’m supposed to be. We’ve been in contact. Not much. Once or twice. I just didn’t want to give them an answer until I spoke with you about it.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas blinked and looked away. Her first instinct, of course, was that Jaina was leaving. That this was just a formality before she did. She had to forcefully remind herself that Jaina wouldn’t do that. </p>
<p>“So...okay. Okay, that’s wonderful. I think that would be so good for you. If I’m honest, I thought you might want to go. I’ve thought about it a lot. About the bar and everything and what it would mean.”</p>
<p>Jaina was quiet for a moment, looking down at her own hands as she folded them and picked lightly at her cuticles. Nervously. </p>
<p>“I don’t want to go anywhere without you,” Jaina finally admitted with a furrow between her brows. “And I don’t know what to do.” </p>
<p>“I want to come with you,” Sylvanas said suddenly, without even really thinking about it first. “I don’t know if this is an invitation or not, but I hope it is. I want to come with you. I’ve been thinking about how well Valeera would handle the bar. She’s running it more than I am, now, and I could hire a bar manager for her. Be a silent partner until I’m sure she can stand on her feet and then withdraw entirely.” </p>
<p>Jaina’s eyes shut but not quick enough to stop a tear slipping down her cheek. She caught it quickly, though. But she still sniffled quietly as she nodded.</p>
<p>Sylvanas was sitting up immediately and pulling her close. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Sylvanas whispered into her hair as she held onto the back of Jaina’s shirt. “If that wasn’t what you needed me to say-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s exactly what I’ve been praying you’d say,” Jaina cut her off quickly. “God, Syl, I don’t want to do <i>anything</i> without you. Ever again.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas sighed heavily into Jaina’s shoulder and nodded because she didn’t really feel like she could successfully get any actual words out right then. </p>
<p>They wound up laying back down together - caught up in a series of slow, soft kisses that were more reassuring and grounding than anything else might have been right then. And touches, of course. Jaina draping her thigh over Sylvanas’s hip. Sylvanas holding her hip and stroking the hollow of it gently with her thumb beneath her sweater.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>Tess didn’t look around much when she walked into the office. A rented office, that much was obvious. She was almost impressed Lor’themar had done this for a single divorce case but then, she was also well aware of the things money could buy.<p>She had no small amount herself, after all. </p>
<p>That day, she’d dressed the part. Designer dress. Designer heels. A coat to match with a fur-lined collar and sunglasses that hid her eyes. </p>
<p>None of that mattered, really. Nor did Lor’themar’s surprised brow-lift as she walked into his office, having ignored the receptionist still trying to keep up with her. </p>
<p>“What’s this, then?” He asked as he placed his pen down and steepled his hands over the file he’d been reviewing all while the receptionist looked on helplessly from behind Tess in the door frame. </p>
<p>Tess held up a manilla envelope - thick from print-outs and jump drives. </p>
<p>“The Menethil case,” she said simply, “You’ll want to see this.” </p>
<p>She placed the packet down on his desk and he glanced down at it at first before pulling it towards himself to lift the little tabs that would allow him to open it. </p>
<p>Tess was gone the next time he looked up, and the receptionist was beside herself over having been disregarded so handily. </p>
<p>“Mr. Theron, I tried,” She stated with agitation dripping from her tone. “She didn’t have an appointment. Never called. I swear.” </p>
<p>“I believe you,” Lor’themar said, only half paying attention as he began flipping through the pages. “...Why don’t you head out for the day? Treat yourself to a nice dinner. You know where the card is.”</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>Arthas was already having a bad day. But then, he was always having a bad day lately. His father had hired him a housekeeper, at least, so there was that.<p>But now he’d been summoned for a meeting that could’ve been about literally everything. Especially the fact that what little work he had to do around the firm had been suffering lately. Perhaps all the late-night benders with junior partners who were still young enough to recover from them in time to work the next day. </p>
<p>At least, that’s what he’d been expecting until he opened the door and saw his father sitting behind his desk with his monitor turned around. </p>
<p>“Sit,” Terenas ordered as he gestured towards the chair opposite the one he was sitting in. </p>
<p>Arthas narrowed his eyes as he further attempted to sus out what, exactly, he’d done wrong this time. </p>
<p>As he plopped down in the chair, he realized the expression on his father’s face wasn’t the usual ‘boys-will-be-boys’ type deal usually reserved for his son. </p>
<p>“So, let me get this straight, Arthas,” Terenas’s voice was dry and even and low. “You expect me to clean up all your messes. Do your dirty work for you. Smooth things over with your <i>own</i> wife for <i>years</i>. And then - when she finally leaves you - you can’t even wait until the divorce is final to fuck that up, too?”</p>
<p>Arthas felt a tingle rise along his spine and spread across his scalp as his eyes flashed from his father’s face to the screen that had been turned to face him. </p>
<p>“Your name?” Terenas demanded. “You gave this woman your name. In a text message. From <i>your</i> number. You put your face in every photo you sent her. Notice she didn’t do the same for you? No, of course, you didn’t notice.” </p>
<p>Arthas looked away from the screen and reached for something on his father’s desk to fiddle with and nearly jumped out of his seat when one of Terenas’s fists made sudden, loud contact with his desk. </p>
<p>Terenas was on his feet, then, leaning over his desk. “Are you fucking listening to me?!” </p>
<p>Arthas’s jaw set tightly and his eyes snapped to meet his father’s. “Dad, this is just some bullshit. It can be brushed under the rug. We can proceed as we were. You shouldn’t be this stressed about it.” </p>
<p>“No, you couldn’t wait a few months to chase some piece of ass because you’re <i>stupid</i> enough to believe it was just some piece of ass. It never even <i>occurred</i> to you that you were the one being chased, did it? Of course, not. Of fucking course, not. No. No, you aren’t getting out of this one, Arthas. I’m not doing this, again. I’m not doing this anymore.”</p>
<p>Arthas was stunned as his father sat back down. His ears were still ringing from the sheer power of his father’s voice. </p>
<p>But he seemed so strangely calm, now. Calm in a way that made Arthas an entirely different type of nervousness. </p>
<p>“I’m dropping your counter-petition. Agreeing to her incredibly generous offers. You’re lucky she wants nothing to do with the house, but if she did? Well, there’s always my guest house, I suppose. In any event, I need you to sign these.” </p>
<p>Arthas looked down in shock at Jaina’s original paperwork. Unaltered. Exactly the same copies she’d first left on the kitchen table over a month ago. </p>
<p>“Sign them, or you can find another set of coattails to ride, Arthas. I don’t want this firm’s reputation dragged through the mud.” Terenas placed his pen down atop the stack of papers and leaned back in his chair. “No more. This ends now.” </p>
<p>“Dad-”</p>
<p>“No,” Terenas cut him off with little inflection to his tone. “No, we’re done. You’re done. I refuse to help you fuck that woman over any longer. I’ve done a lot of things in my life that I’m not proud of, but unlike you - I have a sense of shame about me. And I’ve reached my limit.” </p>
<p>Arthas picked up the hand and looked at the way the gold glinted in the dim lighting of the office for a while before he flipped to the final page. </p>
<p>Terenas’s eyes didn’t move from the pen-tip as he scrawled his name on the line. </p>
<p>The moment he was done, Terenas pulled the packet back towards himself and slid it into a thick envelope that was already stamped and addressed. Before this meeting, then, Arthas supposed. </p>
<p>“Take a week off,” Terenas said, his tone a little gentler now as he sealed the envelope and placed it on a stack of outgoing correspondence. “Get it together. Come back ready to work.” </p>
<p>Arthas cleared his throat and stood from his chair, but before he could make it out of the door, Terenas called him and he turned to look at his father. </p>
<p>“And next time you find a woman who will put up with you, please do us both a favor and try to be a man who doesn’t require any such thing as ‘putting up with’,” Terenas said with no malice in his tone. Maybe even a bit of sadness. “She was a good one, Arthas. Don’t blame her. But learn from it. Please. For my sake.” </p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Arthas said quietly, his hand still lingering on the handle of the door. </p>
<p>“Don’t apologize to me. Or her. I’m quite sure she doesn’t need it. Just use it as I said. Use it to become a decent man.” </p>
<p>Arthas nodded numbly and slipped out of the office. </p>
<p>Behind him, Terenas stared for a long while at a framed picture he always kept on his desk. </p>
<p>“I tried, Lianne,” He said quietly to the picture, shutting his eyes tightly and running a hand over his long-grey hair. He liked to think he’d tried. Done his best. </p>
<p>He could never have imagined the boy he’d sent to college - the boy who’d called him and told him he’d met a girl - would wind up like this. </p>
<p>As much as he didn’t want it to be his fault, it had to be someones. </p>
<p>But all he could do now was make it right. </p>
<p>And so he, himself, grabbed the packet and threw his coat and his scarf on. No need for the mail. He knew where Jaina’s attorney had set up camp. He might as well go there, himself. Make this right, himself, even if Arthas was still struggling with what, exactly, ‘right’ was.</p>
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  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div>“What are you thinking about?” Sylvanas’s voice was gentle and unobtrusive. Still a little raspy with sleep from the nap Jaina’d woken up from before Sylvanas had. But she was still awake enough to notice when Jaina seemed half a world away.<p>Jaina swallowed thickly and reached for Sylvanas’s hand to find it all too willing to wrap around her own. </p>
<p>“I just love you,” Jaina whispered a little breathlessly. “So much. I love the way you sleep, even. The way you breathe.” </p>
<p>Sylvanas moved a little closer to Jaina and reached to touch along her cheek to turn her head so she could look into her eyes just before she kissed her gently. </p>
<p>“I love you more every day,” Sylvanas whispered against her lips. “We’re gonna do this, Jaina. I know it with all my heart. I know we’re gonna do this.” </p>
<p>Jaina let out a trembling breath and pushed Sylvanas onto her back with a suddenness she hadn’t been expecting, but Sylvanas had always been good with rolling with things. Including the way Jaina clutched at her sides and pressed her face into the crook of her neck for a while before pressing a soft kiss there. </p>
<p>“You promise?” Jaina asked - her voice breathy and soft as her hands finally relinquished their bruising grip on Sylvanas’s sides and slid down towards her thighs to stroke along them, instead. </p>
<p>“I promise,” Sylvanas whispered, reaching for the back of Jaina’s neck to pull her so their foreheads were resting together. </p>
<p>“It’s so strange believing that when someone says it to me,” Jaina admitted as one of her hands wandered down Sylvanas’s thigh to trail beneath her shirt against her stomach. “But I believe you.” </p>
<p>“I always want you to believe me. I’d never tell you anything but the truth.” </p>
<p>“I do believe you. Always,” Jaina responded quietly. “Please don’t go anywhere.”</p>
<p>“Never,” Sylvanas gasped as Jaina’s hand trailed a little higher and grazed along the underside of her breast. “Wherever you are is where I’m gonna be, Jaina.” </p>
<p>“Good,” Jaina breathed emphatically against Sylvanas’s cheek as she dragged her lips towards her ear to nip gently at the lobe of it. </p>
<p>Jaina found it was easy to make new memories with Sylvanas. Or at least dull the ones she didn’t want. </p>
<p>And that night, all she wanted was Sylvanas. Sylvanas and these new, beautiful memories instead of the ones that sometimes haunted her when things were too quiet and too still. </p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
</div><i>“What’s your name?” Arthas was smiling a smile he thought might be charming but was actually quite ridiculous...in an altogether charming way. “I gotta have a name to go with those pretty eyes.” </i><p>
  <i>“Jaina,” Jaina said with a smile from her place atop Arthas’s chest. “Why do you always do this?”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I keep trying to make up for the fact that when we met it was because I was knocking you over in the courtyard because I was too hungover to walk in a straight line.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You don’t have to make up for anything,” Jaina responded with a soft laugh, and Arthas’s hand came up to stroke along her cheek gently. “I always tell you you’re doing just fine. When will you believe me?” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Arthas shrugged faintly and tangled one of his legs with Jaina’s beneath the sheets they’d managed to turn into a jumble throughout the night. One of the rare nights Jaina wasn’t studying for something important and Arthas didn’t have plans with his fellow frat boys. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I just wanna do good,” Arthas responded quietly, tucking a fly-away behind Jaina’s ear carefully as he looked up into her eyes while she brushed her fingertips in little patterns against his chest. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You are,” Jaina reassured with a warm smile. “You will. Just stay just how you are and you’ll be just fine.”</i>
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<a name="section0023"><h2>23. All Through The Night</h2></a>
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    <i>We have no past, we won't reach back</i>
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    <i>Keep with me forward all through the night</i>
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    <i>And once we start the meter clicks</i>
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    <i>And it goes running all through the night</i>
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    <i>Until it ends, there is no end</i>
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</div>“We're in a relationship, right?”<p>Valeera sounded almost weary in a way that made Tess pause in her task of kissing slowly down her stomach. </p>
<p>Valeera smiled at her faintly when she looked up. </p>
<p>“Yes, Love, I believe we are. I think that happened some time over the course of you moving in with me.”</p>
<p>“Did it?” Valeera asked lazily as she propped her head on one hand on the arm of the chair she was sitting in and reached out to stroke through Tess’s hair with the other. “I think you might be right.”</p>
<p>Tess was used to Valeera’s teasing by now. But that didn't mean she was always prepared for it. Not that she shouldn't have been. The fact that they were in the middle of having sex hadn't ever stopped her before. </p>
<p>“Having second thoughts?” Tess asked on a more serious note as Valeera curled a lock of her hair around the length of her finger idly. </p>
<p>Valeera shook her head and draped one of her legs over Tess’s shoulder. </p>
<p>“No, I'm just feeling disgustingly sentimental today and I think we should switch places.”</p>
<p>“How so?” Tess asked, genuinely curious. </p>
<p>“I think you should get comfortable in this chair and let me start for once. Because you deserve it or some shit, I dunno.” </p>
<p>“Romantic,” Tess quipped but lifted herself from where she was kneeling in front of Valeera’s chair, anyway. “I'd rather have you in my lap if I'm honest. If that's on the table.”</p>
<p>Valeera wasn't about to argue. She liked being close to Tess more than she had the words to express it. As soon as Tess was settled in the chair, Valeera slipped onto her lap and leaned in to kiss her. An uncharacteristically soft kiss for Valeera that ended with a gentle catch of Tess’s full lower lip with her fangs. Not even enough to sting.</p>
<p>Tess didn't comment on the softness of it. Much better to just appreciate these moments when they came. </p>
<p>“Mm-mm,” Valeera warned as Tess’s hands wandered down over the curve of her ass and her fingertips trailed just a touch too far inward. “Me, first.”</p>
<p>Tess lifted her hands back to Valeera’s slender sides in defeat and Valeera rewarded her with a kiss against her cheek. </p>
<p>“Better,” she whispered as her own hands palmed Tess’s full, soft breasts - feeling over them for a moment before her thumbs grazed over nipples until they were stiff and overly sensitive. </p>
<p>“Kiss me, Tess,” Valeera murmured against the corner of Tess’s mouth, and Tess turned her head to press their lips together as Valeera leaned over as far as she could to grab the little vibrator that often resides on their bedside table. </p>
<p>Valeera never would've imagined having a bedroom big enough to have an overstuffed armchair in it. A bedroom with a full bookshelf and plants that loved to soak up the morning sun currently flooding in through windows that were partially open for the first spring air to chase away the stuffiness of winter. </p>
<p>Tess was still kissing her when Valeera pressed their toy between her legs. Too cold and with no vibration to ease the shock.</p>
<p>Tess jumped and Valeera chuckled quietly into their kiss as she turned it on.</p>
<p>“Bitch,” Tess whispered against Valeera’s lips.</p>
<p>“Yeah, baby,” Valeera responded as she found Tess’s clit easily and pressed the strong vibrations of the toy directly against it. “Talk dirty to me.” </p>
<p>Tess whimpered quietly at first. The stimulation was too much and too direct for her to come up with a witty retort, and Valeera knew that. That's why Valeera was already pressing a string of gentle, coaxing kisses along her jaw. </p>
<p>“Ride it out,” Valeera murmured against her ear as her hips writhed so strongly Valeera had trouble keeping her balance in her lap. She dipped the toy a little lower to slick it with the wetness dripping from Tess’s entrance and moved it right back up again, only now it was in slow, steady circles.</p>
<p>The tension in Tess’s body eased and she leaned back in the chair to grip the arms of it as her eyes opened just enough so that she could look up at Valeera. </p>
<p>“Why are you so good at this?” There was a tremor in Tess’s voice as her thighs began to tense.</p>
<p>“Because you're into it,” Valeera said with a smirk. “And maybe because I'm a little bit good at it.”</p>
<p>Tess rolled her eyes and groaned in pleasure all at once as she hiked her hips up from the cushion and her breaths came quicker and harder. </p>
<p>She came quicker than she might have liked, but Valeera didn't seem to mind as she switched off the vibrator and settled down in her lap rather smugly. </p>
<p>Tess was grinning a slow, lazy grin as she gave Valeera’s hair a gentle tug.</p>
<p>“What a weird ‘thank you’,” Valeera remarked despite the fact that she very much enjoyed having her hair pulled.</p>
<p>“Mm, was it really, though?” Tess asked knowingly as her hand slid higher and higher along Valeera’s inner thigh.</p>
<p>“Yeah, but do it again,” Valeera said as she lounged back against the arm of the chair - one leg draped over the opposite one and the other dangling over the edge atop Tess’s thigh, putting her on full, proud display. </p>
<p>Tess did it again, of course. In fact, she gathered a fistful of Valeera’s hair in her hand as she played in the slickness between her legs until Valeera was hugging quietly in protest.</p>
<p>“Use your words, Love,” Tess teased with a smile.</p>
<p>“Fuck you. I love you. But fuck you.”</p>
<p>“No, you already had your turn,” Tess responded sagely, and Valeera flashed one of her fangs in a display of distaste at being teased so horribly. </p>
<p>“I meant fuck me, obviously. Like with your hand. Your fingers, to be exact. Two. Three if you're feeling froggy. I know I am.” </p>
<p>Tess made a low sound of appreciation and smiled into the next kiss they shared. Or rather the next kiss she pulled Valeera into by the grip she had on her hair, much to Valeera’s delight. </p>
<p>They'd set their alarm that morning with every intention of having breakfast, but by the time they were showered and dressed they'd even missed brunch, and Valeera was starving.</p>
<p>Hungry enough, in fact, that Tess heard her stomach growl as she pulled a light sweater on over her head. She looked at Valeera in concern.</p>
<p>“Wasting away, then, are we?” She asked with a crooked smile, and Valeera gave her a teasing little pout that she didn't at all mean in return.</p>
<p>“I have a shipment to receive at the bar in an hour. I'll have to pick something up on the way,” Valeera sounded positively dejected as she tied the laces of her converse and grabbed her jean jacket from the coat rack in the corner of their bedroom.</p>
<p>“You aren't getting out of our date that easy, Valeera,” Tess chided, grabbing her keys and holding the bedroom door open for both of them. “We’ll pick up lunch and eat at the bar and I'll help you with the shipment. Not that I'm complaining about those guns of yours.”</p>
<p>They were still arguing light-heartedly about what, exactly, qualified as guns all the way to the car.</p>
<p>They ended up settling on pizza. Mostly because it was Valeera’s favorite. A little because it had become a guilty pleasure of Tess’s over the course of their relationship.</p>
<p>And the bar?</p>
<p>Well. The bar was flourishing. An influx of cash from Tess when she'd approached Sylvanas about being an investor had seen to that. Everything was reupholstered. The bar top was new and gorgeous and polished to a shine every night by the three full-time tenders Valeera now had to keep on staff. But she still handled the shipments. Old habits died hard. </p>
<p>Hell, there were even two levels, now. The top floor had been gutted and turned into somewhat of a club. A totally different energy than the soothing, mellow yellow lights of the main floor. </p>
<p>It was all the rage to go to Dive on a Saturday night, now. And Tess’s presence didn't hurt that in the slightest. She was magnetic every time she came around, which was nearly every night. Greeting and mingling and helping Valeera keep a handle on things when they threatened to become too big and too much. </p>
<p>Not that Tess needed the money. Really, all Tess needed was this new life they were living together. All Tess needed was to see Valeera flourish, and God, she was flourishing.</p>
<p>She believed in herself more every day. She was sharp enough to question the accountant they'd hired about discrepancies even Tess hadn't noticed. Hard-working enough that she never missed a day, despite the fact that they had plenty of staff for her to take some much-needed time off.</p>
<p>They would get there, eventually. Tess would find a way to bribe her adequately, she was almost sure of it.</p>
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</div>Sylvanas sighed as she tapped her pen thoughtfully on the edge of her notepad. Her briefcase and laptop were taking up most of the room on the kitchen table, but she didn't mind it at all. Jaina was much more hyper-focused on organization, so it only made sense that she take the office until they were able to finish the garage.<p>Sure, Sylvanas could've crept in and used her nice, spacious, erroneously clean desk while Jaina was at the center, but she would never. That was Jaina’s space. And this was hers.</p>
<p>Her space to finish looking over a few case files Jaina had recommended be sent her way. They were cases the social workers she was overseeing were already working on, anyway, so they'd have crossed her desk at some point or another. Not that Sylvanas spent all that much time in her office in the city. She much preferred to get out and be as hands-on as possible when she could.</p>
<p>Tonight was bonus time, though. The time before Jaina got home when Sylvanas had an hour or two to dot her i’s and cross her t’s because she couldn't stand the thought of anything slipping through the cracks. Not again.</p>
<p>Just before she could think too deeply about ‘again’, she heard Jaina’s car pull up the drive followed quickly by the slightly whiny garage door motor. She made a good effort at straightening the mess she'd made of their dining room table, but the minute the door to the mudroom opened and Jaina didn't call out for her, Sylvanas knew something was up.</p>
<p>Jaina always announced her presence when she got home. She always stood at the door of the little mudroom because Sylvanas liked to take her bag from her and kiss her every night when she got home. </p>
<p>Tonight, though, Jaina was quiet. Sylvanas heard her drop her bag on the bench inside the door and she rounded the corner to the terrible sight of Jaina’s hands shaking and a few wet streaks from tears on her cheeks.</p>
<p>“Baby...fuck,” Sylvanas rushed over and reached for Jaina’s hands while she still clutched the envelope. “Baby, look at me. Look at me. What's wrong?”</p>
<p>Jaina swallowed thickly as she looked up at Sylvanas and pressed the envelope into her hands.</p>
<p>“I got the mail,” Jaina whispered.</p>
<p>“I'm sorry. I totally forgot to stop by the box when I got home. I'll-”</p>
<p>“No, no, just...just open it. Please,” Jaina drew in a shuddering breath and pulled her glasses from the bridge of her nose so she could wipe at her eyes for what felt like the hundredth time all in the span of about five minutes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay,” Sylvanas said in a tone she hoped was reassuring, but was in actuality far too urgent to be. </p>
<p>She tore it open in front of Jaina and unfolded the thick, stapled packet it contained. She was stunned for a moment. Too stunned to speak.</p>
<p>“Sylvanas, <i>please</i>.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas jumped and her eyes flashed up to meet Jaina’s before they dropped down to the papers again, which she flipped through quickly. Her own hands were shaking, now.</p>
<p>“It's...it's your divorce decree. I...god, it's your final divorce decree-”</p>
<p>Anything else Sylvanas might have said was cut off when Jaina made sudden, solid impact with her - crushing the paperwork between them as she flung her arms around Sylvanas and buried her face in her neck.</p>
<p>It was all Sylvanas could do just to lower them to the floor safely as Jaina sobbed.</p>
<p>But fuck if she wasn't crying, too. Fuck, if they both weren't crying. Desperate, ugly sounds that weren't at all ugly, really. Just necessary. And very, very long in coming. </p>
<p>It was a long time before Jaina finally just dragged against Sylvanas with her forehead against her chest and her hands on the tile floor.</p>
<p>“Is now a bad time to tell you I've waited way too long to marry you?” Sylvanas asked as she spread her awkwardly folded legs out along the floor and pulled Jaina into her lap. </p>
<p>Jaina let out a slightly raspy laugh and wiped her face on Sylvanas’s already-ruined shirt. </p>
<p>“You'll have to wait at least sixty more days, I'm afraid,” Jaina whispered, and Sylvanas pressed a smile into her hair.</p>
<p>“I can do that,” Sylvanas assured as she reached for Jaina’s glasses where they'd fallen in their scramble to get as close to each other as possible. She checked them over carefully before reaching to place them, neatly folded, on the bench next to Jaina’s bag. </p>
<p>“Fuck, dinner is in the car,” Jaina said suddenly, wiping her eyes again quickly to clear the haze from them as she sat up in the cradle of Sylvanas’s legs and looked around to get her bearings. “It's probably ice cold by now.”</p>
<p>“We have a microwave,” Sylvanas almost cooed as she stood and helped Jaina up gingerly. “Chill on the couch while I get it heated up and open a bottle of wine. This is a wine thing, right?”</p>
<p>Jaina almost laughed at Sylvanas’s ridiculousness, but she couldn't bring herself to. It was almost overwhelming how much she loved her, right now. Always, really. But especially right now.</p>
<p>“It's a champagne thing, actually, and there's a really nice bottle in the fridge.”</p>
<p>“We were saving that for…” Sylvanas trailed off and rolled her eyes at herself. “For this. Right.” </p>
<p>“Right,” Jaina agreed with a soft, genuine smile. “I really need to wash my face. I'll be on the couch awaiting my champagne momentarily.”</p>
<p>“Of course, counselor,” Sylvanas said, drawing Jaina in for another hug before she finally released her. “Right away.” </p>
<p>By the time Sylvanas managed to get two plates of reheated Chinese food and two glasses of champagne on a tray, Jaina was right where she said she'd be - curled up in a blanket that was already spread out enough for both of them - looking over the decree. She looked a million miles away as Sylvanas sat the tray down on the coffee table and handed her her glass.</p>
<p>“Everything I asked for,” Jaina remarked as she took the glass without looking. “The funds in the joint account have been released. They'll be dispersed to me via check within seven business days. He's retained the marital debt in exchange for the house.”</p>
<p>Jaina trailed off and placed the packet aside as Sylvanas moved to sit with her. Getting Sylvanas close and bundled up with her seemed very important to her suddenly. </p>
<p>“That's good news,” Sylvanas said as she held her own glass of champagne. She hadn't taken a sip yet, though, and she hadn't sounded so sure about her statement.</p>
<p>“It is,” Jaina reassured her, reaching to cradle the side of her neck with her free hand. “It's the best news I've gotten since I found a bar that could make a decent Manhattan.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas wasn't sure why that got her, but damn, it did. She looked down and nodded as tears danced in her eyes but didn't fall. </p>
<p>“You are so good, sweetheart,” Jaina breathed as she slid her hand around the back of Sylvanas’s neck to stroke along the hair at her nape with her fingertips. “You've been so strong for me. For both of us. I don't know what I would've done without you.”</p>
<p>“Amazing things,” Sylvanas whispered as she turned her head to press her face into Jaina’s palm. “Wonderful things.”</p>
<p>“But they would've been without you,” Jaina argued gently. “And I want you more than I want anything else in this world.”</p>
<p>Sylvanas cleared her throat but it came out as more of a choked whimper than anything else, and Jaina was quickly setting both their glasses to the side.</p>
<p>Their dinner got cold all over again as Jaina wrapped them both tightly in their favorite blanket - a gift from Tandred. Their champagne lost a little of its fizz as Jaina leaned back against the arm of the couch with Sylvanas against her chest.</p>
<p>But cold Chinese and flat champagne were just fine as long as she was having them with Sylvanas.</p>
<p>Incidentally, Sylvanas felt exactly the same.</p>
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</div>Jaina’s eyes fluttered open slowly as the sound of vibration on the table nearby roused her from her sleep.<p>God, she was too old to fall asleep on the couch. </p>
<p>The fact that Sylvanas was tucked between her chest and the back of it, though, softened the blow of the slight ache in her neck. She smiled softly as she reached out to brush her thumb across an eyebrow that was far from delicate, now that it had been slept upon. </p>
<p>Another buzz from behind her nearly made her groan. </p>
<p>That’s right. Her phone. Probably the center. </p>
<p>Whatever time it was, though, it was certainly no time for a legal crisis. At least, that’s what Jaina was hoping. </p>
<p>She sat up gingerly to let Sylvanas continue sleeping as she turned her phone over, and her brow furrowed. </p>
<p>
  <i>Mom</i>
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<p>Jaina stood slowly from the couch and headed for their little back porch with a few glances back at Sylvanas to reassure herself she hadn’t woken her, and she answered the phone just as she slid the patio door shut behind herself. </p>
<p>“Mom? Is everything okay?” </p>
<p>“With me? Yes, Jaina, of course.” </p>
<p>Katherine sounded calm. Thank God. Jaina could at least breathe, now. </p>
<p>“I...that’s good, Mom. It’s late.”</p>
<p>“I know it is, darling. And I’m sorry about that. I just needed to speak with you, and I know you’ve been working long hours. I thought this might be the best time to reach you.”</p>
<p>Jaina looked around their little backyard. Their little backyard with no fence and a couple of trees, and she sat down in one of the cheap reclining deck chairs Sylvanas had brought home when the weather got a little warmer. </p>
<p>Jaina loved them. </p>
<p>“I’m here. I’m listening. You’re being strange.”</p>
<p>Katherine cleared her throat and sighed on the other end of the line. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry, Jaina,” Katherine paused. It was a long pause. Too long. Jaina was itching for one of them to fill it with something. Anything. “For everything. For not hearing you when you were hurting. I can never make that up to you, and I know that. I was calling to tell you that your bill with that attorney of yours is settled, also.”</p>
<p>Jaina was stunned. Great. More silence.</p>
<p>“And I know throwing money at this won’t fix it. God, do I know that better than anyone. Except maybe you. And maybe that’s why I’ve called, too. Maybe that’s another reason I owe you an apology. Perhaps...perhaps I’m the reason you felt success was so important. More important than who you are. More important than your happiness. Are you, Jaina? Are you happy, now? With her?” </p>
<p>Jaina felt like someone had her heart in a vice-grip as she nodded before realizing her mother couldn’t see her. </p>
<p>“I am, Mom,” her voice cracked. She hated it. “She makes me so happy,” She whispered this time. It didn’t help. </p>
<p>“I’d like to meet her, Jaina,” Katherine continued, and Jaina heard an unfamiliar waver in her voice. “Truly. I’d like to come down for a weekend.” </p>
<p>“Mom, my house isn’t...our house is...it’s not-”</p>
<p>“I’m sure it’s perfect, Jaina,” Katherine reassured. She was speaking quietly now, too. Learning steps to an entirely new and unfamiliar dance. “Money doesn’t make a house a home. I learned that when...well. No matter. I want to visit you. Your home. And the woman who’s made it a home with you.” </p>
<p>“Okay,” Jaina breathed with a nervous laugh to mask something Katherine recognized easily. She was her mother, after all. “Okay, I’ll talk to Sylvanas tomorrow. Maybe next weekend?”</p>
<p>“Next weekend sounds lovely,” Katherine said, her tone so gentle it threatened to tear Jaina apart. “That’s a pretty name. Sylvanas.” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Jaina gasped, bringing a hand up quickly to cover her mouth as she nearly lowered the phone from her ear. She drew in a breath. “Yeah, it is.” </p>
<p>“Jaina, darling, I love you. So much more than I’ve shown you. Please let me try to fix that.” </p>
<p>“Okay, Mom,” Jaina said as she clutched the phone tighter to her ear. </p>
<p>This silence was different. A silence Katherine accepted. A silence Jaina needed. </p>
<p>“I miss you,” Jaina finally managed, meaning it with everything in her. “And I love you, too.” </p>
<p>“I should let you go,” Katherine said quickly, and Jaina was fairly certain she heard a sniffle in a voice thick with emotion. </p>
<p>“Yeah. Night, Mom,”</p>
<p>“Good night, my darling girl.” </p>
<p>Jaina let out a shuddering breath as she used the sleeve of her sweater to wipe her eyes and realized for the first time just how cold her bare legs were. </p>
<p>“Baby?” </p>
<p>Jaina turned her head quickly to find Sylvanas looking at her through the now-open patio door. </p>
<p>“Sylvanas…”</p>
<p>Sylvanas just smiled softly.</p>
<p>“Come to bed and put your cold feet all over my perfectly smooth legs, please,” Sylvanas responded. If Jaina wanted to talk about the call, she would. But probably not tonight, and Sylvanas knew that. “I just shaved today.”</p>
<p>Jaina slipped out of the chair she’d been curled in and took Sylvanas’s hand as it was offered to her. She watched Sylvanas fiddle with the mostly-functional lock on the sliding door, and then followed her to their cozy little bedroom. </p>
<p>But it was big enough.</p>
<p>It was good enough.</p>
<p>It all was.</p>
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<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Sight of the Sun - Epilogue</h2></a>
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<i>The city outside is nothing but a flicker now</i></p>
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<i>You see our friends to bed, you turn out the lights</i></p>
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<i>I start to think you’ll make a beautiful mother I,</i></p>
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<i>I like to think I have everything I want from this life</i></p>
</div>Sylvanas smiled softly as she lay with her chest against Jaina’s back with an arm draped over her side. The volume on the TV was low, but the light it cast across Jaina was more than enough for Sylvanas to see her by the way Sylvanas was propped up behind her.<p>“You always do that,” Sylvanas observed quietly, running her thumb against Jaina’s stomach through her nightshirt softly as Jaina’s eyes shifted from the baking show playing on the tv to catch Sylvanas in the periphery of her vision. </p><p>“What?” Jaina asked quietly, rolling over so she was facing Sylvanas. A movement Sylvanas accommodated easily. </p><p>“You touch your ring all the time. When you’re watching TV or reading or anything that takes most of your attention, really.” Sylvanas took Jaina’s hand into her own when she made to tuck it between them, perhaps a little shy about having that little tick pointed out. </p><p>Jaina shrugged and pressed a little closer. “Maybe I just like knowing it’s there. I can’t constantly ask for you to remind me that we’re married. That’s just odd. But I can do that, and I hadn’t ever really thought about the possibility that you’d noticed.” </p><p>“I never brought it up because I didn’t want to ruin it. I can’t describe how it makes me feel. I hope you never stop,” Sylvanas brought Jaina’s hands to her lips then and pressed a soft kiss to the ring Jaina had been toying with since they’d settled in for bed. </p><p>Jaina let out a soft breath of a laugh and shook her head. </p><p>“Turn off the TV, Sylvanas,” She murmured quietly, and Sylvanas lifted a brow in response but did as she’d been asked. </p><p>“Ready for bed?” Sylvanas asked as she placed the remote on the nightstand once they were blanketed by darkness. </p><p>“No, I’m going to sleep with you, and then I’ll be ready for bed,” Jaina responded in a very matter-of-fact tone. </p><p>Sylvanas couldn’t help the way she grinned in response. “Oh? Is that so? What’d I do to deserve that?” </p><p>“First of all,” Jaina began as she slipped a hand beneath her wife’s shirt to stroke along her stomach. “We have sex all the time.” </p><p>Sylvanas chuckled quietly. “Fair.”</p><p>“Second of all,” Jaina continued, dropping her hand to the tie of Sylvanas’s pajama pants and tugging it loose. “You’re just really fucking sweet and it’s very attractive.”</p><p>“Well, I accept, then,” Sylvanas breathed, and Jaina snorted softly. It might have sounded derisive were she not looking at Sylvanas like she hung the moon and stars. </p><p>“I’m glad to hear that. Now, you’re wearing way too many clothes and I can’t see. So you should probably do something about that because I have court in the morning and I don’t have all night to undress you.”</p><p>Sylvanas muttered something about bossiness under her breath, but Jaina was just all the more amused for it as Sylvanas tugged her own shirt over her head and wiggled her way out of her sleep pants - struggling to kick them away from her feet and onto the floor despite the confines of their sheets. </p><p>“Smooth,” Jaina remarked as Sylvanas finally managed, with a quiet huff, to rid herself of her last article of clothing before leaning back down onto an elbow to look at Jaina with one of her ears cocked slightly to the side. She looked disgruntled and lovely and just as perfect as she always did. </p><p>There was little else for Jaina to do aside from pull her into a soft kiss. </p><p>“Mean,” Sylvanas accused against Jaina’s lips despite the fact that her hand was wandering, now, along the small of Jaina’s back to toy with the hem of her shirt. </p><p>“What can I do to make it up to you?” Jaina asked, sounding genuinely sorry despite the fact that she very much wasn’t. That much, Sylvanas could tell. At least, if the way Jaina’s lips had curled into a smile against her own as she kissed her again was anything to go by. </p><p>“Dunno,” Sylvanas sounded almost convincingly sulky. Almost. “But I'm feeling toppy.”</p><p>“Oh,” Jaina stroked along Sylvanas’s bare sides as she moved to lean with her back against the headboard while her wife pulled her underwear down her legs. “Is this a reclaiming your dignity thing?”</p><p>“Maybe,” Sylvanas flashed her eyes up at Jaina, and Jaina wondered if the soft glow of them would ever stop leaving her breathless. “You know how little dignity I've always had…”</p><p>Jaina snorted again. This time, it turned into a little laugh. “In bed? God, you're the cockiest lay I've ever had in my life. Don't even.”</p><p>“I can't believe you'd use such vile language with your wife,” Sylvanas murmured into the crook of Jaina’s neck as she buried her face there and lifted Jaina’s hips into her lap. Jaina stayed leaned back against the headboard rather casually as she wrapped her legs around Sylvanas’s waist to keep her just a touch to close to really soft anything productive.</p><p>“I'm so sorry. Really,” Jaina reached up and found the back of Sylvanas’s neck to guide her up and away from her neck so she could see her face again. “What I meant to say is that I find your confidence in the bedroom maddeningly satisfying and arousing beyond all reason.”</p><p>“Better,” Sylvanas was still grinning impishly as she rested their foreheads together and began drawing Jaina’s shirt slowly up the front of her body.</p><p>The mood shifted, then, as she grazed Jaina’s breasts with the backs of her fingers - purposely lingering against her nipples. It often went like this, now. Their moods shifting fluidly between trying to get under each other’s skin in an altogether <i>good</i> way, and sensual, wordless touching that spoke of deep understanding and familiarity. </p><p>“I'm feeling very bottomy, suddenly,” Jaina murmured against Sylvanas’s lips when she found them grazing her own. The mood didn't shift this time, as Sylvanas drew Jaina’s shirt over her head and tossed it aside.</p><p>“That’s hot, babe,” Sylvanas breathed against Jaina’s shoulder as her hands kneaded gently against her breasts for a moment longer before finding a slow, languid path down her sides to her thighs. </p><p>Her mouth did a good job of making up for the absence of her hands as she bent over Jaina and found one of her hard, sensitive nipples. First with her lips, then with her teeth. She tugged just enough to earn a soft, appreciative hiss from Jaina, whose hips were now shifting subtly in her lap. </p><p>Jaina couldn't really help that. Not that she wanted to. Not with the way Sylvanas’s hands had slipped up her inner thighs until her thumbs were grazing against the apex of them. </p><p>Sylvanas decided, then, that Jaina’s early-morning court appointment was good enough reason not to draw things out any longer than she already had. She moved her legs gradually out from underneath Jaina - lowering her to the bed with her hands beneath her hips.</p><p>The next time Sylvanas looked up, Jaina was wearing an almost coy little half-smile in response to the sight of Sylvanas laying on her chest between her legs. </p><p>“You always know just what I want,” Jaina mused as she brushed her fingertips against her wife’s ear to find it shifting subtly towards the softness of her touch.</p><p>“My wife? Wanting good head?” Sylvanas asked in a low murmur against Jaina’s hip all while maintaining eye contact with her. “Color me shocked.”</p><p>“Don't make me kick you out of bed, Sylvanas Windrunner,” Jaina threatened, not meaning it in the least.</p><p>“You wouldn't,” Sylvanas said as she used her fingertips to spread Jaina slowly so that the warm breath behind those words ghosted against her exposed clit.</p><p>Jaina’s head fell against the headboard and her chest rose sharply, then, as her hand moved to tangle in her wife’s hair loosely. “Not right now, I wouldn't.” </p><p>Sylvanas’s eyes fell shut as she pressed a single kiss against the hood of Jaina’s clit before slicking it wetly with her tongue. </p><p>Jaina sighed softly as she settled into the sensation - lifting her legs easily as Sylvanas’s arms moved under and around them to support her all without a single pause in the slow, attentive movements of her tongue. Only her tongue, for now. Circling and stroking and lapping softly as Jaina’s thighs tensed and untensed against Sylvanas’s arms.</p><p>“Fuck,” Jaina gasped when Sylvanas finally pressed in a little harder and sucked against her clit. “So good, baby. You're so good.”</p><p>Sylvanas moaned deeply, then. She moaned for the praise and for the wetness she felt pooling against her chin. Even as Jaina panted softly, Sylvanas’s breaths were coming sharp and uneven the less of them she was able to take. </p><p>It wasn't long, though, before Jaina’s hips went utterly still and her hold on Sylvanas's hair tightened enough to sting. She tried to speak a few times. Tried to tell Sylvanas she was close. Not to stop. Right there.</p><p>Sylvanas didn't need the words to understand, though. She drew the orgasm from Jaina perfectly. In a way that crested so slowly and so wholly, her entire body flushed with it as the warmth of it all overcame her.</p><p>Jaina’s hand was trembling when it let go of the mess she'd made of her wife’s hair.</p><p>Sylvanas wasn't done, though. She rarely was.</p><p>Jaina could only let out a quiet murmur of her name as she felt the pressure of fingertips against her slick entrance. </p><p>She did manage to reach down weakly toward’s Sylvanas’s leg where it was bent upward along the bed.</p><p>“Closer,” she whispered, and Sylvanas twisted and turned until she was on her side with Jaina’s leg over her waist and her upper half still right where she wanted to be. </p><p>She lifted a leg for Jaina and bent it at the knee, and Jaina kneaded at her thigh when Sylvanas first slipped a single finger into her - moving it slowly in and out of the wetness it had found. </p><p>Jaina huffed and looked down as she pressed her hand against Sylvanas - cupping the glistening evidence of her arousal in her hand before she returned the favor with not one finger but two. Delving and curving until they were both breathless. </p><p>Sylvanas’s movements weren't quite as fluid now that Jaina was fucking her, but that really didn't matter. The shared pleasure of it all was more than enough. </p><p>Her mouth had returned to its previous task against Jaina’s clit even as her first finger was joined by a second inside her.</p><p>Jaina rewarded the attention by quickening her pace, which earned her a trembling, breathy groan from Sylvanas who now lifted her head to drag a desperate breath into her lungs as she pressed her face into the softness of Jaina’s stomach.</p><p>Jaina knew Sylvanas was close. Close enough that her entire body was tense and she was gripping desperately at the sheets. Yet, still, Sylvanas kept on - now pressing the heel of her palm above where her fingers were working into Jaina so her wife could find friction against it with the movement of her hips. </p><p>Sylvanas came first. And she came hard. Hard enough that she forgot herself and allowed her fangs to catch a little too deeply against the soft skin of Jaina’s stomach between her navel and her hip. </p><p>Jaina didn't mind the sometimes-bites. This one, in particular, mingled with the fullness from Sylvanas’s now-unmoving fingers, and with a shuddering groan and one last jerk of her hips against Sylvanas’s hand, she was coming, too. </p><p>Sylvanas pressed her sweat-slicked forehead against Jaina’s leg, then, and closed her thighs in a way that trapped Jaina’s hand - both keeping it where it was and hampering it from moving against her over-stimulated body. </p><p>It was Jaina tonight, who shuffled through their dark bedroom and ran the water in their bathroom sink until it was acceptably warm for the cloth she'd snagged from a nearby shelf. It was Jaina who returned with both that cloth and a glass of water they both desperately needed.</p><p>Soon, they were both adequately clean and hydrated and Jaina was laying with her head against Sylvanas’s still-flushed chest listening to her heartbeat slow gradually to normalcy. </p><p>“Syl,” Jaina whispered her wife’s name, and Sylvanas murmured her acknowledgment as she continued combing her fingers through Jaina’s hair.</p><p>“I've been thinking about something lately. A lot. I haven't brought it up. It just never seems like the right time.”</p><p>Sylvanas carefully slipped her hand beneath Jaina’s chin to guide her head so that her opposite cheek was against her chest so she could look at her. </p><p>“Now’s the right time,” Sylvanas said without hesitation, sliding her hand down along Jaina’s neck until it was resting against her shoulder. “Promise.”</p><p>Jaina looked at her for a while longer before gradually pushing herself up so that she was sitting, and Sylvanas did the same - her legs folded and one of her hands resting on Jaina’s knee. “Talk to me.”</p><p>“I don't want to scare you,” Jaina breathed as she covered her wife's hand with her own.</p><p>“I'm not scared, J,” Sylvanas sounded so sure it almost made Jaina laugh. </p><p>“Okay. Fair enough. Let me preface this with a question. Is it fucked up to bring up my ex-husband when we just had sex and are both still naked?”</p><p>Sylvanas’s brow furrowed as her thoughts kicked into overdrive trying to decipher the situation.</p><p>“I'm...no? Maybe it depends on the context?”</p><p>Jaina sighed and nodded.</p><p>“Okay, so the context is that...fuck. Syl, do you know why I did what I did? Married him? Stayed? Even though it had all already started to change by then?”</p><p>Sylvanas stayed quiet. This wasn't really her question to answer, and she knew that.</p><p>“Because I was young and stupid and I thought that was the only way I could have a family. I thought I could have that with him. I believed that. And then, I knew I couldn't. I knew I could never raise a child with him. I had no desire to. And I thought that part of me was gone, you know? I thought I was over it. And maybe for a while I was. But God, sometimes I look at you and all I can think is that you'd be a wonderful mother. That we would be so good at figuring it out together.”</p><p>Jaina stopped when her voice broke, and Sylvanas shifted closer and reached out to stroke a tear from Jaina’s cheek with the back of a finger. </p><p>“Sorry,” Jaina breathed, rolling her eyes at herself and looking over Sylvanas's shoulder instead of at her. “If it's not something you want, I promise it's fine, Syl. I swear.”</p><p>“I want that so much,” Sylvanas whispered, breathless and without hesitation. “Jaina, I want it so fucking much.”</p><p>Jaina’s glassy eyes snapped to her own and she looked almost confused for a moment. “You're serious?”</p><p>“I'm so serious, baby. I'm so fucking serious. We can look into adoption, you know. Look at what I do. I'm in the system every day, it would be so easy for us. I could make it so easy for us.” </p><p>Sylvanas sounded almost desperately earnest. It was almost overwhelming. </p><p>“Yeah?” Jaina whispered, this time lifting a hand to dry her own eyes so Sylvanas wouldn't have to do it for her, again. </p><p>“Yeah,” Sylvanas reiterated, reaching her arms out towards Jaina who, of course, gladly climbed into them with enough force that they were falling back into the pillows. </p><p>Sylvanas stroked along Jaina’s back as Jaina dug the pads of her fingers into her shoulders in turn. </p><p>“I'm clearing a few case files this week, but we can start looking into it next week?” Sylvanas asked, her voice muffled in Jaina’s chest where her face had wound up rather smushed. </p><p>“Next week is fine,” Jaina said, trying to keep her voice even so as not to let onto the fact that she was utterly beside herself.</p><p>“Next week, then. But sleep tonight. You still have court early,” Sylvanas still sounded so gentle. So careful.</p><p>And underneath that, Jaina knew she heard a faint tremor of emotion. And she'd heard that sound enough times to know it was happiness. Maybe a little excitement. Maybe just too much of both and too late at night for Sylvanas to work through. </p><p>“Sleep would be nice, yeah,” Jaina responded, unburying Sylvanas from both herself and the pillows - all of which she did her best to fix so that they could lay back down comfortably much like they had been before this all started.</p><p>The TV stayed off this time, though, as Jaina twined one of her legs between her wife’s and traced little patterns along Sylvanas’s bare side beneath the sheets. </p><p>Neither of them really thought they'd be able to sleep after that conversation, but they'd both been wrong. Jaina wasn't immune to having her hair played with in just the right way any more than Sylvanas was immune to the soft touches of Jaina’s fingertips along the small of her back. </p><p>They fought it off just long enough to exchange a set of half-aware ‘I love you’s, but that was about it. </p><p>For that night, anyway.</p><p>There were a million more ‘I love you’s to come. ‘I love you’s and bedtime stories and skinned knees and Aunt Valeeras and Auntie Tesses and it was all going to be beautiful. </p><p>As second chances often are.</p>
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